Chronicles of the
Children of Destiny
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
Copyright 6179 SC
The Ruling Power
Daniel’s Last Laugh
Morning Stars of Glory: Melanie
Melanie and Daniel 4
Melanie and Daniel 5
Saruviel the Dreaded Antichrist
4 O'Clock 5
A Glimpse of Hope and Unity
Melanie and Daniel 6
Melanie and Daniel 7
The Divine Mystery
Chronicles of the
Children of Destiny
And so 7 orders of existence have come, and 7 orders of existence have gone. And each time, at the culmination of Glory, at the culminations of death, the end has come, and there has been rest.
But God's plans of 7 orders of realms were complete, for now, and an 8th realm - a more lasting, eternal realm, was now to be born. And what was first would again be last, yet all now united as one. All 7 realms now united as one.
And memories were to be restored, and fulfilments of desires long on hold would reawaken, and eternal destinies would be more suitably crafted out in the very hearts of those treading down upon them. For a return, to a new beginning, a new day, a new week, and a whole, brand new, adventure. A whole, brand new, adventure.
The Ruling Power
'Now, you two,' said the Theophany of God.
Valandriel and Daniel looked guiltily at God, who was seated on his throne in Zaphon.
'I have had my eye on the both of you. Arch Regent and Prime Minister of the Realm of Eternity you both may be, but I haven't completely ticked you off as approved. There are still some quirks in both of you I want a good long hard look at. So while I am sure you have had your fun, it will be your grandfather Cherubim Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly that you are responsible to now Daniel, in your royal duties, and I place him as your head pastor and authority, from his base as founder and Universal Superintendent of the Advancing Noah Movement. Valandriel, you are part of Haven Noahide Fellowship, so you will answer to Cherubim Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly as well. He is my first Authority, for the time being, in the Realm of Eternity. If you progress in regular ways and show improvement, you will win your positions officially. I hope that is understood.'
'Yes God,' sighed Daniel.
'Yes Father,' replied Valandriel.
'You may go,' said God, and waved them away.
Sitting in the cafeteria of Zaphon.
'Your gramps isn't too bad a guy. A little strict but it should be ok. We'll get our jobs officially in the end,' said Valandriel.
'Patience kemosabe. As I tell you often.'
'Patience,' agreed Valandriel. And they would likely need it.
'Daniel’s Last Laugh’
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
Now how are Adam and Eve going to get out of this one? Mmmm.
Satan was back to his best. His most evil, malevolent, and darkest best. The Lord of Misrule – rebellious as ever.
7 orders of existence had come, and 7 orders of existence had gone, and they had rested each time, refreshed, learning, supposedly, the lessons they were supposed to learn. Supposedly.
And then they had been the children of God for a long time but now, again, the Children of Destiny. The Children of Destiny. The Children of Destiny.
* * * * *
‘The door won’t open, Adam,’ said Eve.
‘Fuck Satan. I hate his fucking guts. The bastard never means it when he says he has finally repented.’
‘I don’t think he ever will,’ said Eve. ‘But how the fuck do we get out of this mess? We are 3 kilometres under ground, with no food or water, and he has probably locked every fucking door up to the surface.’
Adam nodded. ‘We could be fucked, babe. We could be fucked.’
‘So, death, again,’ said Eve. ‘I suppose we will end up back in heaven. I guess we shouldn’t complain.’
‘We could finally do it,’ responded Adam. ‘Kill Satan, I mean. Like we always planned. Teach the bastard a lesson.’
Eve looked at the father of mankind. ‘I don’t think so. We are the good guys. They are the bad guys. Some things are just eternal in the end, Man. Some things are just eternal.’
‘I guess so.’
He looked at the door, and noticed it had an electronic lock. He looked around the room, and noticed a bookcase with a bunch of electronic gizmos he had not noticed when they were first put into the room by the 7 Saruvim. ‘Could be something here,’ said Adam.
‘What?’ said Eve, coming over to look at the bookcase. ‘You think you can find something to open the door.’
‘You never know,’ he responded. ‘The Dralikon probably had a way to get out of this room. They are resourceful like that.’
‘I suppose,’ said Eve, looking at the bookcase. ‘What about this?’ she asked, picking up a rod with numbers and a thing which looked like a key on the end.’
‘That might be it,’ said Adam. He looked at the gizmo. ‘There is an on switch.’
‘Try it,’ she said.
He pushed the button, but no response. He looked at the end of the gizmo, found the battery compartment, and opened it to find no batteries. ‘Fuck’ he said. ‘I have some of these.’ He opened his backpack, took out a fresh pack of batteries, and put them into the gizmo. He prayed a silent prayer, turned on the on switch, and lights started flickering on it.’
‘Right,’ said Eve. ‘Now lets hope it opens the fucking door.’
‘Let’s hope so,’ responded the Father of mankind.
* * * * *
Archangel Michael was, relatively speaking, an experienced angel at the ‘Ultra-Risk tournaments’. Ultra-Risk was a boardgame with a difference – it took place in a giant circular room, sealed all around with glass window looking panes, a different competitor in each of the sealed rooms behind each glass compartment. In the large central circular room was the map of the world – planet earth – broken down into the traditional provincial structure of the original ‘Risk’ boardgame and then, to make matters more interesting, a further regional substructure within the provinces, ranging from 20 to 30 regions per province. Technically the number of players in ‘Ultra-Risk’ could range from a minimum of a dozen or so players, to quite a large number, but 45 players was the standard number devised by the Seraphim Daniel for the playing of the ‘Ultra-Risk’ competition. The map itself was a real life model of earth-like structures, and little robotic pieces made up all the relevant attacking forces in the game. In essence, a larger than life equivalent of the basic board game, with greatly expanded rules which, really, could get quite complicated. There were about 7 major ways of playing the ‘Ultra-Risk’ tournament, from standard turn-by-turn variations to a variety of approaches. But, naturally, Michael had mastered them all by now. Daniel was great at the game also, as well as Gabriel and Saruviel and Ambriel. They all competed regularly, a major hobby of their eternal lives, and were happy enough doing so. And of course, in world rankings, Saruviel was still number one – and had been for quite a while.
Which was why, today, Michael was grinding it out in a standard competition to earn some ranking points – he would catch his Satanic adversary – he would catch him, and regain his former glory.
Daniel, seated on the other side of Michael in the ‘Ultra-Risk’ centre in Zaphora, not far from Danielphon, looked across the chamber at Michael, who was concentrating on his monitor stats screen. ‘So are we going to get him today, Vally Boy?’
Valandriel said nothing, but Ariel spoke up. ‘Dream on, Danny. You have slipped, brother dearest. Right down to your standard 45th mentality. Even Loquiel can kick your arse these days.’
‘Oh well. I guess the theophany is having his way in the end. Telling me to relax – not try so hard – live in my natural place.’
‘Probably,’ said Valandriel. ‘Look, Danny. We all know to well your capabilities when you really compete – when you really work your arse off – and they are glorious, bro. But 45 is your spot on the list, and God is happiest when you are just yourself. So as Farouk Bulsara sings to you, don’t try so hard mate. And it is better for all of us.’
‘Kapiche,’ said the Arch-Regent of the Realm of Eternity to its Prime Minister.
He stared across over at Michael, and thought he would show his older brother some natural respect, and concentrate on another opponent. Best not to push Mikey too hard – best not to compete with him so savagely in the end – in a natural way, he was in truth about 45th, because he naturally did not normally compete that hard in the end. So best to be himself. Best to be himself.
Cosadriel, sitting next to Azrael, watching Kwintakel at the controls, was happy. Kwinty had been kicking Michael’s arse for the last 7 rounds. But Saddy was still cautious. Michael was a cunning old fox, and wanted his points pretty badly in his long competition with Saruviel. Perhaps they should go easy – let the old fox have his day. Perhaps. And then Saddy whispered into the Kwintakel’s ear that, as she held the Middle-East province and the region with ‘Megiddo’ in it, and had 5 full risk cards, she should have a go and announce ‘Armageddon’. Kwinty smiled at the idea but said ‘I don’t think so, Saddy. I don’t think so.’
‘Pity,’ said Cosadriel. ‘The end of the world could have been interesting,’ which made Azrael smile.
Totambimberiel examined the board. He looked at the Middle East, and his strength in Asia. He was the second strongest on the board, but with an alliance with Kwintakel and a quick ‘offer Armageddon’ move, perhaps they could hold on and overcome all adversaries if they were lucky. Sure. May as well have a go, thought the Cherubim to himself.
Kwintakel received the ‘Offer Armageddon’ signal, looked over at Totambimberiel who was waving at her, and nodded.
‘So you are going to accept it?’ asked Cosadriel.
‘May as well, now,’ said Kwintakel. ‘With Toties help we should hold on and claim the points.’
‘Good luck,’ said Azrael who was thoughtfully looking at the board.
The game was on – Armageddon was declared – and the final victor over the middle east – the last man standing – would claim the most points.
The battles were ferocious, no quarter was given, and Michael, finishing second, was relieved. Major points – major points. But well done Kwintakel and Totambimberiel – a decisive victory.
Out in the canteen later, after the match, the 100 or so people gathered, competitors and friends, were all having a friendly chat, going over the match, eating their coffee and tea and bikkies, happy with life, happy with everything.
Michael chatted with Kwintakel for a while, discussing the strategies she had used in the game, and all in all it was a wonderful afternoon.
* * * * *
It took 7 hours of fiddling with numbers when Eve pointed to a little sign above the doorway with the number 7859 on it. Adam shrugged, punched in the number, put the key in the lock, pressed the trigger, and laughed as the door lurched open.
‘We will probably need the device,’ said Eve. ‘Do you have more batteries?’
‘It was a double pack. Hopefully we won’t run out.’
‘Then up we go,’ said Eve.
* * * * *
Satan, with the 6 other Saruvim, up on the surface of the planet ‘Enigma 48’ in the heart of Dralikon territory, laughed. He was monitoring the ‘Hive’ as it was called from a control panel on board the ‘Iron Storm’, the space cruiser which was sitting stationary on the large meadow, a way off from the abandoned city of ‘Zhabadar’. Of course, ‘Enigma 48’ had no residents anymore – Satan had purchased the planet from the Dralikon from a hefty sum for his fun and games – and locking up Adam and Eve down in the hive was his and the Saruvim’s idea of a fun practical joke to play.
‘They have figured it out,’ said Satan to the other Saruvim.
‘What now?’ asked Samaen.
‘We go home. Let them escape. We have had our fun. God will only fuck with us big time if we hinder them too much. You know him.’
‘Don’t I,’ said Samaen.
‘We’ll leave one of the ‘Cubs’,’ said Satan,’ about one of the little podships the Iron Storm housed. ‘That should get them back to heaven.’
‘Right on,’ said Lucifer.
Samaen punched in a few keys on the control panel and, shortly, one of the cubs emerged from the docking bay, landed on the surface, opened its doors, and sat there.
‘Now lets get the fuck out of here,’ said Satan, and as the Iron Storm took off, he gave the parents of mankind one last look, satisfied they would escape the hive alright, and flicked off the screen.
* * * * *
Daniel was back home at Danielphon, with Ariel, looking at the PC screen. He had gotten good points from the battle and had risen about 700 Quintillion places in rankings, which was not surprising – there were a hell of a lot of competitors in Ultra-Risk realm wide – but, as he watched on, hitting refresh on his screen occasionally, every single time his ranking dropped a humungous number of places. But that was life in the Realm of Eternity with a population that was practically just that – eternal.
‘Well done,’ said Ariel.
‘I am well entrenched in the top 1% you know,’ he said a little smugly. ‘It would probably take a billion years or so before I dropped out of it, if then, if I didn’t play in all that time.’
‘Don’t be cocky,’ she said. ‘Remember, Saruviel plays quite a bit. And wins at the big competitions with the big bonus points on offer.’
‘I know. I don’t care, sweetie. Top 1% will do in the end. I might even strive eventually for the top 1% of the top 1%.’
‘That will take some getting,’ she said.
‘Probably. But its worth the effort. Bragging rights.’
‘Smug bastard,’ she said, and walked away to get dinner started.
Daniel looked at his ranking for a little while longer, turned off the computer screen, and wandered out to the dining room and flicked on the TV screen.
‘Anything on TV?’ he asked.
A computer voice spoke up. ‘Some of your favourites are currently showing, Daniel. Would you like me to choose something?’
‘Go ahead,’ responded the Seraphim, and the TV selected an episode of ‘The Goodies’ which had just started.
Daniel smiled, settled in for a while, as Ariel steadily prepared the stir fry and rice and buzzed away to herself, in her own little world of Ariel.
* * * * *
George Lucas smiled at Steven’s suggestion. ‘Look, Mr Spielberg, while I appreciate the notion that a Star Wars episode 10,001 would be a good money earner, the saga is finished forever. 10,000 episodes – the perfect number – nothing more, nothing less.’
Spielberg nodded. ‘I thought that also about Close Encounters 1 million. That it would be the end of the saga, but new ideas inevitably beckon George. And, lo and behold, the ten millionth in that series is approaching.’
‘I would want good money,’ said George. ‘And it is only because we are good friends.’
‘I think I can promise you a hell of an advance. Quite a bit these days.’
George nodded. ‘Do you want to direct?’
‘Love to,’ responded Mr Spielberg.
George nodded. ‘Can I borrow your laptop?’
Steven handed it over, and George flicked it on, pulled a USB out of his pocket, and after some typing handed it back to Steven. ‘I have uploaded episode 10,001 to 20,000 to your laptop. There are more written, but I don’t want to spoil the surprise.’
‘You old fox,’ said Steven. ‘How many of them have you done then?’
‘Wouldn’t you like to know,’ said the master of the force.
* * * * *
Adam looked at the cub. ‘I guess Satan has left it for us. I suppose he is not that evil in the end after all.’
‘I don’t trust it,’ said Eve. ‘Its too fucking easy. His games last ages – he wouldn’t make it this simple.’
‘Perhaps he is finally getting older,’ responded Adam. ‘Growing up. Getting over it.’
‘Its been long enough,’ said Eve. ‘He probably should by now.’
‘You can never tell with some people,’ responded Adam. ‘It takes them an eternity to work things out properly.’
‘Perhaps,’ said Eve. ‘Well, we’ll check out the ship anyway. Either that, or you and I may end up breeding here and building up a new humanity.’
‘We’ve done it before,’ said Adam, which made Eve smile.
* * * * *
Daniel was out the back of Danielphon, looking at his comic collection. Ariel was with him. ‘Action comics number 1, huh,’ she said, looking at the comic in the mylar sleeve he had handed her.
‘It is fucking old,’ Ariel. ‘God preserved it perfectly in between the rests. Danielphon slumbered in perfect peace. It is the Realm’s original copy.’
‘So how much is it worth then?’ she asked him.
‘Fuck,’ he said. ‘Don’t really know. But a hell of a lot. With the right purchaser, and I mean that. But with the right purchaser we could almost afford a room in Zaphon tower.’
She looked at him incredulously. ‘THAT must be a hell of an expensive comic. A room in Zaphon – well – that is quite a number of galaxy’s in value, isn’t it?’
‘Probably that much,’ he agreed. ‘Possibly more. But with that kind of room for your future seed to live in, well even selling a place in Zaphon might kind of become attractive.’
‘I suppose,’ she responded. ‘Amazing. Just one comic.’
‘That is why I keep them,’ said Daniel proudly. ‘Because they inevitably rise in value. They inevitably rise.’
With that said she came and hugged her man, and gave him a kiss on the cheek. He was a wise angel in the end, was Daniel. A wise angel indeed.
* * * * *
Michael smiled at the latest ‘Ultra-Risk’ ratings. 17th on the list. His ranking unchanged. But old Dramlock, 16th on the list – well his lead was not as much anymore. He was catching him. Dramlock played the big realm tournaments – only the big ones. Michael had studied him carefully for a few thousand years. He was a sensible Cherubim, always had been, and crafted his way through the Ultra-Risk community with style and aplomb, always complementing his opponents, always encouraging them, always giving them a friendly smile. Yes, he was deadly. Perhaps a challenge – should he? Should he? But, no. Not yet. Challenges were reserved for the deadliest player on the list – dread Saruviel. The Satanic master of Ultra-Risk. That was the one he would wait upon. His challenges would be reserved for him alone. For dread Saruviel alone.
Elenniel brought in a painting, of Michael, with a Rainbow above his head.
‘Why a rainbow?’
‘Because you are such a colourful personality, Michael.’
He smiled at that. ‘Wouldn’t Daniel be a better subject for a rainbow? He is the eternal Noahide Warrior after all. Not me.’
‘But you are my special colourful one,’ she said, kissing him on the cheek. He smiled as she left the room and looked at the painting. It seemed, no matter how many she had done of him, there was always a new surprise.
* * * * *
‘There are 3 ways for you to die, Devil. 3 ways to die, and 1 way to live.’
Satan, handcuffed, being held over the edge of a large cliff by Eve, Adam standing by with a shotgun which was in fact loaded, smiled at the bitch.
‘Yeh. But a pussy like you will only kill me with herpes.’
‘Really,’ she said and, grinning, spat on his face. ‘Then that should take care of that,’ said Eve, and Adam smiled.
‘So what are the 3 ways?’ queried the Lord of Darkness.
Eve looked at him. ‘Well, 1. I can let you go.’ Satan turned his head, looked down at the roaring ocean below and the very jagged looking cliffs.
‘Option 2?’ he asked.
‘I can blow your head off,’ said Adam, brandishing the shotgun.
‘Mmm, I think I’ll pass,’ responded the Lord of Evil. ‘Option 3?’
Eve looked at Adam. ‘What was option 3 again, sweetie?’
‘Fucked if I know,’ responded Adam. ‘It was your list.’
‘Right,’ she nodded, and turned back to her adversary. ‘Well lets just say, Satan. It will be unpleasant. Very, very unpleasant.’
‘Right,’ said Satan. ‘Ok. Fuck it. Call me a wimp, but what is the one way to live option?’
Eve brought him upright, and Adam came over, with an extensive looking contract.
‘What is that?’ asked Satan.
‘Oh, good news for us, and potentially you as well. Heh heh heh. If you play by the rules, that is.’
‘What do I have to do?’ he asked.
‘Basically, just leave us be. Mostly just that. No more games. Oh, there are certain requirements, but I am sure you will manage them. But, we aren’t screwing with you too much – leave us alone, and everything will work out fine for you.’
‘Or else what?’
‘Shark fodder,’ said Eve with a smile.
He looked at her, looked into her eyes, really thought she wouldn’t go through with it in the end, but decided it would be best not to risk it. He had tormented her enough over the aeons after all anyway.
‘Were do I sign?’ he asked.
Eve unlocked the handcuffs while Adam pointed the shotgun at him, and Eve showed him the page for his signature, produced a pen, and Satan, looking at Adam, realizing he would probably have to in the end anyway, signed his life away.
Adam looked at the signature, smiled to himself, and lowered his gun. ‘Right. We all know your kind always keep their contracts.’
‘Hey, its what we do,’ responded Satan.
‘You will have a copy of the contract for you at email address email@example.com . I know that is your biggie for everyone, so you will have to fish out our names in the search terms. But I am sure you will find the email – eventually.’
Satan almost swore, but thought better of it. ‘I’ll read the contract, Adam. I’ll read it. But I am the master of the loophole.’
‘You had better be,’ said Eve. ‘We have been studying law for a while, Sat, and this one is pretty watertight. So scram, freak.’
The dark lord looked at his adversaries, rubbed his wrists, and walked off. For now he would leave them be, look at his contract, and see what was what. Whatever they had over him, well he was sure he could wrangle his way out of it. He was sure.
* * * * *
Spielberg worked overtime for 3 months straight, consulted with George heavily, and had Star Wars Episode 10,001 in the theatre with the previews of the movie scaring the hell out of the audience. ‘You must be kidding,’ was the common reaction. ‘Wasn’t Lucas finished?’
Of course, the day of release, the cue went back several hundred metres for each session, and despite most theatres devoting their entire cinemas to the film, it took a long while to satisfy demand – 3 and a half years, to be precise, in most places, before high demand started slacking off. The film was a shocker to most, picking up on an unexpected tangent from the blockbuster conclusion to episode 10,000 but, really, looking the goods. And with a title like ‘Star Wars Episode 10,0000: The Return of Darth Vader’, you would expect it to be popular.
George Lucas never saw any of the filming – he left that all to Steven – he wanted to be surprised. And as he sat there watching ‘A Long Time ago in a Galaxy Far, Far away’, ready for the sudden burst of the title theme, he escaped into his own little world of the force, munching on his popcorn, drinking his coca cola, his wife next to him, happy as he could possibly be.
* * * * *
The Theophany sat with Metatron, looking at the computer screen.
‘Give it a sec,’ said Metatron. ‘I am 100% sure this is the key game.’
The theophany watched on nervously. And than up spun the statistics. God – 50% / Metatron 50%. They were finally equal on number of overall games won. Metatron had caught up.
‘You little devil,’ said God to his son with a grin.
‘Gotcha old man,’ responded Metatron.
Memra spoke up. ‘But what does the future hold?’
‘I guess only time will tell,’ finished Logos, and they all said Amen.
‘So,’ said the theophany to Daniel the Seraphim, ‘The evil recently surpassed the legal amount I required for fulfilment of the death penalty. Adam and Eve now have a contract with him, and they can really mess with him if he violates it. But, technically, if somebody wanted to go off and kill the host of the Saruvim, there would be no callback. They have committed several murders as a group over the years, several individual murders, and a whole host of other evils. They have always been careful, though, claiming the innocence of Cain, but the wickedness is now technically enough that I won’t object to somebody executing them.’
Daniel stared at the theophany, and Ariel asked a question. ‘There won’t be any drawbacks?’
‘None,’ said God.
* * * * *
3 weeks later, Daniel and Ariel armed with handguns, wandered into the Saruvim’s usual hangout bar. All 7 were there.
Satan spoke up. ‘Hey, dudes. Check it out. Lord of the wusses.’ The Saruvim laughed.
Daniel pulled out his guns and so did Ariel. They came forward to the group who didn’t move.
‘Satan. Lord of Evil, fowl, and misdeed. For time beyond reckoning angelicdom, humanity and animal kind have suffered the torments of your evil deeds. So many have suffered, felt sorrow and pain, because you have defiantly and wilfully, time and time again, done your own perverted will, not and never succumbing to the mercies of God to bring you to repentance and the ways of righteousness. God has declared to us that now, in the finality of things, your wickedness has become severe enough. It is judgement day. You have been found guilty. The penalty is death.’
The Saruvim came forward, glaring at Daniel.
Slowly, carefully, Daniel and Ariel raised their guns, pointed them at the Saruvim and said ‘You are guilty. The penalty is death. Judgement has come.’ And then they blazed away.
* * * * *
First, God brought the final spirit essences of the killed Saruvim into a place in Sheol which was reserved for God. There was not much life spirit left in them, and God placed them into a vat of specially designed chemicals which caused enough agonizing pain for the last few hours, that Satan went out in the way so many wished him to – totally fucked, and feeling every last bit of the agony his enemies had wished upon him. And then it was over, done, and complete. The Saruvim – destroyed forever – the death of evil and wickedness.
* * * * *
Samael, in heaven, found about it a few weeks later. The Child of Heaven, who had chosen the role of the Devil, sat in a quiet place in the dark of his abode and felt, in his heart, as if a part of evil that had long lingered there was now gone, dead, and put away eternally. As if the core of wickedness in his heart had finally been dealt with.
He sat there for many a day, many a week, and finally, purchasing a ticket, took himself away on a sabbatical to a monotheistic retreat, and sought out the spirit of God in a spirit of true repentance, and found the peace he had been missing for so long.
* * * * *
Ariel sat with Daniel on their bed in Danielphon. It was over. The torment was over. The agony was over. Evil was finally, irreversibly, irrevocably, eternally, dealt with. Praise God for that. Praise God. Alleluia.
* * * * *
‘So Satan is completely, utterly, eternally dead?’ asked Meludiel, looking squarely at the Theophany of God. ‘Eternally?’
The theophany, sitting in a café stall in one of the greater outer discs of the Realm of Eternity, were Meludiel and Ambriel were living for about 1000 years, munched down on a corned beef sandwich with mustard and tomatoes, chewed away at it, and had a number of mouthfuls. Then he sipped on some Coca Cola, and continued staring at Meludiel.
‘Eternally?’ he finally asked her?’
‘Yes, eternally,’ she responded.
God came clean. ‘Were Satan is, he is learning his lesson. As the Saruvim are. Let me assure you of that. You won’t be bothered by them again for a very, very long time.’
‘Great,’ she said. ‘Well, how long? How much grace do we have?’
‘You know the time you have been alive?’
‘Yes, pretty much. The calendar is pretty accurate in that respect.’
‘Well, pretty much that much time again before you will here from the Saruvim again. By then I expect the fundamental issues to have been dealt with. Oh, they will still likely choose bad boy ways, but they will be more tolerant by then. A bit more understanding about the effect of the things they do. Just a bit more concerned about it all.’
‘You’re sanctifying them?’
‘Only so much. Only as much as I deem necessary for universal harmony. Satan likes his freedom, and I want him to be as happy as he can be, but I understand the impact he can also have on others. It is a juggling act. But when I am finished with him, he will be reasonable enough. He will be a bad boy, but the kind of bad boy which the girls will still like reasonably enough. He won’t be too much for people.’
‘He will be manageable?’ she queried.
‘Yes. He will have to be. You have a personal stake in the issue after all.’
‘How so?’ she queried him.
‘Well. You marry him for a while. He always has fancied you.’
She was almost beside herself. ‘The Devil? Marry the devil? You are kidding aren’t you?’
‘It’s a long eternity, Meludiel. A very, very, very long eternity.’
Meludiel stared at God, and for the first time in a very long time, almost cussed, but thought better of it. Married to Satan. Good grief.
* * * * *
‘So, life just goes on, does it Daniel? It just goes on?’
Daniel stared at Ariel, a little confused. ‘What is that supposed to mean?’
‘Satan. He and the Saruvim. They are dead.’
‘You should know that as well as me.’
‘And will God ever bring them back?’
He picked up the remote, switched off the TV set, and looked at her. ‘Probably. Eventually. He doesn’t destroy eternally, no matter what people might think. Satan is learning his lesson, wherever he is, ok. He is learning his lesson.’
She looked at him squarely, and then acquiesced. In the end, probably. Daniel was probably right. Satan would be back in time, after his repentance was complete – or complete enough. She softened, got up and came and sat down next to her twin, and cuddled him.
‘I do love you, you know, Hakham Daly. I do love you.’
‘Bloody hell. Hakham? I haven’t been a practicing Hakham since – well, it has been a bloody long time, sweetie.’
‘You still have a heart of gold to me,’ she said.
He put his hand in hers, kissed her cheek, and turned on the TV to the Romance channel, and spent the afternoon watching a number of romantic movies.
* * * * *
Talzudiel sat on a bridge corner, on a disc of eternity he had forgotten the name of, in a little world of his own, escaped from the fellowship in many ways, out here, far away from Zaphon, being nothing but Talzudiel. Nothing but himself.
He had fortunes beyond counting, naturally, the sum of a long life with asset investments in various companies, various very successful companies, and his bank account he was currently using, which had regular deposits into it, would naturally last forever. He didn’t have any financial concerns in other words.
His twin, Winoniel, was back in the centre somewhere, possibly waiting for his return, but possibly not. They weren’t currently together or married, from memory, and he was his own man – his free man. And, in finding the life he needed to find at this point in eternity, he lived in a small bed-sitter, with his food delivered from Woolworths delivery service, an automatic delivery every 3 days, and a maid who came in every second day to clean up and sometimes cook for him and take care of his household chores.
People in general knew who he was – people, in general, didn’t really mind.
It was an English speaking city, for the most part, but Spanish was popular in places, which was good news for him personally. And it was vast, so he had been told. At least 400 Trillion residents of this particular metropolis, from recent census figures. A pretty bloody big place.
At the moment, he was about 10 miles from home, down near the local river, the name of which he couldn’t remember, but didn’t care anyway. It was late in the afternoon, the sky had various reddening clouds in the west, a mock of sunset in many ways, and he stared at them, occasionally taking a sip from his Apple Jack, and slowly finishing his burger and chips.
He stared at the sun, and let his mind wander over recent thoughts. Life. The meaning of life. But, for the most part, his experiment with life – finding those routines, those lifestyles, those living patterns, which would work for him. Which would give him meaning. Which would make him happy. And while he craved companionship and company often, at times, he felt, he just needed to be alone. Alone with himself, and whatever higher power wanted to take an interest.
He stared down at the river, thought again about buying that fishing rod and coming down here to have a go, as there were apparently plenty of fish in the thing, and let his mind relax. It was a simple time, a quiet time, and there had been a lot of it for the past million years or so, living here in this city, the name of which he couldn’t even remember most of the time, wandering the local streets of his flat, looking at the houses, the buildings, the everyday life that they were all chasing, and being merry with. Were there others going through the things he was going through? Finding themselves? Working it all out? He guessed, in truth, there probably was. Life was not the exclusive domain of Talzudiel the angel, despite perhaps in his youth thinking it all revolved around him.
A wind blew, and he felt it in his legs, and so stood, finished off his burger and apple jack, and gave the sky a last look.
He turned, found the garbage bin he was used to, for this pattern was well established now, and started making the way back to the main road, perhaps ready to hail a taxi, but he thought on the hotel just down the road a little. If it had a room, perhaps a nice night to get away from the flat.
He walked along, found the ‘Empire Glory’ hotel, came to the pretty receptionist, who took his card, gave him a key, and showed him to the elevator.
The room was swish. It should be, being the presidential one, but hell, he could afford it.
He turned on the television set, and spent half an hour watching Oprah Winfrey. She was amazingly popular still, but the show was almost definitely an old repeat.
And then, after room service of fried chicken and soft drink, he stared at the phone. What the hell – he may as well.
He picked it up, dialled in the necessary connecting numbers, and for the central discs they had priority, and waiting for about 10 rings was about to put it down, when the phone was picked up.
‘Yes,’ said a female voice.
‘It’s me,’ said Talzudiel. ‘I guess, really, I have done enough. I have sort of worked through a lot of what I needed out here. It’s been good. Great, really. But time to come home.’
‘Oh, Tally. That is so good. When do you think you will be here?’
‘Next month some time, Winoniel. I have a few things to take care of, a few friends to say bye to. And then I will be back.’
‘Thank God, dear brother,’ and Winoniel started crying over the phone.
Later on, enjoying some hot chocolate, Talzudiel was suddenly happy. He had served a sentence, in a way – a self imposed sentence, but now it was time to go home. Now it was time to get back to the regular life he had crafted out for himself.
* * * * *
Winoniel, for the past million years, had gotten into something of a routine. She lived in Zaphora currently, near Danielphon of all places, and visited Ariel for the most part, of all her regular visitations, apart from Elenniel, who she made a habit of visiting at least once a year at Pellersphon, the place Elenniel now rarely left.
She sat with Ariel, knitting quite a lot, as well as felting, and playing euchre, which the two ladies enjoyed. They didn’t always talk a lot – at there age, most issues had been discussed, and it was usually simple talk of how have you been, what you and your twin has been up to, if anything, and any current plans for new children, which was a very common and usual topic. Children, for children of the Realm of Eternity, and the other realms of God, were a preoccupation in the sense that you could always have them if you wished. Woman’s eggs would run a course and, not naturally reproduce themselves unless you specifically prayed to God for a replenishment, which would lead to a new supply of eggs being produced within a few years of your prayers. Yet they would only be replenished if you asked him – otherwise you could enjoy your sexual relations without having to worry about such things. This made perfect practical sense to everyone. After a certain point, children became far less a priority, but you would still like them available if you could or desired to at a certain point. But, naturally, full enjoyment of your sexuality was desired by most, and with no eggs to worry about for the majority of the time for most angel and human female, you could enjoy your sexual pleasures with no concerns.
Winoniel, sitting with Ariel that morning, having received a phone call from Talzudiel the night before announcing his return, was discussing with Ariel the idea of a new child to signify the blessing of Talzudiel’s return. Ariel agreed that it was a good idea in principal, but reminded the happy Winoniel that Talzudiel would have to be taken into consideration. Perhaps he had met someone – perhaps he had other ideas – perhaps he didn’t want anymore. But, apart from those concerns, she was happy for her sister’s happiness.
Ariel looked at the felting Winoniel had been working on for the past week, finally noticing what it was. ‘Oh, it’s Noah’s Ark!’ she exclaimed.
‘Yes. Daniel’s design. His original one. I have done it a few times before. He doesn’t mind, as he sought of has copyrights on their production still, but he has welcome me selling them on his website if I want to.’
‘You have financial concerns?’ Ariel asked quickly, but then said ‘Oh, what am I saying. You couldn’t possibly.’
‘Oh, nothing to do with the money, Ariel. You should know that. More of finding a job to give my contribution to the life of eternity. I know, with all the new children replacing all of us on a regular basis, they are understood to do the work for us all, and that has always been the case – till they find themselves and their fortune. But, in the end, I still need something to do – an occupation of sorts, don’t I? I have to fill my eternity somehow.’
‘I would have thought that would have been an issue a long time ago.’
