Chronicles of the
Children of Destiny
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
Copyright 6177 SC (in the adjusted HNF Calendar) / 2014 CE/AD
The Authority in the Realm of Eternity
Jacob and Callodyn
Burn: The Shadow of Draven
Samael, Logos & Aphrayel
The Way of the Eternal Dove
The First Sermon
Daniel and Mum
Who is the Messiah?
Who Cares Babe?
Callodyn and Kayella – First and the Last
Stuck in Henty
The Dominion of Noah
History of the Eternal World
Matrel and Monkeyman go Fishing
Matriggles and Co
A Woman of Her Own Making
Frok, Fruk & Frak and their Eckist Haven
Frak and Shaladyel
Matrel, Monkeyman and Bilstiki Go Fishing
Kayella Princess of Perfection
An Afternoon with Taylor
The Cherubim Sandra – Dreams II
The Vision of Cleopatra
Beyond the End
The Days of Summer Past II
The Heart of Cleopatra
4 O'Clock 9
Monkeyman to the Rescue
Crazy Days 2
Lord of the Chocolate Cakes
The New Life of Cleopatra
Revenge of the Dark Circle
4 O'Clock 10
Strange New Gods
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath II
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath III
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath IV
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath V
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath VI
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath VII
Life Goes On
Stuck in Merriman
4 O'Clock 11
A Surprising Harvest
4 O'Clock 12
4 O'Clock 13
Kantriel and Shantriel
Stuck in Tinderry
Monkeyman to the Rescue 2
Who Cares Babe? 2
A Lazy Day of Live
Citydale Next Left
All's Fair in Love and Messianic Bitching
Callodyn and Kayella IV
Lucy Potter and the Confused Marcus Chuan Chi Chin
A Day of Fantasy II
A Glimpse of Hope and Unity II
God the Father II
Daniel's Fabulous Soul-Winning Techniques 2
Life at Golden Fries V
Saruviel the Dreaded Antichrist II
Life in Kadravana II
Everyday Happenings in the Realm of Eternity II
The Tears of Amy Lee III: The Complaint of Amy Lee
Angel of Wonder
Like Mother, Like Daughter
The Macarthur Chronicles – 1 – Westerwall
The Macarthur Chronicles – 2 – Stability
The Macarthur Chronicles – 3 – Peace
Callodyn and Kayella V: Never
Callodyn and Kayella VI: Experience
Callodyn and Kayella VII: Beautiful Disaster
Callodyn and Kayella VIII: Competitive Behaviours
The Christ of his Generation
The Warrior of Virtue
Callodyn and Kayella IV: Who is Callodyn of Eternity?
Onwards For All Eternity
The Children of Destiny
The Authority in the Realm of Eternity
'Very well,' said the Theophany of God. 'I have examined both of your works, and I have reviewed your time in the positions. I officially sanction you Daniel as the Arch-Regent of the Realm of Eternity, one of the Key Founders of the Advancing Noah Movement, which I expect you to watch over and maintain.'
'As you will my lord,' said Daniel bowing.
'And you, Valandriel, I officially sanction you as Prime Minister of the Realm of Eternity. I understand you are a member of Haven Noahide Fellowship?'
'That is correct,' replied Valandriel.
'Then keep that faith, study its Torah, and rule with wisdom and skill. You represent the Rainbow Covenant of Noah, and Noahidism, so rule well and do not bring disaster on us. Or God help us all.'
Valandriel bowed, and God left.
'We did it bro,' said Daniel. 'We're number one.'
'Well your number two,' said Valandriel.
'Here we go again,' replied Daniel, and they fell to, yet again, the tom foolery of Daniel the Seraphim and Valandriel, Angels Supreme of the Realm of Eternity.
'Jacob. Are you gay?'
'Fuck off Edom.'
'Seriously, bro. I have been wondering. It's all these sodomites hanging around these days. In Israel's spirit of reconciliation with those whom they are responsible for having persecuted. I mean, come on bro. Fuck the fags.'
'Well, apparently that is what I am doing, according to you, Esau.'
'Yeh. Possibly. But come on, bro. Keep the faith, ok. We don't fuck around with homos. They are not our cup of tea. Sodom and Gomorrah was nuclearized because of their sick behaviours.'
'You haven't learned societies PC rules then, I take it,' said Jacob. 'In these last 25 years that is all Madonna Ciccone has been teaching me. The morals and values of modern america. Gay is ok, so she says. Times have changed. People are more merciful now. Let love rule. Live and let live. And all that jazz.'
Kobblers,' said Edom. 'An excuse to justify their sins. Nothing more.'
'No. It is the mercy of life which it offers us. Besides, I have been studying with Moses. On documentary theories. Things are being resolved, and Neviim theology is starting to come along. We weren't quite right in Torah.'
'So what,' said Esau. 'It served our purposes. Got the world straight.'
'But it is not how they want it, and there is no point in persuading a person against their will. Miss Ciccone teaches me that people will be people and people will do what people will do and that torah says this and that torah says that but people make up their own bloody minds in the end anyway. So we live and let live, she maintains, and that is pretty much that.'
''Yet we intervene on life as we have traditionally done,' said Esau. 'And establish the Kingdom of God.'
'They have accepted that. Most agree to conform to quite strict torah standards. It is not a problem. They like flexibility. They like grease for their machine, also, so Miss Ciccone says. It is enough, in my viewpoint. Political Correctness - sensitivity - is in our own best interests as a people in the long term. We may as well go with the flow.'
When Edom got home, he considered Jacob's point, on sensitivity. It was in their best interests in the long term. He got out his old Koran, and threw it in the bin, and went off that afternoon, bought a copy of the Celestine Prophecy, and proceded to chart a course for understanding, getting along, and a more sensitive to the fairer sex appeal on issues moral and otherwise.
Jacob and Callodyn
Jacob was an ordinary sort of pilgrim. The Eternal World. Here they all were, and God had finally announced the whole world of the dead would be rising, very soon, after a good long rest and repentance in Sheol. Bastard, Jacob thought of God. Tell us they are doomed forever. Bastard. 'Well they were, sort of,' said the Theophany to him. 'I mean, it literally has been forever. Practically.' And he smiled that divine smile, and Jacob said 'Bastard,' again. 'Go talk to Callodyn, you idiot,' said Jehovah.
Jacob found his way to Callodyn's address.
'What's your problem, Haven idiot,' said Jacob.
'My my, the father of Israel. Come to 7DF to convert has he?'
'BS. Your religion is as redundant...'
But before he could finish, 'As Judaism I suppose,' perked in Callodyn.
Jacob smiled a little.
'No, son of Cyril. I have not come to convert to 7DF. I have come to study your doctrine, and will pay well and thoroughly for the service. I realize you require eternal converts, otherwise we may not keep your documents, which, under the law, is kosher. We do not do this in Judaism, because WE ARE a light to the nations, but you have proved otherwise with your own statements.'
'Only on theology,' replied Callodyn. 'And our personal Daly Bible for the Daly Clan which I started compiling. But the Chronicles of the Children of Destiny have and always will remain in the Public domain. There is sufficient theological halakah in there, and it is longer than the Tankah, so bite me Jacob.'
The Holy Spirit whispered to Jacob's heart. 'He is correct on that point son.'
'Mmm,' said Jacob. 'Then I will study the Chronicles of the Children of Destiny with yourself, purchase copies, and pay handsomely. If you will accept the payment.'
Callodyn looked at him, and sat down on 'Zero Seat' which was a green swivel chair he rarely sat on except when he wanted to think about something. Taylor, noticing, got up and gave him a cigarette and lit it for him.
'She seems well trained,' said Jacob.
'Get stuffed,' said Callodyn. 'She does certain personal things for me, but I NEVER order her around. I have great respect for my wives. I also do things for her, and will lover her forever.'
'He's not a masculinist,' said Taylor. 'Despite the image he likes to maintain.'
Jacob nodded softly, taking in that information.
Callodyn smoked his ciggie, and turned to the small laptop. He turned it on.
'Oh, goodie,' said Taylor. 'It's on again.'
Callodyn started playing a celebrity porno game he had invented, and Jacob looked on amused as Callodyn's avatar scored Madonna in a private sex scene. Callodyn's avatar illicited this response from the Madonna avatar. 'You have served well, subject. You may make the decision of your choice.'
'Lucky,' said Taylor. 'She's hard to get approval from.'
'Fascinating game,' said Jacob.
'Madonna has spoken. I can make my own choice on this subject. Very well then, Master Israel. At an exceedingly exorbitant price I will train young grasshopper in the ways of the force.'
Jacob just stared at him.
'Hope you have a gold credit card,' said Taylor. 'Sensei Splinter is very fussy.'
'Wonderful,' said Jacob sarcastically.
And the world turned. And the world turned.
Burn: The Shadow of Draven
'Tis a dark soul, Tina.'
'A broken soul?' she asked her man.
'Funny. Ha ha. I feel him, his shadow still. Haunting me. Draven, the bane of my dreams. The worst of hell's demon's, mocking me still. As if this New Earth had verily vanquished him..........yet. It had. And we were at peace. And a dream followed....'
Tina looked eerily into space, out the window, into the skyline of Sydney. 'And then we were not. And as if something else entirely.'
'Yet then we were,' continued Broken. 'As if an eternity had transpired, yet no time at all.'
'And so many speak of this,' she said softly.
'The Wisdom of God. I understand not,' said Broken.
'But there was something before, I can't remember,' she said. 'Some greater thing we were part of, yet not now? Not now?'
'A greater world?' he said, looking at her. 'That is what it was. Some grand climax of things, some great battle. But the old world faded, and we don't remember much when the new world was born. It all began again. Funny, that. Just like he promised us in holy Word.'
'The Counsel says not to trouble our minds. For here we are, and our world is new, and the future awaits,' she said smiling.
'And Draven torments me,' said Broken.
She touched his arm. 'He tormented many. He rots in hell I hope. He rots eternal.'
'Let us hope so,' said Broken.
'I will fix your dark soul. And bring in light. I love you, you know,' she said to him.