‘It was,’ she responded. ‘But it was Talzudiel. When he left. Working again on his life routines – his preoccupation. Finding out HOW to live. So that is what I have been doing with my felting since he left. Finding out how to live. Finding out routines which work, pastimes which bring blessing and happiness, something useful which people appreciate from me.’
‘And you find that in felting?’ queried Ariel.
‘Very much so.’
Suddenly Daniel, who was listening at the door, just having walked in, spoke. ‘It is what I do also, Ariel. With my felting. I do that Noah’s Ark design a lot, out the back, in the shed. I sell them on the website. Sometimes I auction them, and there are souls in eternity who will pay a very pretty penny for an original Daniel the Seraphim felting I can tell you.’
Ariel laughed. Daniel had said such things about a lot of his works before – how much people were prepared to pay for his name, his products.
‘Which is why I do it,’ responded Winoniel.
Daniel came in, picked up a bottle of whiskey from the cabinet, and poured himself a little glass.
Ariel raised her eyebrow. ‘Alcohol, Daniel? Is this some special celebration?’
‘Uh, Talzudiel coming home. Let’s have a drink to his return. It actually has been quite a while – a million years. Not ages, I know, but a fair whack.’
Ariel shrugged, and as Daniel handed her and Winoniel glasses of grog, they raised them and Daniel said ‘To Talzudiel. May our brother return home with promise and blessing,’ and the other two said ‘Amen.’
* * * * *
Meludiel sat in the café, were God had sat with her a few days earlier, looking at the menu. What to order, what to order. Ambriel appeared shortly, sat down next to her, and picked up one of the other menus. He found the hamburger he liked, with fries, and looked at her. ‘Have you chosen?’
‘A double cheeseburger. And a sprite.’
He went off and ordered them, paid the price, and returned with the drinks. They sat there for a while, in silence, drinking their drinks, not saying much. But it was like that now, at times, not saying much. And it wasn’t an Ambriel thing for Meludiel, nor was it a Meludiel thing for Ambriel – it was the same for both of them, and they had discussed it a lot between them anyway. In a universe of conversations, as strange as it may seem to some, in time, eventually, you sort of ran out of things to say. Things to discuss. Things to show concern about. And, after that point had been reached, it was mostly. ‘Hi. How are you feeling? What did you have for dinner? What was the score in that football match?’ and a host of basic questions on the things which did the very simple thing of being easy enough for conversation, repetitive enough but unique each time, such as a sports score, to make it a suitable thing to talk about, and safe enough to talk freely about. And that, for Meludiel and Ambriel, had been what it had gotten down to. They weren’t bored, though – not exactly. Nor were Elenniel or Michael with there similar relationship. Not boredom – there were always plenty of things to do which made you happy enough in your life routine, as it had come to be called. But it was, just a little, predictable in many ways. There was no great spark for a lot of them anymore – it had all been said, it had all been done. Now they just went with the flow, and lived their life. The great adventure had peaked, and the mundane beckoned them each day now, going through its simple, but tedious, routine.
But, in truth, Ambriel had a lot of things which brought him ample happiness, and Meludiel did not complain in the end either. Life was good enough, when it all came down to it, and she would not really want it any other way.
They sat there, eating their meal, looking at the sports match – a twenty-twenty cricket match between two local countries of the disc they were on – and did not much else.
‘Well, Meludiel. This is our life. Isn’t it. The simple life. The basic life.’
‘It's what we want, isn’t it?’ she responded, sipping on her sprite.
‘I guess so,’ he said, looking up at the match. ‘You know,’ he began. ‘Why don’t we do something with cricket? We are both pretty good at it. Why don’t we dedicate a few million years to this nation – play in their local competitions.’
‘How about indoor cricket,’ she responded positively.
‘Why indoor?’ he asked her curiously.
‘I like it more. To play. It is more fun to play. I was disappointed when we moved because I was involved with a woman’s team which had had a lot of success for a while.’
‘Oh, sorry,’ he responded. ‘Ok. Indoor cricket. Perhaps we form our own team, here in this city. Some of our friends here.’
She stared at the match, and an idea just came to her. ‘Well, why don’t we form our own league, then? Form our own competition. Have a number of new stadiums built, devise our own particular regulations, and run the thing. And we can also play in one of the teams.’
‘Hey, that’s a good idea. Yes, we can definitely afford to launch our own. Money is not a concern.’
‘So let’s do that. I don’t really think we have done that kind of thing much before – launched our own sporting competition. Something new for us. It could prove very grounding for us – something to focus on.’
For the first time, in quite a while, Ambriel was suddenly happy. He had something – something new – something to dig his teeth into, and concentrate on, and find new meaning. And, more than that, the idea appealed to him also.
‘Then let us have some ice cream to celebrate,’ and when Meludiel nodded, he ordered two banana splits with extra cream, and they got a little fatter that day, both somewhat excited by Meludiel’s new idea.
* * * * *
Talzudiel picked up the scrappy looking paperback, stuffed into the back of the seat in front of him, on his flight back to Zaphora. Ironic. It was one of Daniel’s Angels books. But he was popular, still, wasn’t he.
He didn’t recognize the title instantly, but presumed he had read the text when Daniel first wrote out his stories, many a long aeon ago. But, with nothing better to do, and a series of connecting flights which would take a good week to reach Zaphora, he opened it up at the first page, smiled at the opening joke, and settled in for a good read.
* * * * *
‘They are about to launch a new competition. Were they are – a new indoor cricket competition. They are in the process of acquiring land to build stadiums, and advertise for players.’
‘Why?’ Daniel asked Ariel, bemused.
‘She doesn’t say directly. Just sort of hints that they were looking for something useful to do again.’
‘They’re bored,’ Daniel stated flatly. ‘The genius has run out of imagination.’
‘Don’t be like that, Danny. Ambriel is very intelligent.’
‘Ha,’ said Daniel, smiling. ‘He is bored. The messiah of God’s glory, and he is bored shitless.’
‘Well it HAS been a long eternity, brother. Give the guy a break.’
‘Ha,’ said Daniel again, and went off to celebrate his intellectual victory over his brother.
* * * * *
Ambriel looked at the enormous field, on the edge of the city they were currently living in. It housed a small number of fruit trees, being an orchard of sorts, as well as some buzzing bees floating around everywhere. But the owner was happy enough to sell for the right price, and Ambriel and Meludiel were able to offer him the right price.
It was to be the central headquarters of their project – the main place were it was all organized, and finals to be held in. Meludiel had done some web-surfing, found it a few days ago, and yesterday they had purchased. There didn’t really seem to be any point in wasting time about it.
‘Do you want to do the design yourself?’ Meludiel asked him. ‘I know you have several old architecture degrees under your belt, so perhaps you could have a go.’
‘Mmm. No. Maybe not,’ he responded. ‘Skills like that always slip away after a while. You sort of have to stay current, practicing, or it just disappears from your mind. Its how we are made, after all.’
‘Yes. I know,’ she responded. ‘But if you used your instincts, you would get a good job of it done.’
He looked over the field and nodded to her. ‘I will do some basics. On drafting paper. And then we’ll find a suitable architect and let him or her run with the project.’
‘Suits me,’ she responded.
Bees buzzed around them momentarily, perhaps suspicious of the newcomers, and Meludiel turned to Ambriel. ‘Now. Do we have a team name?’
‘How about ‘Magnetic’ responded Ambriel.’
Meludiel smiled. ‘An interesting choice. Because of our magnetic personalities, I take it?’
‘What else could it possibly be,’ he responded smiling.
‘Then ‘Magnetic’ it is. Now we just need team members.’
‘All things in their time and place, dear Melly. All things in their time and place.’
They stared at the fields for a while longer and, satisfied, made their way back to the car, started for home, and dreamed about their new occupations for the foreseeable future. Something old in many ways, but something new in its own way. And at least they wouldn’t be bored – not for a while, anyway.
* * * * *
The book had been a good read – all 474 pages of it – and the ending was different to what he had thought it would be, but a good thriller in the end and the demon ‘Hex’ really was a chilling invention of Daniel’s.
Talzudiel opened the window cover on his seat and looked outwards. It was dark, but looking downwards he could see lights flicker here and there. That was only to be expected – he was halfway home, and the further inwards you went the more congested life was, unlike out at the distant rim areas, were life was still and ever sparse. But that was par for the course as the rim continued expanding with new population.
Talzudiel sat there, looking into space. He wasn’t really tired – not really, but dinner had been a couple of hours ago, and he had finished his book, not taking much with him for the flight home. His mind wandered. Routines – that was the name of the game he had been on – filling his life with routines, and finding out what worked for him. The solitary life – solo time – gave him strength. When he was away, and putting up with a lack of his closest friends, it made him stronger in the end, more capable of handling real life, more capable of sorting things out by himself. But that was probably a truth of human nature, and nothing unique to the Seraphim Talzudiel. Yet, he could not go on with his solo lifestyle forever – who could? It was a very brave soul who was the true hermit, and Talzudiel doubted the authenticity of any eternal claimants to such a role. Any he knew of anyway. Except God, perhaps. Perhaps God had put up with that, before everyone else had come to be. But that was a deep mystery and, besides, God had companions now. Even he needed to love, and to be loved.
Perhaps that was, still, the greatest of all mysteries. Perhaps it all came down to that – love. To find people to connect to and to show the respect, kindness and affection – to love them. And in the loving of them and being loved, happiness and true solace of the soul was found – that much was obvious to him now – and in these loves of life, true peace and joy of the eternal could be found. So why the fascination with solo time? Perhaps, it was a time to sort him out – perhaps it was a time to escape from other pressures in life – or perhaps it was just a time for self reflection and, that other quality of love – self love. A time to learn about oneself and fully appreciate the wonderful child of God that the heavenly father had fashioned, and what it was to be alive, knowing oneself intimately, amongst a universal community.
His mind wandered over these ideas and, honestly, he couldn’t really say if he’d thought these things, perhaps, a thousand times before anyway. But, as a steward came forward, asked if he wanted a late supper of an orange juice and an apple pie, he nodded and, starting to consume his meal, a little happier with something to do for a while, he put on his earphones, listened to the in flight entertainment, and returned to the world of Talzudiel, child, angel and loved one of God the Almighty Father.
* * * * *
Daniel twirled the cricket ball again and again over his fingers, spinning it, and ready to give it a whirl in the back yard of Danielphon on the back cricket pitch. He had been here for about 20 minutes and Ariel had just wandered out and was looking at him.
‘Cricket, Daniel? Has Ambriel and Meludiel’s decision sparked an interest?’
Daniel said nothing, but ran in to the pitch, let the ball go, and it spun in the air, hitting the ground, and rebounding right into the stumps.
‘I still have it,’ he said confidently to himself.
Ariel watched him for a while, sitting down on the grass, and he had a number of yellow balls which he spun time and time again, nearly always hitting the stump. He really was quite accurate, as testimony to his former glory days in the sport.
Ariel looked at the balls and suddenly made a connection. ‘Those are yellow balls.’
‘Your point?’ he responded.
‘Those are the ones used in indoor cricket. Not the outdoor kind.’
‘Your observations are impeccable,’ responded the 45th of the male Seraphim.
Ariel nodded. ‘Well, I have a conclusion of such. You are getting ready to enter their competition, aren’t you?’
He continued on with the next ball, which again hit the stumps, and turned to look at her. ‘Ariel, Ariel, Ariel. We have been through so many adventures together, haven’t we?’
‘Right. You want me on your team. To compete with Ambriel and Meludiel. I see right through you, Daniel Daly. Right through you.’
Daniel smiled, and ran in again, again hitting the stumps.
‘So you’ll play?’ he asked, turning to her.
She almost said no, quite used to Daniel’s pride, but decided, once again, to suffer the beast. ‘Oh, alright. Have it your way. But don’t go on bragging if you beat him. How about a little humility, Angel Daniel.’
‘Humility, right. Yeah, gotya,’ said Daniel, waltzing in, releasing the ball, which again spun right into the stumps.
Ariel smiled, looked at him in his own little world and going back inside said to herself. ‘He is incorrigible, isn’t he?’
And perhaps a little birdie agreed.
* * * * *
The theophany sat in the café were Meludiel and Ambriel frequented a lot for their meals, thinking on life. Talzudiel was on his mind, at the moment. A good lad, working through routines. How to live. How to be happy with it all. A very wise lad to still concentrate on those ideas at his age, as it would rekindle the basics and give him strength. He was, still, growing up. Learning about eternal life.
But, there was another thing on his mind, an upcoming confrontation, a confrontation of quite supreme egos, with a rivalry as ancient as days. Daniel and Ambriel – ego vs ego – Arch-Regent Vs Messiah – the contest of glory, over which they would each wager a full bloody half of their wealth. The theophany rarely thought in swear words, but for the fact of wagering half their wealth, over the aeons of time in which they had accumulated it, they were brave men indeed, which warranted a little swear.
Indoor cricket – a game they both cherished and loved – a game of pride for Daniel and his English ways, a game of joy for Ambriel who loved the close contests. Picking a winner out of these two could be a great challenge indeed. Who would win? Who would triumph? Who would overcome, well, funnily enough, only time would tell – as it had always, in fact, done so.
‘Caught in a hazy world of unbelief. Caught in a hazy world of drunken madness, soul destroying malevolence – almost evil – but pretending to be paragons of virtue. Caught in a world of Antichrists and False Prophets and devils and delusion – and false saints, and carnal sinners. Caught in hell itself, beyond the most divine powers redemptive capabilities.’
The audience hushed, waiting for the next lines in the play.
‘Yet, in this malevolent darkness of the soul – the darkness of my own creation – lost in the depression of the dark heart of hatred, I found a light. A little, faint light, of hope – the hope of promise that, in the end, no matter how far you stray from the light, no matter how much you reject goodness, no matter how much you let the appeal of sin dominate your very being – goodness remains.
And so I found that light, and in the dim afternoons of my soul’s discontent, I nurtured her, day after day, week after week, until I found the salvation she promised, and once again returned to the land of the living.’
The soliloquy ended, and the audience rose to its feet, clapping wildly. The acting had been dramatic, to say the least.
Later on, Talzudiel sat with Winoniel at one of the downstairs cafeteria seats, after the play, sipping on coffees, eating cake, discussing their son’s accomplishments. The Seraphim Charles, Talzudiel and Winoniel’s son of only a few million years of age, who had turned to acting, had been the lead actor in the play, and they were both very, very proud of him.
‘He has improved something shocking,’ said Talzudiel.
‘He has kept at it for quite a while, and this play he has been concentrating on. It was written by himself a number of other actors and screenplay writers. A few of them were in the play. It is a standard, at the moment. The Zaphoran community have been eating it up for the last few hundred thousand years, and ticket sales show no sign of diminishing yet. They are always performing to a sold out audience.’
‘Is he investing wisely? I have always insisted that our children earn their keep, Winoniel – you know that. They get an inheritance of shares, but can work for our companies if they need to.’
‘But you always like to see if they can make it on their own,’ she responded.
‘That is exactly the case. To get along eternally you need to learn how to be self sufficient. It is just the way of things.’
‘But you will always be there for Charles. And our others. Don’t be so hard, Tally. Be a loving father, like God is for you.’
Talzudiel nodded, and responded softly. ‘Yes. That is true.’
They finished their coffees, and Charles waved to them from a little way off were he was seated with some of his friends.
‘I can only hope he perseveres with his trade,’ responded Talzudiel. ‘Every year he will gain a good reputation for his work. It will help him no end in the long term.’
‘Charles is a sensible lad. He is just like his father,’ she responded, gazing at Charles, putting her hand in Talzudiel’s.
They both stared at their son affectionately, pleased with his success. It was good to know your children could make it on their own, and didn’t always need to rely on you. It gave you a sense of pride, a sense of accomplishment – that you had taught them properly. And for someone like Talzudiel, eternally focused on success, such things were of prime importance. That was how life worked in the end after all, wasn’t it.
* * * * *
Ambriel picked up the bat and looked at it. A ‘Daniel the Seraphim Special Mark 12.’ One of 45 in his special series – very typical for Daniel. Ambriel liked the ‘12’ the most. It had the balance he personally preferred of all the ‘Special’ series, perhaps even more than the exuberant ‘45’ which was one of the most highly prized cricket bats in existence. But, as a son of Israel, father of the 12 tribes, Ambriel used the special series ‘12’ bat, usually, and jibed Daniel that the ’12’ was the one which kicked arse. Apparently Daniel used all 45 of them from time to time, as well as the various others in his ‘45’ series of cricket equipment, such as balls, pads, helmets and so on. But that was Daniel – he loved his ‘45’s’.
Naturally, there was a heck of a lot of competition in the cricketing world for supplies – a literal googol of suppliers were likely out there these days, especially from the various Asian Indian empires, who were specialists in affordable production of such stuff. ‘Arjuna’, which was an Indian word for ‘Dragon’ was an incredibly popular supplier, and seemed to dominate everywhere from what Ambriel had seen, yet ‘Tendulkar’ was also an enormous brand, founded by ‘Sachin Tendulkar’, the famous Indian cricket player from earth from the 20th and 21st centuries. There were still traditional giants in the game like ‘Kookaburra’ and ‘Slazenger’ and ‘Nike’ and so on, which never went away, but there were a bevy of other competitors who had been in the business for literally aeons and, so it seemed in cricketing circles, everyone had a particular favourite bat or helmet or other item.
Ambriel mostly used his Seraphim brother Daniel’s products, as Daniel was the main Seraphim angel who took an interest in the game amongst the original 70 Seraphim, although Sariel also was a keen player as well. Daniel, though, had a company which produced various cricketing items, and while they had been designed a long time ago, he never changed the way he produced the item, and funnily enough they had lasted, despite improvements in products from his competitors. Some believed and taught in cricketing circles that Daniel’s technology had been so advanced that he had gotten the job done, possibly perfectly, the first time, and that now there was nowhere really left to go for him, apart from settling on his standard 45 designs, and sticking with them. Ambriel admired Daniel for his stability and endurance in this sense, and used the ‘12’ bat religiously.
Of course, in Indoor cricket he used the special variant for the indoor game, which was the current bat he had in his hands, the ‘12’ also.
It had been a patient year and a half for Ambriel and Meludiel, as they had secured land around the city, and had there stadiums built. Today, the main stadium and headquarters for the competition, had been finished for a little over 2 weeks, and most of the fittings and equipment was now in place. Finishing touches remained.
They had already employed a crew of just over 1000 around the city for their work, and with 60 established centres, Ambriel deciding to follow Daniel’s traditional ways and utilizing his own Seraphim birth number amongst the males, things were starting to look promising. They had advertised last month in various media outlets, and had a good response so far – certainly enough to found 2 grades, and probably 3 at this stage. Meludiel had been the driving force behind the rules for the games, and while they followed the standard conventions for the way the game was to be played, there were still certain modifications here and there, things which Meludiel deemed proper for the way and attitude they wished to bring to their own particular competition.
He went through the mesh gate, going down to the batting end, and standing in front of the wickets, started practicing his batting thrusts. He’d been there for about 5 minutes, working on his technique, when Meludiel appeared, came into the nets with a piece of paper, and handed to him.
‘What’s this?’ he asked.
She smiled. ‘You’ll never believe it. It’s an email from someone we know.’
Ambriel nodded, opened the paper, and started reading.
‘Hello Schmuk. I hear you are looking for players for your kindergarten league. I have some free time at the moment, so don’t worry about begging me to join – I will be there in a few weeks. Don’t start the competition without me – but you wouldn’t do that, would you. Your bro, Daniel.’
Ambriel smiled, handed the paper back to Meludiel and, as she walked away he said ‘Will life ever be the same again with that devil in the competition.’
Meludiel smiled, but said nothing, and as she walked away, Ambriel returning to his stroke-play, he just shook his head, smiled, and wondered just what destiny had in store for him.
* * * * *
Daniel was out the back of Danielphon, at the north-west quadrant of the place. Danielphon was quite a big place in comparison to his neighbours, the size of a few standard bungalow blocks in the sector of Zaphora were he mostly resided. It was true, Daniel did have a number of places in Zaphon tower which he owned, yet he usually rented these out, apart from one place which he and Ariel would stay in when they were visiting. But Danielphon had been founded a long time ago for the purposes of his own space and place within Zaphora, and now, for the most part, this was where he resided.
As Arch-Regent of the Realm of Eternity there were duties which he could get to, if he desired, but for the most of the last several millions of years those duties had been delegated to various authorities. Danielphora was the seat of the Arch-Regency, but Daniel now, even despite his early ambitions of youth to make a name for himself, along with the travails of Valandriel, was mostly over such ambitions. Sure, he never regretted the claiming of such glory when it finally arrived, but life for Daniel the Seraphim was mainly about simple things, here in Danielphon, and, funnily enough, despite early meanderings to this and that lass, primarily Sharlamane and Meludiel, he mostly stuck with Ariel now – simply because she mostly stuck with him. He’d had numerous love affairs with many of the female Seraphim and Cherubim, when they were apart from their twin or others at times, but they were the lustings of youth, he now felt. He was horribly stable these days, grounded on Torah for his morals, and not really looking to change anymore. Not really looking for anything else, in fact, and content with spending most of eternity with Ariel, despite a part of him which still suggested, on rare occasions, something different to spice up life a little. But only on rare occasions.
Ariel’s, his sister, whose human name was Keri-Anne Noble, had stuck with Daniel for a long, long time now, and expressed no desire for things to change. They were together, an item, and he found his necessary peace and partnership desires happily enough in his twin. Meludiel always beckoned to his heart, for he found her constantly attractive, and others of the female Seraphim, like Aquariel and Nimorel, as well as Luladiel and others, he still remained friendly with and knew he would never really stop loving or desiring to be around. But Ariel satisfied him, and that is were he left it.
Today, in the back north-west section, were he had his sports shed, he was looking through his collection of cricket bats. He was deciding, of all of them, which one to take with him on his soon journey to Ambriel’s city. The 45 always beckoned, but now he wanted to do something new, and was looking at the 13 and the 15. Picking up the 15 indoor special, he did some batting practice, and nodded to himself. Yep, this was the one. This one should do perfectly. The bats were replaced regularly, as long as they in fact lasted without being played, as he didn’t play cricket a great deal in the last while, but, while they would generally stay the same when left untouched, even for a very long time, damp and mist inevitably wore them down, unless they had been specifically stored for archival purposes, which he didn’t bother with for his current equipment.
The current shed had all be refitted with new items just last week, as he had ordered his local company to restock him with the standard order, and thrusting the 15 in front of him he thought on something which had just entered his mind. An offer – a wager – a bet. A very simple thing. But this one of incredible proportions – half their wealth. If Ambriel was willing, then Daniel would wager half his own wealth versus half of Ambriel’s – an incredible amount given his vast age and accumulation of assets over such a long time – but what was life without a bit of interest and a bit of risk. Boring, in the end. So he nodded to the idea, very knowledgeable of the fact that he could lose, and continued with his batting practice, ready for a new challenge.
* * * * *
Talzudiel sat in his study, looking over his emails. Naturally, as par for the course, he had a standard ‘Everybody Email Account’ which was a public email account reserved for anyone who wanted to contact him. It had been made available aeons ago, in fact back in the first phase of their existence, before all the rests, when the Realm of Eternity had been new. And, in point of very fact, the emails he was currently answering were still from that era – with the vast population that the realm had risen to, you could hardly expect a figure as popular as Talzudiel to be able to answer emails any time soon, but that was naturally par for the course. Mostly, he had a routine of getting to a few emails every week or so as part of his standard routines, and what was interesting is that in front of him he had just opened a standard email from Seraphim Daniel, of all people, who had occasionally sent emails to a bulk list which had included Talzudiel’s general email address. It was advertising his new cricket bat – the Daniel the Seraphim Special Mark 4. Boy, this was an old email.
Of course, Winoniel had mentioned to him recently how Daniel and Ariel were about to travel to were Ambriel and Meludiel currently resided for Daniel to take part in an Indoor cricketing competition, apparently run by Ambriel and Meludiel. Talzudiel thought on this. His sport, traditionally, was soccer. But he loved cricket as well. Perhaps, with nothing particular to hold him here in Zaphora at the moment, perhaps he could do it. Travel out, enjoy some indoor cricket for a while. He looked at the email, put it into one of his thousands of folders, and went off to chat with Winoniel about a change of current plans. Yes, he had made up his mind. Time for some competition – time to once again engage in a serious way with his brothers in a game of life. After all, that was a big part of life, wasn’t it – the competition.
Winoniel agreed, and coming back to the PC he opened ‘Air Eternity’ airlines, which was the standard airline he used, made his booking for a month from that day, and smiled to himself as he envisaged defeating his two dear brothers in the competition they both prided themselves in.
* * *
Ambriel addressed his team. ‘Teamwork, buddies. Stick together. Be there for each other. Pull together. Daniel’s team look great, but with a little faith, hope and love, I know you will all pull through. And praise God.’ And the team all gave each other a big group hug.
Over on the other side of the pitch Daniel addressed his teammates, his moustache done up in a very ‘English Major’ fashion, and the accent quite obvious. ‘You are all scum,’ he said with obvious wrath. ‘The lot of you. Scum. My dear old mother, with one arm tied behind her back, would still outscore you all. In fact, with no arms she would bowl better.’
There was a chuckle from the group, but Daniel quickly yelled ‘Silence.’
‘Now, before we go out there and you embarrass me, and there is no greater crime under all the heavens than embarrassing the grand and great Arch-Regent of Eternity, remember, despite your status as scum, which you all are, you are my nephews. Brother Matthews recent spate of bastards. And indeed, I know full well your bastardly state. Matt never was a man of honour.’ Again smirks.
‘Now, scum bags. I know you are not actually idiots – Matt was always a finicky bastard with his facts – so go out, and bowl out these drab and pathetic Ambriel worshippers, Kapiche.’
Later on, after the match, a tight result, with Ambriel’s Heroes defeating Daniel’s Dastards by 1 run, there was happiness in the bar anyway. Matt’s kids were chatting with there dad Matthew, Daniel’s brother, and although they were all under 21, the team of 6 boys and 1 girl were a happy enough lot, and far from being actual scum. 1 win to Ambriel. 6 matches to go.
* * *
‘Ok, Tally. We’ll cut you in. But remember, HALF your kingdom if you lose, to the winner. HALF. Your whole life earnings till this point.’ Talzudiel nodded. It was worth it.
* * *
Matches came and went, and Ambriel’s team got to a 3 nil lead over Daniel’s before Daniel finally got down and gave some serious training points to Matts kids on some of their deficiencies. The improvements were obvious. They won the next three. Talzudiel, despite his brave effort, last all but one match, and that to Ambriel’s team, and he ended up sighing over his soon potential lost earnings. He would have to put his hope on a miraculous draw.
Daniel looked at Ambriel. His brother was going to spin this one, and had already indicated as such. He needed a six to win, a four to tie. The final ball. It came down to this.
‘No, no, no Talzudiel. Ambriel and I have agreed – we get half of your kingdom divided equally between us. We drew.’
‘But the agreement, verbally, was only to the winner. I have a clear case.’
Daniel shook his head, but Ambriel spoke up. ‘Look, Dan. Do we want to do that to Talzudiel anyway? We don’t need his money. We never did. It is just a rivalry between us. It is just for fun, bro.’
Daniel sighed. ‘Point taken, Amby Wamby. I don’t care about the cash. I’ve got plenty. It is a matter of honour. I just want the right judgement.’ He looked at Talzudiel. ‘I think I know, though, that after all my troubles in my long life. After all the shit I have been through, and all the debates. After all the judgements, and all the trials and tribulations, that without some grace, we just won’t get along. Neither of us is really right, tally. Neither of us is really wrong. So I’ll let it go. You’re my bro.’
And Ambriel smiled.
The soft wind blew over home. Michael and Saruviel were chatting, playing chess. Metatron was out in the fields, sitting there, drinking applejack, talking with the theophany. Ambriel and Daniel and Meludiel and Ariel were playing touch footie against Samael and Aphrayel and Sandalphon and Gemrayel. Cosadriel and Azrael were arguing. Nobody minded.
Britney and Justin had worked things out. Gabriel and Aquariel were sitting on a swing. Logos was inside with Memra and Paul and Jesus, playing scrabble.
Cheryl and William were in the barn, making passionate love together.
Wormdog was looking at God’s coin collection in the living room.
Lucy, Shelandragh, Darren and Madalene and Jayden and Georgia were playing videogames in the main room.
Voldemort was arguing with Harry.
Raphael and Nimorel were chatting over by the wishing well. A number of Seraphim were with them.
Jan Kolby and Chance Kibb’Starr were with Dak Bluddhook, not far from Metatron and God, sitting there, chatting, watching the aurora.
Adam and Eve were sitting beneath the tree of life.
Satan finally ate a piece of the apple.
A soft wind blew over home. All was well. All was well.
‘Morning Stars of Glory: Melanie’
‘The Morning Stars of Glory,’ said the angel Melanie, a cherubim angel of the Realm of Eternity. ‘That is what we all are Melaniel. The Morning Stars of Glory.’
Scary Spice looked at Sporty Spice and smiled. ‘Really? The Morning Stars of Glory?’
‘Yes. That sounds right said Geri ‘Gloryel’ Halliwell,’ not taking her eyes off the T20 cricket match on the television set.
‘A Great title,’ said Hugh ‘Sariel’ Grant, seated next to his beloved Geri Girl, the angel of his dreams, and twin angel amongst the Seraphim of the Realm of Eternity.
The Apostle Paul, the Seraphim Angel Yomiel, came and sat down next to his twin Melaniel, and hugged her. ‘I love you babe,’ he said.
‘You just like me coz I’m hot,’ she said, disinterestedly. ‘All men are like that. Even you.’
‘Oh, Paul is alright,’ said Victoria, the Cherubim Victoria, of the Realm of Eternity. ‘He is a loving guy, deep down.’
‘Probably,’ said Emma, chiming in on the conversation, over in the corner with her twin Jovius, playing on the Sega Megadrive, the game being Sonic the Hedgehog 312.
Daniel walked in the room with his twin Ariel.
‘Here comes the devil,’ said Gloryel. ‘The master of hearts, in his own vain imagination.’
‘Oooh, so harsh Glory girl,’ responded Daniel.
‘The fidelity of a slug,’ said Melanie, not looking at her man directly.
‘Oh. I am faithful,’ responded Daniel. ‘But I am well aware of your twins, and the affairs of the heart are always complicated on such an issue.’
Tom Starr didn’t say anything, seated at the desk. Laquenta was like that, usually. Quiet. It is what Melanie valued in her man. It is why she loved him so.
Ariel sat down next to Meludiel on the other couch, who was knitting a scarf, blue and white, for Daniel. He needed his bulldog’s scarves. ‘For Daniel?’ she queried. Meludiel nodded.
Ambriel entered the room, and Gloryel stood, came over and kissed him on the cheek, and said ‘Hello handsome. You’re early. The party doesn’t start until 8.’
‘I thought I’d come now. Finished with the things I was doing at home. Is Mega Risk on for later in the night.’
‘It better be,’ said David Beckham, coming into the room. ‘I am going to kick your arse Amby Wamby after all.’
Victoria smiled. David always got competitive with David.
Later on that evening, about 40 or so guests had arrived at Danielphon, were the party was being held. Ariel, the current owner of the establishment, having purchased it from Meludiel for several Googleplexianites of Realm Credits, was in good spirits. Her oldest friends – most of them – her most treasured brothers and sisters, were present. The spirit was good. The feeling was good. Good times, which never did end in the end, full of life, love and fresh wit. Full of good things. Full of happy things.
And then Satan walked in the door, with Saruviel following, and the other Saruvim one by one, and their chicks. And they had beer. And Ariel was pissed off. And Satan said ‘Lighten up babe. The party has arrived. Now let us put on Metallica and get shitfaced.’ And Ariel almost swore.
* * * * *
‘I love you. I love you not.’
‘Oh, Jovius,’ responded Emma. ‘Will you ever make up your mind?’
‘Probably not babe,’ he said, lighting another cigarette.
‘You know, this realm of eternity is pretty swish, all things considered. Different from our heaven, but I don’t mind it.’
‘You don’t remember, do you?’ asked Emma to her twin.
He looked at her strangely. ‘Remember what?’ he asked her.
‘You and I. We were from here. A long, long time ago. Back in the beginning of all things. It is were our journey began. Were it all began.’
He looked at her, a puzzled expression on his face, but nodded after a while. ‘Sure babe, I believe you.’
‘Oh, Jovius,’ she responded.
Jovius scratched his head, and looked out over the city of Zaphona. The two of them were on an upper level of Zaphon tower, up quite high, looking out over the realm of eternity. They had been here, now, quite a while, since the resurrection to new life of their realm of heaven, were Emma and Jovius had been resting, way up high above them, up far above the Realm of Infinity, up far above the 7 Heavens of the Children of Heaven, and above home, and further still. Of course, above home was another heaven, were Gabriel was firstborn. And then up further still the Eternal Realm of Glory, as it was called, were Raphael was firstborn. Further still lay another Realm of Splendour, very similar to the one down below paradise, but different as well – unique. And above that, the Infinite Realm of Majesty, were Melaniel and Yomiel had been resurrected from. And then, finally, Jovius and Emma’s heaven, were Phanuel was firstborn, up above the Realm of Majesty, which Raguel had been firstborn of. That, so he understood, was the apparent limit, but last weekend, when the party had been on, he had been chatting with the Saruviel fellow, and he talked of a series of connected universes – a Megaverse – even further up still, were his glory was apparent. The highest of the 7 – right at the top.
But here they were again, apparently, from what Emma had said. The Children of Destiny – in the First of the True 7 Heavens. Were Michael was firstborn – sort of – apart from that fellow Metatron, who Jovius had taken an instant liking to. A fellow who knew how to smoke cigarettes, and drink beer, and not give him a bloody lecture like that Daniel fellow.
Jovius blew on his cigarette, said ‘Fuck Daniel,’ to the wind, and turned to his twin.
‘You’re a babe, Em.’
And she smiled.
* * * * *
‘What is the 45th realm then, oh wise one,’ said Ariel to her twin Daniel, in a slight mocking tone.
‘Pagan central, babe – but the Realm of Understanding rules even them. Were the Earth Mother thinks she is a bloody goddess.’
‘Really,,’ replied Ariel, a curious look on her face.
‘Yep. Really, babe,’ responded Daniel, and stared out at Zaphon, a level above Jovius and Emma who were down one level, and a few levels higher than the main group, who were still partying on the sabbath afternoon party which Satan had arranged.
‘And when did this 45th realm come to be?’ Ariel asked him, not sure about the look on his face, still doubting.
‘In the heart and plans, and perhaps even the reality of God,’ dear, dear twin of mine. But that would be telling if I told you any more.’
‘Indeed,’ she responded, giving her twin an even Curiouser look.
* * * * *
Satan, in his long years, had mastered the fine art of – well – putting it bluntly, evil. Yet, even the dark lord, when coming up against the persistent throb of life of the eternal one, a life which rebuked evil so that it would learn its lesson and repent of its carnal ways, had no real chance of long term success. The party would only go on for so long, in other words. For only so young.
‘But fuck it,’ Satan thought to himself. ‘He was still young – in eternal years – so would have some fun. There was chick – his adversary, the Rothchild’s – chick. She looked ok. In fact, in truth, he liked her somewhat. He would score her. He would steal the Messiah’s glory. He would do the wild thing with miss up her butt on Jesus fucking Christ. He would score his babe.
Rebecca St James – the angel Meludiel – was currently married to her first husband, Jacob Fink. But a divorce had just about been ready for signature, when she came to her front door, found the devil standing there, smiling at her, and asking if she wanted to go out on a date. ‘I’m married,’ she instantly replied.
‘So divorce him,’ said the Devil.
She looked at him, and nodded. God had warned her about this. A long time ago. That she would marry the devil. And even now, after an age long fight to keep faith in holiness, a battle she was losing, the devil was finally starting to look attractive. How far she had fallen indeed.
4 months later Satan and Meludiel were dating – Ambriel didn’t mind, Daniel laughed and nobody else seemed to give the slightest. Such was life. They were older now, they’d seen it all, nothing surprised people much anymore. Nothing, really.
‘They are roses,’ said Satan.
‘Oh, they’re lovely,’ said Meludiel.
‘Can I come in,’ he said, very respectfully.
‘Sure,’ she said.
They sat in the living room, quiet for some time, and he was starting to look over her, aroused at her good looks.
‘You are thinking of sex, are you not?’ she queried him.
He didn’t reply.
‘Well, I must let you know that I am a good girl, Lord of the Dark. I don’t fornicate. Only in marriage. Only in the wedding bed.’
‘Then marry me,’ he replied.
She didn’t say anything.
‘Go on. Marry me. I’m older now. The rebellion was something of my youth. I’m a changed guy. I’m different.’
‘How can I trust you?’ she asked him.
‘You probably can’t. But what is life without a risk, huh? What is life without a risk?’
She thought on that, and replied honestly. ‘A lot safer, a lot more stable, a lot more predictable.’
‘And a lot more fucking boring,’ he replied with the traditional brutal honesty of the Devil.
‘True,’ she said softly, not looking at him.
‘Then what do you say?’ he asked her.
‘Give me time to think about it.’
‘Ok,’ he replied.
For the next few hours they watched some gardening shows, and out the back of her current abode they did some gardening, while listening to some Salieri classical music. Satan, surprisingly, was the perfect gentleman. He was quite a man.
14 months later they were married. It was a small wedding. Michael, Elenniel, Gabriel and Aquariel were present, as well as the Saruvim. Nobody else came. Nobody else bothered. Daniel, though, did show at the reception, kissed her, wished her luck, and gave them some lovely presents. She was thankful that he showed then. Ambriel found them both later on outside, when they were going off on their honeymoon, and he shook Satan’s hand, and wished them good luck. Meludiel smiled at him. ‘Here goes,’ she said to him. He smiled back at her.
* * * * *
Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bloody bored.
To put it mildly, Daniel was bored.
The spark had gone out of his life. Meludiel had married the devil. Ariel was currently engaged in theology which taught that the twin was a support, a tower a strength, a sibling as a rocky foundation in troubled times, anything at all except the most obvious – a lover and a partner. The Torah of Israel, so she claimed, made it abundantly clear – brothers didn’t go with sisters. ‘Then who the hell did Cain and Abel fuck?’ was his proud retort. Ariel didn’t comment.
So off she had gone on her crusade, kicked Daniel out of his own home Danielphon, where he was apparently guaranteed a right to live in their verbal codes of honour – which then put within Daniel the notion ‘Get the bitch on legal contracts, and make sure they are fucking watertight, or you are up the duff. And time to start considering those fucking prenuptials.’ He mentioned this, in spiteful tones, to Ariel. She was not impressed.
But, for now, Daniel was bored shitless. In his abode, in Zaphon tower, right up near the top, in a penthouse suite he had paid for untold aeons ago, with all his stuff shoved in the 7 large bedrooms, cramming in the riches of Danielphon – just – he was well and suitably ready for anything, because Mel was gone, life had no current direction in his mind or plans, and Ariel was snubbing him.
And then the name ‘Sharlamane’ entered his head, and he smiled, and looked for his little black book and his old, faithful, squeeze.
* * * * *
Sharlamane, engaged in belly-dancing, with her current Egyptian boyfriend watching intently (possibly with his pants down and doing the obvious things with his manhood), went to the door, screamed a scream of sheer delight, and told her new boyfriend, quite quickly, the affair had reached its climax – literally – and it was time to move on. He noticed Daniel. Mr Sharaf did not complain.
4 hours later, Daniel enjoying the movements of Sharlamane’s currently quite trim physique in her erotic Mizraimite movements, Daniel had urges in his nether regions. And, for the next while, the boredom had disappeared, in the arms of a faithful cherubim, girlfriend, and the spite towards Ariel, and the jealousies of the devil were, for the moment, forgotten. And the sex was bloody good.
* * * * *
Satan looked at his woman’s vagina. It was looking good. Time to dive in. He tongued away, and soon, the moaning became very apparent, and the horn of the devil engaged in a thrusting of magnificent delight, and the ecstasy of darkness thrust away, climaxed in power, and a little seed found its way to its eternal mate, and a child began forming in the halls of Kalphon, a firstborn child, who would one day rise up, challenge the authority of Saruviel himself, and let the world know that a ‘REAL’ firstborn son of Kalphon had truly arrived.
The romance was good after that. The old devil had finally, after aeons of aggravation, borne the seed of his works in the form of the growing lump of Mel’s belly, and he finally was tasting some of the more normal things in life which for so long he had absconded from. And even the bible now looked interesting.
Meludiel was the first to notice the change in her man. The old Devil – had – died. He no longer paid her the flattering types of comments she had been used to for a while. Not at all. Instead he hung around her, kissed her shoulder, kissed her cheek, and brought her flowers. And his soft, gentle words, were filled with a passion that Ambriel did not know, and that Daniel had only hinted at.
She was soon in very love, and her fathers promise was fulfilled.
And then young Saruviel Satan Semyaza Luciferious was born, and the dark one had triumphed.
* * * * *
The angel poked its head in, the tiny little faerie angel, who was wont to visit all sorts of people on God’s business, found Sharlamane breathing heavily on the table, noticed Daniel holding her hand as faithfully as possible, and wandered up to her ear. ‘Tis a grand child in your womb, ready to be borne, dear, dear Sharlamane. His name shall be magnificente and truly wonderful, and he shall rule faire Zaphon with wisdom and justice from now unto eternity. But the firstborn of Kalphon shall be adversarial eternally so,’ the angel finished, the last sentence in softer, softer tones, for Sharlamane to just barely, possibly, grasp. And then the labour pains came, and the angels words were forgotten.
* * * * *
Callodyn Gabriel Daniel Daly was born, to the Joys of Sharlamane, a proud mother, and Daniel the Seraphim, a proud father, a child of great vision, and true passion.
Yet his adversary was already 2 years old, currently arguing in true hostility with his mother Meludiel, about every fucking thing Meludiel once exasperated to her man, to which the Devil would only shrug, ask for another bloody beer, and continue watching the baseball.
Meludiel was not impressed.
As the children grew over the next 18 years, they grew in popularity, sex appeal with the ladies, and growing fame for certain particular attributes – namely sarcasm. Extreme bloody sarcasm, as the theophany was wont to note in his conversations with Metatron on the subject.
But such was life – they were children of Destiny – and life would never be the same again – literally.
The Morning Stars of Glory – Melanie and Melaniel, otherwise known as Melanie C and Mel B respectively, of Spice Girls fame – were in the studies, working on a new album, funnily enough titled ‘The Morning Stars of Glory’. Under the band name Melanie2, the two Mel’s new album was 10 tracks down, with a planned 5 more in the works. And then at least 20 odd remixes for the CD singles and the Remix Album.
These two Spice Girls were hardworking lasses, like all Spice Girls were, and they had desired on their new album to bring a spirit of professionalism and attention to detail to their work. A work which would, hopefully, be critically received, yet with a pop groove fascination, for which they were still quite famous, which would fill the dance floors and get people a rocking and a bopping. They had high hopes.
Tom hung around for most of the recording. He never left Melanie C much these days. There several children together, and the fact they had divorced rarely, were strong indicators to each other that they were eternally destined to each others arms and company. Laquenta, with his Spanish fascinations, was particularly drawn to Gloryel, who had a penchant for Spanish things as well, and through that he had gradually become close and intimate with all the Spice Girls and was a recognized ‘Spice Boy’ at heart. ‘Just like David’, Victoria commented to Melanie from time to time.
Of course, the big Love guru, Yomiel, the Apostle Paul of Christian foundations, was Mel B’s twin, and he was never far from his woman. Saul of Tarsus ministries was a growing phenomenon these days, and his wealth, through the acceptance of freewill offerings and tithes, grew in leaps and bounds every nanosecond. He was incredibly bloody rich, and challenged the other messiahs, and even the likes of Callodyn and Daniel, whose special investment companies had a perpetual objective of purchasing as many new shares in new companies as literally possible. Of course, people floated at exorbitant demands, way beyond rationale reason, but the big players of the world still seemed to find the finances. Money, usually, was no object.
As the album neared completion, Yomiel had agreed that with the title, which had been reserved aeons ago by the Spice Girls, but given to Mel and Mel as a Christmas present upon the foundation of Melanie2, being a very suitable and potentially profitable title and album, that he would pump in several Googleplexianites of realm credit into the advertising and promotion of the album and, hopefully, produce a legend for the girls. Mel B was suitably impressed, and the lovemaking was something to write home to for a while for Yomiel.
‘The album rocks, girls,’ said Yomiel.
‘Thanks hon,’ said Mel B.
‘It will sell a literal tonne,’ commented Tom. Melanie C kissed him.
Jesus, who was sitting in the corner, headphones on, listening to the final seconds of track 15, was smiling, It was ultrapop – done extraordinarily well, with the aeons of experience quite noticeable.
‘You’ll sell a Googol the opening day,’ he said, putting down the earphones.
The girls smiled. Everything was good.
No, everything was great.
* * * * *
‘Waves crashing over me. My soul it slips down underneath. Into the deep, deep love of God. Into the deep, deep love of peace. But the water swells, the typhoon blows, and suddenly I am in the storm. In the eye of the Maelstrom I find inside – the peace eternity.’
The music swayed and swam through a river of oceanic bliss, and the audience were waving hands, like the ocean, at peace, yet full of the eternal storm of life, the eternal storm of love.
The girls were singing the 15th track of ‘Morning Stars of Glory’ titled ‘Lost in the Sea of Love’, which Melanie C had written, based on ideas from one of her very earliest albums ‘The Sea.’
All over the showgrounds before them, people dressed in the aquamarine t-shirts which the album cover had been based on, with the glowing sun in the centre of the t-shirt. Literally hundreds of thousands of these t-shirts were out there, in the sea of love before them, all the people grooving along to the musical workings of Melanie2, in a world of their own, the sea of God’s eternal peace and love – even in the eye of the Maelstrom – all around them, reminding them of his love, yet placing them on the throne of self, if you know what I mean, in the eye of the Maelstrom, in the eye of the Maelstrom.
And then they started playing, the song list complete, ‘The Sea’ from Melanie C’s album, and the crowed roared.
* * * * *
Yomiel held Mel B’s hand. ‘You are my sea of love,’ he said, as they walked through a field of daisies.
‘Is that what you brought me hear to say, you cheeky bugger,’ responded Mel, a spirited laugh on her lips.
Apostle Paul undid the shirt buttons of his glorious cream shirt, and his chest hair beckoned her attention. ‘Not just to hear my words, fair maiden.’ And then he ravished her, and she complained not for a while,
* * * * *
Ambriel was sitting at his miniatures table. 17 war troops for ‘Mega Risk: The Ambriel Campaigns’, a special risk variant designed by Daniel, the objective of which was to conquer the King Ambriel in his Citadel of Peace, were before him, and he had already painted about 500 of them that year. But things take time, and Ambriel was in a happy little world of his own, painting his miniatures, finding the peace and joy of serving God, when Saruviel, Satan Semyaza Luciferious walked in, called him a wanker, and Ambriel knew he would have no end of trouble for the rest of the afternoon as the 18 year old poked around his flat, with Meludiel and Satan arguing most of the time on the couch, a bewildered Ambriel doing his best to ignore them, painting his miniatures, his eye on the bloody young Saruviel.
* * * * *
Melanie C smiled at the email from Ambriel.
‘It was hell, Mel. Young Saruviel insisted on painting one of my miniatures, and did a disastrous job, typical of youth, as a result. I know I must forgive him, but I will now have to buy another set, and there goes a years effort, as you know how I hate even minor impurities in my painting efforts, and a fly in the ointment always requires a fresh sanding at the very least.
Yet, I know I am complaining. I know I should have grace. I know I should show patience.
I have been listening to ‘Morning Stars of Glory’ dear angel Melanie. It is – wonderful. I gave a copy to Meludiel, and she wrote me expressing thanks.
It is a cut above.
Your brother Ambriel.’
Melanie C smiled at the email from Ambriel. It had made her day.
* * * * *
Ambriel looked at the new set. 777 risk troops – 7 sets of 111 different types. The last set he had carefully finished off, paying close attention to the one done by young Saruviel, stripped away, repainted, and done with as much attention to love, detail and purity which Ambriel was capable of. And then he had put it on his ebay.hev page, sold for a hefty sum, and purchased a new set. This time he would be far more cautious and no Saruviel Satan Semyaza would get his little mitts on it, the Lord bless him.
‘Morning Stars of Glory’ track 7 was playing, ‘Love in the X-Treme’, a funky, playful and fun track, very traditionally spice girls oriented, and it was the get up and go track on the album, which always made Ambriel happy. And when the funky sounding Mel B ‘Xs’ started bopping out of her lips, through the digital data bytes of the CD, cross the speakers, down the soundwaves, into Ambriel’s ears, mind and heart, he was on cloud 9 – literally.
‘You are soldier X’, he said to the soldier he was currently painting. ‘And your destiny is to vanquish Daniel San the Horrible one,’ he said, and then laughed ‘Harrgh hargh hargh,’ in true Danielic fashion.
Later on that week, Daniel had come around, and had picked up ‘Daniel San the Horrible one’ from the TV, were it was sitting, Ambriel having been casting slurs and curses at it constantly in true Messianic vengeful style.
‘Hey, this figurine rocks,’ said Daniel. ‘Can I make an offer?’ he had a grin on his face, and Ambriel suspected divine interference.
‘Half your kingdom,’ responded Ambriel, slyly, getting some cans of Coke and cold pizza from the fridge, throwing a can at Danny boy.
‘Half, hey,’ he said, looking at his younger brother. He surveyed Daniel San the Horrible One and considered. ‘Tis a hefty fee, for one miserly soldier. Yet I think the glory with which I could fashion for him could truly be magnificent. But, nay. The price is too high. How about, though, a copy of Action Comics 2 Googol. I have several spare New Mint copies, and I am sure you would like one.’
Ambriel’s ears cocked up, and he smiled. ‘Um, you sure,’ he said, suddenly very happy with his brother, Daniel, and his accumulating abilities.
‘I Love my little brother Amby Wamby, and I know your fascination with master Kal from the house of El. Say the word and the swap is a done deal.’
Ambriel handed him the pizza, hugged him, and said ‘Thanks bro.’
And three weeks later, finally getting an original copy of Action Comics 2 Googol, one of Superman’s finest adventures, Ambriel was no longer so cross with Daniel San the Horrible one. Not for the moment, anyway.
‘Holiday’ by Greg and Christie came on the radio, the original version, and Daniel almost swore. ‘You are kidding me,’ he said out loud. ‘The rarest track from Greg and Christie, the original recording, never released, and here it was on ‘Realm One Radio’. When the track was finished ‘El Hombre’ the radio host commented, ‘Greg and Christie. Their very first recording. We have played it before, a few times, over the aeons, and there it was people. Greg, by the way, is Seraphim Daniel’s brother, and Christie is Greg’s wife. A rarity from time immemorial, and if we have any requests for a replay, we’ll play it through the week.’
Daniel smiled to himself. Well done, Greggo. A hit.
* * * * *
Father and Son. Satan and young Saruviel, sitting on the court seats of a Kalphon Tennis court, watching Saruviel and Krystabel play a friendly match, Daraqel and Kantriel not far away from the two of them, drinking Pineapple juice of all things, with cold ice.
‘Conquer the world, dad? Conquer the world?’ queried young Saruviel to his father.
‘It is your destiny Luke,’ responded Satan.
‘Huh?’ queried young Skywalker.
‘Nothing,’ said Satan. ‘The plans of the ages take much time to come to fruition, and our adversaries have gone soft – taken the bait – they are fools, I tell you. But the Lord of the Dark shall triumph.’
‘Whatever you say dad,’ said young Saruviel, picking up his Nintendo and starting ‘Crazy Rage 489’ for the 17th time that morning.
As his daredevil character bopped along, screen after screen, young Saruviel was oblivious to his dark father staring at the screen, trying to figure out what the fuck was the fascination to these little idiot boxes anyway. And then young Saruviel lost a live, Satan laughed, and said ‘I saw that coming.’ Young Saruviel handed the console to his father, said ‘You figure out the end of level challenge, then. It’s too hard for me.’
And thus an addiction to video games, which had been a heck of a long time coming, began, and Satan temporarily forgot his dreams of conquest and dark glory, as Krystabel served for the set.
* * * * *
Satan had finished Crazy Rage 489, looked up the game online, found there were 12,456 games in Crazy Rage series, said ‘May as well,’ to himself, and forked over the cash to order the lot, plus a few dozen additional of the Nintendo play cubes which they were played on, and had, for the last year, been addicted to games.
Meludiel, whose life these days consisted of washing dishes, ironing shirts, concentrating on young Saruviel’s education, as his father had no concern for such things apart from his own pearls of wisdom, was content enough with her matriarchal duties.
Satan still loved her – so he claimed from time to time – but, perhaps the most extraordinary thing of all about the Lord of Evil, in the end, was that he was just like the rest of the male population, an ordinary bloke – just one of the boys.
And then, gradually, she noted that the fascination from him of bedding the twin of the Messiah had just about been complete, that he had settled back into a life of mundanity for the time being, and that she was simply expected to do as she was told and keep the beers coming, leading her to a regular Meludielesque decision – divorce the bastard and look up Daniel or David.
Satan said ‘Sure, sweetcheeks,’ signed the papers, and young Saruviel bid his mommy farewell, as she took her suitcase, arrived at Danielphon and unpacked, with Ariel sighing and saying ‘Nothing lasts forever, sweetie. You know.’ And Meludiel nodded.
* * * * *
It was Ambriel who showed up first, kissed her on the cheek, and offered her a place at his current abode. She thought it over, was going to agree, when Daniel showed up, dressed in a cowboy suit, and said ‘Come with me to Free America, and we will ride the wild horses for a while.’ She had been a few times, Melanie had raved about the place, and so she consented, and they were off, to one of the upper heavens, away from it all, a new beginning for a time, and a spirit on Daniel which changed and adapted to his new surroundings, adopting his ‘Free America’ style of doing things as he put it.
Life was good – again – and she found, then, in the eternal aeons she had been alive, and in the joy she found in her heart at this time with this particular angel Daniel – the one who had developed a crush from the earliest of moments in the life of the Realm of Eternity – that after many, many, marriages, it was Daniel usually, and sometimes Ambriel, who lit her fire, loved her the most and the deepest, and gave her joy at his stupidities for which he was well and truly famous.
And of course – as always – the sex was quite, quite good.
* * * * *
Noah had an ego. A very, very, big ego. But the father of Haven Noahide Fellowship, a spiritual assembly which was, these days, starting to gain quite fugging large numbers, had every reason to be a little bit proud. He was Noah – and the continuous tithe from the head fellowship to Noah himself was making him mind bogglingly wealthy. He could build cities, nations, empires – with his cash – and had been thinking about such things recently.
Noah lived in the valley of ‘Titea’s Dream’, on the planet ‘Zanadra’, an Andorran planet. He had lived, and died, many times, going off to rests, each time going through his destiny once more, playing his role time and time again. But that was over with now – no more new lives, he was fit for the eternal. The 8th generation was the final generation, and Noah was alive, now, forever – his memories restored – living with Titea his wife in the valley named after her, living forever.
Of course, though, Zanadra had a number of Haven Noahide Fellowships, and others of the 7 Divine Fellowships which Callodyn and Daniel had formed. And, slowly, throughout the universe, the numbers had grown, and continued to grow, apparently, endlessly so. Apparently.
His wealth, universally, was extreme – so much so, that over 130,00 planets, now, had been purchased by himself with his funds, and he had seed beyond counting, usually those of a Noahide fellowship, on planets out in the heavenlies, names only vaguely known to himself, each of them pursuing their life, each of them pursuing their destiny.
The Children of Noah – the children of the Rainbow.
And, while he did indeed have a big ego, he was reminded time and time again to stay humble about his glory, as it had been God who had given him life, it had been God who had given him his blessing, and his own efforts? Well the Torah talked much of the vanity of man’s imaginations when based on pride.
Noah was – really – happy. And he had developed routines in his circle of life – favourite things which he did, favourite words and sayings which he said. Like a glorified goldfish which swam around the fishbowl, apparently forgetting everything every few seconds, life was, for Noah, always new. He assumed, probably, that he had said the same old words to Titea time and time again, and done the same old things time and time again – the same routines, the same ways of life, the same old circle of life, walking with God through the eternal endlessly so. And he had, fortunately, mastered the worry of repetition through finding the peace of heart and mind in the best of things, his favourite things, and the circle remained pure and true, peaceful and good, and he never worried much anymore about lack of originality. A good night with Titea on the town, and a bed of pleasure for a while afterwards usually allayed even the darkest of depressing thoughts about the simplicity of it all.
Yet, still, there were new things. Still. In fact, video games from Ambriel, continuing various number sequences in some of his titles, some up to millions in their numbering, kept him going, and there always seemed to be a new twist here, or a new twist there, no matter how familiar he became with Ambriel’s style.
Yes, life still kept new and original, and then there arrived a CD in the mail from the Realm, from his daughters Melanie and Melanie, and the Morning Stars of Glory CD became his favourite album for quite some time.
Noah put on the CD ‘Morning Stars of Glory’, and turned it to track 3 ‘Firey Lover’. It was his favourite track on the album, and sexy number, and he and Titea had sweated on the bed, the track playing, grinding away at each other, the atmosphere electric.
Titea, as a lady, with her blonde hair, and good looks, was mainly known for one outstanding feature – her rather firm and large tits – her breasts. She was the kind of woman every man fantasized about, with her wonderful bust, her moist vagina, and with the ecstasy of oral fascination matched by no other of Noah’s lovers. And that was saying something over his many long years.
Noah was heterosexual in orientation, but in former years there had been – encounters – for want of a better word, which had resulted in some unkind, yet true, chuckles over the Rainbow flag in honour of Noah’s covenant. He was not quite as innocent as many had been led to believe in this respect.
But these days his calling and orientation in life was most definitely one of heterosexuality, and firm commitment to the marriage covenant, and that is the way God liked it, and Noah was happy enough to comply.
Noah and Titea enjoyed country music, especially the Australian brand, and his favourite album was ‘Driver’s Seat’ by Aussie female artist Tracy Killeen. He had met Tracy a number of times, and she had even visited ‘Titea’s Dream’ a number of times, performing some acoustic numbers for them on some memorable late summer rainy nights, the thunder and lightning crashing, and the world alive with passion in Noah’s heart. Noah was a sensitive man in many ways, like many of his children, and ‘Driver’s Seat’ had a song called ‘Brave’ which was his favourite song of all time. It motivated him, encouraged him, and spoke to his heart. And when Tracy was around, and pulled out her guitar and sang it for him, he was happier in life at that moment than any other thing, even sex, that he could think of. It made it all – complete. He sang country music, himself, as well, and had a number of albums on the Noahide Music label which Callodyn and Daniel ran, which he had gotten to at the resurrection, and worked hard on his dreams. They sold well, these days, especially in Noahide communities, and every now and then he would pull out the acoustic, only with plastic strings, as he hated toughening his fingers for the steel stringed ones, and strummed away, sang his songs for Titea and occasionally Naamah, and crooned his country heart away, as the coyotes they’d had imported howled in the distance, and the night crickets hummed their business. He would tour, eventually, again, one day – eventually. But mostly his music was for his own world, the world of Noah, the world of ‘Titea’s Dream’, and in that dream it was one of the virtues his life was graced with which gave it a sense of completion. He did play piano as well, and composed basic pieces, yet never wrote them down, for he was sure, after all this time, they’d been written to death by countless composers before him. Thus, in this musical life he was also happy to celebrate in his endless days, he found the fascination and love of heart and soul which countless others also did, all the more inspired by the new album of Melanie2 which, after a few weeks, had led him out to the porch with his guitar, strumming away, thinking thoughts, thinking on the level of complexities in their album, and thinking he may as well have another go at it. There was nothing to lose, after all, and only a world to gain. Only a world to gain.
* * * * *
Saruviel Satan Semyaza Luciferious picked up the guitar his father had bought him, put on the CD ‘Morning Stars of Glory’ which he had purchased that morning, which was still currently number one on the charts after 7 years in the slot, and smiled as the now familiar single of the opening track played from the speakers, and he strummed along, thinking over the glory which awaited him.
‘The Devil’s Angels’ he thought to himself – a restricted band name his father owned, which ole Nick had said he could use if he wanted to. And young Saruviel had not refused him, purchased a guitar, and was starting to learn it. He would be ready to rock, as they put it, one day – ready to roll – and when the Devil’s Angels had conquered all, life would never be the same again – literally.
* * * * *
Callodyn Gabriel Daniel Daly looked at the keyboard his father, Daniel, had purchased for him a week ago. ‘Music,’ he thought to himself. ‘Should he really pursue it?’ He had been listening to ‘Morning Stars of Glory’ for the last 2 years constantly, as it had gradually risen to the top of his playlist, and its absolute excellence had become very noticeable on the music critic charts. He loved the album, now, and was ready to pursue a new dream in life, or rather, any dream, as nothing had inspired him very much anyway. So music – a band – perhaps the most normal of careers in many ways, but an exciting one none the less. He sat down at the keyboard, turned it on, put it on electric organ, and started hitting the keys, and dabbling away. He couldn’t play yet, and it was vain sounds emanating, but little steps led to great glories, so his father Daniel had taught him a number of times, and you had to start somewhere.
He listened to the CD playing in the background, tinkered away, and did not notice Daniel standing at the doorway of the apartment in Zaphon tower, watching his son, quite proud of an ambition finally being pursued.
* * * * *
Alf Lambert, for the most part, was over it. Over, finally, being a perverted, poofy, bumfucker. His wife, Haylie, or Haylee, or Hayley, or one of the endless variants she used, as she couldn’t quite remember the original spelling, was a faithful wife, good for him, pleasant in the bedroom, and blonde and delicious – the way he liked them. As a symbologist, Alf Lambert had cracked many mysteries over his long life, even had a go at Death’s ultimate challenge which Daniel had solved, and felt he had started to work it out somewhat before eventually losing interest. And then, like the others, he had died, and lived again, time and time again. And then it had been the 7th life which had seemed the most real, the most passionate, the most which spoke to the heart of Alf Lambert, and that too had ended. And now, living in Zaphora, a most expensive place, afforded a long time ago through diligent savings, wise investments, and hard bloody work, Alf was a happy symbologist, getting good royalties for his non-fiction works on the subject, occasionally hired in Zaphora for this and that responsibility, but for the most part going through his regular routine with Hales and living the life.
He was still a member of the Church of Catholic Glory, the Lord Fletcher’s church, yet the doctrine of Quaternity had long since disappeared, and Pete mainly kept it somewhat low key, encouraged the flock to specialise in basketball in its contribution to universal society and culture, and keep on keeping on in true Fletch style. And life was good enough at that, Alf Lambert had generally concluded.
An album, though, had been on Hales playlist for ages now and while Alf, not usually much of a musical man, had not taken any real interest in it to start with, its quality was starting to become known to it through Haylies constant playing of the CD.
And then, in the newspaper, tickets to Melanie2 at the Zaphoran ‘Ultra Dome’ and, inspired, a quick purchase of the incredibly expensive items, and he knew Hales would give him good head for ages. At least he hoped so.
* * * * *
Haylie Lambert smiled at Callodyn. And then she smiled at young Saruviel. And then, saying ‘Dream on dudes. I’m married,’ she didn’t give either of them what they were after, but picked up the bass guitar, started riffing for 15 minutes, as ‘The Devil’s Angels’ did their second official Jam, hoping against hope that their famous connections would get them the slot at the ‘Ultra Dome’ opening for Melanie2, despite their obvious lack of experience. But Haylie kicked ass at the bass, and they were hoping – truly – against hope for that lucky break.
‘Your dad. The Rapper. Eminem. He’s fucking huge,’ said young Saruviel.
‘Yeh,’ said Haylie, doing her best to get along with her new band and acting cool. ‘He’s a bastard, you know, deep, deep down. But even deeper than that, there is this guy who does act responsibly when he has to. I couldn’t choose another.’
‘Cool,’ said Callodyn.
They jammed for a while, Haylie noticing that the two of them were somewhat competent at their instruments despite their inexperience, and she thought long and hard about using her influence with her dad to try and secure a slot with Melanie2, hopefully opening for them. They had about 3 months before the main show, just enough time to go from fucking raw to fucking ‘Maybe’, and that was the clincher in her heart in the end. ‘Maybe’. She called her dad on the mobile later that afternoon, sweet talked him as much as possible, and a week later, Melanie and Melanie saying what the hell, the good news came through, and one bass player, one keyboard player and one guitarist who doubled as the vocalist for the most part, were looking for a ‘Bloody good drummer’ in Hales own words. And then ‘Joy Gaskill’, the son of a famed Kings X drummer, a drummer himself, showed up, and the ‘Devil’s Angels’ were formed, one of the more legendary Rock and Fucking Roll outfits that ever graced the Realm of Eternity.
* * * * *
‘Dark soldiers, dressed in black. Dark soldiers, ready for the attack. Dark soldiers, ready for the kill. Dark soldiers, just for the thrill.’
The ‘Devil’s Angels’ lead singer, Saruviel Satan Semyaza Luciferious belted out the song in their live performance in front of a handful of people who had shown up to the early preview ahead of next months Melanie2 live show at the Ultra Dome. They rocked, they fucking rolled, they were better than crap, but not quite cool. They were raw hard rock, and the crowd in the small park of a dozen or so people clapped along a bit, and the band felt they were hot shit by the end of their set.
‘We kick ass,’ said Callodyn.
‘Me and Joy kick ass,’ responded Haylie. ‘You guys were crap.’
‘We kicked ass,’ said young Saruviel, making the Dio devil’s symbol with his hand. ‘And you guys fucking know it.’
‘Maybe,’ said Joy. ‘But we aren’t ready yet. More fine tuning, and we’ll be ready for our first major show.’
‘And then we kick ass,’ said Callodyn, with unbridled passion, and Joy and Haylie almost smiled.
* * * * *
The crowds had gathered, and a whole host of God’s little children were at the Ultra-Dome, on the central disc of the Realm of Eternity, known as Zaphora, in the city of Zaphona which filled most of the disc, not far from Zaphon tower which occupied a central position in the Realm of Eternity, the highest monolith, now, in the universe.