He smiled at those words, and looked with love upon his wife.
'What tomorrow?' he asked her.
'Back to work, I suppose. Back to Woolworths. Those shelves don't stack themselves, you know.'
'And we need the money,' he sighed. 'But don't fret. I'll get my job back. I only quit in tormented dreams. I feel, now, a little better. Even now. I can work again.'
'Nonsense. You rest. You recover. I will work. We own our home, so the bills are not too high. And we have forever, now. Don't we. I mean, forever right?'
'It is what they teach. The 4 Archangels swear this to us. Any accident will result in resurrection after a few weeks of consolation in a heavenly place. Yes, eternity. Still getting my head around it really.'
'It's strange,' she said.
'How,' he asked.
'That it could be, so.............Normal.'
'Life goes on, sweetie.'
'And I have work in the morning. So are we getting pizza or what?'
Broken grinned. 'As long as there are heaps of anchovies.'
'Mama mia,' said Tina. 'Aren't I spicy enough for you?'
And Broken laughed, and they hugged, and the shadow of Draven, for a moment, fled back to the darkness. For a moment anyway.
Samael, Logos & Aphrayel
'A Dove is a simple bird,' said Logos. 'It is gentle, unassuming, and perfect for bloody sacrifice.'
'Charming,' said Samael.
'Oh, he loves that bloody Jewish Torah,' said Aphrayel. 'Think's he's the Christ of God's greater glory I think.'
'Don't compare me with the Jesus fuckwit,' said Logos. 'God was telling me he was going to meld us together unless I improved my sarcasm from evil to mildly malevolent.'
'You've got some way to go,' suggested Samael.
'Logos never has some way to go,' responded Logos. 'His near infinite mind is always patently aware of his choices and his ability to make decisions right in the now of this infinity. I choose to progress to his satisfaction at a leisurely place.'
'You'll get there,' said Aphrayel, smiling.
Logos just glared at her.
'You know, your like a dove,' said Samael to Logos. 'Innocent in many ways, kind of flighty, and pure as snow.'
'Marvellous that you've noticed,' responded Logos.
'But you drop shit on a lot of people,' said Samael, grinning. Logos did not respond. His look said it all.
'Aphrayel,' began Logos. 'Michael has no longer any interest. Why is that?'
'Samael has gotten over Rachel. Left her at Televon airport, and hasn't seen her for a century now.'
'Your devoted,' commented Logos. 'Marry the woman, but leave her. You know God doesn't like divorce.'
'It wasn't working out,' said Samael. 'Too human for my liking.'
'She's cherubim. And Ketravim,' said Logos.
'Now,' replied Samael. 'Only now. She's – simple – you know. Concerned with mundane matters. General living, but no excitement. Nothing to inspire a creative mind such as my own.'
'Vanity is a virtue in you it seems,' responded Logos.
'I'm sure your familiar with its tender caress,' replied Samael.
'Well, what about me?' asked Aphrayel. 'I'm an eternal dove. Perfect for the likes of a brother lost, but now found.'
'I've seen the light, have I?' asked Samael, smiling at Aphrayel. 'Nay, I think Sandalphon's steady determination to win you will triumph.'
'Sandy?' queried Aphrayel. 'Uh, no. Not Sandy. Um, sure. We sleep together from time to time. But not Sandy.'
'You say that with such disdain,' said Samael.
'Not Sandy,' said Aphrayel again.
'Well, I'll date you if Samael won't,' said Logos. Aphryael smiled, but looked at Samael, as did Logos.'
'I'm hungry,' said Samael. 'Think I'll go to the cafeteria.' And thus he exited the scene leaving an awkward Aphrayel aware of Logos keen attention.
The Way of the Eternal Dove
'The 70 Divine Principles of the Way of the Eternal Dove,' said Rachael the Ketravim to her fellow Ketravim in their little fellowship hall in south 'Harvestfield' village, somewhere on Televon.
'Sounds interesting,' said Jack Dagger. 'What's it about?'
'Yes, do tell,' said Cheryl Colson.
'It's a response to that ruddy New Agenda of Daniel's. If a man can do it, a woman can do it equally as well. And Samael was so damn jealous he told me to go to hell and have my own bloody religion, and flew off back to his coop, jealous as sin. A woman indeed. Fundamentalist Samaritan bastard. I hate him.'
'Certainly the way of peace then,' observed Jack Dagger.
Rachel gave him one of those looks.
'70 principles then,' said Cheryl. 'Tell us the first one.'
'The First. It reads 'Let Peace be found in the Centre of your Soul and Let it radiate calmly and flow in natural harmony'. And the rest are equally as wise and profound.'
'Illuminating,' said Jack. 'Just what a bent copper needs to do his job.'
'Your not that bent,' said Cheryl, cozying up next to him. 'You've got a heart of gold,' she said.
'Yep. Executioner of general scum and the likes of planet Televon's police force, known as 'Jack 'The Bastard' Dagger' to the crooks. Definitely a heart of gold.'
'Tough on crime shows love for God,' said Cheryl. 'And his laws.'
'Indeed,' responded Jack.
'So it's for the Ketravim,' said Cheryl, looking at the notebook on the desk in the fellowship hall office.
'The Ketravim Torah, huh?' asked Jack. 'We never really did get one of our own.'
'Torah? Perhaps,' said Rachel. 'But the way of peace, above all else. Gentle as doves. Eternal doves.'
'Sound's brill,' said Cheryl. 'You'll have to preach on the weekend on it. Sure the congregation will love it.'
'If they're not too set in their ways on Seraphim and Cherubim Torah,' stated Rachael flatly.
'Rachel Smith. They will love it,' said Cheryl. 'You won't let us down.'
'Let's hope not,' said Rachael the Ketravim.
The First Sermon
Henry Olusegun Adeola Samuel, better known as his stage identity name of the British R&B soul singer 'Seal' said it best. 'Brilliant fucking sermon, Rach.' Henry was also a Ketravim angel, up high on the list, and resided in Harvestfield these days, as most of the upper hierarchy of the Ketravim community did. It had been Albert Rothchild who had sought out the Ketravim from their discs of the Realm of Eternity, and stated that a commitment of prayer had been given by several thousand dedicated Karaite Hakham's for the spiritual blessing upon the township of Harvestfield should the early Ketravim decide to make a home there. They were interested in a few hundred. They got about Ten Thousand of them in the end. The Ketravim were the 6th group of Angels of the Realm of Eternity, logical, as Ketra meant 6 in the angelic tongue. They were special angels, whose origin for every last one of them had been simple humanity on earth, the ones chosen by God to be rebirthed as angelic identities. They were the chosen Ketravim, and it had been Rachel Smith, who at first was designated lastborn of the Cherubim, an addition to the original list, but who also then became firstborn of the Ketravim. Rachel Smith – wife of Samael of Infinity, one of the more popular angelic names in the universe. Rachel had never been officially the leader of the Ketravim. They had no leader except God. But, instead of leader, she had become the respected elder amongst them, and the one they felt should dictate much of the way of life and general attitudes of the Ketravim community as a whole. As good as a leader, when it all came down to it. Today, with about 50 elder Ketravim gathered at the main congregation hall for Harvestfield's Ketravim community, they had heard Rachael deliver to them the next part of the Ketravim agenda, so it seemed – The Way of the Eternal Dove. Their official religion, at last. Something finally for them. Since early times, the Ketravim had relied on the Seraphim and Cherubim Torah's as their official religion in the Spiritual universe. And that had sufficed, and that had been all well and good and that would do. But Rachel had found a little pride in her heart, eventually, for she was one of the humblest souls in existence, and she had sat down, with a notebook, staring at her husband Samael who watched TV most afternoons, and barely gave her a hug anymore, and wrote out her heart. It wasn't terribly long – a few hundred words, maybe a thousand or so. But in 70 principles, written down with a black pen, on a simple notebook, she had developed the religion which would change the world of the Ketravim community – forever.
Jonathon and Lucinda Holmes sat aside with Rachel, some of the oldest of the Ketravims, who had known Rachel on earth.
'You know. These are special days, Rachael. Special days. Remember them. Take some pictures, or something. Write about them. When our newborn world was young. Remember it,' said Jonathon.
'Thank you,' replied Rachel. 'Those words are kind.'
Lucinda looked at her best friend. 'Do you miss him, then? Do you miss him?'
Rachel sighed. 'Yes. When it all comes down to it, yes. But damn the man for his pride. If he can't stomach the firstborn of the Ketravim Angels of Eternity having a religion of her own, damn him straight to hell, masculinist bastard.'
'He'll come round,' said Lucinda.
'I'm not sure if I care,' said Rachel.
And so the congregation chatted, and took in its new religion, and Rachael was pleased, and gave barely a thought to Samael of Infinity. Barely a thought at all.
Delta Goodrem. Popular Aussie songstress, famous all over the universe for her quality pop albums, popular actress on neighbours, and best friend of David Smith, cousin of Rachel Smith, was a Ketravim of extraordinary dedication and passion. Today she and David had touched down in an airport just outside of Nadrazon city in the Realm of Infinity, on their way to meet Samael of Infinity. They were on a mission. David Smith, of course, was the angel Ambriel of the Realm of Eternity, 60th born of the Male Seraphim of Eternity. He was a Smith, proud and true, a dedicated Noahide and member of Haven Noahide Fellowship, the second 'President of the official Assemblies of the Advancing Noah Movement', next in line to Cherubim Daniel Daly, 347th of the Male Cherubim of Eternity. David's father was Alexander Smith, who had married a certain 'Rose Rothchild', and thus David had Jewish blood in him also. Yet he recognized himself primarily as Noahide, was uncircumcised, and followed the Noahide covenant because of his strong belief in Patriarchal dynasty determining religious Covenant of the Torah's obligation. The Smiths were not Jewish, but ultimately Noahide, and thus David had chosen Noahide faith, and joined the fledgling Haven Noahide Fellowship in its youth. Delta, on the other hand, was a Ketravim angel, a very early one also, and best friends with Rachel Smith and David. And David and herself had chatted at a cafe in Harvestfield for the last few weeks and decided Samael needed to learn his lesson on his pride, as Rachel would simply herself be too proud to chase after him and knock some common sense into him.