Noah and Titea were there, with their Melanie2 T-shirts proudly worn, ready to rock.
Daniel and Ariel were in the front row, were the noise was deafening.
Meludiel and Ambriel were back further a little, in a less noisy section, and anticipating the time of their lives.
And then the other spice girls and their partners, with Yomiel and Laquenta, were over by the side in a reserved area, chatting about this and that, waiting for the show to begin.
‘Fuck. Has anyone seen my sticks?’ yelled Joy.
Haylie plucked away wildly at her bass strings, keeping her eye on young Saruviel, who was drinking water, playing around with his throat, and looking fucking nervous.
Callodyn was cracking his knuckles constantly, and while she didn’t mind him warming up, she didn’t want them going to shit on her.
They looked nervous.
They’d been up all night partying.
They were partially wasted.
Young Saruviel still had a hangover.
Callodyn had not washed himself, and smelt fucking awful.
Even Joy looked fucked.
They had still only managed a half-arsed stage rehearsal.
They were ready.
‘Ladies and Gentleman. The Legend is born – the ‘Devil’s Angels.’ Are you ready to fucking Rock?’ yelled the presenter. The crowd went wild.
And the music began.
And the kids kicked ass.
* * * * *
Of course, Melanie2 were the anticipated highlight of the night, but it was, in the press, the Devil’s Angels and their raw energy which got all the attention. A legend, indeed, had apparently been born. ‘A new band of monumental potential proportions’, said a Rolling Stone Review, ‘finally graced us with their presence last night. And they kicked ass.’
* * * * *
‘Upstaged by the kids,’ said Melanie C.
‘Yep,’ responded Mel B.
‘Kind of puts you off, don’t it,’ said Melanie C.
‘Yep,’ responded Mel B.
‘We wouldn’t want that to become a habit, would we,’ said Melanie C.
‘Yep,’ responded Mel B.
‘So we better start kicking ass again,’ said Melanie C.
And Melanie Brown stood up, came over to her bandsister, looked into her eyes dramatically, and said ‘Yep.’
And that was that.
* * * * *
Morning Stars of Glory had been number one for a fair long hike. But the self-titled debut live ep from the Devil’s Angels live performance at the Ultra-Dome, miraculously, broke through, and hit the top slot realm wide. The baddest ass band of the lot had arrived.
Melanie and Melanie eventually got over the embarrassment, and continued on with their tour around the major central hotspots of the Realm, becoming increasingly popular, with ‘Morning Stars of Glory’ continuing to sell like blazers. But they were no longer number one, and while the ‘Devil’s Angel’s’ miraculous breakthrough only claimed the top slot for 7 weeks, when a new entry crashed in, the legend had indeed been born.
And life – perhaps – would never be the same again.
Melanie and Daniel 4
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
‘Bwah ha ha harrggh. Bwah ha ha harrggh. Bwah ha ha harrggh.’
Melanie looked at Daniel with a confused look on her face. ‘What is your problem, Daniel?’
‘Bugger,’ he responded. ‘They have found my secret stash of hidden angel stories. They have searched, and now they have found them on my hidden online places.’
‘Oh,’ said Melanie, and returned to her issue of Vogue. But, after a while, curiousity got the better of her, and she walked into the den, finding Daniel playing ‘Trip over Traps’ and stared at him. ‘You are my sweetheart, you know,’ she said, with genuine love in her voice.
He said nothing, but looked at her. ‘Oh, really,’ he responded.
‘Yes,’ she said, with complete honesty. And then the little minx began her work.
‘Daniel,’ she moaned, coming over to him, kneeling at his feet, caressing his knees. ‘You know I like fucking you. Well, I might even give you head tonight. How would you like that?’
‘You don’t give me that, that much anymore.’
‘Oh. Only on special occasions,’ she responded, looking up into the eyes of her man.
‘Right,’ he nodded. ‘Figures. What is the special occasion?’
‘Oh, nothing,’ she responded, feigning perfect innocence. Nothing at all, really. Nothing major, anyway.’
‘Out with it,’ he said.
‘Look, the truth is,’ she began,’ and then looked right into his eyes. ‘The truth is, I love your stories.’ There – she had said it. She had finally confessed she liked his stuff.
‘Oh,’ he said, a little shocked.
‘I’m not going to fall apart in my life just to get your stories, Danny. I love you, but I am a woman. I have my pride.’
‘You want my stash?’ he said, bluntly.
She stood, undressed, and opened his trousers. For 5 minutes she sucked wildly and he blew heavily into her mouth. She swallowed, and said ‘I’ll fuck your brains out every night, if you tell me what you’ve got?’
Daniel gulped, turned to his PC, and brought up a page. ‘This has links to some stories. Not everything. But stuff I will show you.’
She smiled, sat down at the PC, and looked at the Story Titles and Links.
Chronicles of the Eternal Realm of Glory
Melanie and Daniel 5
Melanie and Daniel 6
Melanie and Daniel 7
Melanie and Daniel 8
Melanie and Daniel 9
Melanie and Daniel 10
Melanie and Daniel 11
Melanie and Daniel 12
Angels of Hope
Gloryel and Daniel 2
Gloryel and Daniel 3
Gloryel and Daniel 4
Gloryel and Daniel 5
Gloryel and Daniel 6
Gloryel and Daniel 7
Gloryel and Daniel 8
Gloryel and Daniel 9
Gloryel and Daniel 10
Gloryel and Daniel 11
Gloryel and Daniel 12
Angels of Faith
Victoria and Daniel
Victoria and Daniel 2
Victoria and Daniel 3
Victoria and Daniel 4
Victoria and Daniel 5
Victoria and Daniel 6
Victoria and Daniel 7
Victoria and Daniel 8
Victoria and Daniel 9
Victoria and Daniel 10
Victoria and Daniel 11
Victoria and Daniel 12
Angels of Love
Emma and Daniel
Emma and Daniel 2
Emma and Daniel 3
Emma and Daniel 4
Emma and Daniel 5
Emma and Daniel 6
Emma and Daniel 7
Emma and Daniel 8
Emma and Daniel 9
Emma and Daniel 10
Emma and Daniel 11
Emma and Daniel 12
Chronicles of the Infinite Realm of Majesty
Mel and Dan
Mel and Dan 2
Mel and Dan 3
Mel and Dan 4
Mel and Dan 5
Mel and Dan 6
Mel and Dan 7
Mel and Dan 8
Mel and Dan 9
Mel and Dan 10
Mel and Dan 11
Mel and Dan 12
‘Is that all?’ she asked him.
‘Like I said,’ there is more.
‘And were do I find THOSE ones?’
‘Well, I guess,’ he said, then went silent.
‘Out with it,’ she demanded it.
‘I guess the sex will have to be pretty good,’ he said quietly, not looking at her. She took the hint, got down on her knees, revived his member, and for the second time in a few minutes, sucked wildly, running her hands up and down his phallus, stroking it, stroking his legs, and then she looked up at him and said ‘Fuck my mouth you hot bastard,’ and he erupted creamy cum at a furious rate down her throat.
‘Fuck,’ he said.
‘Tonight,’ she responded.
And they did.
Melanie was tinkering around their home in Joniquay. Here they were, together again, back in the Eternal Realm of Glory, the third heaven, were Raphael’s authority was eternally in place. Like it was also called in Heaven below, the second heaven, were Gabriel was firstborn and his authority absolute, they lived in the major capital of the Eternal Realm of Glory, known as Joniquay, were they had always been for the most part. They visited a nearby city, named Citydale, quite often, were Melanie had a ministry job taking care of people in the ‘House of Broken Hearts.’ Melanie had an annual income of quite a large sum, mainly because her fame, now, was very great, and she could afford huge sums from people for her personal ministerings. Daniel didn’t object – extra cash was never objected to.
For the most part, now, in the United Universes as they were called, both Daniel and Melanie usually resided in the Realm of Eternity, which was part of the Universal structure of the 7 Heavens. The Realm of Eternity was part of the first heaven, the foundational one down below. In the first heaven, funnily enough, were the structures of Home, were the theophany of God resided, below that the traditional and original 7 heavens, were the children of Heaven resided, then the Realm of Infinity further down, then the Realm of Eternity, and then the Realm of Paradise and the original Realm of Splendour, known as ‘Majestika’. Above the first heaven was the second heaven, were Gabriel was firstborn, and it had simply been known as ‘Heaven’. Then the third heaven, which was ‘The Eternal Realm of Glory’ were they currently resided, in which Raphael was firstborn. Above them in the third heaven was the fourth heaven, which was the official Realm of Splendour for discussion purposes. In that fourth heaven, the Realm of Splendour, Uriel was firstborn. And then the fifth heaven, the Infinite Realm of Majesty, were Raguel was firstborn. And then the 6th Heaven, simply called ‘Heaven’, were Phanuel was firstborn, and then the 7th heaven above that, the ‘Megaverse’ of spiritual realms, where Saruviel was firstborn.
And then, the eighth heaven? Were Sariel was firstborn? And, apparently, so far anyway, that was the eternal domain, but it was simply all 7 heavens united, they had found so far – Apparently the end of God’s creative spiritual designs. From Michael to Saruviel. Apparently. But Melanie, chatting with Daniel from time to time, had occasionally heard him remark on ideas about the supposed 45th Heaven, the ‘Realm of Understanding’ as he called it. Were ‘The Earthmother’ challenged all, and the Seraphim of God were held in hostility. It was the triumph of the ‘Pagan’ world, so Daniel called it. Melanie found all such talk, to put it bluntly, amusing. Was he making this all up? Was it fancies from the mind of Daniel? Who knew for sure. Who really knew.
And then he had shown her this link:
And said that should explain things he had dreamed on and had visions on and had understandings on. And she had read the stories, and contemplated such things more seriously after that.
But, for most intents and purposes, and when dealing with reality, there were but 7 heavens, and that was reality, wasn’t it? That was reality.
So, for now, having resided in the Realm of Eternity for quite some time since the rebirth of themselves after the end of the 7th great rest, Melanie had found Daniel, had whispered in his ear that she loved him, for he was currently single, and she was likewise, and he had proposed, she had accepted, and they had drifted up to their natural dominion together, claimed their old abode which was still quite legally theirs, moved in together, and resumed the life of the Eternal Realm of Glory, happy together again, all things now understood in life, all mysteries solved, ready for living the eternal dream. Ready for anything. Apparently.
* * * * *
Gloryel looked at Jovius. ‘You sure about this?’ she asked him.
‘Don’t you wanna live, baby?’ Jovius said, ready to slam down the accelerator on the Lightmobile.
‘Probably just that. I want to LIVE,’ she responded sarcastically.
‘Then hold on, babe,’ and he slammed down the pedal, and the vehicle burst through heaven, upwards, throttling along at an incredible rate, found the jump gate, burst through far to quickly, and suddenly they were sailing through the Eternal Realm of Glory, far above the cityscape far down below, on cloud 9 – literally.
‘Well, here we are babe,’ said Jovius, taking out a cigarette, lighting it, and doing his best to look cool behind the wheel of the car.
Geri turned her head, looked down at the city, and turned to him. ‘Freak. We are up high a bit much, don’t you think.’
‘What, you scared?’ he asked her.
‘Not on your life,’ responded Ginger.
‘Good. Then you won’t mind this,’ he said, and the car suddenly lunged straight up, before turning downwards at a fucking huge velocity.
Geri’s face was in torment, and she turned it to look at Jovius, who had a mad look of glee on his face, but she wouldn’t say anything. She wouldn’t show herself afraid.
And then the city got closer and closer and closer, and she finally, scared shitless, said ‘I’m not quite ready for death, Jovius,’ to which he glanced at her, nodded, and pulled up, just a few hundred metres before their death.
‘What a rush, babe,’ he said, the cigarette still, amazingly, burning from his mouth.
Geri shook her head and said, silently, ‘never again.’
They flew along for a few minutes, over the city of Joniquay, and Jovius finally turned to her. ‘Right. Were do the shmucks live?’
Geri looked down, and then looked ahead at the air crossroads they were suddenly approaching. She looked at the sign, remembered were she was, and then giving instructions they flew along for the next half an hour before, finding their suburb, disappearing down through the air alleyway, onto the main road, and hovering along they drove, found the place, and Jovius parked the Lightmobile out the front.
‘We’re here,’ she said.
‘Ready for anything?’ asked Jovius.
‘Ready for anything,’ responded Gloryel.
Jovius held his cue stick, observed Daniel’s shot, and turned to Glory. ‘Your shot.’
She took her aim, plunged her stick, and sank the shot. The final black fell. Daniel looked at the final score. ‘We won. By 1 point. Good game, kids.’
‘Lucky,’ said Jovius.
‘Perhaps,’ said Melanie. ‘But we have been practicing for a while.’
The four of them were in the back room of Daniel and Melanie’s place, playing snooker, relaxing after having been out for lunch for most of the afternoon. Jovius and Gloryel had been with them a few days, and the atmosphere was good. Happy.
Daniel picked up his beer, motioned for Jovius to come over and chat at the Gauntlet II machine, while Melanie sat down next to Geri.
‘So, you want to work,’ said Melanie.
‘Mmm. Yes,’ responded Geri, sipping on her gin and cola.
‘Why? You have plenty of cash.’
Geri Halliwell looked at her bandmate seriously. ‘I’m not as young as I used to be, Melanie C. Perhaps, after all these millions of years, it’s about time I took dad’s advice.’
‘Which is?’ asked Melanie C.
‘Get a real job.’
Mel nodded. Geri had grown up.
Jovius was manoeuvring his blue wizard around the screen, about to capture some food, when Daniel shot the food.
‘Green Valkyrie shot the food,’ said the game.
‘Bastard,’ said Jovius. Daniel laughed.
‘What type of Job?’ asked Melanie C.
‘I don’t know. A real one, I guess,’ responded Geri. ‘I’ve done real work before. Ages ago. I’m not totally useless, you know. There is more to Geraldine Esthelle Halliwell than being a Spice Girl.’
‘I believe you,’ responded Melanie C.
‘You’re nearly out of food,’ said Daniel.
‘You steal it all,’ said Jovius.
‘Hey. I’ve practiced. But, I’ll give you a break,’ and Daniel pumped in about twenty 20 cent coins into the machine for Blue Wizard, whose health went up extraordinarily.
‘Thanks,’ said Jovius.
‘Think nothing of it,’ responded Daniel.
‘So you are saying a Spice Girl isn’t real work? We worked bloody hard.’
‘Spice is fantasy,’ said Geri. ‘Not reality. Real people work a regular job, get regular money, and do regular things. There is more to say for that lifestyle than perhaps girls like us ever really learnt to appreciate.’
‘Vicky runs lots of businesses,’ responded Melanie.
‘Which is my point,’ said Geri. ‘She runs them. We girls don’t do the grind for the universe. Others do that for us. It’s our luxuries. It comes down to something simple, in the end. Something very simple.’
‘Which is?’ asked Melanie C honestly.
Geri stood, looked at the boys, started walking to them, and turned back to Mel. ‘Paying dues, sporty. Paying dues.’
Melanie Chisholm understood her point. Something to now consider.
* * * * *
‘OK! I fucking admit it. I fucking, bloody, admit it, bitch. I wasn’t the fucking messiah.’ The hostility in that statement was as big as a galaxy.
7 days later, when the agony of aeons of boasting had dissipated somewhat, Jesus of Nazareth walked into the main living room, having been boiling in fury in his bedroom, only drinking water, saying Jenna, his twin, could go to hell, and looked at his wife, sat down next to her, and said bluntly. ‘But Orthodox Judaism just fucking sucks.’
‘You’ll come round,’ she responded confidently.
‘I’ll probably join Daniel and Callodyn. They have brains. Karaism is for me.’
She turned to him, nervously. ‘Uhh, you don’t want to do that,’ she said, suddenly in a very cute voice – a very cute, but distressingly worried voice.
‘Oh. 1 Samuel 8, right? And Amby fucking Wambies and King David’s extreme concerns over such theologies.’
‘Shut up. Bastard!’ she said, turning to magma. ‘Pot calling the fucking kettle black. Hypocrite.’
Jesus smiled. He had her.
‘Oh. Really Jen? Mmm. Mmm. Mmmm. Mmm. Yeh. Yeh, fuckit. Karaite will do. And I think I will form that spiritual ministry Daniel has constantly suggested. The Gospel Messages of the beautiful Jesus of Nazareth – Son of Judaism. All the kosher bits of the gospel, Daniel’s variants.’
‘You suck,’ she said.
‘Why is that? Oh, let me guess, 14 trillion years of soul-winning down the drain.’
‘Oh, come on Yesh. Everyone knows orthodoxy is the way to go.’
‘Yep. Yep. Yep.’ He responded nodding. ‘Right. Where’s my phone book. I’ll have to ring Danny boy. Form an alliance.’
‘You suck,’ she said.
He almost laughed.
In the heavenlies the Almighty sighed. ‘Oh well, I guess he always was a Karaite in the end, anyway.’
‘There could be some INTERESTING ideas. For starters, trying to convert them to Judaism through circumcision. Well. Well it is not going to work for a lot of them, Yesh. Trying to make your new Gospel followers Jews. Yeh, it will work for some of them. For some of the more devoted ones. But men like there penis left intact, for the most part. Just the way we are as humans.’
Jesus nodded, and looked at the snooker table. It was his shot. He sunk a red, and missed the colour. 1 more point.
‘So you allow the Noahide faith to prosper in ‘The Church of Jesus of Nazareth of the Kosher Karaite Gospel of God’, and you categorize people to the official covenants of the Tanakh. You know, Adamide faith for your Adamides, Noahide faith for your Noahides, Abrahamide faith for your Abrahamides and Israelide faith for your Israelides, plus all the other significant family traditions and tribal faiths which have developed out there. If you want your own church keep them within their OWN traditional group within their faith covenant. It will work then.’
Jesus agreed. That sounded wise.
‘People don’t really care if you are Jew or Gentile in the end. If they have a decent attitude towards mankind and speak well enough, they will give you a break in the end. Even the harder ones. But be careful. Trying to convert all mankind will only bite you in the bum in the end. There are – humans – who have their own new agendas. New agendas which they intend to NEVER let go of.’
‘Kapiche Kemosabe,’ responded the former Christ Child.’
And Daniel smiled.
* * * * *
Jesus handed Daniel the document. ‘The concise version, Dan. It will take me a few years, but there will be an expanded version – carefully going through your objections that you pointed out.’
‘All Christ claims removed?’ asked Daniel the Seraphim.
‘Then you will get God’s approval. Cease the lies and he will bless you. He doesn’t mind people having their own spiritual thoughts. Just promote them within HIS kingdom, and it will work.’
Daniel looked at the document:
THE CONCISE GOSPEL OF JESUS OF NAZARETH
One day as he saw the crowds gathering, Jesus went up on the mountainside and sat down. His disciples gathered around him, and he began to teach them.
‘God blesses those who are poor and realize their need for him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs
God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted
God blesses those who are humble, for they will inherit the whole earth
God blesses those who hunger and thirst for justice, for they will be satisfied
God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy
God blesses those whose hearts are pure, for they will see God
God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God
God blesses those who are persecuted for doing right, for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs
God blesses you when people mock you and persecute you and lie about you and say all sorts of evil things against you because you are my followers. Be happy about it! Be very glad! For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, the ancient prophets were persecuted the same way.
And you must pray like this: Our Father in heaven, may your name be kept holy. May your Kingdom come soon. May your will be done on earth, as it is in heaven. Give us today the food we need, and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us. And don’t let us yield to temptation, but deliver us from all evil. For thine is the Kingdom, the power and the glory, world without end, Amen.’
Jesus continued his teaching. ‘Judge not, less you are likewise judged. For the standard you use in your judgement may very well be applied to yourself in the way God decides to judge you. So what if there is a problem with your brother, like a little speck in his eye. You probably have a log in your own eye, so at least remove the log before you try getting the speck out of your brother’s eye.
Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.’
One of the teachers of religious law was standing there listening to the debate. He realized that Jesus had answered well, so he asked, ‘Of all the commandments, which is the most important?’
Jesus replied, ‘The most important commandment is this: ‘Shema Israel, Adonai Eloheinu, Adonai Achud.’ And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. Secondly, you shall love your neighbour as yourself. These are the prime commandments.’
The teacher replied ‘Well said Jesus of Nazareth. To love God with all of your being is the summation of our faith, so much more than just the sacrificial aspects.’
‘You are not far from heaven,’ Jesus responded to the teacher.
Jesus spoke to his disciples. ‘There was a man, walking along a road, and he saw a man who had apparently been robbed, lying on the road, bleeding. He was a Pharisee this man, and looked at the bleeding man, but was too busy to help him so walked on. Later on a scribe came by, but was also just a little too busy to get involved, and passed on as well. Later that day, when it was starting to get cold and dark, a Samaritan came along, who the Pharisees and Scribes really don’t approve of, looked at the man, and despite it being late and cold, troubled himself to put the man carefully on his donkey, take him to an inn, and pay for his healing. Now tell me, was it the Pharisee, scribe or Samaritan who did the right thing?’
Jesus spoke to his disciples. ‘The younger son of a farmer wanted the good life, sick to death of work. He’d had enough, demanded his inheritance right there and then, and because the farmer loved his son, he gave him his share. The son went off, partied for quite a while, but ended up broke. He was working for a man, feeding the pigs, and eating very poorly, when he came to his senses. ‘At home I’ll get a better feed. I will ask for forgiveness. I have been an idiot, but hopefully dad will forgive me.’ The son went home, and his father killed the fatted lamb in his son’s honour. But the older brother, who had worked hard and not left, remaining faithful, complained. And then the father said to the older brother, ‘I would have done so much for you as well, and more besides. But rejoice, for your brother was lost to the family, but is now found again.’
A while later, after Jesus had been taken up to heaven, Saul converted and became Paul. And writing to the Corinthian Church, he wrote:
‘If I spoke with the tongues of an Angel, in all his glory, and thought myself splendid, what would it matter if I didn’t really love people very much. If I was the ultimate prophetical voice, and expounded the word of God with so much wisdom that people were amazed at me, but didn’t practice love towards my friends and fellows, what kind of person am I really? If I had 7 university degrees, with PhD’s, but lacked intelligence in how I showed love to people, perhaps not even loving them at all, is my life really worth living? Love suffers long and is kind and patient. It is not arrogant or rude or unforgiving. And it does not think highly of itself, puffing itself up in pride. Love is the true voice of prophecy, it is the true word of God. And love, knowledge of love itself, is what is eternal. You see, prophetical preachers come and go, but love will last forever. All that knowledge was part of our learning, but love is the completion of our journey, giving us a fulfilment in life which makes it all worth while. When I was younger I behaved in childish ways, but growing up and growing in love I have learned to put these ways behind me. While I am young and naïve what I know is not complete, but when I love completely my knowledge will be perfect. Faith will last forever, and is a great virtue. Hope will endure for all time, and is a wonderful truth. But love is special, greater than even faith and hope, yes love is the greatest of all.’
‘Brilliant,’ said Daniel.
‘Lets hope it works,’ responded the son of Joseph and Mary.
‘And I’ll drink to that,’ finished Daniel the Seraphim.
'Oh, and here is the link. The Glorious Church of Hope in the Beautiful Jesus of Nazareth.'
'Cool,' responded Daniel.
Geri looked at the fries. ‘Here we go again,’ she said to herself, picked up the bag, put it over her shoulder, closed the large fridge door, walked back to her ‘Fries’ station, opened the bag, dumped the fries into the large container, and put on yet another bunch of fries that day, in her new job in ‘Captain Jack’s Pizza and Fries’ universal fast food restaurant. She was – completely – stuffed.
20 minutes later, her second 4 hour for the shift that day over, the second week of grind of her new job complete, she was about ready to go to Melanie, say she was full of pride, and nothing more. But then she remembered ‘Somebody has to do this shit, and not everyone has the luxury of being a Spicie.’ And so she steeled herself, changed back into her regular clothing in the change room, logged off, collected her second paycheck, and, ironically, walked out to the front of the shop, found Daniel patiently waiting, who said ‘Do you mind if I grab some fries and a coke?’ She almost hit him.
That night the 5 of them dined at ‘Fabio’s’, not far from were Mel and Dan lived, Jesus offering to pay for the meal. Jovius was next to Geri, who he was sort of currently dating in a way, sort of, as Emma had stormed off a few years back saying ‘It was over forever.’ Jovius found Geri, who said ‘Sure, we can hang for a while,’ and that is what they had been doing since.
Melanie looked at Jesus. ‘Concise Gospel? I didn’t think you would ever go for it.’
‘Times change. Jenna is a stubborn wife.’
‘I was a Catholic, once,’ said Geri.
‘Mmmm,’ said Daniel. ‘I started off as one, actually, as well.’
Jesus smiled softly. ‘Well, perhaps you would make ideal members of the Glorious Church of Hope in the Beautiful Jesus of Nazareth.’
Daniel looked at Jesus, and Geri, quietly, under the table, took his hand. Here it was. The offer had come.
‘Look. J. It is an interesting offer. Very. I – remember, you know. There was this time, in my youth, when the Church was home. When it was taken for granted. But then an OLDER spirit showed up, and an Ark of Salvation, and a funny fella called Noah eventually dropped in to say hello, and that was that. And that, well, that was the END of that. Ok. Sorry.’
Jesus took a sip of his ginger beer. ‘Too bad. Dan. We could have used a man with your talent.’
Geri sighed. Daniel had made her final, ultimate, decision. Such was life.
‘It sounds interesting,’ said Jovius. They all turned to look at Mr Glinka.
‘Interesting?’ queried Jesus.
‘Interesting,’ responded the angel.
‘Mmmm,’ said Yeshua, and said not much more that night.
* * * * *
Geri and Jovius were in the kitchen. Jovius had a can of Sprite in his hand, a cigarette on the bench which he hadn’t yet lit up, and Geri was seated at the table, drinking orange juice, a vacant look on her face.
‘What’s up, babe?’ he asked her.
She said nothing initially, staring into space, her mind nowhere at all really, before she came to herself and looked at him. ‘Sorry, what was that hon?’
‘What’s up’ he asked again, sipping on his sprite.
She looked at him, seriously. ‘I don’t think he’ll change his mind, now. I think it is made up.’
‘Whose’ Jovius queried.
‘Daniel’s’ she responded.
The silence resumed for about 5 minutes, and Jovius started another can of Sprite.
‘So what?’ he asked her.
‘We didn’t like to let go. That wasn’t our way. We were the church of God. We were meant to last forever.’
‘I suppose it probably will,’ he responded.
‘In some form, yes. But not now. Not what was planned.’
‘What do you mean?’ he asked her.
‘Each generation, in heaven, we knew those who were supposed to be ours, and those who belonged to the world or elsewhere. Daniel was one of us. We thought it was meant to be.’
‘I guess it wasn’t,’ he responded.
‘No,’ she said flatly.
‘He found his own destiny,’ he said after a while.
‘I know,’ she responded.
‘So why do you worry about it?’
‘Because I will follow him. Forever,’ she responded.
‘That’s very faithful of you,’ he said, sipping on his sprite, but there was a concerned look on her face.
‘What’s the problem, then?’
‘I won’t be in the church in the end. I have to leave it in my heart.’
‘That’s the problem, is it?’
Geri looked at him, seriously. ‘Daniel has spoken to me. Told me of God’s plans. The church, now, has a destiny. To drift – forever – to the stars. Forever to the stars. FOREVER – to the stars.’
‘Nomads?’ he queried.
‘And the problem with that?’
‘I’ll still be here. In a billion, billion, billion, billion years. And beyond that. FOREVER. I will still be here. But the Church – gone. Forgotten. Drifting. I will never know her again.’
‘But you will be home,’ he said.
‘Yes,’ she nodded. ‘I will be home.’
‘Then that is what I will choose,’ said Jovius, making his decision. ‘To stay at home.’
She looked at him, and a heart full of fear overcame her and said ‘So don’t worry about that anymore.’
She stood, came over to Jovius, kissed him on the cheek, and said ‘Thank you.’
Later on Daniel and Melanie came in, arguing, and Jesus soon followed them. He looked at Geri, winked at her, and said ‘Churches come and go Geri Halliwell. You didn’t think I would leave me home in the end, did you?’
And she said nothing, but stared at him, and he started laughing. And Daniel said ‘A Jew, in the end, is a fucking Jew. Even Jesus of fucking Nazareth.’
And Jesus laughed.
‘Let’s go,’ said Yeshua. ‘Fucking fast, Jovius. Fucking fast.’
Daniel, in the back seat, next to Melanie and Geri said ‘Not too fucking fast, mate. I have some sensitive ladies back here.’
Yeshua looked at Jovius and winked. ‘Hit it Jo.’
Jovius smiled, pushed the Lightmobile’s pedal to the pedal, and it burst up into the heavens, a firey phoenix of glory.
Soon they were at ‘Scarlets’. A café, floating in space, powered by light solar power for hovering purposes.
‘Mind the step,’ said Daniel. ‘It’s a long way down.’
Inside they drank beer, Canadian stuff, and found the Daytona driving game. Yeshua won, comprehensively, but Daniel didn’t compete. Just watched the Christ Child. Just watched him.
On the way back home Geri stood, as the Lightmobile ran fast downwards at an angle, ripped of her top, and the wind rushed through her hair, as her tits flashed to the world, Jovius giving her a good gawk, Yeshua too embarrassed to comment. ‘I can be spontaneous as well,’ she said to Jovius. He smiled. ‘Thank God for that, babe. Thank God for that.’
The rest of the day they played strip poker, and when Jesus was in his underwear Jovius naked, Daniel fully clothed, and both Melanie and Geri down to their knickers, Daniel smiled. ‘Heh, heh, heh Yesh. Do you want to quit now, and save what is left of your dignity. I don’t think I could stomach seeing the what will be the obviously tiny phallus of the beautiful Jesus of Nazareth.’
‘Go to hell,’ said Jesus.
‘I mean, how large could it possibly be? You know what they say, the bigger the ego, the smaller the package. And, fuck. With your ego, it must be fucking miniscule.’
Jesus stood, dropped his dacks, and the remainder of his dignity, and said ‘So go fuck yourself, Danny,’ as his 7 inches of glory stood to attention. Melanie and Geri’s jaws dropped, but they didn’t say anything. But they didn’t take there eyes off it until he started dressing again.
Later that evening, Melanie was next to Geri. ‘He’s got a good un, asn’t he,’ Melanie said with a thick English accent.
‘It’s a smasher,’ responded Geri.
‘I almost fancy him,’ said Melanie.
Geri smirked. ‘In bed with God. Very weird, Melanie C. Very weird,’ and the two girls burst out laughing.
* * * * *
‘Love don’t live here any more,’ said Yesh.
‘Really,’ said Daniel, not taking his eyes of Sonic in the duel between Sonic, who was Yeshua, and Luigi, who was Jovius.
‘The Lady Antebellum song,’ said Yesh. ‘Apparently you love the song? Listen to it very, very often?’
Daniel looked at him. ‘One of my favourite albums. One of the few which lasted with me. Their first one.’
‘Whatever albums do you have?’ Yesh asked him.
‘Something to Remember. By Madonna. Reason by Melanie. Goodbye Lullaby by Avril Lavigne. I have nearly 30 eternal CDs now. They are made of Eternya. They are the ones which I have stuck with so far over the long haul.’
Jesus nodded. ‘What are they? The full list?’
Daniel looked at Sonic beating Luigi, and went to the other room to grab his CD rack. He returned and started speaking.
‘Right. Safe Trip Home by Dido. Passion by Geri Halliwell. Northern Star, Reason, Beautiful Intentions, This Time & The Sea by Melanie C. Victoria Beckham self titled. L.A. State of Mind by Melanie Brown. Free Me by Emma Bunton. Life in Mono by Emma Bunton. Lady Antebellum self titled. Need you now by Lady Antebellum. In Blue by The Corrs. Goodbye Lullaby by Avril Lavigne. A Girl Like Me by Rihanna. Love Angel Music Baby by Gwen Stefani. Driver’s Seat by Tracy Kileen. Noah gave me that one. The Lighthouse by Amity Dry. Here we go again by Demi Lovato. Blondie’s greatest hits. Madonna by Madonna. Like a Virgin by Madonna. You Can Dance by Madonna. Something to Remember by Madonna. No Turning Back by Shannon Noll. A Million Suns by Shannon Noll. Fearless by Taylor Swift and Speak Now by Taylor Swift. And one CD Single. Everywhere by Michelle Branch.’
‘And that’s all?’ asked Jesus.
‘Yes,’ responded Daniel.
‘They are the only ones the theophany has permitted me to keep. Says I can’t have anymore of them. I have a small number of 12inch records and a small number of 7inch records as well. That is the entirety of my music collection. I don’t buy anymore now. I do watch the video hits and stuff, but I can’t have any more CDs.’
‘Why?’ Jesus asked again.
‘Just because. God says so,’ responded Daniel. ‘It doesn’t bother me. I listen to those ones and don’t worry about it anymore.’
‘And nothing else?’ asked Jesus.
‘Probably never again. It’s what I was told. The limit of my collection. So I don’t get greedy. Love them too much, apparently, or some such argument. So I have my Eternya CDs, and that is all I get.’
‘No Bon Jovi?’
‘Not on CD.’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’ he asked.
‘I have – other stuff. Some on an iPod, and quite a bit more on my PC. But that is finished as well.’
‘So what’s on your PC?’ he asked Daniel.
‘None of your business,’ responded Daniel, and said nothing more. Jesus eyed him cautiously after that.
‘Lighten up Danny,’ said the Theophany.
‘Sure thing God,’ responded Daniel.
‘Here is a bloody gift voucher. A million dollars. Go nuts. Buy as many CDs as you want.’
Daniel looked at the million dollar voucher. ‘Is that all? I like a lot of CDs.’
God ALMOST looked flustered. ‘Flubbergust,’ he said.
‘You know, Mel,’ Daniel said later that day. ‘I think I have finished my writing. 45 epochs of the Chronicles of the Children of Destiny. The Divine Mystery being the final 45th Epoch.’
‘Legendary,’ said Melanie, not taking her eyes of the TV set. ‘What’s next, then?’
‘Oh. I don’t know. Probably buy my CD collection and listen to a lot of music. Maybe play some more chess. Even start painting those miniatures more regularly.’
‘What about collecting things?’ she asked him.
‘I have enough crap,’ he responded.
‘Good to know,’ she said, and started rubbing his leg. ‘We could, you know,’ she said, a wink in her eye.
‘Well some things never bloody change in the end, do they,’ said Daniel.
And Melanie pinched his bum, and that, as they say, is that.
* * * * *
Daniel had lived for a long time. A very, very long time. And now, having, after aeons of aeons, concluded the ‘Chronicles of the Children of Destiny’, he was lost. Lost for something to do.
He was scratching around, the Theophany watching some TV, when God turned to him and said ‘Start again. Continue it anew. This time with a new title. Match the length of the first work. Life goes on, as they say, my dear son.’
Daniel stared at his God, stood, walked into the Lion’s den, sat down at the PC, and typed:
‘The Angels Saga – Book One ‘Morning Stars of Glory’
That should do, he thought to himself. That should do.
‘So what is the meaning of Life, Jesus?’
Jesus, sitting in front of the box, turned to Jovius. ‘Consult the Tanakh. That is SUPPOSEDLY the font of all wisdom.’
‘I couldn’t have said it better myself,’ commented the theophany, staring at the same television show.
Jesus turned to his God, looked at him squarely, and turned back to Jovius.
‘Well, there you go Jo. Study the Bible. The be all and end all of eternal wisdom.’
The theophany smiled a little. That pleased him.
Daniel spoke up. ‘The meaning of life is to buy as many of my books as possible, to make me the richest person in the universe. Therein is true meaning and happiness found in life.’
Melanie smiled. She had him. ‘And is this the same fellow, last year, who claimed to be a PILLAR of humility? Mmmmm.’
‘I humbly acknowledge my own greatness,’ responded Daniel, a grin on his face.
‘Humbly my butt,’ responded Melanie.
‘Oh. I like his books,’ said Gloryel.
‘They have SOME merit,’ commented the theophany.
‘For the backslider,’ commented Jesus snidely, which bought a vicious stare from Danny.
‘I like the Jovius stories,’ said Jovius.
Gloryel hugged Jovius. ‘Yes. They’re the best.’
‘The God stories are your supreme work,’ commented the Theophany casually.
‘I Like the Melanie and Daniel stories,’ said Melanie. ‘You show real talent there.’
And then, for the next 2 hours, they sat there, discussing Daniel’s books, the pros and cons of them all, and it was a happy little debate, the eternal and holy spirit of God listening with quiet satisfaction.
* * * * *
The Demon Lord ‘Hex’, who was a once follower of Satan, but went rogue, and developed extremely nasty streaks, surfaced from ‘Abaddon’, were he had been stranded in the eternal Maze of Torment, finally having found his way out, ready for some vengeance. ‘Daniel!’ he swore. ‘He’s the bastard who put me in here. I’m going to cut his fucking head off.’
And so the demon lord raged, started flying upwards, towards the heavenlies, ready for his vengeance, ready for his glory.
* * * * *
Geri looked at the chips. ‘Oh, god,’ she moaned. ‘Is this it? 1 million years loading crappy fries? There must be something better. But, no. I am committed.’
And so, picking up the bag of fries, steeling herself to her commitment, she went through another day’s drudgery.
Later on, in the afternoon, a funny looking fellow – assuming a more material form, for he was actually the demon lord ‘Hex’, entered the store, ordered some fries, and spent half an hour eating them, staring at Geri out the back making her fries.
When she had finished for the day he found her out the back, and returning to his spirit form, he flew after her vehicle as she made her way back to were he was told was Daniel’s abode.
Melanie was in the kitchen, making a cake, and she had a cup of flour in her hand. The demon Hex was hovering at the ceiling, invisible, and slowly descended, about ready to attack her, when Jovius came in, smiled at Melanie, but tripped and pushed her. They both fell, but her cup of flour went flying in the air and spurted all over the demon Hex, who started spluttering, then turned back invisible and flew into the other room.
‘Sorry about that Mel,’ said Jovius.
‘Don’t worry about it,’ she responded.
Gloryel was hanging the new curtains, Jesus helping her, when she slipped and the curtains went flying. Hex, who had burst into the room, was soon covered with the curtains, and flew around like a ghost momentarily, before again turning invisible, spluttering, and going off into the next room.
There he was Daniel, sitting next to a funny old looking fellow.
‘So, Daniel. How are things?’ said the Theophany.
‘Oh, well enough,’ responded the Seraphim, staring at the TV sets.
‘No worries, no concerns. NO FEARS?’ asked the theophany.
‘Nothing at all,’ responded Daniel.
‘Right,’ said the theophany, making his decision.
Hex materialized behind the couch were Daniel was sitting, picked up a lampshade, ready to smash it over the head of the unsuspecting Seraphim, when the Theophany, smiling to himself, acknowledging that his son had kept the faith long enough, continued staring at the TV, clicked his fingers, and suddenly the lamp fell to the ground, the demon Hex having disappeared.
Daniel jumped. ‘What the hell was that?’ He stood, found the lamp and looked at God. ‘Now what the hell caused that?’ he asked.
The Theophany shrugged. ‘Strange things often happen, Daniel San. Strange things often happen.’
‘Go figure,’ said Daniel, staring at the lamp.
A million miles away, again stuck in the Maze of Torment, the demonlord Hex was cursing Daniel over and over and over again. ‘I will get that f#$$$ #^^% (**** son of a *(^*& if it is the last thing I (*&^(*&^( do, he boasted, and continued to swear for the rest of the day, as the old tormentors found him and continued their delightful, yet tortuous, occupation.
‘I suppose the meaning of life,’ began Jovius, in front of the group, who were watching ‘It’s a Knockout’, is to be a good person in the end. If you are good, good things will happen to you. I suppose it as simple as that in the end.
‘Sounds good,’ said the Theophany.
‘If that is what you think,’ commented Jesus.
‘You are wise,’ said Melanie.
‘Brilliant,’ responded Geri.
Daniel looked at him for a while, then turned back to the TV. ‘As long as you buy a copy of my ‘Morning Stars’,’ he said, a grin on his face.
And Jovius almost smiled.
* * * * * *
Hex looked at the doorway. He hadn’t seen this one before – the coding system looked different. He was, again, at the bottom of the maze of torment, another million years of climbing levels, tormented by minor faerie demons, looking for drink and water were he could find it, although he would survive either way. The Maze of Torment was were God threw many of his demons who sinned. Who sinned too greatly to be trusted – to be allowed to inhabit the mainstream. Hex didn’t care, though. He was a bad boy. Bad to the bone.
He looked at the doorway, and noticed 3 symbols above it. He punched the datapad, punching in the three symbols, and the doorway glowed.
‘What the hell,’ he said, and stepped through.
* * * * *
‘How many copies of Morning Stars then?’ asked Jovius.
‘One a century keeps my sales figures up,’ said Daniel, still grinning.
‘I have an Eternya copy,’ said the Theophany, casually.
‘I know,’ said Daniel, sighing. ‘I shouldn’t have caved, and given you one. Even though you claim it’s your favourite book. Now I won’t get any more sales figures from you.’
‘Look before you leap,’ responded the Theophany.
‘Don’t I know it,’ responded Daniel.
* * * * *
Hex materialized in front of Daniel’s abode. ‘Fuck,’ he swore. ‘That was lucky.’ Time to get the bastard – this time for sure.
* * * * *
‘You know, Danny,’ said God. ‘There is a demon trying to kill you.’
Daniel stared at God, and the rest of the group looked stunned.
‘Uh, trying to kill me,’ said Daniel the Seraphim.
‘Aye. Ole Hex. I have decided to let him have another go. He was just here. I have decided, though, you can sort this one out.’
‘Where is he?’ asked Daniel.
God looked at the clock. ‘Well, he should be coming through the front door right now.’
Suddenly there was a crashing noise, and Hex appeared. He looked mad.
‘Whatcha gonna do?’ the Theophany asked Daniel.
Hex glared at Daniel, but Jovius had stood to his feet and was standing next to him. Jesus looked unconcerned, staring at the TV set, and the girls looked cautious.
‘You banished me to the Maze of Torment,’ glared Hex at Daniel.
‘I can explain,’ said Daniel. ‘You were trying to kill me.’
‘Excuses,’ growled Hex.
Daniel thought quickly. ‘I know you must have suffered. I can understand. And it has been a while.’
‘A million years,’ growled Hex again. Jesus smiled, not looking, but smiling, keeping his eyes on the TV set.
‘What do you want?’ asked Daniel.
‘To kill you,’ responded Hex.
‘Oh,’ said Danny, disappointed.
God seemed to be enjoying the show.
‘Can we negotiate?’ asked Daniel.
The demon glared, and suddenly softened, sat down next to Melanie, stared at the TV set, and said, so casually, ‘10 million credits. I know you are good for it. Fork it over and we can be besties. God doesn’t seem to be in the mood to casting me back to the Maze, so I will give you a break. He might let me be.’
‘Your repentance is sufficient,’ said the Theophany, again casually.
Daniel did some mental cogitations. He had money – lots of it. He didn’t like many knowing, though. Time to negotiate.
‘1 million,’ said Danny.
‘9 million,’ responded Hex.
‘3 million’ said Danny.
‘5 million,’ said Hex.
‘It’s a lot, but OK.’
Hex smiled, stood, and turned to God. ‘Can you lend me some cash until he gets the payment to me. I’m good for it.’
God stood, opened his wallet, and produced 500 Credits in notes. ‘Keep it,’ said God. ‘And be good.’
Hex glared at Daniel. ‘I’ll be back in a week, mate. Make sure you have my cash.’
As the demonlord left the abode, Jovius sat down, returned his stare to the TV set, leaving Daniel and Melanie looking at the broken doorway.
‘Can you afford it?’ she asked him.
He said, quietly, ‘I have googols of cash – literally. It got rid of him. I won’t sweat it.’
Melanie smiled. She was grateful for a rich husband. It was always the way to go in a spot of bother.
Daniel came back into the room and looked at God. ‘You were a great help.’
‘Well, what will happen if I don’t always get your back?’ asked the Theophany.
Daniel didn’t respond, but acknowledged the point. What if God WASN’T there when he needed him most? What if?
They had the door repaired, and Hex showed up as promised, and Daniel handed him a suitcase full of cash. Hex glared at him, but Daniel kept silent. One problem out of the way, he thought to himself, but God’s words were on his mind. They were definitely on his mind.
‘Do daah do daah do daah,’ for half an hour, and she watched him, and smiled to herself. There he was – Daniel – her beloved, off in a little world, playing ‘Crazy Rage 497’ – one of the REAL long ones – humming to himself, as said, in a little world of his own. Melanie wondered what made men tick, then, for the trillionth time. They could be so romantic, so loving, so perfect, and then they would escape to their own little world were bragging rights over the highest score on Crazy Rage was not LIFE – it was an OBSESSION. Men. But she couldn’t live without them, could she.
After a while she stirred from her couch in the lounge room, went into the kitchen to find some of the cold chicken and soft drink from last night’s meal, to find Jovius and the Theophany at the table, playing chess.
‘He’s winning,’ said Richard.
‘You’re not doing too badly,’ said God.
‘Remember, I don’t play this game much,’ said Jovius.
‘I do know,’ responded the Theophany.
Melanie got the chicken out of the fridge, munched on some of the wings, and looked at the two of them. Boys with toys. Good grief.
Finishing her chicken she grabbed a can of coke and wandered out to the back yard. Jesus was sitting with Geri on the swing, chatting. At last – a sensible man.
She sat down on the couch near them, and listened in.
‘…..which is the all time record on Crazy Rage 992. It took me over a million years of concentrated effort, but I cracked the top slot.’
Jesus. Boasting of his high score on a computer game to Gloryel. Melanie almost smiled at the irony of life. Almost.
* * * * *
Melanie sat on the couch, again, staring into space. It was a quiet day, gentle, nothing much to do. The sky outside was grey and overcast. The mood inside was similar. Daniel was on the large couch in the lounge with her, snoozing. He snored from time to time, and was currently doing as such, but she didn’t mind.
The Theophany was out the front, on the front swinging couch, talking with Jovius about whatever it was they talked about.
Jesus was upstairs in his room, doing his thing.
And Gloryel was in the kitchen, working on a turkey, and other assorted food items, for a big feast that afternoon she had promised everyone.
Really – everything was good. Everything.
As she sat there she thought on life. What was it all about, then? Was there really a purpose to it? Was there some grand mystery she had yet to really figure out? Or was it, as Daniel suspected, simply going through the motions, passing the time, till the paycheck cleared and you could have a good dinner at ‘Fabio’s’ and a night of dancing. Very funny, she thought to herself. But was he right?
Filing in time – an extravagant life, but mainly about filling in time. Eternal time.
So, really, as her beloved would say, find the things you like doing, and do them. Make yourself happy.
She had, she presumed, done that. But was something lacking? Was there anything else left for Melanie Chisholm? She sat there, thinking deep thoughts, almost ready to write a psalm about them, when reality interfered, the smoke alarm in the kitchen started ringing madly, and Geri burst in claiming she had burnt the turkey.
‘Here we go again,’ thought Melanie to herself, as life returned to its more regular course of action.
* * * * *
Melanie sat there, listening to ‘Angel’ pour out her heart. She was a new girl, in heaven, arrived from earth a few months ago. Had died of a drug overdose. Her heart was in tatters.
‘Why drugs?’ asked Melaniel.
‘Nobody cares,’ said Angel.
‘God cares,’ responded Melanie.
‘You almost make me laugh,’ said Angel.
Melanie said nothing. Angel took out a cigarette, and said ‘The House of Broken hearts, huh? Well, grandma is paying, so I guess I can hang here for a while.’
‘Do you have someone in your life?’ asked Melanie.
‘Yeh. Ed. But he is still on earth.’
‘So you have someone to live for.’
‘Have you thought, maybe if you care about someone else or people more in general, then maybe karma will dish that back to you. You get what you give.’
Angel looked at her, nodded very slightly, but said nothing.
‘You expect love, right,’ said Melanie. ‘But doesn’t everyone? Isn’t everyone in those shoes? Thinking that it should come to them? Love attracts love in the end. Give it out, you’ll soon find it coming back.’
Angel looked at her, into her eyes. ‘I’ve tried that. Men just want your body. They don’t respect you.’
‘Then find a guy who will. Perhaps like Ed.’
She flicked her head. ‘Yeh, Ed,’ she said.
The conversation ran dry and Melanie looked at her, thinking what else she should say. But she was experienced at this kind of thing now. She had a few ideas in the bank.
She stood, put the kettle in the room on, and for the next 5 minutes waited till it boiled and made two cups of coffee. She gave one to Angel and asked her to come outside and sit in the garden with her.
When they sat Melanie began. ‘You know, Angel. Whatever else, in the end, life goes on. In the circle of eternity we find ourselves stuck in we go through it all, eventually, but life, inevitable, even inexorably as some say, simply goes on. We fill it in as best we can.’
Angel nodded, knowingly. ‘Your point?’ she asked her.
‘Well, without love. Without a soft heart. Well, a smooth ride can be a hell of a lot more difficult.’
Angel considered that point, and after a while sighed. ‘I guess I am just a bitch, then, Mel. Just a bitch.’
‘Then don’t be,’ said Melanie.
‘You think people change that easily,’ Angel responded.
‘No. I don’t,’ said Melanie. ‘Like everyone else, I know things take time. But this is really still your youth. Make the changes now. Don’t get stuck in a rut you will only hate yourself for later on. Make the positive changes before you get in the grind of life which becomes just that – a grind.’
Angel started another cigarette, and then put it out. ‘I guess I shouldn’t smoke so many of these,’ she said guiltily. Melanie said nothing.
‘Look, I know what you are saying, Mel. I’m just a dumbass bitch, ok. Just stupid.’
‘Then wise up,’ said Melanie.
‘Yeh, wise up.’
‘Yes,’ responded Melanie, and took a sip of coffee.
They sat there for a while, looking at the water feature, watching the birds feed. Melanie could sense her – some turmoil in her heart – some issues being dealt with.
Eventually Melanie spoke again. ‘I suppose, as many say, life is what you make it. If you want it a bitch, it will be. But if you put some effort in, anything is possible, sweetie. Anything.’
‘You make it sound so easy. You must have had hard times.’
‘But I don’t quite,’ said Mel.
‘No,’ said Angel.
The clouds overhead passed on by for a while, and Melanie sensed that Angel had had enough for the day. But she had a few words to finish with for the moment.
‘If there is somebody for someone, there is someone for you to, Angel. There is someone for you to.’
‘Thanks,’ said Angel.
‘Think nothing of it,’ responded Melanie C.
The Demon lord Hex looked at his bank account. Very, very good money. Fuck, may as well have another go at the cunt. See what more cash he could make.
Daniel was at home, sitting with Melanie in the back yard, God sitting not far away with Jovius, playing chess. The others were inside, when Hex strolled around the corner of the back yard.
‘What do you want Hex?’ Daniel demanded instantly.
God didn’t look up from his chess game.
‘Cashola. Make it another 5 million alone and I will leave you alone for a while.’
Daniel stared at him, then stared at God, who said nothing, then went inside, returned with his cheque book, and wrote out a cheque for 5 million credits. Hex smiled, nodded at him, and disappeared.
‘So you going to put up with this,’ said Melanie.
‘No,’ said Daniel, looking at God, who said nothing. ‘No. I’ll deal with it.’
‘You better,’ she said.
4 weeks later Hex was back. Daniel looked at him. ‘It’s like this Hex. You are a bogey guy to me, but I have a spell of banishment to the Maze of Torment permitted to me for use by God in emergencies. He may disdain sorcery greatly, but in extreme circumstances, to save life, he doesn’t object greatly for myself. So its like this. I understand you went through a lot of shit down in the Maze, and I am partly to blame. And, perhaps, the punishment was too much. So perhaps you deserve some of my cash. The deal is this – I will give you one final payment of 25 million credits. Take that, and we are square. It is quite a lot of cash, and we leave it at that. You keep it, I won’t banish you to the maze of torment, and we are square.
Hex glared at him, and Melanie, sitting next to the Theophany on the couch, nodded at Daniel approvingly.
‘I was in that maze for a long time. It was hell. 100 Million credits, and I really won’t bother you again.’
Daniel looked at the demonlord, and decided to test out God on this issue. He walked over to the Theophany and stared at him. ‘Compensation? He went through too much crap? I owe him?’
The theophany looked up at Daniel and smiled. ‘It is one way of dealing with the situation, I suppose. You could have a go, though, son. Couldn’t you.’
Daniel thought on that, and the trouble it could bring him. A life of hurt, potentially, fucking around with a demon and his posse. He thought it over, and made a fresh decision.
‘Ok, Hex. The answer is go fuck yourself. No more cash. Nada. You fuck with me, I send you back to the Maze. Every fucking time, ok. Every fucking time.’
The demon Hex glared at him again, but got the point. The kid had spellcraft. Best not to fuck with him.
As he stalked off, the Theophany looked up at him. ‘Sometimes you may have to fight guys like that, Daniel. Evil doesn’t always quit so easily.’
‘No. No it doesn’t,’ responded Daniel, thinking over things.
Melanie came up to him, hugged him, relieved that the situation had been dealt with. For now.
* * * * *
Geri looked at the paycheck. 2 years she had been at this, now, and the pay really wasn’t that crash hot. Sure, she had a lot of other money, but if she had to rely on this crappy wage how would she be able to afford anything. How the other half live, she thought depressingly to herself.
She picked up her backpack, went back to the front of the store, and with the form she had obtained from the manager that morning, sat down and started filling in the application for junior manager’s position. 2 years, most workers having come and gone in her time, she now the oldest apart from the manager. Perhaps she had earned it. The position had become available, so she may as well try for it.
She filled in the standard details, put down her recent experience in working for ‘Captain Jack’s’ and hoped for the best. Perhaps she would be lucky – perhaps.
As she drove home, looking out at the city, she felt she was, in the end, still doing the right thing. Doing this work – a million years of it – to pay some dues. Life was eternal, in the end, and how could she ever really justify eternal luxury when somebody had to pay for, no matter how hard she had once ‘Put it in’ to earn her glory, literally. No, she knew she didn’t have to slog it out forever, and those who did, in the end, usually ended up with some kind of land package for rental’s somewhere out on the edges of heaven, our finally found a share portfolio which lasted. In the end, the newbies payed for the oldies, and over time everyone found their paradise. It just took time. But, as far as Gloryel was concerned, she wanted to leave nobody doubting that she had paid her dues and earned her rest. Nobody. So she would work this million years, slave it out, and then, dues paid, more happily and eternally enjoy the privileges of her wealth that, by then, she would have well and truly earned.
* * * * *
Melanie was sitting with Angel. ‘So, do you have plans, yet? What you want to do with your life?’ asked Melanie.
‘Get high, I suppose. Nothing else to do. Didn’t expect to make it here, really. Heaven I mean.’
‘I get that,’ said Melanie. ‘A lot more people than you think express similar thoughts. No real belief in God. Surprised that he allows them in.’
‘I mean, why would he? We were sinners, weren’t we?’
‘Why do you think that, Angel?’
‘You know the kind of shit I’ve done. Everyone does. Society frowns on girls like me.’
‘Nobody frowns on you,’ said Melanie. ‘That is not how we think.’
‘Then what is?’ asked the Angel.
‘We think you’re a good girl in a bad situation. Nothing more. You just need some help.’
‘Oh,’ she said.
‘Let’s go outside, again. I think we talk more honestly out in the garden,’ said Melanie.
Sitting there, Angel decided to get something off her chest.
‘I only did drugs coz of my step-dad. He used to fuck me when mum wasn’t there. I mean, he was actually cute, and I was 14 when we started, so I was kind of old enough in some ways. I didn’t mind. He was my first. I liked him, in some ways. Thought we’d be together in the end.’
‘But that was a dream?’ Melanie asked.
‘Mum found out. She divorced him and kicked me out of home. I ended up on the streets after that.’
‘Oh,’ said Melanie.
‘Yeh, oh. But that’s life, isn’t it. Go start getting yourself some dreams and life kicks you in the arse. I tracked him down, you know. Mark. My step-dad. Told me to fuck myself. Didn’t want a skanky little ho like me hanging round, apparently. Had a girl with him as well. Probably not much older than me.’
‘He was bad news, then,’ said Melanie.
‘I guess,’ responded Angel. ‘I loved him though. I think I still do.’
Melanie looked at Angel, who’s eyes had misted over. There was a lot of junk in this girl’s trunk. That much was obvious.
‘Well, Mark probably won’t be available any time soon. And he might not like you ever again, anyway.’
Angel nodded. ‘Probably. Your probably right. Just me and my fantasies.’
‘So life goes on, right,’ said Melanie.
Angel vaguely nodded.
They were quiet for a while, and Melanie sensed she didn’t really need to do anymore prodding today. Things had been aired, and Angel was perhaps dealing with some issues. Best to leave her alone. Give her some quiet time. There was always next week’s session.
Driving home from Citydale that night, she thought on her own life and how, in comparison, perhaps lucky she had been. She had good friends. Friends who wouldn’t abuse her for her body, her looks. And a devoted man, Daniel, who, while he had others loves in his life, inevitably came back to her for a good long time as well.
She was fortunate, she thought to herself. Very fortunate.
Jovius looked at the chess book. It had come down to this – studying a bloomin chess book to try and beat God. How low had he sunk? Still, if people were willing to offer up their gems of wisdom in how to win at a game which, for Jovius, was once incomprehensible, then who was he to stare a gift horse in the mouth.
The book had classic ‘Pitfalls’ for introductory players, but even Jovius knew most of them, and was sure God would laugh. He needed something different, something cunning, a classic strategy. And then, turning to the ‘Pearlers’ page, he found an odd looking sequence of opening moves, and a strategy underlined, which seemed a goer. God was ancient at the game, and Jovius far less so, but perhaps he would give this highlighted tactic a go. You never know – he might scrape his first victory yet.
He studied the book for most of that morning, going over ideas in his mind, and even trying out one of Daniel’s electronic chess games, utilizing the strategy against it. The computer must have been easy, even though he did select level 1, because he thrashed it. It had 22 levels so, perhaps, for the next few months he would challenge it, improve his game, and if he could beat level 22, attack the Most High God. Hey, with God, all things were possible. Or so the saying went.
* * * * *
Daniel sat with Melanie, in front of the TV, watching the ‘L.A. State of Mind’ documentary, which was the doco for Melanie B’s album ‘L.A. State of Mind.’
‘I had a weird dream, once, about this,’ said Daniel. ‘The first night after I watched it for the first time. I dreamed of Amber Café, who produced the album, and there were these Melanie B fans there as well. We were in a modern looking office, and Melanie B was there, and one girl, one of the fans, said it was going to put Urban Groove back to number one. It was a very funky dream. I had just bought the album for the first time not much earlier.’
‘You like all us Spice Attack girls, doncha?’ queried Melanie.
Daniel went silent.
‘Come on. Admit it. You fancy us all.’
‘I am hopelessly devoted to you,’ responded Daniel.
‘And Geri,’ said Mel.
Daniel said nothing.
‘Come on. Tell me the truth.’
Daniel, finally, confessed. ‘There are 7 girls in my life. 7 special girls, I call my Ark. Madonna is at number 1. The 5 Spice Girls, in order of birth, from 2 to 6. And my niece Georgia at number 7. I call them my Ark. Like Noah’s Ark. There were 8 people on Noah’s Ark, so counting me, that is my own personal Ark.’
Melanie was curious. ‘Which means what, Danny?’
‘In the end, the ones I am most devoted too. I can’t actually marry my neice Georgie, which would be weird, but she has a special place in my heart. It’s just the way it is.’
‘Madonna, huh,’ said Melanie, a little jealous. ‘She is number one, huh?’
‘You are all equal. The ranking is based on birth order, from oldest to youngest.’
‘Oh,’ said Melanie. And then she snuggled up next to him, kissed him, and said ‘Well that is good to know. But when did you choose this ark?’
‘Aeons ago. On earth. When I was young. It will never change. Just the way it is.’
Melanie kissed him again and Daniel, finally relieved to have told her, no longer felt so stupid about the love of his heart. In the end you had to confess these things, didn’t you? Didn’t you?’
* * * * *
Madonna looked at the email from Melanie C of the Spice Girls. ‘Your man Daniel likes me?’ she queried to the email. ‘Weird. I don’t know if I have ever met him. Oh, that is Daniel the Seraphim isn’t it,’ she said to herself.
And then the Queen of Pop continued reading about Daniel’s special Ark and thought to herself, this guy might be someone worth getting to know.
* * * * *
‘Do you have an ego, Daniel?’ Jovius asked Daniel.
‘What makes you say such a thing, Rich?’ queried Danny, not taking his eyes of his man in Road Rash 2.
‘Jesus says so.’
Jesus, sitting next to Daniel, smiled to himself. ‘Oh, just some friendly banter, Dan. You know me.’
Daniel kicked Jesus, who kicked him back.
‘No, I don’t have an ego,’ responded Daniel.
‘Apparently you have this list of 50 girls, who you have made a point of ultimately marrying – your long term goals, or something like that.’
Daniel almost swore. ‘How the effing heck did you find out about that? I have never told anyone.’
Jovius confessed. ‘The Theophany mentioned it. Last night. To Jesus. Jesus told me earlier.’
Daniel kicked Jesus again. Jesus kicked him back, just a little softer.
‘Who are they?’ asked Jovius.
‘None of your business,’ said Daniel, returning to his game.
‘Why 50, then?’
‘1 per week, with 2 weeks off at the end of the year,’ responded Daniel casually.
‘Gee, that will impress them,’ said Jovius. ‘How about choosing just one. Like a NORMAL person.’
‘Tell that to Shlomo.’
‘Who?’ asked Jovius.
‘Solomon,’ responded Daniel.
‘Oh. I get the point,’ responded Jovius, and said nothing more.
Jesus picked up the issue. ‘God told me the names. The full list. Your dreaming, Danno. Some of them are hopelessly devoted to their men.’
‘It’s a long eternity,’ responded Daniel. ‘And I am a patient guy.’
‘Meludiel is one of them. So is Ariel. And Kayella, if I am not mistaken. That will impress Callodyn, I am sure.’
‘Callodyn can find other ladies. He won’t mind,’ responded Daniel.
‘And David?’ queried Jesus. ‘Are you sure he will ever relent on his twin?’
‘It has been a long war,’ responded Daniel.
‘Which you are currently losing, if I am not mistaken,’ responded Jesus, smiling. ‘David is with her these days, even more loyal than ever.’
‘She always goes back to Jacob Fink anyway, when she is finished with David,’ responded Daniel. ‘And then she wants a normal, non-Jewish guy after that. And, voila, Daniel san is available. She will eventually gravitate to her own kind.’
‘Still a Christian, though, isn’t she,’ responded Jesus, looking at the game.
‘Noah will get her in the end, JC. Jus you wait.’
‘We’ll see,’ responded Jesus, as Daniel’s character crossed the line in first place.
(Warning: Saucy Stuff in this chapter)
‘Give me a reason, cause passion is in season.’
Daniel looked at Geraldine, lying naked on the bed, her legs spread, her fingers to her mouth, the lights dim, the soft music of Madonna’s ‘Erotica’ album playing, gazing upon him.
‘Give me a reason for what?’ he asked her.
‘Oh, I was just being cool,’ she responded. ‘Now, Melanie is away, with the others, for their day trip. As you know. I called in sick, and you have emails to answer, so nobody suspects anything.’
‘I’m a married man, Geri. Hopelessly devoted to Melanie Chisholm.’
Geri stood, came over to him, and started unbuckling his belt. Shortly she had him naked, and got down on her knees. She took his manhood, and started slowly pumping it. Soon it was quite erect.
She stuck out her tongue, almost ready to touch the nib, and looked at him. ‘Are you SURE you are hopelessly devoted?’
He looked down at her, but said nothing. Nothing could be said. And then she placed the tip of her tongue on his phallus head, rubbed it around the curvature of the top and then, suddenly, smothered his phallus with her mouth, cradling his balls, going wild on him. He surged, very quickly, and erupted into her mouth.
‘Now I feel guilty,’ said Daniel, basking in the glow of the aftermath.
‘You still have some work to do,’ said Geri, on the bed, her legs spread.
‘A Danny’s work is never done,’ said Daniel, and got onto the bed, proceeding to take a Spice Girl to the highest level of divine bliss.
* * * * *
Melanie looked at the bed. It was well made. TOO well made. Far TOO well made. She smelt the air, and sensed as best as she could. And then she walked out, looked at Daniel on the PC, and looked at Ger, sitting innocently, watching TV. Geri, gingerly, turned to Melanie, and said ‘Oh, you are back.’
Melanie Chisholm wasn’t a stupid lady. ‘Your feeling better, I see.’
‘Oh, yes. It was just a little tummy bug.’
‘I’ll bet,’ said Melanie C, under her breath.
Daniel intervened. ‘Me and Geri went out. To McDonalds. We had some burgers and fries. It was good. We got back and she has been watching TV, and I have been on the PC.’
‘And that is all that has happened?’ asked Melanie, still suspicious.
Daniel thought quickly.
‘Oh, we tidied up a little bit. Geri did the bedroom and I, uh…’
‘Yes,’ she said.
‘Oh, well I have been cleaning up my hard drive.’ Fuck, he thought to himself, that was kind of pathetic.
Melanie went into the kitchen, and came back with a carrot and a knife. She sat down on the couch, looking at Daniel.
‘You know, Danny. I trust you implicitly,’ she said, starting to peel the carrot. ‘And I know you would NEVER cheat on me.’
‘Oh. Oh of course. Never, ever, ever. Even in a million years,’ responded Daniel.
‘Which is good,’ said Melanie. ‘Because if you EVER did,’ and she proceeded to cut the head off the carrot, which fell to the ground, with a shocked Geri and Danny looking at the carrot head, with Daniel’s hands instantly going protectively to his crotch.
‘Is THAT clear,’ said Melanie C.
‘Perfectly,’ responded Geri, and Daniel gulped.
* * * * *
Hex was in a bar, on the dark side of Joniquay, brooding. Money, he had heaps now, but he was pissed. Pissed off. With Daniel. The threat was getting to him and, although he feared the Theophany of God who was living with that group for the time being, he was not sure if he cared. He would get even, if it killed him.