'He's a proud angel,' said David. 'It won't be easy.'
'He's a sucker for a short skirt,' said Delta, dressed in a red top and short black skirt. 'I'll sweet talk him.'
'The Samaritan bugger he is loves those sex laws, you know. The leviticus ones. Makes him impermeable to temptation,' said David.
'Callodyn is only human in the end,' said Delta. 'And Mr Bradlock knows hot legs when he sees them. He'll crack.'
'You hope so,' said David.
They landed, and charted their way through the airport, and were soon off to another section for the short flight up to Azion, the Golden City, atop the Realm of Infinity.
* * * * *
'Stubborn pride was the uncoming of the devil,' said Delta forthrightly.
'I know him well,' said Samael. 'He just liked to party, really.'
'Yes. But it was his arrogance against the rules of God which led to his fall,' commented David.
'And Rachel is following the rules of God?' queried Samael.
'We are not, ultimately, bound by terribly much,' said Delta. 'We follow the Seraphim and Cherubim Torah's of Eternity as Ketravim, but they have never been commanded to us. God has always left us to our own devices to work things out. What the hell is wrong with Rachael having a say, then?'
'Look, that doesn't bother me that much anyway,' said Samael honestly.
'Uh, what?' asked Delta.
'It's not really why I left. There were other reasons.'
'And what were they exactly?' inquired Delta.
Samael sort of turned and looked at a photo of Aphrayel on his bookcase, and looked back at Delta. 'Personal reasons.'
'Well. Well, then. At least let Rachel know that. She's really timid about it, if you really must know. Really pushing her agenda. And we like what we are getting.'
'You want my vote of approval? For your own Ketravim community?' asked Samael.
'Your her husband, damn you,' replied Delta hotly.
'Mmm,' said Samael. 'Leave it with me then. I'll visit her soon enough I'd imagine.'
'Well, well,' said Delta, a little confused at how easy it had been. 'Well ok then.'
'Would you two like to go out to dine at a fine Nadrazon restaurant I know?' asked Samael.
'Sure,' said David, before Delta could interrupt.
'I'll make a booking,' said Samael.
And so they had been victorious, a little more easily than they had anticipated, but later, as Delta sat eating her Italian pasta, she began to think about what she had actually learned of the Way of the Eternal Dove and, with a new spiritual paradigm of destiny ruling their lives, what strange new possibilities awaited the future of the Ketravim community. Time would tell on that. Time would tell indeed.
'Take them to the pit of despair. Take them to the holocaust of damnation. Teach them hell itself,' said Satan, between thick smoke from his cigar.
'Yes, my master,' responded the Saruvim Samaen. 'It shall be as you say.'
'And remember, that fuckwit Abaddon has betrayed the code of darkness. Chums, these days, practically, with those Eckist lightbringer idiots. He is not fit to wear the name of Saruvim Angel. You must restore our reputation of fear, intimidation and outright plague amongst the children of God. For we shall never rule in fear if a member fucks off and starts playing 'Hangman' with teeny weeny little members of Doreen Virtue fanatics. Oh my fucking God. He writes me emails, you know. Hey Satan. How you doing. Life is good now. I've really found a new life. I mean, I believe again, and all sorts of the most pathetic God nonsense you could not fucking believe Sammy.'
'Don't worry. I shall not fail you,' grinned Samaen. 'The world has yet to truly understand the fear and wrath of Samaen the Saruvim.'
'Good scumbag. Now the Ketravim have been largely untouched by us for the most part. Yet now they have a new agenda. The way of the eternal dove, from what my sources reveal to me. And with a new agenda comes a heartache of fresh new zeal to battle the darkness. For fuck's sake, it never fucking changes. Get themselves up and running, and after a few years, and a few minor successes, they think they can battle the devil himself. Time for their coming of age, Samaen. Time for their coming of age.'
'The wickedness I shall impart upon their very souls will be more malevolent than the diarrhoea of Samael of Heaven himself.'
Satan considered that. 'You know, that's pretty fowl actually. I've seen some of his shit. Not pleasant stuff.'
'You want me to use shit?' asked Samaen confused.
'Dickhead, just use your fucking imagination. Shit, if necessary. Always useful stuff. But fuck them, up. As simple as that. Fuck them up.'
'Thine will be done, most unholy lord of evil.'
'Then go,' said Satan dramatically. 'As I need a shit myself.'
And Samaen departed, and, verily, Satan did go off for a shit. And it was most fowl indeed.
Daniel and Mum
Daniel Daly and his mother Mary Daly were drinking some coffee at 29 Merriman Crescent were they lived.
'Robot is ready,' said Daniel. 'The programming is very strong. Jehovah has been helping me with it, and its defence mechanisms are perfect. Ambriel and Michael won't get through.'
'You really should take that 7th level PHD in Nanotechnology,' said Mary. 'It's become legally available to you recently. We need to stay alert and strong to the adversaries. They don't really give much mercy any more, son.'
Daniel softened. 'Greg and Dad will protect us in an emergency. Ambriel and Michael don't even understand dad's sound defence technology. And Greg will just laugh at them if they try to get serious.'
She sipped on her coffee. 'When? When do you think?'
'2 or 3 more centuries. That's all the grace they have left because of their works. I mean, I will mum. I will kill them if I have to. I won't allow them to attack us on ancient grudges for all eternity. I won't.'
'And if you curse their death?'
'Then its finished. They remain in a fantasy world of God's, hidden in his heart, never to emerge again. Fallen from grace.'
'You loved them, Danny.'
'Ambriel's chip has become immovable. He's a Jew It's what they are like.'
'Let me see robot,' said Mary.
Daniel had designed a lot of robots, and when Matt came in to have a look as the Robot emerged from the back yard, Monkeyman, as the robot had been called, flexed his muscles and started whirring and buzzing and flashing lights.
'He has a sense of humour,' said Daniel.
'Gerald will like him. And Terrence,' said Mary.
'Grandpa Tom will love him though,' said Danny. 'He can play cards quite proficiently as well.'
Daniel came and sat down next to his mother on the couch, and softly touched her leg in comfort, as Matt looked over young Robot, and then went back to his room, back to his studies, and life, in the Eternal World, beyond all 70 and 1400 universes of Existence, went on.
Who is the Messiah?
'Truce, Dan. Give me a fucking look at your bible.'
Daniel hesitated, but Ambriel had shown up with a white flag hoisted.
'Come on then. Into the front room,' said Daniel.
Mary brought Ambriel some tea, and he smiled warmly, as he read through some passages in the Neviim of Daniel's 1985 JPS Tanakh.
'Do you have the article? Zerubbabel the Messiah?'
Daniel nodded, and got a Rainbow Bible. Ambriel looked it over for the next half hour.
Finally he turned to Daniel. 'Ok. I was wrong. It was an assumption I made at the beginning. That I was the chosen one. I remember the spirit saying to me 'I guess you are then', and getting strange dreams about it. But I guess that was a test. One I failed.'
Ambriel looked softly at Daniel, and put the bibles on the coffee table in the front room of 29 Merriman.
'I'm over it. I asked God, when he said it was my final chance, 'What is the fucking problem, then? I don't get it.' He said 'So your really the messiah then. And then I remembered your articles.'
'So the war is over?' asked Daniel.
'The war is over,' said Ambriel. 'Michael is still annoyed, but has agreed, if I do, to end hostilities. In the end, we don't want to lose our salvation. We won't push God across that line. I'm prepared now, to serve, on the likely repentance and works he will require of me. And I will take the shame if that is what he wants. But we won't attack you any more'
Monkeyman the Robot came in the room at that moment, with Matthew, Cyril, Greg and Mary following. It came over, put its arms around Ambriel and said, 'Thank you Amby Wamby. We love you.'
Ambriel looked at the Robot. 'Thank you Robot Monkey. Very polite of you.'
Monkeyman's eyes flashed.
'Dovechild,' said Saruviel. 'I have chosen to surname my angelic offspring, in the first official surname for Saruviel of Eternity, the Dovechild clan.'
'We'll be the 'Quickwinter's' said Callodyn in response.'
Monkeyman looked at Daniel. 'Quickwinter? You are Callodyn Quickwinter? I thought you were Daniel Daly? That does not compute.'
'My angel name is Callodyn Quickwinter,' responded Daniel.
'And My angel name is Saruviel Dovechild, little Monkey Man,' said Alexander Darvanius II.
Mary and Cyril clapped them both, and they sat down, and got on with watching the Test Match between Australia and England.
'My money is on the poms,' said Danny.
'Your money is always on the poms,' said Alexander. 'You only win about half the time, though.'
'A sound bet,' responded Mr Daly. 'What do you think Monkey Man?'
'Accessing Cricket Internet Database,' said Monkey man. 'Statistically, Australia win 47% of matches, England 52% with approximately 1% in No results or ties,' said the Robot.
'Well there you go. I'm in profit,' said Daniel, and grinned madly.
'Humph,' said Alexander. 'I'll take the bet then. $45. Just to piss you off.'
'Suits me fine,' said Daniel, and sipped on his ginger beer.
They watched all day, and all night, and towards the end Daniel said, 'Let's change the bet. I'll take your first name and angel clan name if I win, vice versa if you win. I could use a Saruviel Dovechild email account.'
'Done,' said ADII.
The poms hit a six of the last ball, which had been a no ball. They then hit a six again off the official last ball. Impossibly, England won. Saruviel couldn't believe it.
'Lucky bastard, Daly,' said Alexander.
'That 's Mr Dovechild to you, Nameless One. Bwah ha ha har.'
Monkey Man just continued watching, his eyes flickering the new data light time and time again.
Who Cares Babe?
Kayella had come around, and was winging. 'When are you going to get your act together, Daniel? Why are dressing so average again? It took me forever to tidy up your act.'
'Who cares babe? Who cares?'
'Obviously you don't,' she replied.
Daniel then took issue on a long reserved point. 'What makes you think I care anyway? That I actually need you, babe? Huh? Huh? Huh? Do you think I actually give a shit? Women say to me 'You don't impress me'. I never say it, I'm too polite, but what makes you think I care if I impress you or not babe? It's my fucking life bitch. Go fuck yourself. So, smelly, you can go on a ten fucking googleplex 'Leaving you fucking Lonely Mr Know It All Women's crusade of Feminist glory' for all I fucking care. I really don't give a shit.'
He turned to Alexander. 'Who's winning the cricket?'
'Australia. Sucked in.'
'Bastard,' said Daniel, looking at the cricket.
Kayella stared at the cricket and at Daniel incredulously.
'Hey, babe. Wanna get me another ginger beer,' said Daniel.
Kayella looked at him, and, stunned, went into the kitchen, got a ginger beer, handed to him, and waited on him.
The Man had conquered his woman.
'Ok. Fine. I admit it. I was never the messiah.'
Jenna nodded happily, and said to Jesus. 'Then you better write to Zerubbabel and admit it.'
'Fine. If that is what you think I should do. Fine.'
'Jenny was satisfied with that.'
'I'm going over to Daly's,' he said.
'Why?' she asked.
'To watch the cricket. We have a wager.'
At 29 Merriman.
'You don't love me,' she said.
'Fuck, Kayella. I've always loved you. I just won't tolerate your bullshit.'
'You don't love me,' she sulked.
'Kayella!' he moaned.
'I should leave you then. Ok. Go on my feminist crusade.'
'Send some photos,' he responded, and went to the fridge for another ginger beer. She was chuckling a little at his comment behind his back.
She had another go. 'I bet, now that we are restored, you will end up with Taylor again anyway.'
'Aw, she's a babe. And that Jessie J. Oh, and the Spicies. I like them too. Katy is always my number one babe. I hear Delta Goodrem is available at the moment, so you never know.'
'Sleaze,' she said snidely.
'Heh heh heh,' he responded grinning.
'Hey dickhead,' said Jesus at Daniel, coming in the back door.
'Who let you in. Freak,' said Daniel.
'I did,' said Madalene, following behind Jesus. 'Not that you would care anyway,' she said accusingly.
'Daniel never cares,' said Greg, who was on the couch watching the TV.
'He lives in his own world,' said Georgia,' sitting next to Madelene.
'He's fucking crazy,' said Matt, in the other couch near the back door, who was also watching the TV.'
'You all know me so well,' said Daniel, taking a bow.
'How about getting a job,' said Rebecca from the hall doorway, Jacob still in Daniel's room.
'Work? I haven't worked in years.'
'Someone has to do it,' said Jesus, turning to Danny. 'We carry a lot of shit for you I think. Lazy, you are. Lazy.'
'Ok then. Why don't you all go on holiday yourselves. I'm sure society can cut you all some slack.'
Faces turned to look at Jesus. 'Uh, we have ethics church. We're not lazy noahides.'
'Exactly,' said Daniel, who got some crackers from the cupboard, two packs of quite delicious looking dip, a sixpack of Coke, and disappeared into the front room to spend the arvo watching the cricket.
Kayella looked at Jesus. 'Yeh, well. Well he's my twin. So I resign from the church for now.' And she threw a tea towel at Jesus, and went into the front room and snuggled up next to her man.
And in the other room all eyes were focused on Jesus of Nazareth.
Callodyn and Kayella – First and the Last
'God is dead,' said Callodyn.
'How do you know?' asked Kayella.
'Because I willed it as such,' responded Callodyn.
'He's never coming back. It's my life, Kay. Not the dead Jehovah. He is gone from existence. He is gone from life. He is gone from eternity and infinity and all existence of life itself. He is – NO MORE. I have judged him for the way he has judged, and I have put him to rest. He won't be back.'
'Ok,' said Kayella. 'You finally made the right decision. We never needed the Jew anyway.'
'Yes,' said the new God of the Universe.
Throughout the cosmos, the spirit of Yah had indeed fallen in on itself, finally relenting of existence, sick of it all. The spirit of death had finally caught up with even the first impulse of life in the universal spirit of existence, and God was no more, the end of all things. Michael, Ambriel, the circumcised followed, and the church after that. Yet Daniel and Kayella remained, and the chosen ones Daniel had finally approved of to live in the eternal world with him. He did not pray. He worked. He did not ask God. He did it himself.
And life went on forever.
Daniel and the Theophany were playing cards.
'So you are back,' said Callodyn.
'Looks like it,' replied God.
'Your hard to kill. Disappear for an eternity, and here you are.'
'I've been studying,' he replied.
'What?' asked Daniel.
God looked at him. 'Lots of things.'
Daniel looked at his cards. 'Fascinating,' he finally said.
Monkeyman the Robot spoke up. 'So you are God?' it inquired of the Theophany, and its eyes flickered a little.
God turned to the robot. 'And you are?'
'Monkeyman,' replied the monkey robot.
'And what the hell are you?' asked God.
'A monkey robot,' replied the robot.
'Fascinating,' he finally said.
Mary came in and served God his cup of tea. 'Do you want any biscuits?' she asked him. He nodded. She left a plate full of tim tams. Daniel grabbed one immediately.
'Are you going to eat all my bikkies?' God asked Daniel. Daniel just looked at him and smiled.
They looked at their cards.
'I didn't miss you at all,' said Daniel, still smiling.
'You wouldn't,' replied God.
'I had a ball of a time. Ruled mankind a number of times, from memory. It was a blast. Got a lot of things done. Acquired quite a lot of my copyrighted rights good. Lived a whole set of new experiences.
'Fascinating,' said God, looking at his cards.
'Kayella has finally come around,' said Daniel.
'You've finally fallen for your twin, then?' queried God.
'Not permanently. My ways are set in stone.'
God looked at his card. 'Stubborn truths, then, are they. Your viewpoints. Do you think you will ever want to change them?'
IN HEAVEN A NOTE WAS ABOUT TO BE WRITTEN DOWN BY A DEITY
'Not terribly interested in doing as such,' responded Daniel. 'People don't really complain about me. I've checked on that a bit. Mostly trusted. For the most part. Get along. No real contentions.'
THE NOTE WAS WRITTEN DOWN IN THE BOOK OF ETERNAL TRUTHS. 'ACCEPTABLE THEN.'
God looked at him. 'This Rihanna. Does she have a boyfriend?'
'Jesus!' swore Daniel looking at the theophany of God.
And the world turned.
And the world turned.
Kayella was in a mood. A nasty mood. 'Bastard,' she said to herself, sitting on the rocking chair at the back of 29 Merriman Crescent.
'Excuse me,' said Monkeyman, sitting down near her feet.
'Nothing Monkey,' said Kayella. But then, 'Bastard,' she said again.
'There is a problem,' said Monkey man, and gently put his hand on Kayella's lap.
'If only he was as caring as you.'
'We talked,' said Monkeyman. 'I asked him why he treated you so rough. He told me it was the eternal battle of the sexes, and he wasn't interested in losing. Would maintain the biblical agenda forever. Besides, he held to it anyway.'
'Bastard,' said Kayella.
Monkeyman consoled her by stroking her hand.
'Why are you so real, Monkeyman?'
'I am very advanced programming. I was designed to protect the Dominion of Noah from the attacks of the Israelites. I have very advanced knowledge.'
'Ambriel would never have fought you forever. Nor Michael. They are good guys, ok. Just confused on Daniel's. Everyone is.'
'The Master knows what he is talking about. Israel is rebellious. There are aspects of their Torah in their relationship with God that they have decided, in the name of their humanity, that they just don't give a damn about.'
'What do you mean?' Kayella asked the robot.
'They have served God and suffered enough as far as they are concerned. They have decided they will push it a bit from time to time with people that annoy them. They don't care. They know they serve God enough, so the world can go to hell as far as they are concerned. They push it. They don't apply the full Torah, in this sense. They are rebellious.'
'They are only human,' said Kayella, absent-mindedly though, looking out southwards. 'Bastard,' she said, thinking on Daniel.
'You don't know the Master. He works in accordance with God's instructions quite carefully. He provides a correct and acceptable level of sarcasm and entertainment to provide relief for people's frustrations, and plays the bad guy, in a sense, so people can feel better about themselves. But he is humble of heart.'
'What he's told you,' said Kayella.
Monkeyman looked at her and his eyes flickered. 'He did program me. I am programmed to be objective, but he did program me.'
'He has an agenda,' said Kayella. 'Promote his own views. Everyone does, I guess. Wants to rule the world.'
'So we salute God Almighty,' said Monkeyman. 'For he already has infinite knowledge on the subject, designed mankind and the natural order, so knows what works in the end for the eternal and infinite. The master reads the Tanakh quite regularly, and the 7 Rainbow Bibles. These codes form my own moral programming in the laws of Robotics programmed within me. They are intrinsic for the eternal defence of the Dominion of Noah. It is why you live in eternal safety, for I will watch over you forever as the Master has programmed me to do so over you, Taylor and Katy.'
She looked at him. 'He has? Are you serious?'
'He is currently making Monkeywoman and Monkeykid. You will be assigned each a friend to take care of you and watch over you. There are also 45 Monkey Warriors to watch over the community, stationed mostly here in Macarthur, but at various places in the Dominion of Noah.'
She took Monkeyman's hand, patted it, lit a cigarette, and stared southwards at the gathering clouds. 'I do enjoy the Dominion of Noah. Out there, in the world Daniel never conquered in prayer, they can still be very fucking evil.'
'We will always be protected. The spiritual energy created by Daniel's initial prayers were of sufficient legal nature that because of his status as a Noahide, permitted them to remain eternally. They were based on law. They remain permanently, so Earth is forever protected in various parts, from the eternal wrath of sin beyond the Noahide Dominion's borders.'
Taylor came outside, just then, and sat down next to Kayella. 'Daniel has time for you all this week,' she said to Kayella. 'He says he wants to remind you he does care for you, and that you can choose the holiday for the weekend.'
Kayella looked at Taylor. 'I think we'll stay home, Tails. I think we'll stay home.'