He brooded, and brooded, and brooded, and had brooded enough.
‘Fuck it. I’ll have a go at him. Fuck it.’
* * * * *
Madonna Ciccone walked through the airport, a scarf over her head, sunglasses on, looking as inconspicuous as possible. But that was necessary – one of the major stars of the heavenlies, known by everyone, ancestor of Aquariel the Seraphim, she was in demand.
But she was a woman – on a mission. To meet this Daniel the Seraphim who she had never quite met yet, and see just what was in his heart. Wether he, indeed, was the one her heart craved for stability and a soulmate.
She ordered a taxi, gave her Melanie’s address, and as it buzzed along through Joniquay she looked out, remembering her memories of this city.
‘She was so old, now. So many were. So many ancients, who had lived aeons, being born, time and again, to a new world, a new life, a new fantasy. But, in all that time, she had not really connected, in her innermost heart, to the one who was for her. She had never, quite, found the one to love her completely and accept her as she was. There had been men, ones she had married, who had gone off eventually, found other soulmates. And while she missed them in her own way, she had to acknowledge that they hadn’t been right for her in the end.
But Daniel – Seraphim Daniel – claimed she was special to him. Perhaps this one, this Angel of Glory, the Arch Regent from the Realm of Eternity. Perhaps he had something to offer her which, so far, she had failed to find amongst the children of men.
The car drove along, and she lit a cigarette, scolding herself for it was the second that day, which she had foresworn long ago, but she was nervous, anxious, wanting to see who the spirit had suggested would be a good mate for the Queen of Pop.
(Warning: Saucy Stuff in this chapter)
‘You know, Daniel. I am VERY experienced at lovemaking.’
Daniel looked into the eyes of his number one girl, with her freshly peroxided hair, and erect nipples. He touched them. They felt wonderful.
‘Madonna, Madonna, Madonna. Something tells me, some musical spirit tells me, we have met before. In a funny kind of way.’
The song ‘Vogue’ started playing on the CD player, and Madsy smiled. ‘Whatever gives you that impression?’
‘Nothing,’ he said, staring at her vagina. It had been shaved that morning. He put his tongue out, and flicked her clitoris. She moaned. ‘Did you like that?’ he asked her.
She put her hands on his head, and he proceeded to eat her, gently at first, and then rubbing her tits, pashed her womanhood with true passion, until she was shaking in ecstasy. His hot cock, erect, he guided into her quivering cunt, and thrust at her, like a beast, until she was screaming.
And then, opening her mouth, he put his cock inside, and steamy cum belted down her throat. She swallowed it all.
Later that evening, after they had showered, Madsy looked at him honestly. ‘Will you tell her.’
‘And risk my bollocks being mailed to Scotland. I don’t think so.’
‘She might find out.’
‘Will you tell her?’ he asked.
The Queen of pop shook her head. ‘No. I guess not.’
‘So don’t worry about it. I’m not cheating, seriously. Not in the end. I have, well, I shouldn’t say it. But there are girls who I intend to marry. I don’t go outside my list for sex.’
‘Really?’ she queried.
‘Yes. Not when I am married to one of them, anyway. When I am single, which is from time to time, I have been known to go to the red light district.’
‘How disgusting,’ said the Queen of pop. ‘My type of guy.’
‘Don’t I know it,’ he responded, lighting a cigarette. ‘Now, how about we bring in the girl we hired for the night. If you are ready for another dose.’
‘You are a deviate, aren’t you Daniel the Seraphim.’
‘Takes one to know one, Madonna Ciccone.’ And Madonna smiled, acknowledging the point.
* * * * *
The Theophany was not normally in the habit of rebuking Daniel, but when he fronted the following morning, Madonna in tow, Melanie was sitting with God on the couch, and looked at the two of them. She seemed to be in the know.
Madonna sat down, smiled at God, and Daniel looked guilty. God started speaking.
‘You know, Daniel. Marriage is a sacred bond. Between man and woman. It, in the traditions established, is meant to be honoured as a place for true love and affection. Children are raised in faithful homes, and good and decent lives are lived. It is NOT a place for debauchery.’
Daniel felt VERY guilty.
God went silent for a while, letting Daniel stew.
Then he spoke.
’50 girls is a lot, you know Daniel. Are you sure you can handle that many? Are you sure the ones on your list will commit to YOU?’
He stuttered. ‘I, uh. I don’t know. It has just, really. Well, it was just an ancient idea I had which I have been sticking with.’
‘Then you don’t really love these ladies?’ God asked him.
‘No. No, I do like them. I am pretty sure I want to commit to each of them as well. Me and Madonna, last night…. Well,’ he said, looking guiltily at Melanie. ‘Well, we made love, and it was great. We get along really well.’
‘Mmm,’ nodded God. ‘That is not unsurprising. Madonna is a very loving lady.’
‘Thank you,’ said Madonna.
‘But perhaps FEWER ladies might be a better choice. Maybe 5 or 6 at most for a guy like you. I know you have a lot of love to give, and you are a very affectionate guy, but less is more, as people are often wont to say.’
‘But…’ began Daniel, yet God put his finger to his mouth to shoosh him.
‘Take your time, Daniel. Take a long, long time. The longer the better. Find girls who like you for you. Not fantasy girls, but ones who appreciate you as you are. The two girls in this room with us might be two of them. You never can tell in this funny thing called life. But not 50, Danny. Not 50. Shlomo has no end of headaches satisfying all his women, believe me.’
‘Oh. Well, ok, I guess. If you insist’ responded the Seraphim.
‘I do. Now, I think you have some explaining to do, so I will leave you alone until dinner.’
God stood, left the room, and Daniel, sitting with his latest flirt, looked at a very cross Melanie C.
‘Well, I hope you had a bloody good time,’ she swore at him, and stormed off.
‘Prices to pay,’ said Daniel.
‘Don’t I know it,’ responded the Queen of Pop.
* * * * *
Jovius finished the final move. ‘Checkmate, computer.’
The red buzzer went off and the computer said ‘Checkmate. Well done Challenger.’
Jovius was happy. Level 22, now finally defeated. He was ready, now. Ready for a real challenge. Ready to face the strategies of the Almighty. Could he beat him? Was he up for it? Would he be left quivering in a ditch of despair as the holy one shredded his ego.
Time would tell soon enough. Time would tell.
‘You kicked my ass, Jo. Well done.’
Jovius smiled. What an effort. 14 hours. All sweat, nerves, and fingernails. But he had done it. By Jove, he had done it.
* * * * *
Daniel was in the back yard.
Hex was suddenly there. Daniel reached over, pulled out the machine gun, smiled at the devil as he approached, and pulled the trigger.
Demon guts splattered everywhere.
Hex didn’t fuck with Daniel again.
Melanie was proud of him.
Everything worked out for good.
The writings of Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly, finally, resolutely, and absolutely once and for all are finished (Maybe, but probably not. I’m just being dramatic).
Elimelech was a soul, at this point in his sojourn, contemplative. He studied history, of the Moabites in particular, largely that of the 'Remriddon' community - the divided city of the Realm of Infinity - where he dwelt. History gave answers - gained knowledge - which was to understand one's life and soul purpose in the wisdom Elimelech had obtained in life. Remriddon had a spirit to it - a unique and distinct animistic spirit - eternally linked with 'Memraic' realities, 'Logos' of eternal nature,' the name itself's progenerated spirit, coupled with the composition of nature through seed found in Remriddon, both flora and fauna, and indeed the artificial constructs of both mind and matter fashioned by those wisened souls whose acknowledged antiquity, often, could be measured in epochs of the divine's favour, such constructs parented as the essential infrastructures which made Remriddon exactly what it was - albeit, as life itself seemingly perpetually maintained, governed by that flux common to living and existing things.
That spirit (- that fluctuating spirit - to Elimelech's aspirations of intellectual integrity, operated through the concourses of history, to which the Moabites of Remriddon sanctified their existence to - all for the glory of Elimelech's heart, in his vanity, to enjoy, savour, and relish, the historical gems of wisdom gained through acquaintanceship with a long inhabitance, and keen sense devoted and operating towards such chronicled Annals of triumph -) was the source of pure and true delight for this Hebrew of Hebrews.
Yet, even the most dedicated of scientifical researchers, delighting in their profound and deeply moving observations of, how should I say it, life in motion, could not have been prepared to so radically reconstruct the most definite and acquired certainties of Moabite lord and custom which the wise and, perchance, wisened Elimelech found ncessary to consider that Thursday morning, in the Chapel of Yahweh, seated next to his former daughter-in-law, Ruth the Moabite, wife of Boaz of Bethlehem, ancestor of one of Israel's most cherished and blessed ruler's.
'Conversion to Moabitism?'
Ruth interjected. 'Return. Nay, father. Return. For Karaism has penetrated my heart by my neighbour Daniel and the literal absolutes of scripture, as he rightly told me would, wash away Danimic judgement if the cause is necessary!'
'Which means?' asked the bewildered Elimelech.
'There is no official legal conversion process. For a woman. Nothing completely and absolutely, well, well just that.'
'Absolute!' she finished.
'And why is that?' he asked her courteously.
'Coz I have no cock to cut,' she said in a sarcastic tone of Ocker Ozzie, Daniel, her neighbour, occasionally employed.
Elimelech's eyes lit up in concern.
'Because I have not penis to circumcise,' she continued in a more formal tone.
'Which means?' he asked.
'Which means Father Abraham can never own me absolutely. and thus, the old beast could always reclaim and, it seems, at last, it has.'
'Your Moabite roots,' said Elimelech soberly.
''E'en Ruth has some patriotism to her country,' she responded in equitable sobriety.
'Oh,' said Elimelech, silencing the discussion.
The two fo them sat there, silently, in the Chapel of Yahweh, Ruth looking casually at the stained glass windows, looking at the triumphant picture of 'Lot', sword in hand in his old typical swagger, the light of dawn shining through the windows, caressing the Moabites - and a spirit, a most distinct and unique Moabite spirit, suddenly and urgently reborn with a pride of the gods itself - lept into the heart of a community which had long forgotten one of the sweetest nectar's it had once gravely coveted and lost, but now returned, with a gift of consolation which Moab brimmed in with a pride like no other.
A flame in Zaphon went a new colour, saved for such ocurrences, and a theophany, lost on an expedition with Wormdog, softly, but joyfully, smiled.
Satan looked at the contract. The contract with God. His PERSONAL contract with God. He had him. He was 100% sure he had him. He consulted, firstly, with theologians. In the end they acknowledged the point. Secondly, the Sanhedrin itself. They reluctantly agreed that on certain technical points of view he had a claim, despite their revered devotion to Hashem. Finally, the esteemed Karaite Hakhamate.
It was an old Hakham, a wise one, after several months deliberation finally said to the Devil, 'At least let us take care of it. Have some mercy on the old foe.'
The Devil, albeit reluctantly, agreed.
* * * * *
The theophany tried to be brave. He wasn't. He wet and shit himself. The blade was large and heavy and, ironically, named 'TALMUD'. The Karaites had a sense of humour. As the blade descended, a lot of thoughts flashed through God's head. Why? Why? After all this time? And then a word appeared in his heart. To the merciless there will be no mercy. And the blade sliced off his head, and the theophany was gone forever.
* * * * *
'So you see, Ruth,' continued Satan. 'It was a contractual error. When Moab acknowledged your return it was interesting. But then so did the Rabbis and the Karaites also. Which is a violation of my contract of trust with God. He acknowledges certain protocols are honoured, you see. Certain 'Biblical' protocols.'
'Oh,' said Ruth, whose guilt had been incredible for the last year.
'Look, I'm sorry sweetie, but, frankly - well. Well I am the bloody Devil. So what do you expect? Huh? Huh? Huh?'
And Ruth, albeit reluctantly, acknowledged the fucking point.
Daniel - Callodyn - was in a good mood. It was like a weight had finally been lifted off his shoulders. A weight of abominable pride. Of festering, disgusting, abominable pride. A REAL devil was dead. A disgusting, perverted, malicious, sick, ugly and horribly revolting Devil was dead. It was a relief. In those early years of glory, Callodyn reflected the El Shaddai spoke to him more often. That something, which perhaps was not meant to be, was now gone. And, because of that truth, Normality had finally returned to the universe. And, in particular, to the heart of the Realm of Eternity.
Ruth was sitting with Ambriel, near the Terravon, in the heart of Eternity.
'It is an old system. The oldest, really. Michael summoned us. He's in charge now. Callodyn acknowledged the point, technically, with teh Theophany's death. So Michael has gone back to the old days, the old ways, when money wasn't around, and we shared and did our rostered work.'
'And its working?'
'I'm happy again. It's as if a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Like a bondage of slavery I never asked for, and never even wanted.'
'A lesson learned David?'
'A lesson learned, Ruth.'
'Circumcision is a cutting,' began the Hakham. 'From the Natural to the Supernatural. Do you understand Callodyn?'
'Yes. I'm not naive.'
'So El Shaddai never was the theophany to us. That was a Noahide reality.'
'I dispute that. I always knew El Shaddai.'
The Hakham looked at him, a cog of regular pride in his head ready to sneer intellectually, as it usually always had, but the 'Callodyn' cog said be careful, he's not stupid.
'Be that as it may, we have always served El Shaddai.'
'Of course, you always knew the mystery of life, didn't you? Like a homosexual I once knew claimed.'
The Hakham stared at him and blinked. THAT did not compute.
NOTE: Ruth IX to XII were handwritten. I destroyed them because they are saved for heaven only. You can read them in the next life.
NOTE: New Fill In Copies have Now Been Written to Replace the Destroyed Copies with Alternative Stories.
Ruth was undressing. Boaz walked into the bathroom. He sat down on the edge of the bathtub.
'You know,' began Ruth. 'You are my husband. But I'm about to have a shower. Do you mind?'
Boaz waved away her complaint. 'Wolfgang DeBear or Wolfgang Daly or whatever you want to call him is a pain in the arse.'
Ruth put on her gown, and sat on the chair in the bathroom. 'He claims he is the immutable son of Daniel Daly in flesh,' says Ruth. 'And the Firstborn Son of Jeremiah DeBear also. That he was miraculously conceived of the Holy Ghost, and that at his baptism in the United Pentecostal Church he had visions of Glory where the the world worshipped him as the Now Discovered Father of God Jesus, and that he is the God of Jesus God. The Eternal Higher Glory.'
'Complete bollocks,' said Boaz. 'All of that is complete bollocks.'
'Did you read the note at the end of the address. God's doctrines accommodate the faith and the heart of the congregations addressed at any given time. Caveat Emptor.'
'He panders to the special interest groups. And it's really sad,' said Boaz. 'One day he is the God of Heaven. Noah tells me he says that all the time. And the next day he tells me he is the God of Infinity. Cherubim Rachel shared that with me. He claims Infinity is his special chosen place, which Samael told her. But he boasts to Ambriel that his heart has always been in Eternity's Haven, Zaphon, and that he could never have another bride apart from her.'
'He tells them what they want to hear, dear husband. And he discloses that in the side notes. Get over it. It keeps the masses happy.'
'We deserve a better witness,' said Boaz, getting to his feet, and kissing Ruth on the forehead before leaving the bathroom.
'That's nice dear,' replied Ruth. 'Now I can finally have my shower.'
But as Ruth scrubbed away, for once she saw a point in Boaz her husband's righteous claims. They did deserve a better witness than that. But what could they do? Complain to God? She let it be, and scrubbed away, but later on in her bedroom, she took out a notepad, and wrote down 'Getting even with God', as a diabolical plan started forming in the heart of Ruth of Paradision.
'Do you have your passport up to date?' Ruth asked Boaz.
'Yes. Why?' asked Boaz.
'Start packing,' replied Ruth. 'We'll be gone several months. Take time off work. I will let you know what it is all about piecemeal fashion.'
'May I know where we are going?' asked Boaz, putting down his Paradision Express Newspaper.
'To the Realm Chief Libraries,' replied Ruth.
'Which ones?' asked Boaz.
'Heaven, Infinity & Eternity,' replied Ruth. 'I'm not sure I can get him on the other realms just yet.'
'Get who?' asked Boaz.
'Why God, of course,' replied Ruth.
'Mmm,' said Boaz. 'Ok. I don't know what you are up to, but if it is getting even with our Theophanic father I will support you on it.'
They booked certain visa arranged flights and called in some favours, and got the priority access they needed. In Heaven Ruth found a lot of interesting information, and researching the founding Divine Document Commitment charters she made several pages of notes. This was repeated in Infinity and in Eternity. And after filling out 3 full notebooks, she signalled she was ready to come home. Boaz, as of yet, had not queried exactly what her gameplan was all about, but he did trust that his wife was not stupid. There was something she seemed to have concluded, and that was enough for him. At this stage.
'Are you satisfied?' asked Boaz, the night they got back home, as Ruth was preparing the dinner.
'Yes,' she said. 'I think I have the information I need. Tomorrow, though, I want you to prepare yourself for a sensitive topic. I will bring it up after dinner.'
'I'll keep that in mind,' said Boaz.
They slept well, and Boaz got off to work, while Ruth researched most of the day, keeping her eyes on current affairs on issues involving the theophany of God, but she had reached a conclusion on a certain point which she felt would get the result she was looking for.
'Dear Boaz. How do I approach Satan on an issue?' she asked her husband.
Boaz, who was watching TV, looked at her. 'The solution to our problem is the devil? Look, I'm tolerant. I do believe in giving leeway. But we have a contract with Hashem. We don't go to the devil in our beefs with him. It's just not going to work.'
'Ok,' she said. 'But we don't have an ironclad contract with his Theophany. And his Theophany is subject to passions. And a certain passion is that he can get stubborn, and neglect things at times. And there are certain contractual obligations between God and the Devil which, now that I have the proof I need, can land the theoophany in some hot water.'
'With caution,' said Boaz, returning his focus to the TV. 'He's at that 666 Paramount Tower place. Go there. Tell them who you are. They'll probably allow you to speak with him. Before you come home go and get a Mikveh Taharah as I don't fancy that old beast's trickery, and want you purified before you come home.'
'Fine,' said Ruth.
She made the journey, and Satan let her in to his office.
'I see,' said the Devil.
'I could imagine the argument could be in your best interests. Warranting the cut, which you would I imagine probably delight in. There's a particular sword put aside for the task.'
'I know,' replied Satan. He looked at Ruth. 'Why are you telling me though? You're one of his dearest.'
'Every deadbeat deity needs a rebuke from time to time,' replied Ruth. 'And you can be our backdoor man.'
'Funny,' replied the Devil. 'Consider it job done.'
Ruth left, and returned home visiting the Ritual Baths in Citydale, before getting home to Paradision.
'Did you wash?' asked Boaz, kissing his wife when she came in.
'Spic and span,' she replied. 'Surprisingly he wasn't that evil. Had a moody presence though. I knew who he was alright.'
'I could well imagine,' replied Boaz. 'Well whatever you have planned I'm sure I'll find out soon enough,' replied Boaz.
'Oh, you'll find out,' said Ruth. 'Believe me.'
The deed ended up being done, and it was reported on on TV. The Theophany had been given the chop. It was not surprising, though, when he showed up on a news report a few months later, buzzing around, doing his standard things. He claimed Sheol had been interesting, but it wasn't quite his scene. 'Hard to kill a god,' he told reporters. Still, Ruth was satisfied, and Boaz enjoyed the explanation of things. Justice had been done in teaching the Theophany a lesson on fidelity. Time would tell if he got the point. Hopefully that would be the end of the issue. As cutting an issue as it had been. Naturally, Ruth had guilt, and questioned what she had done. Satan showed up after a while, and drove home the point, and a devilish point it was. But the deed had been done, and it was time to get on with life.
Satan was in a proud mood. He'd given God a good lesson. He felt strong. He felt tough. Even God reappearing on the news couldn't drag him down. Then Wolfgang showed up.
'He wants to come in,' said Satan's secretary at 666 Paramount Tower.
'God no,' said Satan. 'Get rid of the old bastard.'
The door suddenly flung open, and the Theophany of God stormed in. He had a stick with him. A cain by the looks of it. A teacher's cain.
'See this, adversary,' said God, holding up the Cain. 'Can you read that?'
Satan looked at the cain. 'Hitler. It has Hitler written on it,' he replied.
'It's mainly for someone else, but I'll use it on you to warm it up.'
Satan motioned for Samaen to hinder God, but Samaen retreated behind Marni.
'You're fucked,' said Marni to Satan.
'Shut up bitch,' replied the Devil.
'Come here ya varmint,' said God, and came over and grabbed Satan. He sat down on Satan's chair and pulled Satan over his knee, posterior facing him, and started whacking him on the butt. Once, twice, thrice. Then he relented and pushed the devil to his feet.
Satan rubbed his butt for a bit and glared at God. 'Hah hah, very fucking funny old fart.'
'You want another lesson?'
'No,' replied Satan a little more softly.
'That'll learn ya, ya varmint.' God looked over the room. 'Nice décor. Appropriate.' And he stormed off.
'Shit,' said Samaean. 'Glad that's over with.'
'No fucking kidding,' replied the Devil.
'He seems awfully pissed,' said Marni. 'And with a name like Hitler on the Cain you can only guess who's gonna get it next.'
And then Satan, putting two and two together, started chuckling, and then started laughing. A certain Hebrew Moabite was about to get her come-uppance.
'No, no, no,' said Ruth. 'Put Hitler down you bastard.'
'Ruthie!' exclaimed Boaz.
'He's not caining me with a cain called Hitler. I'll never live it down.'
The theophany menacingly approached Ruth in the kitchen, then softened. He retreated into the loungeroom and sat down. 'Bring me tea,' he said. 'And cookies.'
10 minutes later Ruth came in with fresh cookies and a pot of tea. She poured some out for God.
'Wolfgang,' said Boaz. 'Can we reason this out.'
Wolfgang took the tea, and ate a cookie. 'What's on TV?' he asked, picking up the remote control. He found the A Team. 'Good,' he said.
Ruth sat down and Boaz sat next to her. They watched the episode with God. Magnum P.I. Came on next.
'Love this classic 80s channel,' said Wolfgang. 'It's universal. Well, in most places.' He turned to look at Ruth. 'I don't think you know what a father sometimes has to do with each of his children. They all have to be the special one in their own way. It's just the way it is.'
Ruth nibbled on a cookie. 'We deserve a better witness.'
'People understand it Ruth. They don't really care about the witness of Israel when I am with them. They want to know about their own good deeds and how I appreciate them. The respect for Israel is a solid enough reality, and none of the other major groups object to your existence as a people. They just want to know that they are important too.'
Ruth poured out God some more tea. Magnum P.I. Finished, and the news came on. God watched it contentedly.
'I'll get dinner ready,' said Ruth.
'Can we have rich stew with dumplings?' asked God. 'I don't get that as often as I would like at Home.'
'Uh, not a problem,' replied Ruth. 'We'll have to eat a little later...'
'No problem with me,' replied God.
God hung around, and had dinner with them, and borrowed a bottle of Boaz's schnappz, before leaving. At the door he reminded Ruth 'A father has to relate to all his children, as diverse as they may be.'
And Ruth agreed on that point.
Ruth took out her notebook. She sat there, thinking. Point one. People deserved the truth. People deserved honesty. People deserved to know the things they way they really there. She wrote that down, and made some arguments on the idea. Point two. His people had served him a long time and deserved some respect for their identity. The Hebrew people also deserved some respect for their identity, as all people of Torah tradition did also. And finally, Point Three. God should still be showing them that they were the most important, the apple of his eye, as he swore to them in the traditions he would do so. She elaborated on all these points, and mailed off the final letter to Wolfgang at Home. There was a special postal service in Heaven which delivered to Home. It would get to him, and soon enough with her reasonable priority clearance. She sent the letter, and waited. A while later a reply came. Dear Ruth. First of all, you are correct in many assumptions. I do hold dearly the people of the book. But I don't and never really did exclude people. People have joined the Torah community in their own way for a long time now. The Kingdom of God has grown for a long time now. The idea you promulgate of Israel alone being my people is not correct. It is the righteous and those who serve love, law and truth which become my people, from whatever walk of life they emerge. And for such people, in the wars of doctrinal differentiation, I must allow understanding, and appreciate each group for its own merits. Please consider my reply. Your sincerely. Theo. Ruth sat there, for a while, having read the reply, and then filed the letter away in her personal collection of things she kept permanently. And then she got on with the rest of her day.
'I think I see his points,' said Boaz. 'He explained himself and his logic well enough. I suppose I'm satisfied.'
'I don't know,' said Ruth. 'It seems like a copout in some ways, but I do agree. The Jesus people we know well enough now anyway. They've gradually become family somewhat.'
'I always felt they would in the long term,' said Boaz. 'And Muslims don't have half the infighting they once had. I guess the Most High knows what he is doing in the end. It's our job to bear with these challenges, and I guess maybe not get too far ahead of ourselves in assumptions of our own self importance.'
Ruth smarted on that a moment, but relented. 'You're right, of course. If we really are all God's people, then we really are all that. God's people.' She sipped on her tea, and looked out the kitchen window. 'Just the way of the world,' she mused softly to herself. 'Just the way of the world.'
Ruth XI – Forthcoming
Ruth XII - Forthcoming
'Cally Wally. Your too much.'
Callodyn turned, found Luladiel in the room, in her mini skirt, no top on, and smiling at him.'
'God, Katy. Your scared the living fuck out of me.'
'I can put the living fuck back into you, if you like.'
'Ms Perry. Still a faithful christian I see.'
'Bite me,' she responded, and sat down on the couch, picked up a magazine on the Bulldogs which Daniel owned, and seemed lost in her own world. He sat down opposite her, noticed she didn't have knickers on, and that her crotch was showing, and smiled. She did that for him, these days. Showed that she loved him. Him, especially, so she claimed.
'Why me?' he asked.
'It was acknowledged, universally, dear brother, that the twin thing, in the end, was just the twin thing. It was simply an idea of God to ground us on a close sibling for our support. It doesn't mean I want Devuel to be my man forever. Me and Russ are not like that.'
'Oh,' he said.
'And I like you,' she finished, turning a page in the Bulldogs magazine.
'Why?' he asked.
She looked straight at him. 'Similar tastes in music. Same culture current spirituality mentality. Progressive, retaining enough genuineness. You usually, now, dress well enough for me. In ways I like. Perfect humour. My fellow pop girls like you. Your the author of my favourite books. And.......' she trailed off.
'Your very good looking. Ok. I said it. At your best you turn me on. I sort of, well, can't get you out of my system. I'm addicted to you. Your the British polish which does it for me, with your subtle accent which comes out occasionally, and your oh so snobbishly posh behaviour standards. Political correctness at its extreme.'
'Shaddup,' he said embarassed.
She stood up, pulled down her skirt, standing there naked, apart from her slip on shoes, and jumped in his lap. 'Fuck me,' she said.
He lifted her up, took her upstairs, and they proceded to be passionate in each others arms, Daniel slightly worried about his wife Mandy, who should be returning home soon. But he didn't care, at that moment, because, in the deepest part of Callodyn's soul, he remembered his dreams of Katy, and the impact she had made on him in that soulspark, and that she, even more than the oh so dramatic Kayella, had claimed his heart with unconquerable passion. He would always belong to Katy, but would, if he could, claim as many other lovehearts as possible. If he could.
'Daniel. Has someone been sleeping in here? Beside us?'
Daniel, lying next to Mandy, feigned innocence. 'Beside us? Not that I am aware of?'
'Are you sure?' she asked.
'Uh, yeh. I guess so.'
She said nothing more, but as he watched her shuffle about a bit in the bed, feeling the sheets, he could swear, as she turned the lights out, he heard her whisper the softest 'Bastard.' He could swear on it.
In the morning, it was business as usual, and when she left for work, after the cold atmosphere that had pervaded their Paradision home, he knew something was up.
And then the legal papers arrived just after midday, he signed them without even caring, without even giving a damn, mailed them off to her lawyer, and as she never bothered to show up again in the life of Daniel Daly, from his last eternal word of her, she drifting further and further outwards into the human heavenlies of planets, apparently with one of the legal covens, he looked at his pictures of Amanda Caldwell, sighed that a real love was now gone from him but, putting on 'The Complete Confection' that afternoon, knew exactly why. Time, inexorably, moves on again, he thought to himself. And what was, was not what would be.
Ruth was no longer with Boaz. She was being rebellious. She didn't care. She didn't care, even slightly. It was the Moabite in her. The emergine Noahide in her. And when he had offered her kindness and true hospitality that night, she had rebelled against it. She loved him, lots, and she wanted to accept his Jewish hospitality. But it was just that. That it was Jewish hospitality. For, although Ruth had lived untold aeons in the Jewish community, she was of that community, in truth, no longer. Moab had claimed her soul. Noah had claimed her soul. And while she knew, in the end, she would remain with Boaz, eternally wed to him, eternally a devoted wife, she would no longer be in the people of Israel as Jewish, but visiting her own congregation, her own Hebraic Moabite community, were she would find succour, find strengh for herself alone, and be one with the world, the universe and God.
She had to do it her way, or no way at all. Or no way at all.
So she started reading the Rainbow Bible, and chatting more and more often with Daniel next door who, ironically, was the early chief force in fashioning the Karaite Noahide faith and, while she knew so much more than the biblical stories, its ancient witness as a text still carried her through trying times, and with the Rainbow Bible, as she had slowly started accepting it as equal with Scripture, she found in much of its teaching a more realistic approach to Torah for a non-jewish person, more suitable to her own situation as a Moabite, and more real for her in her everyday practical life.
Strangely, what she needed most was right next door, right there in Paradision, and she sighed in the mornings as Daniel became a more permanent part of her life, and the Haven Noahide Fellowship community impacted more and more upon the heart and mind of Ruth the Moabite.
Taylor turned the corner, and walked the few hundred metres more, coming to the address. She was sure she had it right. She hadn't seen him, well, forever really. For so long. But she couldn't get him out of her heart. Daniel. Callodyn. The only one, now, after so many, which still loved her, from his last claims. So many she had gone through who, in the end, liked the money, the easy money, but moved on in the end because they found a more suitable girl. Someone more their style. Someone not so judgemental, as Taylor had been called time and time again by lovers who had gotten to know her, gotten to know her pride, and gotten over her. It was her problem. She was fabulously wealthy, but just could not keep a man. And her twin Steve had been married for eternity, practically now, and was off limits.
She had nobody.
She came up to the right number, looked at her slip and, calling on dutch courage, walked up, knocked on the door, and waited.
It was Luladiel who answered.
'Oh. Its you,' she said nervously.
'Uh, yeh,' said Katy. 'Funny, huh.'
'Your - together.'
'Forever,' said Miss Perry.
'Are you sure?'
'Positive,' she confirmed, holding the door closed somewhat. But she looked at Taylor and, while swearing in her heart that she was fool, bit her lip, opened up the door, and welcomed her in.
'Danny will be home later,' she said, watching the fireplace.
'Ok,' said Taylor. 'What about Kayella.'
'He's finally moved on. Said she doesn't fit with him perfectly. Says she's a positive joy, but not for him. Mandy left him, recently. Gone for good, I think. I stayed. We'll work it out.'
'Ok,' said Taylor, and put her head in her hands, weeping.'
'Oh, don't cry,' said Katy. 'I hate when you cry. You should be happy. Your fabulously succesful.'
'But with nobody to share it. Nobody who loves me - for me.'
'Trillions love you for you,' said Katy, defensively.
'My image. Not the real me. Daniel, though. He liked me instantly. As a person. He was starting to become something when we first met, and he always claimed he liked me the way I was. That I didn't have to pretend with him.'
'He still does,' said Katy nervously.
Taylor looked at her. 'Are you serious?'
'Oh, he's crazy about Taylor Swift. I've been here about 50 years now, and Speak Now is the main album he listens to privately, especially in the afternoons, out in the sun. Often on his ipod, but he plays the CD a lot as well. Don't get me wrong, when we are together it is usually my stuff, or one of his classical CDs, but he adores 'Speak Now' more than any other album. He likes Bon Jovi too, Slippery When Wet is on a lot, but Speak Now never leaves the player practically.'
'Oh,' said Taylor. 'But that doesn't mean anything.'
'Its an eternal obsession. Ruth was speaking to me about it and said it is an album identifiable with Daniel Daly. Really likes it. Says if he had to have just one album, he could be very happy with Speak Now. Doesn't say that about my stuff, but says he is deeply intoxicated with me too. I think its an early 21st century pop girl thing, personally, but don't tell him I said that.'
'I won't,' said Taylor.
'But he's with me, sweetie,' said Katy, looking hostilely at Taylor.
'Yes,' said Taylor. 'And he is a monogamist, isn't he.'
'Uh,' said Katy, and didn't say anything more.
Taylor looked at her. 'Well, he is, isn't he. A monogamist.'
'Um, well, not exactly. He is a Karaite Noahide as you know, and in his religion, well. Well he doesn't particularly care on that issue.'
'Oh,' said Taylor, her eyes lighting up.
'Don't get any ideas sweetheart,' said Katy suddenly. 'The man is spoken for.'
'I'm sure he is fruit loop,' said Taylor, using a popular slang term for Katy which Callodyn himself had popularized.