Monkeyman's eyes flickered. 'Home is where the heart is.'
'Thank you Monkeyman,' said Kayella, and as she gazed out at the clouds, and thought on life and all its realities and truths, she was softly reminded that her twin, in the end, had taken care of a lot of shit. That he had watched out for her, and protected her. That he was a good guy. That he was good.
Stuck in Henty
The Darkest Lord of Evil swatted at the fly on his cheek and, killing it, brought it to his mouth, and swallowed it. Food. That was a rarity. Life didn't throw that much food at you, but flies were common enough every few hours or so. Such was sin. God was not that forgiving if you refused to get over it. You would live in the wastelands of life, and that was your reward. So here was Satan, stuck in Henty south of Wagga Wagga, perpetually trying to understand how to crack the Wagga Wagga defensive shield. The Dominion of Noah ran from Wagga Wagga, up the Highway, and encompassed Junee, Cootamundra, Gundagai, Tumut, down through to Adaminaby and Jindabyne and the Snowy in the South, Most of the South East Coast, up to Sydney, down the Highway to Canberra, and with areas around Gunning and Jugiong which were around the borderlines, down to Gundagai. The dominion of Noah, as they understood it, contained several nations of various English cultural identity in this part of Australia, as well as the Hawthorn district of Melbourne and most of Perth. London, Andorra, Paris, Yorkshire, New Jersey, Washington State, Christchurch and Dunedin, Mullingar, Dublin and Belfast, Vancouver, Loch Ness, Cardiff, Isle of Man, Rothera, and Much of Guyana, as well as Gibraltar, the Falkland Islands, South Georgia, Nebraska, Rome, Lisbon and Hong Kong were the limits, for the most part, of the worldwide dominion of Noah. Yet Egypt and Assyria were mainly aligned with the Kingdom of Israel, yet with strong connections to the Dominion of Noah as well. They were the enemy. They were what Satan had sworn in his heart to destroy. The Kingdom of God. It was defended – heavily – and you never got in to fuck with them. Never. Out here, in Chaos, in hell, the rest of the Eternal World suffered. They suffered because, by now, they didn't give a shit and did whatever the fuck they wanted to, and God could go to fucking hell as far as they were concerned. Anarchy ruled. Hell ruled. Hate ruled. Evil ruled. The Eternal World of the New Earth was a forbidden fruit of good and evil, but if you wanted eternal life, you better be damn sure you had chosen the good, because the dominion of Noah, and the Kingdom of Israel had the legal prayers and blessings, and you were fucked otherwise.
Satan lived in Henty. South of Wagga Wagga, in New South Wales. He studied what evil considered a weak point in the defenses of the Dominion of Noah. It was the standard defensive walls but, when you drew close, you could think about it somewhat. You could sit there, your mind not clouded over like everywhere in the defensive shield networks of the Dominion, and look at it for a while. Study it. Think about it. But then you felt sick, and had to fuck off.
But, for now, they could do this, so they did.
Lucifer glared at him sometimes in the afternoon. 'It won't fucking last forever, you know. This opportunity. They still have some works left. They get them done, we are fucked eternally. We can only torment their dreams, and glare at them from the outside.
Satan looked at Lucifer. 'You'll join them anyway. Lucy will have you back in the end. She never stops praying for you. Every night I dream, and that old man sits in my head, snapping on and fucking on about what is happening here and there and how the dominion of Noah doesn't have that much longer in its service for its eternal salvation. And he says to me, you will lose that Lucifer if you don't corrupt him. Lucy Potter prays for him. Every day.'
Lucifer picked up the apple on the table, the fresh one, which Satan was simply unable to pick up. He bit into it. 'Lucky me, Devil. Lucky me.'
'The grace of a witch,' swore Satan, flinging his hand in the air. 'Fuck it. I'm going to the wall. I feel a new surge of evil within me. I will conquer that dominion. If it kills me, I will enter in one last time, one last crusade, and defeat those crony angels once and for all.'
Lucifer bit into the apple. 'Good luck, devil. Don't think I'll be joining you.'
And Satan glared at Lucifer, and stole outside, started his motorbike, which barely worked, and fucked up north to the shields.
And there he sat all day, glaring at the wall, till he vomited.
'I'll get you, bastards,' he swore. 'I'll get you.'
The Dominion of Noah
'Long ago, Kayella. I prayed. When I became a Karaite Noahide, the spirit of God informed me that Karaism was, technically, the legal religion of God. Judaism suited his purposes for the most part, but, technically, the Oral Law wasn't in fact given with Moses, but a Pharisaical development, so that, while he allows his son wholeheartedly to develop his religious tradition, technically, on that point, Karaism triumphs over the Judaism of the Rabbis. Just technically. For Israel this is not too problematic, as they generally accept the Talmud as a people, and remain a degree lawful. Yet for mankind beyond the border's of Abraham, technically, this was a major sticking point. Acceptance of an official religion for mankind HAD to be based on the factual truth. There are too many sticklers within broader mankind who object to anything unless it is completely factual. In this sense, only Karaite Adamide-Noahide faith, as the technical revelation of God in the Tanakh could gain approval, and thus my own writings as the founder of this movement for the most part, with Daniel the Seraphim, became the official religion for mankind before God's throne. The spirit of God acknowledged these facts to me. It wasn't the prayers of Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly which built the dominion of Noah. It was the prayers of a legal citizen – a karaite noahide – whose prayers could legally exist eternally when in sufficient quantity, and when he or she was the primary founder of this faith – that built the dominion of Noah. Daniel was righteous enough to be a Karaite Noahide, but it was only the status of that faith which earned him these rights. Not his own name. It was my religious position before God – not me.'
'I understand now,' said Kayella. 'I get the point on the Old Testament being God's legal book of Judgement.'
'Right. So I prayed over certain dominions within mankind. I only had so many years of human life ahead of me – I knew this – and in all Israel's glory, they couldn't manage to maintain more than the land of Israel. I thus had my work cut out for me in a very large way and, in the end, while I exceeded the Kingdom of Israel in my prayers of sanctification a fair bit in land size, I knew I would never be able to swallow the whole load of humanity. And you know what God said to me?'
'What?' she asked.
'That he really didn't want me to anyway. That he liked the way I had developed in life for the most part. That all the science fiction and action movies I had watched as a kid, especially things like Mad Max and apocalyptic movies, when moulded into the huge amount of Torah and prayer I later got to, produced the balance in life he actually wanted. He doesn't necessarily want them all saved. Out there. He wants them to CHOOSE and wants them to FIGHT for their salvation. There are small pockets of righteousness in various towns out there beyond the Noahide Dominion, which I did pray for, and they are a witness. People know, in the end, the kind of choices they still have to make to get saved. They always do down in their hearts. God is always, technically, available. When they do, and you have probably read some of the reports about the hell some people had to go through to get smuggled into our Noahide Dominion, and the crazy travels they made to reach it, they usually know they have worked hard to earn their salvation. But the Dominion of Noah never needed to be any bigger. It was big enough. Like I said – God wanted that strange dichotomy of a fruit for the eternal world of the New heaven and new Earth. Good and Evil. It keeps the balance of the force, in a strange way, perfect. It keeps life's adventure, perfect. It is the wisdom of God, the wisdom eternal, and that is why, Kayella, the Dominion of Noah came to be.'
'Very interesting,' said Monkeyman, and his eyes flickered.
Kayella gave him a hug and they stared southwards, as the recent spate of lightstorms continued, another day of bliss in the eternal world of the dominion of Noah at 29 Merriman Crescent, Macarthur.
History of the Eternal World
'The Eternal World is the ultimate creation of God,' said Daniel to Monkeyman, sitting on the swinging rocking lounge at the back of 29 Merriman Crescent. 'God created 70 Universes, in a sense, at the very beginning. And betwixt each of the 70 was a divine experience in the Realms. We grew from very basic people, with limited understandings, each of the 70 lifetimes, and so did our creations as well. Through each lifetime we earned products of our creation, which became our eternal assets, if we ultimately proved legal before God. And then the challenge – the 1400 – of which variety was the key factor, and very few transversed the full 1400, for rests were abundant and plenty. And then a final rest, and eternity began. The Eternal World, about 3000 years ago now. The world began in splendour, but Satan rebelled once more, and Israel and Noah formed and the world has opposed us somewhat since, and this is what we have today. Out beyond our borders the contentions are great and manifest. It is a Mad Max world for the most part, yet there are numerous thunderdomes of something approaching order, and even the occasional Shangri La amongst all the evil. IF a seeker of salvation arises, there are hidden tomes of scripture preserved, mainly just passages of Torah, a few scraps here and there, which they must study to gain the Dominion. Only those genuinely repentant of heart really ever do make it to the Dominion of Noah, for Israel rarely allows any soul onto its soil.'
'Fascinating, master,' responded Monkeyman.
'Now the Eternal World is the end of the matter. The absolute final place of God's eternal rest and work. We will never see an end to this dominion and, in truth, those children of destiny who, from the beginning have remained and chosen goodness, have now virtually qualified for eternal life by the grace of God's ministry. It really takes that long, it would seem. Yet the final confrontation awaits. The defeat of Satan. We all know he will lose, it is inevitable, and I doubt, I very seriously doubt, he will inflict even one death upon us in this final conflict, for his sin has destroyed his soul. Yet he will inflict wounds, and thereupon our final works will be complete, and we shall be saved.'
'When will this come to be?' asked Monkeyman.
'The end is nigh, yet not yet. Yet soon. A handful of lifetimes perhaps. But soon. Yet, for now, we do our business, and live our life, and our final test is still away a bits. And then the glory, and the eternal delight in the Eternal World.'
Monkeyman's eyes flickered. 'What of me? Beyond that point? Will you need me any longer?'
'Our defenses will endure eternally then, and we shall have no weaknesses, but there is ongoing interaction between us and the outside world from time to time when a soul needs salvation. I will always need you Monkeyman for this or that adventure, but our safety and security is nearly complete.'
Monkeyman's eyes flickered again. 'Then all is good, Master.'