Katy stared at her and then, in that house, there in Paradision, she had the most awful premonition that, while she would indeed retain her man forever and ever and ever, a certain Taylor Swift now had her foot in, and would not loose it come hell or high water.
She excused herself, went out the back, lit up a cigarette, and said. 'Thanks God. Thanks heaps.'
'You can always look on the brighter side of life,' said the Theophany, coming out of the shadows.
'Oh, really,' said Katy, and the Theophany grinned.
Amanda had been gone a fair while. Forever off on her travelling to the outermost limits of the universe. She would never forgive him. Never. Never, ever, ever. And then she forgave him, kicked herself in the shins for being an idiot, and paid the fair home, for she had no other man in her life, and Daniel Daly would have to do.
She found him out in the back yard, Taylor on a swing, Katy playing with her cat Temperance, and she knew he'd landed the girls he had been after forever. There was one other, his twin Kayella, which he denied vehemently to the public now, but she knew, from secret conversations, that he loved her and she was to be his third woman if he could eternally land her. But he modelled himself on Jacob, father Israel, and she knew he only had 3 to 4 women, as a maximum, for his eternal loves. That many was not weird. Being like Solomon with an endless supply was weird to Daniel. But he WAS a mormon in many ways, and 3 or 4 permanent beauties did not seem to bother Daniel Daly. He had, in the last few years they were together, gotten over insisting on any threesomes or group sex. Claudia had finally had enough of that. But Claudia was gone as well, and Mandy assumed the lass would not come back.
Would she choose him, in the end? Would she? Dreznadoranta was her faithful twin, and loved her, but it was always still a brotherly thing in the end from him, like the twin, apparently, would always be for so many of them. He was not the mate for Amanda. Was Daniel? Would she be in at number 4? Would she?
He smiled at her, kept on digging, and she went and sat next to Taylor on the swing, and smiled at her sister.
'You'll only be number 4, in the end,' commented Taylor, matter of factly. Kayella is his third choice.'
'But he won't go beyond 4, will he? Not even for Madonna.'
said Taylor. 'Madonna is an on again, off again, girlfriend. She is
not for permanency with anyone other than Jesus. That is the way it
'So he would be a permanent, and I'd live here, and he wouldn't hassle me for too much sex.'
'Probably not,' said Taylor.
'Which is probably the way I like it,' said Amanda, looking at Daniel happily digging away.
They had dinner, that night, as a group. Daniel was full of charm, happy that he, while he would not say it, but had the main girls now in his life. There were others he still had huge crushes on, but they were not for his permanent love list. That was 3 names. He would only add the 4th if the 4th loved him enough to stick around forever. And Mandy was now back. Back permanently, he felt. Perhaps forever. Perhaps indeed forever.
'So are you going to join Haven as well?'
The question seemed to come out of the blue. Boaz, really, did not know what to make of it. Of course, he knew a lot about the fellowship now, and that they accepted Jewish members as well, who were also children of Noah, and taught obedience to the Torah from a Karaite perspective for them, which really was not much of an issue for Boaz. But to here it from his wife, Ruth, as matter of factly as that - as if it was a foregone conclusion. He should take issue. So he did, in not the way she might have expected.
'Sure, then, Ruthie. If you are going to connect to Haven Noahide Fellowship forever to justify your Moabite family, then sure. I'm a Noahide as well, so sure. I'll join. And will that be the end of your bloody rebellious ways?'
'Sweetie,' she said, came and sat next to him, put her arm around him, and kissed him on the cheek.
'In the hands of father Noah,' he thought to himself sarcastically. 'Whatever next?'
Ruth was sitting down with Daniel, after a Haven Noahide Fellowship meeting that morning, Boaz having attended, and a happy spirit was in the air. Boaz had remarked the fellowship was distinctly different from the synagogue they normally attended, and that he found a unique peace in Noah that was different from his usual self. 'Something new', he had told Ruth.
'So, Daniel. Katy. Will she be around forever with you?'
'I love her too pieces,' said Daniel, smoking a cigarette.
'And Taylor? You feel the same about her?'
'She's amazing,' he responded, taking another puff.
'Your twin? Kayella? Do you really love her?'
'I'm crazy about her. Don't tell her that, though. Mr Know it all never confesses such thing to a girl as she.'
'Mmm,' said Ruth. 'Well, that makes the three you have always wanted. But now there is Mandy. How do you feel about Mandy?'
Daniel went silent for a while, then put out his cigarette, stood, went to the cupboard, and got his honeycome schnaps.
'I think, Ruth, Mandy will be in my life for a long time. A long, long time. We are affectionate to each other, and she makes me smile. We get along, and we have a lot in common.'
'I sense a but,' said Ruth.
'Yes. You do,' responded Daniel Daly.
There was silence in the kitchen for a while, and while Ruth felt it was best to ask no further, she wanted resolution. It was a permanent neighbour, or not. She needed to know.
'Will she be with you forever?'
'No,' Daniel said, finally, after a few moments lighting another cigarette. 'Look, we get along, and she's wonderful in many ways. But I don't, well, I just don't connect deeply with Mandy. Not on the levels I need to connect on. She's an Aussie girl, and I don't fault her for that. Its just that she is an aussie girl, and my personal temperance is more atune to about the American level in many things. I'm a patriotic Brit at heart, and I love Jessie J amazingly. But those three Yankee lasses are my heart and soul in the end, more than any patriotism can afford. Amanda doesn't have the pull. She never really did. I just liked her a hell of a lot to start with. I'm not really an American, I'm more sort of English Speaking World universalist in the end, psychologically. I draw from the seven nations of Britannia, as I call them, but the champion for me was my Yankee Rose, and my three girls I love the most.'
'Is there a fourth?'
Daniel went silent. There were other names, but nothing which had gone for him yet. Nothing which was compelling to his heart.
'Not yet Ruthie. But Amanda will be here for ages but, in the end, she'll drift off for the final time, into the arms of the right guy for her. She's not for me.'
'Understood,' said Ruth.
'Now, about those tithes,' said Daniel, a huge grin on his face.
'Oh, brother,' said Ruth, and an argument of epic sarcastic proportions began, Daniel far from being the victor. Far from it.
'Mandy, Mandy, Mandy, Mandy, Mandy, Mandy, Mandy. Amanda. Get serious.'
Amanda sat there, with the Ouija board, and said to Ruth. 'Go on. I dare you. Let's consult the dark lord. Ask him how he is enjoying his vanquishing to Hades.'
Boaz, sitting at the table next to Daniel, reading a newspaper, commented, 'I never understood witchcraft. Of course, our religion has always forbidden it, but I could never see the point anyway. Why get involved with demons. Dark lords. They will hardly act in your best interests.'
Daniel spoke, playing with his Nintendo DS3D, 'Amanda likes the dark side.'
'Jesus saves,' said Katy, painting her fingernails.'
'And Satan invests,' said Amanda sarcastically,' which brought some wry smiles from those seated at the table.
'What does he invest in?' asked Taylor, a little smile on her face.
'Oh, lots of things,' said Amanda.'
'Like what?' asked Taylor again.
'Sensible witches,' said Amanda focusing on the Ouija board.
'He probably plays the stockmarket. You know, Paramount tower 666, the ultimate business empire. Typical. I saw the Omen III. Satan's a businessman,' commented Katy.
'That he is,' said Daniel. 'A very hostile competitor. Uses every legal avenue, and a lot of questionable ones, to get ahead as much as possible. Strangely, though, he keeps his employees happy. He just is very hostile as a competitor. As long as he rules, I think. Stay ahead of the pack.'
'Perhaps he should think about getting along. Better business ethics,' suggested Taylor.
'I'll mention that too him when he gets back,' said Amanda.
'So he's not gone forever?' asked Katy, looking at Daniel.
Daniel didn't really know what to say but, eventually,' look, God forgives everyone eventually. Satan will be on probation when he finally gets back, but yeh. He'll be back. Devil's never go away in the end. It's what we are lumbered with in life.'
'So let's ask him about how he is enjoying hades,' suggested Amanda.
'Go on Ruth,' said Daniel. 'You can handle the devil now.'
'Ruthie. Don't you dare,' said Boaz, but protest as he might, he was unwilling to manhandle her in the present company as she sat down on the floor, opposite Amanda, and put their hands on the indicator.
'Satan. Lord of misrule. Are you there?'
After a few seconds their hands started moving and, letter by letter, they spelled out: G E T F U C K E D M A N D Y
As Daniel read out the last letter the laughter was intense in the room, and Ruth went home that morning, Boaz mocking her softly, saying 'I told you not to mess with the Devil.'
'Ruth. The dark lords of evil are not to be trifled with.'
'No,' responded Ruth to God's theophany.
'So, while you are indeed a Noahide now, the liberties you have been enjoying have a limit. I don't expect you to ever really permanently return to Judaism.'
'I hadn't planned on doing that,' she said.
'Not yet,' said God. 'But I do have some idea what the future holds.'
'Oh, yeah,' responded Ruth. 'I forgot.'
'Yes. So remember, mess with the Devil and he'll expect his dues.'
'His dues?' queried Ruth.
'His dues,' nodded the Theophany, returning to his cigarette and his cricket magazine.
Ruth returned to her knitting, looked at the little devil she had just knitted onto a jumper, full of angels and devils, and said to herself, 'The devil's dues. Mmmmm.'
The alcohol truck drove by, came to a stop, and delivered the carton of King David wine to the address it had. Right in front of Ruth's place. It was the wrong address, but he pushed the buzzer, waited, and with no one coming, assumed it would be ok, and left.
Later that afternoon, Ruth, thinking she might have heard a knock earlier that day, just went to the front door to check, and found the alcohol. She and Boaz didn't normally drink, and had never really been in a drunk state while living in Paradision, but she assumed it was some sort of gift, and took the crate inside.
'What's that?' asked Boaz.
'A gift,' suggested Ruth. 'I suppose.'
'Mmm. King David. The best stuff. Pour us some, will you.'
'Oh. Ok,' she said.
Steadily that afternoon, on somebody else's wine, they got sloshed. The wine was sweet and delicioius, she smoked some ciggies, which were the fashion in Paradision just at the moment, and right around 10, when they were quite inebriated, Boaz emerged from the basement with a suspicious looking parcel which, she thinking was just more tobacco, was something a little more.
'It's weed,' he said, hiccupping.
'Oh,' we couldn't,' she said.
But they did.
The following morning, feeling the worse for wear, the Devil indeed claimed his dues.
She was returning from the cafe, with some croissants and coffee to make a better morning, not really concentrating on the road, feeling the effects of the heavy night, and had failed to notice the GPS battery on the dashboard was flashing. The car battery had just died and the emergency battery had a leak, unbeknownst to Ruth, so the emergency failsafe to prevent accidents was not working. And that is when, her eyes off the road momentarily, she hit the pedestrian, who flew over the hood of the car, landed behind it, and the screams which were for a second diminished to a whimper.
'Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,' swore Ruth, a million times over. She slammed on the breaks, a mortified look on her face. She looked around, nobody yet emerging from the street houses, and carefully got out, went to the back of the car, and looked. It was a female, young, by the looks of it, and she was still alive, blood from her T-shirt seeping through, a nasty gash on her forehead as well.
'Oh fuck,' said Ruth, kneeling down. 'Your going to be ok, sweetie. Your going to be ok.'
She rang 000, gave the location, which was just short of her place, and held the girls hand nervously, waiting for the ambulance.
Tears were pouring down her face when the girl came to for a moment, put her hand out and touched Ruth's and said, blood starting to froth in her mouth, 'I forgive you,' and then it was over.
The ambulance arrived, and by then there were 7 or 8 onlookers, but it was too late. They confirmed the girl had died, and Ruth sat there, by the road, tears streaming from her face, mortified beyond death itself, asking again and again. 'Why me?'
And then a thought came to her, God's own words. 'The Devil's dues.'
And she almost cursed God, almost, but sobbed and sobbed as the police arrived, took their notes, and said that she could give a full report in the morning.
Boaz arrived, caressed her and spoke softly too her, and as they returned the short trip home, Ruth looking out the window, a daze on her face, it was a surreal time, a time she never, ever, ever forgot, a time when the dark lord, once and for all, had been dealt with in the life of Ruth the Moabite.
The Court sat. The actual resurrection of the girl was not really the issue, Ruth's lawyers being ignored. That would be taken care of by standard policy at the next intake, due at the end othe millennial cycle when other accidental death victims were resurrected by the chief Rabbinic Doctor in charge of those duties.
The girl's parents didn't really blame Ruth that much in the end, but the police action against her was severe. She should have known better. 'Even Ruth must face judgement,' said the prosecuting attorney. 'Nobody is above the law.'
And so she did, and got 2 years, with a probationary period with good behaviour available after 6 months. But she would spend at least those 6 months behind bars. There was no way around that reality.
Her first night there, alone in the 10 prisoner jail outside of the nearby main city of Paradision, the jail rarely seeing inmates, Boaz came to visit her.
'Have you been good,' he said, a smile on his face.
She said nothing.
'It's not that long. Don't they have activities or something.
She said nothing.
'Ok. You killed someone. Its not the end of the world. Like you said, the girl forgave you. It was an accident.'
'But I'm in jail,' she said.
'Yes. You are.'
She sat there, stoney silent, and Boaz left after a while, and she returned to her cell and, looking at the Tanakh on the bookcase, she almost cursed God again, but turned to Exodus 20, read 'Thou shalt not kill,' and, quietly, got down on her knees, and confessed her crime to God.
'The accident wasn't the issue,' said the Theophany, 6 months later, smoking his cigarette, reading the same cricket magazine by the looks of it.
'You were behind it?' she queried accusingly.
He looked at her, and the look, deep, deep into her soul, reminding her just who he was and the rules of life forced silence out of her. She couldn't say anything, after all. She WAS guilty.
'So don't mess with the devil. Coz he don't play fair,' said God.
And Ruth took that lesson to heart.
In truth, Ruth didn't really have any ways to reform her life, but after sitting through 6 months of rehabilitation videos, the absolute legalism to the nth degree was starting to bother even Boaz, who was well known for being fussy and legalistic.
It came to the point when, failing to put a tea towel away in the cupboard, Ruth rebuked him for his slovenliness and said he was a no good sinner.
'Calm down Ruthie. What has gotten into you?'
And that is when Ruth had her breakdown.
She was in the psych ward, having had a psychotic attack, out wandering the bush near her home, Daniel and Boaz and the rest out all night looking for her, finding her well after midnight, sitting near a bush, shivering, crying.
Boaz had helped her walk home, very carefully nurturing her with comforting words, because she never stoppeed saying she was unforgiveable. She had killed someone, and it had gone to her head. She was damned forever because she did not care for people with all her heart.
The theophany visited once, later that month, just before her hospitalization, and commented to Boaz that she would be fine - eventually. Boaz took little comfort.
The psyc ward in the main city near Paradision had 2 other guests, 1 of them a long term schizophrenic, recently arrived from earth of all places, an insane noahide from Haven Noahide Fellowship ironically, who believed he was the next messiah of the messianic people. His name was Curtis Chapman, and while he was cute, and Ruth, still high, pushed away his advances, but succumbed one night, when the nurses were not looking, and smoking a cigarette, riding her new lover to a glorious joint climax, exclaimed she was whore babylon and that she may as well go out with a bang. They certainly did that night.
It was a lonely 12 months for Boaz, more than anything else, and after the doctor suggsted he stay away because she was in a turmoil after his visits, full of guilt, he only showed up at the end of the period when the hospital rang and said Ruth was ready for trial visits.
They were trying times, once more, but the worst of the psychosis was gone. The puritanical ways, though, were still just as extreme, and Boaz bit his lip often when she ranted at him for the most minor of problems. He tried to grin and bear it.
It came to a head. 'You need somewhere special. I know a place. The house of Broken hearts. Melanie C. Callodyn knows her very well. She can help.'
Ruth didn't object.
'Yes, lots,' said Melanie, to Daniel the Seraphim's question.
Returning from the hall cupboard, she had her spare box of cereal, for they were out, and Daniel had dropped around for breakfast.
'Well, its someone we know. Quite a popular lady. She has had a problem. Callodyn called me. Said his neigbours were in a bit of a stick.'
'But aren't his neighbours.....' she trailed of. Daniel nodded.
'Mmm,' said Melanie C. 'Ruth. A psychotic. Now how was she going to deal with this?'
Melanie and Daniel 5
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
Copyright 6176 SC
Daniel was feeling a bit more of a man. Hex defeated, Melanie proud of him, and he had gained some confidence. Now for some cricketing glory in the Hull championships.
'Why?' asked Melanie.
'An ancient ambition. I never really knew England as a youngster, not physically in person, but I saw plenty of English shows on TV, and was born there. It just remained my heart for a long time, and in terms of sports, that is where my passion is. Although I am a citizen, in my heart, of the 7 Sovereign Nations as I call them, my heart belongs to the Empire.'
'The Seven Sovereign Nations,' said Melanie, reminded of the list Daniel had once conceived. 'Let me see,' she said. 'United Kingdom, Ireland, Australia, Guyana, New Zealand, Canada and the United States of America. The Anglosphere, essentially. Right?'
'Yes. Were I am realistically a citizen,' responded Daniel, looking at the cricket magazine he had just picked up. 'And, in fact, in the sporting competitions in cricket throughout the realm I pray for 7SN nations quite a heck of a lot. God has told me, on a number of occasions, that my prayers are a form of spiritual energy and works for truth. If I really want something, I pray to him, and in the spiritual dynamics he has set up in the universe, the more true and holy and sincere and zealous my prayers - the more genuine my faith - the better the ultimate results I get.'
Melanie nodded. An interesting perspective on prayer, but she had heard it many times before from her man.
'Well, you enjoy the Hull championships, Danny. I will do you the honour of praying for you.'
'Thanks babe,' said Daniel, and kissed Melanie on the cheek.
Daniel qualified for the junior's side in the Hull Championships. It had been aeons since his glory of playing for England in the very early days of the Realm, when there was far less competition. Now, the level of excellence at the game, deemed it practically impossible for the average shmo to do anything at all in achieving glory unless supernaturally talented. Daniel still believed he had that talent.
Melanie arrived at training one day, with Mel B. They looked at Daniel as he went about his business, determined to be a proper Hull Championship player.
'He'll never make it,' said Mel B.
'No. He's talentless,' responded Melanie.
'He'll make a fool of himself trying,' said Mel B.
'Yes. A complete joke,' responded Melanie.
'They'll probably call him the worse player ever,' said Mel B.
'Definitely,' finished Melanie.
* * * * *
Ironically, not only did Daniel qualify for Hull, but did exceedingly well, the English side calling him up. The England A side.'
At training for England A the girls were talking.
'He'll never make it,' said Mel B.
'No. He's talentless,' responded Melanie.
'He'll make a fool of himself trying,' said Mel B.
'Yes. A complete joke,' responded Melanie.
'They'll probably call him the worse player ever,' said Mel B.
'Definitely,' finished Melanie.
Daniel came up from the training and said to the girls. 'So how do you think I went?'
'Oh, brilliant,' said Mel B. 'Sure to play for England.'
'You were outstanding,' responded Melanie. 'A champion.'
Daniel grinned once more.
So Daniel prospered in the England A side, and got the official call up. Time for the big side - time to face the Aussies.
At training for the English Test Side.
'He'll never make it,' said Mel B.
'No. He's talentless,' responded Melanie.
'He'll make a fool of himself trying,' said Mel B.
'Yes. A complete joke,' responded Melanie.
'They'll probably call him the worse player ever,' said Mel B.
'Definitely,' finished Melanie.
Daniel came up and smiled at the girl's
'How do you think I went?' he asked them.
'Oh, brilliant,' said Miss Brown.
'Outstanding,' said Melanie.
In his first dig, opening, he got a duck.
'Its official. Completely talentless,' said Mel B.
Melanie justs shakes her head as Daniel comes off glum.
In the second innings, they needed 304 to make the Aussies bat again, Daniel and the other opener putting on a 517 opening stand, before the other guy got out for 231. Daniel went on to make 517, a record, and England won the match.
'You think your brill, don't you Danny,' said Mel B, on the bed, down near his crotch.
'He does,' said Melanie C, on the other side.
'Umm,' said Daniel,' but Mel B grabbed his cock, started stroking it, then the two girls started tonguing his dick, there mouths paying him lavish attention, going up and down, until Daniel couldn't take it much more.
'I'll have you,' said Melanie B, got on top of him, and fucked him hard, while Melanie C sat on his face, and as he licked her hot vagina, his cock exploded hot creamy cum in Melanie B's Cunt, and he groaned and groaned and groaned.
Little Danielle was born 9 months later, and Melanie B was seen with him from then on.
- Apostle Paul - Mel B's twin - came in to the ward, looked at Mel B
with the child and said 'I suppose even Satan is capable of
'Very funny,' said Mel B. 'Daniel is a lovely guy.'
'Bah, humbug,' said Paul, but proceded to pick up Danielle and traipse half way around the hospital with her before returning the crying baby back to the arms of its anxious mother.
Melanie C sat on her bus seat, looking out the window as the fields passed by, travelling south to Paradision. She had been on a flight from the connecting spaceport, and would arrive in Paradision in about half an hour. It was a standard 1 hour trip from the city north of Paradision to Paradision. As a city, Paradision wasn't even one. It was a town of about 20,000 people, but that fluctuated throughout the aeons. Once it had over 100,000 people when their was a big push to be a commercial centre, but that fizzled after a while, a heart of the populace praying savagely against that idea.
The fields were farms, and other sights common with a planet like Televere, or Televon as it was also called, and Melanie C had visited the place numerous times before visiting her Cherubim brother Callodyn. But this time she wasn't visiting Daniel. She was visiting Ruth. The biblical Ruth. And Ruth had problems. Anti-social psychotic problems. Melanie was a long term member of the House of Broken Hearts, a professional worker and healer in many social ways, and she had been called in for one of her more impressive cases, if not challenging. Really, she did not know yet how challenging it would be, haven't had much information yet, but she would soon find out. The fields passed by and shortly she noticed a sign advertising McDonalds at 15 km, and she knew she would soon be at her destination. She managed to stretch her legs a little in the confined space, put her book away, finished off her water, and looked forward, with a little tinge of anxiousness, too her next few months of what could be quite an experience to remember afterwards.
* * * * *
'Alleluia, Melanie. Alle bloody luia.'
'Watch your mouth, Ruth,' said Melanie, and tapped her on the hand.
'I respect God, fine,' said Ruth, taking a puff on her cigar, a recent attraction, and doing her best to ignore Melanie's attempted counsel. 'Anyway, who asked you to lecture me?' queried the annoyed Moabite.
'That doesn't matter,' said Melanie. 'What matters is getting you well.'
'I AM well,' insisted Ruth.
'Hardly,' responded the Spice Girl, yet said nothing more, but sipped on her coffee and looked patiently at her patient.
Ruth tried to ignore her. She sat there, puffed away, but Melanie's persistent stare finally brought a rise.
'Go to hell, spice girl.'
'Your lovely,' retorted Melanie.
'Why thank you,' came the sarcastic response.
'People are worried about you,' said Mel.
'They should mind their business too,' said Ruth, and sulked off to the lounge room, put on a rock and roll CD, and did her best to ignore Melanie for the rest of the day.
But Melanie Chisholm was not naive, and softly the following morning she invited Ruth down to Paradision Creek to try some of her standard approaches.
They sat there, all morning, feeding ducks, Ruth listening to an iPod, and Melanie didn't say anything. Not a word. She just sat there - waiting. She knew Ruth would open up, in time. She knew it well.
It persisted for 4 weeks, most morning going down to the creek, feeding the ducks, and silence from the Spice Girl. She was just there. And then, finally, one morning it got to much for Ruth and she opened up.
'Why do people think I have a problem? I'm the same as I always have been.'
Melanie turned, looked at her but, in Melanies standard tactic at this point, she didn't say anything. She just tilted her head at Ruth's question, and remained silent.
But the question came again a few days later and Melanie responded. 'Because you are not behaving like they are used to. They are used to a more grounded Ruth. Far less erratic.'
'I do what I want,' said Ruth.
'I know,' said Melanie. 'We all do.'
'Then what is the fuc.. the freaking problem.'
'I think you know the problem,' said Mel.
Ruth stared at her, and then turned to look at the ducks. She knew Melanie had a point, even if she didn't want to admit it.
Four more weeks passed, and silence, and finally.
'Its the girl's face,' said Ruth. 'I can't get it out of my mind.'
'Tell me about it,' said Mel.
Ruth breathed heavily, threw one last piece of bread at a duck clucking at their feet, and opened up.
'It still gives me nightmares. That face. Oh, the girl will be fine in time, and she doesn't blame me. But I'm a bad girl, aren't I now Melanie. Like you.'
'I'm hardly a bad girl,' responded Melanie.
'That's rich. Coming from a Spice Girl.'
Melanie didn' respond.
Ruth just sat there, after that, in silence, sulking. She wouldn't say anything more today.
Kelly Clarkson was a popstar. America's first idol, the world at her feet, money unlimited, a name of great and grand reputation. She was hospitable, caring, sensational in so many ways, and a first class singer. But her twin was Callodyn, and every so often she wisecracked to God that he was a 'genius' for giving Daniel Daly to her as a soulmate. The Most High was yet to respond to her jibes.
But Kayella, a normally humble girl, was sick to death of the boastings of her twin about his endlessly successful 'Chronicles of the Children of Destiny' saga, the debut of which, the illustrious 'Morning Stars' usually sat atop the worlds bestseller list right at number one. It was the traditional choice of the critics, and had the best sales all time of any book at all, including the bible, which was a tough competitor from Israel. She was going to put the schmuck in his place.
She arrived at the Devil's abode, knocked, and waited. Shortly he answered, and she smiled at him, walked past, and came into the front living room.
He followed her in, smiled, and poured them both scotch's. Shortly she got out her CD 'Breakaway' from her handbag and tossed it to him.
'Thanks,' he said. 'But I've got a trillion of them.'
'Its number one. Realm of Eternity charts. Number bloody one, ok. Right now.'
He looked at the CD and grinned. 'This old schmozzle. What are they thinking.'
'Ha!' she said. 'I have worked my ass off touring and promoting it. Take that Morning Stars freak.'
Daniel stood, went to the bookcase, and picked off one of the rare copies of his first printings. 'This is the baby. Yep, last time I checked, she was still number one in the realm. The outlying discs continue to buy the baby, and some of the inner discs are still getting sales. Even the bookstore at Zaphora occasionally sells some of them to tourists. I mean, everyone has it by now in the inner world, but its still getting sales baby.'
'And how rich are you, Devil?' she queried, grabbing her CD and looking at it.
'Oh, I don't know,' he responded. 'Probably richer than you, but I don't know your live concert fees.'
'Humph,' she said. 'Well I'll get you, you know. Dwarf your sales one day.'
'That will take some doing,' he said smartly. 'I'm not sure if you have it in you. Pop star.'
'You'll see. Kayella is not done in by a smarty pants like Daniel Daly. I mean, you don't even have the intelligence to write a novel as sophisticated as Morning Stars.'
'I'll take that as a compliment then,' he responded. 'I did.'
'Whatever. Anyway, do you have any petrol left in the tank? I doubt it after all this time. I still have several hundred unreleased projects. I haven't used all my available copyrights yet.'
He looked at her, mildly concerned. 'You'll need it,' he said, a little pride in his voice. 'For Morning Stars shall rule the known universe in time.'
'Bite me,' she said.
'Want to go out for dinner?' he asked her, smiling warmly, with that smile he sometimes used when he was being nice.
'With a freak like you?'
'I'll pay,' he responded.
'Humph. Well, ok. Only because the gentleman has finally shown up.'
'I'll get my coat,' sweetheart. 'And I'll show you that gentleman.'
Later that night, when Kayella was sleeping soundly in the guest room, Daniel sat down at his PC, opened up a long dorman file on his computer, a and looked at it. The title page read 'Morning Stars 141', but the rest was an empty page.
That night he started planning 'Morning Stars 141 - 1,400,000: The rest of the Agenda'. 'This will sort her out,' he thought smugly to himself.
The theophany showed up that night and looked at him strictly. 'Originally, child of mine, I wouldn't let either you or Daniel work on this again. So much of what you wanted to write really needed to be lived, first. But it has now, ok. It has. You don't really know by who in many cases, but that doesn't matter. I will allow you up to the end of Morning Stars 1,400,000 for now, and 11 volumes worth of titles for each arc. You now have enough experience and information to write the thing properly. Just be careful with numbers like 147 and 161 and 368 especially, ok. And 369 could be a handful as well.' Callodyn nodded. He knew, intimately well, just who those titles belonged to.
'And remember,' continued the Theophany. 'You are an exception to normal principles on Copyright. The centrality of your writings and personal value and enjoyment to my Holy Spirit warrants them to go to such a length, which would not normally be available to you.'
'I know. You said that a long time ago.'
'So you are graced. I don't really worry about the wealth. You have never been irresponsible with it and support enough charities I have my hand upon. So don't let it go to your head ok.'
'Would I do that Father,' smiled Daniel.
God just looked at him with that serious look he had.
'So get to it. And remember my first printings. I collect these ones very seriously.'
'Will do Kemosabe,' but the Father of Glory ignored the comment, yet tempted to shake his head at his cheeky child.
'No, I'm not really damned. I like to pretend I am, but I don't believe that. Not even Satan goes to hell forever. God finally forgives.'
'Then what is the problem?' asked Melanie.
'The Devil's dues,' said Ruth flatly.
'Explain,' said Mel.
'Whatever else, the Devil will get his dues. Even if it is just Karma or Fate or some other God judging me. It has scared me so much that everything is an issue now. I am so bloody legalistic according to Boaz, and then a hypocrite at the time with what I say and how I behave. I am living in heaven and hell at the same time. Probably do deserve purgatory.' She grabbed Melanie's arm. 'We are all walking time bombs, you know. Instruments of death. Instruments of chaos. In the freedom God gives us, so much evil we can do.'
'But we don't,' responded Melanie. 'Because we have consciences.'
'It doesn't change what we are capable of,' responded Ruth. 'Of the evil we are capable of. Even with our consciences.'
'Our prayers. Our lifetime of prayers protect us. They are like armour, and the more of them we have the thicker the armour.'
'Then I probably have crappy leather,' commented Ruth sarcastically.
'I'm sure you have glorious plate mail,' smiled Melanie, but Ruth ignored the statement.
Later Melanie realized the Ruth was paranoid. That she was not quite seeing things right, which was usually the root cause of schizophrenia in many ways - a maladjusted world view. She would need patience and sense in communicating wisdom to her. And that wisdom would have to affor Ruth a more correct world view point. A world view point in which goodness still triumphed over evil, no matter what doubts Ruth the Moabite currently had. No matter what doubts.
* * * * *
Callodyn had a photo of Kayella on his desk, and was insulting her, thinking through a plot for Morning stars 141.
'Your stupid aren't you,' he said to the photo.
'Yep. Too dumb to reply.'
She suddenly appeared at the door of the room, then, said 'Watcha doin?'
'Kicking your ass,' he says.
'Let me see,' and when she saw the title with no other dialogue she grinned. 'Ha. You haven't got a thing.'
He glared at her, and she took victory, proceeding to traipse around the room singing 'Nothing. He's got nothing. Nothing at all. Alleluia.'
'I'll get you,' he said, glaring daggers at her and, just then, in a moment of inspiration, he suddenly had a core idea and it expanded in his head very rapidly.
She continued her merry dance, and he started typing away. After a while, though, she noticed the typing, and came over like a hawk to see what he had written. He tried to shoo her off, but he had no success, and she read what he had written.
'You call that a plot? Ha! I've already won.'
'You'll see,' he said happy. He had a cracker plot.
'Danny's an idiot,' she began singing, dancing around the room, as happy as could be. But he just kept on typing and, as the afternoon passed on, her singing around the house was a constant spur to motivate his frenetic typing. He would indeed get even with his most pride filled sister. He would indeed.
The theophany was speaking with Melanie. 'There was a good rabbit. And there was a bad rabbit. The good rabbit ate his food, but never ate too much. The bad rabbit was greedy, and ate too much every single day. The good rabbit lived a long time and had many, many children. A lot, even for a rabbit. The bad rabbit got fat, died young, and had very few children. There is a simplet yet timeless moral, daughter of mine. Good things happen to good people and bad things happen to bad people, and that if you concentrate on living a holy and moral life then you never really have to worry.'
Melanie took the lesson to heart.
* * * * *
Callodyn had finished Morning Stars 141, and was showing it to Daniel the Seraphim, the co-writer in the lengthy series. Daniel laughed a lot that afternoon, reading it happily, and Kayella came in.
She looked at Daniel for a while, and looked at Callodyn grinning at her. 'You think you have got a hit, do you?' she asked him.
'Better believe it sweetheart,' said Callodyn cockily.
'Let me read it then.'
'You'll regret it.'
'Hand it over Dan,' said Kayella strictly to her older Seraphim brother Daniel, who caved and gave her the manuscript.
For the rest of the afternoon she was consumed in reading it. And, as some of the witty things came to be, and some of the real heart of the book, which was very noticeable, spoke volumes about his increased skill, she smiled to herself. Her twin, yet again, had outdone himself. Yet again he had shown himself a man.