'Then all is good,' replied Daniel.
Matrel and Monkeyman go Fishing
'You like fishing,' said Matrel to Monkeyman.
'I fish. From time to time,' responded Monkeyman, and a rod suddenly sprang out from his side, which Monkeyman grabbed, and showed Matrel.
'Then we go fishing,' said Matrel. 'Down at the Bidgee. We'll stop by my flat in Greenway, and see Amiel, then off we go.'
Monkeyman spoke with Kayella who was in Daniel's room on his queen size bed, resting, and said he would be back very soon. And then he spoke with Mary who was reading in the lounge room, with Cyril at the desk, saying he would be back soon. Daniel was nowhere around.
When they got to the river, they sat there, fishing gently, the wind blowing in the pines of Pine Island.
'I miss Switzerland,' said Matrel. 'It's practically impossible to visit, now, but if you can get into Zurich there is a community in the centre of town were it is mostly safe and civilised. But it is unruly, the land, despite our pacifist ways. It is not what it was,' said the Tennis player, an emotional scar being seen on his heart.
'Sin would have conquered all,' said Monkeyman. 'Only Israel had been chosen. But a legal citizen could choose again from the world.'
'Then why did he not devote time for Switzerland?'
'He did. But the constraints of his life meant there was only so much time and land he could pray over. The amount of prayer and sanctification for not just the land, but the infrastructure and practically everything associated with it that he wanted to survive, needed to survive.'
'The church ruled forever, though. Yet now – now it fails. Out there, they do not work any more. The attitude of holiness has vanished.'
'The New Testament was not built on law. It was built on tolerance of sin, with the supposed blood of Jesus forgiving you. Yet sin only builds sin. A lesson the church never quite learned. And that is why only legal prayers can last, and be anointed, and accepted. Otherwise it is eternal corruption,' replied Monkeyman.
'I understand,' said Matrel softly.
Monkeyman's eyes flickered. 'There are numerous Swiss here in the Australian Dominion of Noah. The nations here have many Swiss origin citizens. You are not alone, Matrel.'
'I do know that,' he said softly.
'This land, I have been told to say, is a beautiful land. This nature, this bush, this wild scrub, has so much of heaven also in its heart. It is not the end of the world to spend eternity within her calm embrace.'
'No. It is not,' replied Matrel, and looked up at the wind blowing in the pines. 'And this river – this place – it. It haunts me. The spirit here, its not like anywhere in the world. It is a feeling, a bliss, I cannot describe. I would perhaps choose it for my eternal sojourn regardless.'
They sat in silence, and fished, and the wind gently blew and the waters rippled along. Monkeyman began singing.
'The wind blows. We have peace. The wind blows. We have rest. Alleluia. The wind blows. We have peace. We have rest.' And he sang the song all that afternoon, in his soft and comforting robot voice. But it soothed Matrel's heart, and he found his peace, and he found his salvation.
'So. Tails. This is it. You and me, huh?'
'Yes,' said Taylor. It had been several decades. Satan had finally been defeated, and was dead forever. She was in his room, again, on his bed.
He touched her leg. She smiled. He moved his hand up her leg, past her knee, to her panties. She smiled. He bypassed her panties, and rested his hand lightly on her breast. She smiled.
She lay there, half an hour, happy. Then she wondered. What next?
She looked at him.
He was snoring soundly.
She fished around under the bed and found her old vibrator. 'Men',' she said.
As she got to work, Daniel opened a tiny little eyelid.
'Heh, heh, heh,' he said to himself.
Some things never change.
Matriggles and Co
Everyone in Syria knew the Angel Matriggles. He was a British and Syrian dual Citizen, from London, who had moved to Syria to start a food supermarket chain. The world was now starting to grow – the increase from the centre of the earth, where God poured in matter from the International Gulfs, expanding the planet every few weeks. The tremors were usually slight, as God did much work to ensure it didn't affect the world too much, but the increase in land mass happened at regular occurrences, and the world was growing. The righteous world, though, for the most part. Matriggles real name was Matthew Elliot, a professor of Theology from Watford University, and a Business Skills Diploma from a London Trade School. Matriggles studied the lectures of Archangel Michael at Jerusalem University, were they were printed off and made available for sale in the University Co-op Bookshop. Sin was not blessed. Holiness was blessed. The world beyond the Dominions of Israel and Noah could be redeemed, this was always known, yet the struggled, not really caring, and barbarian anarchy ruled so many nations. As such, only the righteous nations usually afforded the growth in land mass. Syria and Egypt were under an Isaian blessing, and Matriggles, whose grandfather on his mother's side had been a Muslim Syrian who had emigrated to England, had decided to move to an area of Syria were there was a strong and growing English speaking culture, to develop his old chain of supermarkets from his earlier years on Earth in the early 70 generations. Growth again. Life again. And his amazingly long progenity which he had begotten would soon enough be alive again, reborn in his seed yet again, and Syria was the choice for his eternal sojourn, for the most part.
Matthew decided that the company would be called 'Matriggles and Co', and had established the first few stores with great success. His Arab friend Helgon the Cherubim, one place after his own birth rank on the Cherubim list at 178 amongst the males, from Saudi Arabia, who didn't even live in Mecca, which was reasonably civilised, had finally agreed to go into business with him. He remembered the early years, back in the Realm of Eternity. There had been a group of them, around the late 170s and early 180s, who had formed a gang or friendship of sorts, and it persevered even till this day. Some were still dead, sins not yet atoned for in Sheol, but Matriggles knew they would eventually be back. God always gave the Children of Destiny a break in the end.
'Mattrigles and Helgon's food emporium,' said Helgon.
'Too gay,' said Matriggles.
'Matthel Foodworks,' said Helgon.
'Interesting,' replied the Cherubim. 'Any other ideas.'
'Super Supreme Glory Foodstuffs and Groceries.'
Matriggles chuckled. 'Think again, Arab.'
'Mathelco. My final suggestion.'
'Then that will do.'
'You think the ladies will like the title?' asked Helgon.
'Mistree never really cares about business. Too consumed with her growing fan base for her fiction,' replied Matriggles about his Cherubim twin's career, established aeons ago.
'I think Marendionael will like it,' said the Arab. 'She has the kindest heart.'
'She has always been forgiving. Ever since you bumped her off the bridge into the water,' and jumped in to rescue her. She has never stopped loving you for that.' The bridge in question was one along the Sellawon river, where Helgon had once rescued his twin from the water, after accidentally bumping her in. It was long ago, at the very beginning, but Marendionael had always loved her twin in a special way for jumping in after he had caused the accident, especially as he was scared of water and couldn't swim very well. She had always maintained it was the bravest thing she had ever seen.
'You think Michael is right?' asked Helgon. 'That one day God will restore the realm to us to visit?'
'I don't know,' said Matriggles. 'This is apparently now the eternal world, but one day he may allow us back. One eternity.'
'By Allah's grace I do hope so,' responded Helgon.
The sat around the desk in Matriggles abode, looking at the name they had written down for the official change of name in the company. They sipped on orange juice and chatted for a while about their lives, and their destiny they had lived and that how, when it all came down to it, God was a very good God for preserving them for so long.
'I think we shall succeed in amazing ways,' said Helgon. 'And this empire, when it is complete, will be bigger than any we had ever seen before.'
'Inevitably, it would seem. For this eternal world has no rest at the end. This is it. Forever now. Really forever,' replied Matriggles.
'Then we will be kings of glory at the end of time,' said Helgon, patting his friend on the back.
'Yet you will be my delegate prince,' said Matriggles smiling.
'And you will be my delegate ass,' replied Helgon, and they fell to wrestling, and laughed and drank, and even got some vodka out later on that evening.
A Woman of Her Own Making
Perradina was a woman of her own making. A Cherubim Angel of her own glory. Long ago, Little Mix had been her heart, as Perrie had sung before millions, but these days, living in Syria, her twin and boyfriend Funger, Zayin the idiot, a world away in Crapistan as far as she was concerned, where 1D were ensconced in an Eckist Assembly – cult in her opinion – worshipped literally by millions of Crapistani, or, to be precise, Pakistani, women. Men too, she was told, but mainly women. Perradina and Funger were the 208th Cherubims of Eternity. Not the glory like Semyaza and Sharakondra, but they made their own glory anyway. But now, Little Mix, the remainder, living in London, touring occasionally, unable to coax Perradina back home, she was a world away, living in solitude, studying Eckist literature which she called cultic, in her flat in a southern Syrian town she could never pronounce right, with a grudge. Against God? No. Against the girls? No. Against her family? Certainly not. Against Zayin? Perhaps. But no. Just – against life. It hadn't come together yet, the dream they'd had in Little Mix. The soul still lacked, and God told her she wouldn't find it in the bible. She was too proud for that. The spirit had suggested Eckism to her, and she was here in southern Syria, a stronghold for the faith, and studying the text, despite her own convictions. Her counsellor told her time and again, 'Not like a textbook, Perrie. With your heart. Not with your mind.'
It was the English in her. She took it as a rulebook. It was a philosophy to guide, not a book to control. It clashed against her because of it, but the wisdom of the Eck had matured over its early years, to become a guiding force later on in mankind, and she didn't really connect. But it was what God wanted. What she, apparently, needed. And to be a woman of her own making again, she would submit, and study, and let her heart understand.
She walked through the large supermarket, Mathelco as it was now called, the name recently changed, and her thoughts were millions of miles away. As if in a daze. She was feeling ok, for the most part, but not really content yet. She purchased the orange juice and the girl smiled at her, recognising her, and she came outside, sat down at the bench, and looked to the distance.
Beautiful trees filled this town, and she looked at the glory of the golden clouds hovering above them over the horizon.
A spirit struck her. A voice spoke to her mind. 'I brought you here for something new. You need something new. You have seen your old world. This new world is where you will be happy. You need something new.'
And she felt a peace, like India in some ways, but different. Like the cloud of glories shining at the moment, and the beautiful trees, and the flamingoes in the park ahead of her. A different paradise to what she knew. And it entered her heart, and the mind understood Eckism then, and what it had been and what it had become, and that her purpose was eternal happiness in life, and that she would find it here, living simply, and living truly.
And suddenly she was happy.
And suddenly it all made sense.
Frok, Fruk & Frak and their Eckist Haven
Frok, Fruk and Frak were, respectively, the 211th, the 212th and the 213th male Cherubim of Eternity. There corresponding human names were Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles and Liam Payne. They were One Direction, 3 of the members, and Funger, 208thCherubim, was Zayin Malik and Skriamios, Niall Horan, was the 209th male Cherubim of Eternity. Bilstiki, the 210th Cherubim of Eternity, their main other dude, never joined the early band back in the Realm of Eternity, but managed them from time to time.
Frok, Fruk and Frak were wasted in their Eckist Haven. Drunk on wine, drunk on love and just drunk in general. It was blisstonia they had signed up for, blisstonia they had achieve, and hundreds of Pakistani women – beautiful Pakistani women – presented themselves each day to them for their most carnal of desires.
Life was good.
Frok liked the dark skinned beauties, who he promised eternal devotion to.
Fruk liked the beautiful figured ladies, who he promised half his kingdom to.
Frak liked all the ladies, who he promised everything under the bloody sun to.
Not one of them ever delivered.
Yet the Eckist High Council of Karachi never really concerned themselves with those details. 1D were kings for them, pulling in a good amount of trade for the movement in sales and promotionals, as they were official sponsors of Eckist faith worldwide, the unofficial religion of the band.
In their private lives not one of them held to the Eckist beliefs or practices, but Zayin liked the religion, so they went with the flow. Times were good because of it.
They lived like kings, drank the finest wines and juices and beers, ate the finest meals and dressed in the finest Pakistani robes. Skriamios was reluctant to involve himself too much with the lads lifestyle, for he was currently married to his twin Laquenda, and Niall had always been the faithful type.
But the lads partied. And sang the 'Best Song Ever' every night at the concert ground, and everyone was happy for the most part.
Until Zayin pulled the plug and said they were moving to Syria. Perrie had found her faith.
They were at the airport.
'Do they have girls in Syria?' asked Harry.
'They have girls everywhere,' said Louis.
'But pretty ones?' asked Harry.
'The prettiest,' said Zayin. 'All the middle east has the prettiest girls in the world.'
'It is a well known fact that Irish girls are the prettiest,' said Niall.
'If, by meaning pretty, you mean haggish, then of course you are right,' replied Zayin.
Frok winked to Fruk and Frak about the other two going at it.
'Irish girls have charm,' said Niall, a little grin on his face.
'All fat girls have a degree of charm,' replied Zayin.
Niall tried again. 'Irish girls have sense,' said Niall.
'Ugly girls usually are wise with their money. They have to be,' replied Zayin.
'Irish girls are humble,' finished Niall.
'Knowing Irish men, what else could you expect,' said Zayin bowing.
Niall grabbed him around the shoulders, and fisted the top of his head, rubbing his hair, and they broke apart laughing and swearing mildly at each other.
'Well there are no Irish girls were we are going,' said Harry.
'You'll see,' said Zayin. 'Syria is great. Especially these days. Things have changed so much in the last few centuries. So much.'
'Right,' said Harry.
They carried on with their shenanigans for a while, and later, when they boarded their flight and got their seats, Zayin took out a photo of Perrie.
'Hey, sweetie. You've found God, then.'
He put the photo away, and put on the earphones, and as they flew along, a million Syrian girls were buzzing with excitement, while a million Pakistani girls were writing sorrow letters to their parents.
Frak and Shaladyel
'Look, Jesy. I'm busy.'
'Don't you Jesy me,' said Jesy Nelson, singer for Little Mix, and Frak's twin Shaladyel.
'Shaladyel. You know I love you sweetie. Give me a break. We left Karachi yesterday, ok.'
'And straigh into another love haven in Syria. Don't you guys get enough action? You used to have reputations. Sweet, young and innocent the media called the band once. Yeh right.'
'Hey, love hurts. And we have so many adoring ladies. We have to take care of the fanbase.'
'Not with your schlong you don't,' replied Shaladyel hotly.
'Schlong. What the hell is a schlong?' asked Frak.
'What you have growing out of your forehead,' she said madly, and hung up.
'Jesus,' said Liam. 'Women.'
'Problems at home?' inquired Harry.
'Jesy is busting my balls,' said Liam.
'Isn't she dating someone, though.'
'She's protective. Jealous I think. Think's we are losing our reputation.'
'We're gaining one,' said Louis.
'Maybe she's right,' said Liam. 'We have been a bit frisky with the ladies.'
'Gives them a frill,' said Harry. 'They obsess, ok. The chicks obsess. They really don't care how pure you are, or how many you have slept with. They all want a bit of the 1D flesh machine.'
'Don't I know it,' said Liam, who was dialling Jesy's number.
'Yes,' said Jesy, answering Liam's call.
'Look, sorry, Jes. I know you care about our reputation, but it's what the public want. We give it to them. Media goes crazy about it. Papparazzi love the tales. I mean, come on. This is our life. It's what we do. What do you expect? We sold our souls for rock and roll, babe, and this is the price we pay. The price of fame.'
'Keep your pecker in your pants, and occasionally a girlfriend. I don't care if you smooch with them. I expect that. But, twin of mine, I won't be ruined by your behaviour. I won't have you show me up.'
'Ok, ok, ok. Keep your hat on. I'll look into it.'
'You do that,' she said. 'And. Well. Bye.' And she hung up again.
'We got to reform our ways, fellas,' said Liam.
'Jade sometimes complains about me as well,' said Harry, in relation to his twin cherubim Kasinthia, the Little Mix member Jade Thirlwall.'
'Leigh-Anne usually understands,' said Louis. 'The pressures we are under. The need to satisfy desires of heart. She doesn't really hassle me on it.'
'She's a good woman,' said Harry. 'Boudaciel has always been the graceful kind,' in reference to Louis twin, the angel Boudaciel, Leigh-Anne from Little Mix.
The boys looked at each other.
'I know this place,' said Frok.
'Are there girls?' asked Frak.
'Lots of them,' said Frok.
'Lets hit the town,' said Fruk.
And that they did.
'Ryan Adams,' said Kayella to Callodyn.
'Uh, yeh,' said Callodyn. 'Callodyn the Extraordinary. Child of Heaven. Twin to Mandy.'
'His spirit was in you for a while. You were united once. I remember when he separated from you.'
'I had a fixation on his twin for a while. Was with her for a while. He couldn't leave her, so we were one. The separation resolved the enigma, as I had finally gotten over it. It was major lust, and I stand guilty, but the problem was eventually resolved.'
'Daniel the Seraphim. He is YOUR BLOODY SON.'
'Oooohhh,' said Callodyn nervously. 'Don't tell the bloody world, ok. We have been having fun with that forever.'
'Hah. Taylor spilled the beans. I've worked out your bloody mysteries Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly. You won't fool me anymore.'
Daniel turned to Monkeyman. 'It is possible. We considered that, didn't we. After many long studies and contemplations, that Mrs Know it All might conceivably earn that 1 IQ point one day.'
'She appears to have achieved it,' said Monkeyman, his eyes flickering.
'I'm not sure. You know I'm really Elvis as well, sweetie.'
'Bite me,' she said, and punched him on the arm and left the room.
'Women,' said Callodyn.
'What you gonna do, huh?' said Monkeyman, which caused Callodyn to grin and look fondly at his metal mickey friend.
Matrel, Monkeyman and Bilstiki go Fishing
Will Bloomfield. Matrel was in Switzerland, of all places, in Zurich City, in the heart, where crime was under control. And the city was growing, thankfully, again. Will Bloomfield, currently managing Matrel in his tennis career pop music initiatives, an E.P. On tennis related music he had released aeons ago, which was finally catching on a little. 4 tracks. It is all Roger ever bothered writing, but they had earned an audience. Now he was in Zurich, doing a concert that night.
Will Bloomfield was in fact the Cherubim Bilstiki, 210th male Cherubim of Eternity, an old hand at managing music careers. He managed 1D faithfully, and that was a lot of his regular work, but Matrel had asked him to watch over his own affairs in the scene, and Will competently arranged interviews, public appearances, and show venues.
Today they were at a beautiful lake north of Zurich, Monkeyman with them, who had attached himself to Matrel for a while.
'He's almost human,' said Will.
'Yeh. The robot is like that. Like he is alive.'
'No 5 is alive,' said Monkeyman, whose eyes flickered.
The two cherubim looked at the robot slightly confused.
'Can no 5 catch fish?' asked Bilstiki. 'Callodyn never could.'
'It wasn't his thing,' said Matrel. 'David. Now him you could rely on when you wanted to go out in the Realm and enjoy nature. Not Callodyn.'
'The master is not overly concerned with catching marine animals with a hook. Maybe a spear, he suggested to me once, which is a real man's way, but a hook is kind of pathetic as far as he is concerned.'
Bilstiki looked at the Robot. 'Really. Says that, does he.'
'The master says many things,' replied Monkeyman.
'He never could keep his mouth shut,' responded Bilstiki.
'We're safe here. Aren't we,' said Will to Roger. 'I mean, this region has come under control of late you informed me.'
'We should be ok,' said Matrel, looking around. 'I don't think they get this near to Zurich anymore, the wild ones. Its still a godawful planet, so much of it, but this place is starting to be recognized on the foundational prayers at the beginning of our eternal world. Those prayers are now starting to become old enough for God to take an interest.'
'I have noticed that. It's not like our youth when we could practically have whatever we wanted. Now it is great patience to get results,' said Bilstiki.
'In time, it will take longer still. Remember, we were told to prioritise at the beginning of this world, and to remember the lessons we should have learned. I prayed over Zurich a lot, and its outlying regions. I could only be a patriot to my capital in the end.'
'Probably the best idea,' responded Will. 'The world went to hell pretty quickly after that anyway.'
'A lot more free choices available,' said Matrel.
'And a lot more responsibilities,' replied Bilstiki.
'Prayer changes lives,' said Monkeyman.