That night she sneaked into his bedroom, as the other girls were away, and undressed, saying 'Your my hero.'
Daniel looked at his twin's beauty, and as they made passionate love with each other he said 'But I'll still sell more copies than you.'
'Bastard,' she said, slapping his face, but then she kissed him again, and they proceded to do the wild thing.
Three weeks later she knew she was yet again pregnant, but wouldn't tell him until it was obvious. She wouldn't reward his pride any more than it already had been rewarded. The bastard.
* * * * *
Talking with Ruth, Melanie used her own little example about a good squirrel and a bad squirrel in the form of a fable to explain to Ruth that Ruth had gone astray, somewhat, from seeking God's will, and needed to concentrate on the faith properly once more. 'Perhaps a little Noahide pride came in,' said Melanie, from the conversations she'd been having with Boaz. Ruth dismissed that idea, but saw the point.
'In the end, Ruth. Only you can sort yourself out. If you like your life the way it is, sure, don't change. Be yourself. Don't care about anyone's opinion. Live as you please. Live in all the freedom you want.'
Ruth was silent, looking at the ducks, but eventually responded.
'And if I do care?'
'Then things are going to have to change. In time, they are going to have to change. So you need to do some serious soulsearching and you need to ask yourself a question.' She said nothing more.
Eventually Ruth dared the stupidity of it, but asked 'What bloody question?'
Melanie turned to her. 'The question is this. What lies in the heart of Ruth, wife of Boaz? What type of person is she like really? Deep, deep, down. What is she really like?'
'Wouldn't we all like to know,' said Ruth, returning her gaze to the creek. But she knew Melanie had asked exactly the right kind of question. What exactly was really in the heart of Ruth wife of Boaz? What, exactly, made her tick. What, what, what?
* * * * *
Morning Stars 141 had topped the charts, and little 'Ruth Clarkson-Daly' had been born. Kayella, in the end, was very proud of her man, and Callodyn had triumphed, for a while, over Daniel. But she wouldn't give him a break that easily.
'I'll still have the last laugh,' said Kayella, as Daniel poured over the fanmail for his latest epic.
'I doubt it,' responded the Cherubim.
'Pride comes before the fall,' said Kayella.
'I hear that a lot,' said Daniel sarcastically.
'You probably need to,' she said smartly.
'Touche. Now read this one out to me. I am sure it flatters me awesomely.'
She took the letter, opened it up, and giggled.
'What's so funny?' he asked.
She smiled at him. 'I told you I would have the last laugh.'
'What gives?' he said concerned.
She began reading the letter. 'Dear Daniel. Your book really, really, really, really, really, really, sucks.'
She grinned at him madly, and he grabbed the letter and, as he read insult after insult at his latest masterpiece, the laughter in the abode of Callodyn the Cherubim, 228th of the male Cherubim of the Realm of Eternity, resident of Paradision on the planet of Televere, didn't stop for quite some time. For quite some time indeed.
Ruth Clarkson-Daly and Danielle Brown-Daly were lovely girls, both a delight to their parents, yet time moves on and Daniel faced up to his girls moving on with life as they got older and blossomed into loveable, attractive women. The two of them found a flat together in the centre of Paradision and when Daniel came round he often found boys sneaking out the back entrance.
'Were you any different as a kid?' Ruth CD had asked him. Daniel had said nothing.
Danielle was 27 and Ruth was 18 and all sorts of Noahide and Jewish boys were chasing them, probably promising them fabulous lives together as they moved on and found their place in the universe. Of course, it was like that now, on Televere. It had been for a long while now. New births had only so long with their parents on Televon before they had to inevitably move offworld, due to the obvious necessity to keep population statistics under control, which meant Daniel had only so long with his two new daughters before they would be gone, off to one of the other planetary bodies most likely, or possibly even one of the ever expanding outer discs of the realms of eternity or infinity. Yet, for now he enjoyed their company, although starting to be a little concerned about his next door neighbour Ruth, and her ongoing shenanigans, roping in his two daughters to her now somewhat hectic partying lifestyle.
Ruth and the girls, indeed, were out partying one night. The drinks were flowing, certain illicit substances were being utilized, and the spirit was high in each of them. The girls were the scene in the Paradision nightclub they were in and soon they had three of the randier fellas, one Jewish looking guy, one westerner and one negro, all trying to get into their pants. And the girls didn't seem to mind.
Back at the flat, the six of them half naked, Ruth found her black man so alluring she went down on him, and then, Ruth CD pashing her fella naked, looked at Ruth CD and said, 'Your Hot Bitch,' and proceeded to push her head down towards Ruth CD's vagina and, when Ruth CD didn't object, ate her out. She was totally wasted.
In the morning she did not remember anything, and while Ruth CD seemed to look guiltily at her, she had forgotten the whole night.
Three weeks later, though, she suddenly remembered that she just might not have been that faithful to Boaz after all, no matter how many times she had tried to persuade herself nothing had happened. After all - she was now pregnant.
'Good news, Boaz. We're going to have a baby?'
Daniel smiled at the news, but Boaz looked cautious. 'We haven't slept together in a little while, Ruth. And we are going to have a baby?'
'Ooh, fiddlesticks,' she said. 'Don't be such a party pooper. Our little boy or girl will add some excitement.'
Later that year, when Boaz and the gang were brought into the nursing mother and child, Taylor looked down at the child. The half black child.
'Ooh, looks just like his daddy,' said Taylor.
Daniel grinned. Boaz wanted to swear. Ruth did her best to keep cool.
Ruth and Boaz were out shopping with little Bronwyn. No questions had been asked, yet, amongst their friends. Really, what could you say. There were, though, a number of softer smiles, and even Rabbi Pearlman had something of an amused look on his face when greeted with the new addition to their household.
Today they were doing their general shopping when a black man walked past in front of them, turned and siad 'Hi Ruth,' and walked on.
'Excuse me,' said Ruth to Boaz and, taking the baby, walked up and spoke animatedly with the black man for a few minutes. As Boaz looked on the man, albeit reluctantly, took possession of the walker with the child, and, having exchanged notes, Ruth returned as if nothing had happened - the baby left with the black man.
'He'll bring the baby around every Hannukah. He has my address.'
Boaz looked straight at the man who was gazing at his new child, and turned at looked at Boaz with a 'Why Me?' look on his face.
That was life with Ruth the Moabite, thought Boaz. Full of all sorts of surprises.
Ruth was once more in the psych ward. She was unwell. Off her head, according to Boaz, high as a kite. No great paranoid delusions or voices or anything like that, but totally high as a kite and rambling on about her little black baby all the time.
'She's a mess,' he said to Melanie C. 'I think she is off in a world of her own. And I think the bitch likes it.'
Melanie smiled. 'I'll see what I can do.'
Melanie sat with Ruth that whole morning, gently talking to her about her child and why she had given it to its father, and calming her down over some of the more excessive things she was saying.
'Are you still doing drugs?' Melanie asked her.
'I don't do drugs,' defied Ruth.
'But you smoke 40, 50 cigarettes a day. You don't think that is pushing it too much. You do know God has only so much patience on the ciggies, don't you. Sure, medicine is very advanced, but he still does allow cancer and other things if we push them to the extreme. And 50 a day is a fair whack.'
'Fuck off,' said Ruth. 'Stop judging me.'
'Ruthie, ruthie, ruthie.'
But Ruth sat there, lit up another cigarette, and started talking to nobody in particular about her little black baby.
When Melanie came back to the concerned Boaz she just shrugged and said, 'You know. She'll get better. She's doing this for kicks, you know. Just to get high and be happy. Its getting her off for now.'
'I know,' said Boaz. 'She's a bitch.'
Melanie almost agreed.
Ruth had been released again and Boaz was complaining that if she continued to do drugs and get high all the time they would have nothing but problems.
'Bite me,' said Ruth.
Boaz shook his head in despair.
It came to a head that Hannukah with the father of her new child present. Boaz came into the living room, with a small suitcase full of his personals, holding his wallet.
'I'm going now, Ruthie. I don't know when I will be back. Enjoy your new life.'
Boaz left and the man turned to Ruth. 'He's going?' he exclaimed.
'Let him,' she said. 'He's too much of a stichler for me.'
'Jesus,' says the black man, looking after Boaz.
But Ruth bit into an apple, played with her baby, and didn't give a damn.
Jack Drake moved into Ruth and Boaz's place within 3 weeks. He worked on the north side of Paradision, in a small community shop which sold newspapers, milk and bread, and not much else. But he got by and didn't have great expenses.
'I sell a lot of milk,' he said sarcastically to Ruth. 'Its were they get a lot of it, up Paradision North.'
'I see,' said Ruth. 'No other grand ambitions?'
'I've done it for years, Ruthy. 400 years ago, when I migrated to Paradision, having saved the enormous permanent visa cost for millions of years, I looked at the situation and said to myself, start slowly. If it works, don't worry about it. And I bought a place, and my belongings are all within it, most of them expensive Eternya which I forked out for, and I don't need much else. I have a few children were I came from, but our little bundle of joy is my world, now, Ruthy.'
'Bronwyn means that much to you?' asked Ruth sincerely.
So, they played house for a while, Ruth, technically, living in sin, enjoying her lovers company, and Boaz had not returned. 3 years passed and still the same. Boaz had not returned.
Callodyn was chatting with her one morning, as little Bronwyn scampered around the kitchen, nearly ready for school years, and Callodyn asked her soberly.
'When do you think he will return?'
Ruth didn't answer. But she looked earnestly at Daniel. 'I'm not sure if I don't care. I'm not sure if I do. The bugger left me, ok. Why should I even take him back?'
'I don't know. Something silly like 'Love.'
'Very funny,' she said. But she got the not too subtle point.
3 more years passed. 3 more years, and Jack had disappeared, happy to have Bronwyn half of the time, and Ruth had gotten into the habit of standing in the front room, listening to the Kate Miller-Heidke song 'Last Day on Earth', and waiting there, at the front window, waiting on Boaz. Waiting forever on Boaz.
She didn't know where he had gone, and he never sent any word. Never. Not once. And she missed him, now. More than anyone or anything else she had ever missed in her entire life, she missed Boaz. The heart of her, ripped out, and all because of her foolishness. All because of her stubborn, stubborn, stupid pride.
Silly old Ruth. Silly old Ruth.
Daniel tried comforting her from time to time, but he wasn't much use. And Melanie C's occasional visit didn't really cheer her up that much either.
No, she was disconsolate. Standing there, at the window. Standing there, waiting. Waiting for Boaz.
Taylor was talking with Ruth. 'Boaz will come back in time. He probably knwos about the situation.'
'He doesn't care,' said Ruth.
'Honestly, Ruthie. Can you blame him. After all the crap you threw at him, what do you expect. He is only human.'
'Your defending him. I thought you were on my side.'
'I'm not on anybody's side.'
'Your on his side,' said Ruth, and lit up another cigarette.
'Look. Ruth,' said Daniel. 'Boaz is a sensible guy. However long he takes, the message should be abundantly clear by now.'
'And what's the fucking message?' asked a suddenly angered Moabite.
'I think you should know,' replied Daniel softly.
She glared at him, puffed on her cigarette, and turned her head and sulked. But, yes. She did know. She knew all to well by now.
Boaz did not return. Ruth remained depressed, sulking, and getting used to the single life. Her child, Bronnie, had grown up, moved to the city her father lived in, started a career there with certain rights from her father, and Ruth was now well and truly on her own once more, living a solitary life, waiting on her man to return. And she was now starting to face her repentance. To face it more honestly, more decently. More truthfully.
And then God showed up and comforted her one very lonely night, hugging her, and kissing her tenderly on the forehead.
'I guess you are learning your lesson about the devil and his dues,' he said in a careful and gentle, but definitely firm and corrective tone.
Ruth nodded soberly.
She had indeed learned about the Devil and his dues, now. She had indeed.
And then God was gone in the morning, and Ruth was left alone, once more, with her song, with her pride. Most definitely with her pride.
This story is dedicated to 'Roxette', 'Adele', 'Mika' and 'The Sound of Music'
The soundtracks to its composition.
'Old King David was a merry old soul, was a merry old soul was he. He likes to do drugs when the Rabbis not around and commit adultery.'
'Definitely an adulterer,' smirked Ruth at Daniel's witty song, just played on the banjo.
'Shaddup Callodyn,' said King David.
'Oh, David,' said Ruth. 'We're just having fun.'
'I don't do drugs,' said King David defensively. 'Never, ever, ever, in my whole life, have I ever done one illicit drug.'
Callodyn reached down to KDs satchel, picked it up, pulled out a small plastic bag with suspicious looking grasslike substance in it and
said 'Really, David?'
'Doh,' responded the King, and got up, grabbed his bag and satchel, and proceded to spend the afternoon sulking.
Later on that afternoon Ruth, again for the week, put on 'Last Day on Earth', by Kate Miller-Heidke.
'You know,' said King David to his Great-grand-mother, 'I do know where he is living.'
She looked at him despairingly. 'I don't care. I don't give a fucking damn.'
'Language,' scolded Callodyn, sitting with Kayella, working on a jigsaw.
'But you miss him,' said King David.
'What would a Bulldog know? And I should know, I'm one of them.'
David shrugged. He was wearing his Canterbury Bankstown Bulldog T-Shirt he had purchased a long time ago when he started supporting the club. Right back at the beginning. It was one Terry Lamb had owned and sold on Ebay. It had cost him a fortune, but he had never regretted it.
'Don't dis the doggies,' said Callodyn, one of the biggest supporters of the team.
'Bite me,' said Ruth.
'One thing Adele told me once,' started Kayella.
'Who's Adele,' interrupted Ruth.
'Adele Adkins. The pop singer,' said Kayella.
'Oh yes, Adele,' said Ruth, just remembering she had the '21' CD in her collection.
'Anyway,' continued Kayella. 'One thing she said was that, at times, you just have to let go. Of a relationship. When it isn't working. She had been through a number of men, and they had left her, and she had written sad songs about them. She got used to letting them go.'
'There's a scripture,' said David. 'Cast your bread upon the waters.'
'And in many days it will come back to you,' said Callodyn. 'But I have always thought it will only come back to you if it is yours, in the end. Is he Ruth?' asked Daniel, looking very soberly into Ruth's eyes. 'Is he yours? Forever yours? Your one and only?'
The song played on, coming to an end, and Ruth was looking straight at Daniel, right into his eyes, and then turned away.
She walked over to her bookcase, shuffled around for a while, opened a lower compartment, and fished out Adele's '21' album. She put the track 'Someone like you,' on and, as the small group listened, she stood at the window, looking through the curtains, waiting. Waiting.
You see, Boaz had had enough. He had left Ruth, left her with all her erratic behaviour, all her wild ways. He had gone off, found somewere in the stars, and while Ruth would not say she missed him or needed him, everyone knew it. Ruth especially. Ruth most of all.
Boaz undid the nut, took the wheel off, rolled it to the side, and the alarm went off. Lunch time. He wiped the oil off his hands, washed them briefly, as he would wash them properly that night, and sat at his workbench, opened his cheese and tomato sandwich, and started eating. Thirsty, he got out a coin, went to the Coke machine, bought a vanilla coke, and sipped away.
Jacinth came in, his worker.
'The Bentley is finished,' she said.
He looked over at the flash car. 'Many problems?'
'Nothing the most competent worker on Alderan 7 can't handle.'
He picked up a small nut, threw it at her, but she caught it.
'Gotcha,' she smiled, and sat down next to him.
'So, boss. Where are you from? I have been asking for months now. You never hint at much.'
He munched on his sandwiches and looked at his pretty assistant. She was young, less than 400, and with a very buxom chest. Blonde, a killer figure, and working as a mechanic. Go figure.
'Lots of places, Jace.'
'Like were,' she said, picking up his other sandwich, despite him smacking at her hand.
'You know. Here and there.'
'Right,' she said. 'Same old run around.'
'All you need to know is I pay your wages and that is that.'
'Gotcha,' she said again.
They munched in silence for a while and she looked at the nudie girl calendar on the wall. 'Don't you get urges, though? For a woman? You must masturbate, I guess.'
'Jacinth,' he said, in a rebuking but kindhearted tone.
'I mean, come on. Your obviously straight, so what figures? Do you have a secret woman that I don't know about? I have been to your place and never seen the sign of any lady? Or do you got out to the edge of town? You know? The red light district?'
'Come on, Jacinth. Change the subject.'
'Seriously,' she said, sipping on his Coke. 'Your a guy. What gives?'
He looked at her sternly, took the can of Coca Cola from her hand, and said, 'You can call the owner of the Bentley when your lunchbreak is over. I'll do up the costings.'
'Fine,' she said. 'But I'll find out one way or another.'
'You do that,' he said.
Later on, when she had finished up for the day, he looked at the figures. A standard week. Business was ok. Profits were about as usual. He had a good reputation, a quality mechanic, did a good job. His 4 year assistant, a friend he had made at the Stamp Club's daughter, did a good job. Weird, with looks like hers. He would have expected a modelling career or some such other work, but she wanted to be a mechanic her old man had maintained. Still, Jacinth did first class work and, when he moved on, which he eventually would, he would leave her the business. She would do well.
He looked at the figures and, on an urge, got out his wallet and looked at the picture of Ruth encased in a plastic sleeve.
'So you do have a woman,' said Jacinth from behind him, snatching at the picture. She managed to grab it from his hand, but he didn't resist too much.
'What's her name?' she asked after a moment.
'Ruth,' he said, absentmindedly. And then a penny dropped.
'Ruth? Ruth and Boaz? Just a second?' she looked at him, then, and an old image, from youth, of a face she had seen on a religion special, seemed to come to mind. 'Your not, you know. That biblical guy. King David's grandfather or something. He married Ruth.'
'Your religious?' he asked her.
'Just a little. A practicing Catholic. I go about once a year, but I never miss Christmas. I think that is practicing.'
'I guess,' he said, taking the photo back and putting it back in his wallet.
'So, are you?' she asked him.
He looked at her for a moment, and thoughts of his name pervaded his head. Even here, out at the edge of nowIhere, on a distant planet from anywhere, he was known. Somehow he and Ruth were forever linked and his destiny, whatever it held, seemed incapable of escaping that recurring, inevitable, truth.
'Go on. Get. I'll give you a bonus if you don't mention this.'
She nodded. He had confirmed what she thought.
When Jacinth had left for the day he took the photo out again and, despite telling himself time and time again that his self imposed exile was necessary to teach Ruth a good lesson on just what he had been thinking of her recent behaviour, a lovestring had tugged at him, and it was time to go. Time to go home. Time to find his wife. Time to work it out - all over again.
'Ruth. You are an idiot.'
'Put in the pong ball.'
'I have played this thing heaps. It is totally random. The machine is a cheat.'
'Trust me. She said. Now wait. When it is just about to hit the end, put in the ball. Just a centimetre before.'
Callodyn shrugged, did as told, and the fourth and final ball landed on the 5 again. He almost swore.
'How did you know?' he asked her.
'It works on a half hour cycle. I have been playing it here for years. I don't let them know though,' she said.
The vendor of the Clown Head tent pointed to the top shelf of prizes. 'Whatever you want, Ruthie,' said the fat Italian man.
'Get me the elephant,' said Daniel, practically begging her. She chose the monkey.
Later on, as they were driving home from the fair, Daniel with his new pet monkey, which they had both named 'Michael', after a certain pop singer, Ruth's mood was down again. She was quiet, sombre, not saying much. It had been this way for months now.
And then, back at her place, when he was about to leave, he heard 'Last day on Earth,' playing again, and he sighed. Poor, poor, Ruthie.
He went over in the morning, sat with her at the breakfast table, and they began a heart to heart.
'Why did he leave?' he finally asked her.
She looked at him coldly.
'I mean, come on Ruth. It's about time you faced up to it. Why did he leave?'
'Coz he hates me,' she said, and lit another cigarette. He grabbed it out of her hand and looked at her sternly.
'Ask my bloody shrink,' she said, defiantly lighting another cigarette.
'And what does he say?' he asked, taking a cigarette of his own.
'That it's all my bloody fault.'
'And what do you think of that?'
'That I need a new therapist.'
He just looked at her sternly, shaking her head. 'Let me tell you a story, he said.
'Here we go,' she said sarcastically. He ignored her.
He picked up the monkey and began his tale. 'There was this monkey, named Michael.'
She smiled at that.
'And Michael had a crush on another female monkey. But she wouldn't go with him. And he didn't know why?'
'And what happened,' she asked him, when he didn't continue.
'He died,' he said blackly.
She stared daggers at him, puffed on her cigarette, and then put her head in front of her, on the table, and started sobbing softly.
'The story improves. Later on, in heaven, he met this lady again. She had changed. She had softened. She was - kinder.'
'And?' queried Ruth, her eyes full of tears, looking up at him.
'Funnilly enough,' said Daniel, 'they lived happily ever after.'
She wiped her eyes. She felt better.
'But there was a moral,' he said to her.
'She had to change. It killed him, of course. But she changed, in the end. She saw the light.'
Ruth nodded, looking at Michael the monkey.
She needed to change.
Three months passed. Ruth, strangely, started cheering up. In her conversations with Daniel he noticed her cheerier outlook, and the cigarettes diminshed. The song, also, finally stopped playing.
Yet, one morning, Callodyn was reading the paper and it had the heading 'Judgement Day is here?' it was actually about a court case involving one of the royal members of the Televon royal family, but it was also a portent.
He sat with Ruth, who seemed better, and she smiled at Daniel and put on the song again.
'Jesus,' he said, but she just smiled at him, in a tweed dress, a lovely jumper, and looking formal and beautiful.
And then there was a knock on the door. Daniel got up, opened it, and as the song chorus when 'And you've come back to me,' Boaz smiled at Daniel, came inside, sat down next to Ruth, who didn't look at all shocked, and cradled her in his arms.
He had come back to her.
* * * * *
Later on that year, with things, relatively speaking, back to normal, God's theophany came around to chat with Callodyn.
Daniel showed him the monkey. God smiled at it, asked for it, and Daniel didn't say no.
And, later that afternoon, in one of God's mysterious abodes on the edge of never, a little monkey named Michael was placed next to another little monkey named Michelle, and, once and for all, everything was again right in the universe. Everything was again right.
This story is dedicated to Natasha Bedingfield,
whose 'Soulmate' song was the soundtrack to this story's composition. And
to 'Kelly Clarkson', who is Callodyn's 'Forever' soulmate.
'Your out of control, Ruth!'
'Live a little, Daniel.'
Holding onto the dashboard, as Ruth sped the vehicle up above 120 kms, above the legal limit, was way too much living as far as Daniel was concerned. Some girls, like Ruth, never really learned their lessons, it seemed. But she looked over at him, sensed he was nervous, and slowed down. Enough fun for one day.
They arrived at their destination - a nightclub up in a city north of Paradision. One of the more daring kinds, which was rare on Televon, perhaps the most conservative of planets in the heavenlies. Daniel knew that David had probably gotten his drugs here. Ruth wanted to go along. Boaz wasn't interested. She asked him and Katy. Katy said no, and Taylor and Kayella weren't interested. Mandy was away for now, off with a new boyfriend funnilly enough, so that left Daniel. He thought better of it. She persuaded him against his will.
The ironic thing, it was a chain of nightclubs throughout the heavenlies, Elton John one of the partners who owned the chain. That much was obvious from the picture of him in the foyFer. They knew Ruth, as the bouncer had let them in with no questions upon seeing her, but Callodyn was not used to this kind of nightlife. Far more conservative, though he did like the kind of music they played at these places.
The 'Macarena' was playing, and it was after 11, the right time to show up according to Ruth, and she got him out on the dance floor.
They danced, and then a slower song came on. She put her arms, instinctively, around his shoulders, and as it played, she looked into his eyes.
'Do you like me, Daniel?'
'I'm a married man, Ruth.'
'So am I,' she said. She pushed her head forward, to kiss him, but he pulled back.
'Your nuts,' he said, and made to leave the dance floor, but she pulled him back, and was more formal. But another slow song came on, a romantic one, and she tried again. Put her head forward, kissed him on the mouth, and he let go. There they were, pashing on the dance floor, in a nightclub with a questionable reputation, one step away from committing adultery.
Later on, they got back to her car. She pushed the button, and the hood came over, and she looked at him. 'I like you, Danny. You know. I've always liked you.'
'Its getting late,' he said nervously.
'Not too late for this,' she said, and bent her head down, fumbled at his trousers, and released his erection. She looked up at him. 'Boaz doesn't ever have to know.'
He wanted to stop her. He couldn't do this. They were married. But he had known her for so long, and he was dreadfully aroused from their kissing, and then before he could object any more, her tongue was on his phallus, and he moaned, and she rubbed his cock, circling her tongue skillfully over his head, and he exploded come into her mouth. There. He had done it. Committed adultery.
Guilt. Seven months of guilt, and Boaz came around, asked why he hadn't been visiting, and he was ready to confess there and then. But, as much as he wanted a clear conscience, he just couldn't confess to Boaz.
And then the Theophany came around, and they chatted, and he smiled at Daniel, and gave him a little wink when he left, for Daniel had said nothing, but God knew all.
It became a syndrome, avoiding the neighbours, but after 3 solid years Daniel had just about had enough. And then Boaz invited him around for a game of snooker, and they were playing, and he confessed his sin.
'It doesn't surprise me,' said Boaz.
Daniel was stunned by the reaction. 'Huh?'
'Well. She's done it before. Quite a number of times recently, but there were - occurences - in the older days. Very rare, but occasionally she strayed.'
'And that doesn't bother you?' asked Callodyn, bemused.
Boaz looked sober in his response. 'Daniel. When you are in a relationship which has somehow lasted as long as mine and Ruth's has, well, you know.'
'These things are par for the course,' said Daniel, lining up his shot.
'Exactly,' responded Boaz.
'Does she party, much? Now?'
'A bit. Its a side of her I am gradually getting used to. You know when it emerged. Its not really a change in her. Just something which has long lain dormant. It might be permanent. I don't really know.'
'And that doesn't bother you?'
'It bothers the hell out of me,' he said. 'But what can you do, huh? What? Leave her? We have been together forever. And besides, I don't think I can love another like I love Ruthie. Not now.'
'So you just live with it?'
'Until she grows out of it,' said Boaz.
Daniel nodded, looking at his neighbour. He was a courageous man. To accept Ruth for what she was. He guessed, there and then, such patience was what was required for relationships to last forever. Forever and ever.
Ruth finally came around a few weeks later, and things got back to normal gradually. But he was extra cautious, this time, as the founder of Haven Noahide Fellowship could not afford the slur of adulterer against his name. Yet, he thought on King David, and the grace of God, and felt, perhaps, that was a little extreme. He was only human, after all. Wasn't he?
The months passed, and things were normal, except Daniel still felt some guilt. And then, the guilt being too much, he had to get away. To a quiet place. To a private place. To confess his soul and rethink his values. Just what made Callodyn the Cherubim tick. But, in the end, Kayella insisted and said she knew what was bothering him, so he didn't argue.
'Why be so puritanical, Danny,' said Kayella. 'You know, in real life, these things just happen. We can't prevent them. We never really could. We just learn from them and move on. What, did you expect to be infallible forever?'
'No,' he said, hotly in response.
'So get over it then, bro,' she quickly replied.
And so he tried to get over it.
But the guilt didn't go away.
Daniel was crying. He didn't cry often. Kayella was on the beach, a distance away. She came to him.
'Do you believe there is a soulmate for everyone?' she asked him.
He dried his eyes, and held his twin. 'Something happened between me and Ruth.'
'I know,' she said. And he knew she wasn't lying.
Later that afternoon. 'I can divorce them. Katy and Taylor. We can go away. Like we once said.'
'And Mandy? And the others?'
'I can't live with this guilt, Kay. I can't. I, I can't cheat on you again.'
'But will it last? Forever, Danny? Forever?'
The child of heaven, Daniel, appeared to Callodyn that night in a dream. Dream - the Sandman - held an hourglass. He stared into Daniel, deep, deep, into the heart of his soul. 'See the sands?'
'There is only 1 grain left. Soon it will fall.'
'And then?' asked Callodyn.
'Your life is finished.'
'I'm going to die?' he asked.
'No,' said the Sandman. 'Your lessons are finished. There is no more to teach. Don't fuck up, ok. Don't fuck up.'
And Daniel watched. And the grain fell. And the Sandman smiled, and turned the glass over, and the first grain sat there, burning itself into his heart, and it fell, and the secoond hour of his existence began.
Daniel was out the front of his Paradision house. Ruth was there. Boaz had said goodbye yesterday.
'Will I see you again, Daniel?'
'I don't know, Ruthie. I don't know.'
'Then Goodbye, Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly. Goodbye.'
He smiled at her, and clasped her hand. It had been a journey with Ruth. A long, long journey. He clasped her hands, looked into her eyes, and kissed her cheek.
And he got into the car, with Kayella in the next seat, and he waved, and he drove away. And he did not return to Paradision for a very, very, very long time.
Ruth looked at the photo of Daniel, in her hands, 3 years later. He had been a good neighbour, and perhaps one day he would return. For he had not sold the place, and had asked Boaz to keep an occasional eye on it.
Strange. You got used to someone. Expected them to be their forever. Forever. And then Boaz walked in, smiled at her, and she knew what price had been paid. She knew.
Millions and millions of years passed in the Realm of the Heavenlies. 300 million of them, all told. And Ruth had adventure after adventure. But, as the saying goes, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Boaz remained the same, ever true, ever by her side. They had 3 children in all that time, not prepared much anymore to do the inevitable letting go which seemed inevitable in a life which had yet to choose to forego new offspring. Boaz wanted a million of them, so he claimed, and they were a long way off that, but he was adamant on that decision. After that she could leave off praying to God for replenishment of her eggs, which was how new eggs usually came along after a long while for a woman. She didn't mind, she loved Boaz, but, inevitably, while she wouldn't say it, something old had creeped in. One of the oldest of banes of a long life. In fact, the oldest. Boredom.
It wasn't that she didn't love Boaz. She did. Very much so. But in all the beautiful roses, and lovely chocolates, and dinner dates, and all the other lovely things he did for her, there was one word which flashed through her mind over and over again. Predictability. The excitement, now, was well and truly gone.
And then the old devil, her long lost neighbour, Daniel showed up, with Kelly, Taylor, Katy, and another face she couldn't quite place, with a tribe full of squabbling kids, and Ruth laughed. The more things changed, the more they stayed the same.
'Alleluia,' she sang, rushing out to hug Daniel. 'My Saviour.'
'Brother,' swore Taylor, and started yelling at her arguing kids about an ipod, the ownership of which had been disputed.
'Thank you, God,' said Ruth, looking to the heavenlies. 'Thank you.'
'Lighten up, Cross boy,' quipped Daniel at Jesus comment.
'Go to hell, Danny,' said the Nazarean. 'And don't bloody call me Cross Boy. I can't begin to tell you how much that pisses me off.'
'Cross boy?' queried Axel, Nimorel young teen to Callodyn. 'Why the hell you calling him Cross boy?'
Nimorel looked at her son and, funnily, realized again how young he was, and the isolation, for the most part, they had lived in in the last century or so.
'The cross of Calvary,' said Taylor, nursing young Jezebel in her arms.
'Calvary?' asked Axel.
Jesus looked at the young lad. A fresh young innocent Noahide. Never heard of his ultimate sacrifice.
'You'll find out,' said Daniel, and returned his gaze to Jesus. 'Now, like I said, JC. Leave Ruthie alone. That's old news.'
'She never confessed it to me,' said Yeshua.
'What's adultery?' asked young Janine, Kayellas new daughter.
Kayella didn't respond, but looked at Daniel anxiously.
'I know what adultery is,' said Axel, a smirk on his face. The young 15 year old had learned that much. 'King David did it. It's in the bible.'
'And Daniel is guilty,' said Jesus,' looking at his adversary and the also guilty looking Ruth.
'Like I said, Yesh. It's old news. Long ago. I got that off my chest a long time ago.'
'Such a paragon of virtue,' said Jesus, shaking his head. 'Not quite as clean cut as he likes to give the impression he is. Humm. Holy, huh.'
'You are such a fundamentalist,' said Ruth, still embarassed.
'Who isn't,' said Jesus.
'Aint that the truth,' said Kayella.
'Look, it was only one occasion. And it never happened again,' said Daniel defensively.
'Tell it to the judge,' said Jesus, but there was a soft grin. He had him. Had some dirt, finally, on an old adversary.
'And you have never fucked up?' asked Taylor to the Christ Child. 'God knows, I have heard so many debates on the issue, but Daniel does maintain, as I think God himself usually agrees, you weren't necessarily crucified to save the world. Weren't you a bit of a hellraiser? A rebel.'
'A rebel with a cause,' said Jesus. 'The jews at the time needed rebuking.'
Kayella remained silent. That had been her faith, once. She'd changed. Not adopted anything, really, now. Not even an attempt at following religion. Just being herself. Just being Kayella. But she, silently, thought Jesus had a point. Some things didn't really change in her hearts youthful choices on life.
'God forgives the repentant. It was a mistake. I acknowledge that. But I don't shy away from still trying to be decent. To be holy. I still try to follow the faith genuinely.'
Jesus was about to say something, but stopped. 'Yeh. Ok. I forgive you. I deal with this shit all th