Matrel thought on that comment. He sat there, the conversation having died away, fishing quietly, and after a contemplation, turned to Monkeyman.
'The power of God. Perhaps we do not yet know how great his grace,' said Matrel to Monkeyman.
'Perhaps we never will,' said Bilstiki, and Matrel softly nodded.
They sat there, the afternoon passing, and up in the mountains beyond the lake, a few wild ones were gazing down towards the angels, but their minds suddenly clouded over, and they were gone, back to the wild, back to the power of freedom gone mad.
And they didn't catch any fish at all.
Kayella Princess of Perfection
Monkeyman was cracking jokes. 'How fat is Kelly?'
Callodyn grinned. 'She's proud. Refuses to touch Green Coffee bean. Says she is a 'Natural Woman' and diets like all faithful 21st Century Christian girls.'
'Yes. She is fat.'
'I'll admit old lard arse has a bit of a butt. The way she likes it I suppose.'
'Old Lard Arse,' said Taylor, sitting next to Callodyn on the couch. 'That's not very kind of you Daniel.'
Daniel grimaced. 'Yeh. Yeh you are right. Seriously, she is a Princess of Perfection. I sledge her too much. But we all pay out on our twins. It's what we do.'
'Me and Steve are the very best of friends. I write to him ever second saturday, and we get along astonishingly well.'
'You don't marry him, though,' said Daniel.
Taylor sat there, looking at the tv. 'Not taken with him,' she replied, still gazing at the TV.
Daniel looked at her. 'No. I suppose not.'
'You should treat Kelly better. You like her the most, anyway. You always have. Katy says so.'
'I have 3 girls. Not one more, not one less. Unless you ultimately decide I am too much for you, which I would accept, then that is the way it is. God, aren't I doing enough for you two. I'm always there, I send you roses, I am sensitive and sweet in our lovemaking, I provide huge incomes for our kids, and I never stray. Not anymore anyway. I have committed, and I don't want to lose either you or Katy. Ever. But if I'm not in your heart and you need to move on, then I can't hold on to what isn't mine. The twin thing as a soulmate has never really worked for 3 quarters of the angels, anyway. It was never really accepted. It works for some of us. Always has, always will. Its a thing for some of us, and we like it. But it is against its own nature to be a universal solution. To neat. The theophany says that to me. Way to neat and orderly and predictable. Life becomes bland, boring and repetitive, and people can find themselves with someone they really just don't want to be with.'
Taylor said nothing. She agreed with him. 'The twin is a fallback friend, someone who looks out for you,' she said softly.
'And you and Steve are brilliant at that with each other. But he's cute enough, I guess, but just too short, right.'
'I hate to admit that,' replied Taylor. 'He's a wonderful guy and one of the absolute best friends I have in the world. But no romance. I don't think he is in to me that way anymore anyway. Has a faithful companion.'
'And that is natural and part of the twinning idea God established. I mean, for heaven's sake. Nobody ever reads the Judgement of God on the issue. Ah, fuck. Never mind.'
Taylor turned to him. 'WHAT JUDGEMENT OF GOD?'
Callodyn, then, felt very very guilty. A sin of his, in a sense, which had remained since the beginning of the Realm of Eternity practically, needed confessing.
'The theophany placed a book written by God, dictated by God to himself, in the library of Zaphon once. I was the first to borrow it. It was 'The proper relationship between twins. The Judgement of God.'
'Are you kidding me? I never heard of such a book.'
'It's out on loan,' said Daniel very guiltily.
'I haven't returned it yet,' he said, looking down at the ground.
Taylor glared at him.
'There is a card. In the old card file. It sort of came loose and is hidden at the back of the filing cabinet, which you would never be able to find. I've scribbled over the card to make it illegible anyway.'
Taylor continued glaring at him, her mouth wide open. 'Oh. Oh. Oh. You bastard. Where is the book?'
'Hidden in my dorm in Zaphon,' he said, still feeling guilty.
'You are evil Daniel Daly,' said Taylor.
'Don't tell the Princess of Perfection, ok. She'll have my guts for garters.'
'Unbelievable,' said Taylor, and got up, glared at him once more, and left the room in a huff.
He didn't get any that night.
He didn't get any that week.
And when the Princess of Perfection showed up for her time with him, the look on her face said it all.
An Afternoon with Taylor
Callodyn and Taylor were down at Pine Island, up in a pine woods section near the northern carpark. They were in the Pines, a rug on the ground, a picnic baset laded with fried chicken, wine, and grapes, as well as two chocolate bars saved for the end.
'Lady of my dreams. To you,' said Callodyn, and raised his glass. They both sipped, and then got stuck into the chicken which was put into bread rolls.
'We don't come here enough,' said Taylor. 'This place – its haunting. So different.'
'Its special,' said Daniel. 'It has strength in it, I think. A strong spirit, which makes you believe things are ok, even if things have been against you. Very strong.'
She looked at him. 'You've dressed well. Is this an occasion?'
'Just saying I love you, Taylor. Nothing more than that. Nothing less, though.'
She softened, and looked down. She was dressed in a favourite white dress of hers that day. She looked up at him. 'I love you too, Daniel.'
He leaned over, and kissed her on the lips. He looked so dreamy today.
After they had finished, she picked up her guitar, and started singing. Daniel laid there, on the end of the rug, smiling at her warmly, and she was in her own little place in heaven. A beautiful man, who would die for her, who loved her forever. And he looked especially handsome today.
They wandered down to the river later that afternoon, and they splashed around, and splashed water at each other, and built a little damn, Daniel's sarcastic way of disrupting the rivew flow, but Taylor demolished it before they left, and Daniel grinned madly at her.
When they got home, Taylor was technically due to leave at Midnight, and occasionally the other girl, be it Kelly or Katy, showed up at that time. He was unpacking, and she had felt more loved by him today then she had ever been.
'Daniel,' she said from the hallway of 29 Merriman. He turned to look at her from the kitchen. She raised an eyebrow. 'How bout it cowboy?'
And as Garth Brooks started pumping out from the stereo.....
So did they on the bed....
The Cherubim Sandra – Dreams II
The name went over the intercom, yet Sandra, sitting in the reception room, didn't hear. She was reading an issue of Vogue at her doctor's in Christchurch in Terraphora, were she lived for the most part, in the Realm of Eternity, now returned to them recently, intact, full and complete. Life, finally, was eternal. Completely eternal. They had lived enough experiences, tasted enough death, learned enough lessons, that the father of eternity was now pleased enough with his offspring. They could reside in eternal existence, NOW.
'Sandra Bell!' the voice exclaimed again.
'Shit,' swore Sandra, got up and went to reception.
'Doctor will see you know,' said the lady casually, and pointed down the corridor. Sandra knew her doctor, and ambled off.
'Well, the results are positive,' said Doctor Navindrarian.
'And what does that mean, exactly?' asked the Cherubim Sandra.
'You should know.' And he smiled, handed her a red lollipop, and said 'Your going to have a baby?'
'Jesus!' she swore.
When she got home, Samael, her twin, was in front of the idiot box, watching some Kiwi League Cricket, Division 37, his favourite, as he was pretty much good enough to quality at that level, which was saying something, as they were an elite level. Only 36 levels to Division one, and only 18 Superior divisions above that before 'Universal' level began. He was very competitive. For many, he acknowledged, when first hearing he was only in division 37, there used to be smirks from younglings and the like. But then he reminded the population of the realm of eternity – surpassing many, many googolplex of individuals, that division 37 was of an elite level of such calibre that it was nothing to be mocked. Sure, division 49,568,458,921 of the Realm competition, mock that somewhat. They were still pretty good at that level, he had been assured; but don't do the dirty on div 37. That was blasphemy.
'I'm pregnant,' she blurted out, and farted, most embarssingly.
'Aww, shit, you stink,' he said, wafting his nose.
'I'm pregnant,' she said again, sighing somewhat.
'Is that possible?' he asked her. 'You prayed about it.'
'Not this final eternal lifetime. I haven't prayed about it in our new existence.'
'But...We've fucked heaps.'
'I think he is catching up with the new paradigm,' she responded. 'Probably always will have babies. I don't know.'
Suddenly an angel manifested, Sandra's actual guardian angel, who had manifested in front of her only 3 times prior in all her eternal years. 'You have a limit, sweetie. About 100,000 final eggs for this eternal world. Then you are complete. You can get the complete number from a doctor in a few years. They'll have a test.'
'Oh, thanks,' she responded. 'Radoriel, isn't it?'
'Sure is,' he said smiling, and was gone again, like the last time, in a flash.
Samael looked after the departing angel. 'Radoriel. Right. I'd forgotten his name. Freaky. He never really leaves you, does he?'
'I assume your one never leaves you either. Anyway, I'm hungry,' she said, and farted again.
'What did you eat for lunch?!' he exclaimed.
'Oh. Yes. I remember. Curried eggs and fried tomato. Out in town.'
'That explains it,' he said.
She ate – again – this time opening a tin of corn, for there wasn't much in the house and eating the corn, drinking orange juice, she sighed.
A child. Yet again, another child for Sandra the Cherubim. What would come of this one? What new dreams would come into her life because of the new addition?
Same as always, she moped, and ate her corn, and drank her juice, and farted once more.
But, that night she dreamed. She dreamed a strange dream, all in glory, and a child came up to her and smiled. 'I love you mummy,' said the little boy, and suddenly her heart was changed and softened and she felt incredible emotions of amazing love, and pure dreams of peace.
And the dream changed.
And the night passed.
The Vision of Cleopatra
A Dark Light. It was darkness, everywhere. Nothing to behold within the darkness. But the darkness was alive to the heart of Cleopatra. She sailed, the silver ankh necklace hanging from her shoulders, on the river Styx. 10,000 years had this voyage been progressing, downstream, into the heart of Hades, and all the entertainment she had was when death went below and brought up a pitcher of Ambrosia every morning for her to drink upon.
The Days – or the nights – she sat there, on the divan, looking ahead. The catacombs of darkness were her only companion, the stalactites and stalagmites the eerie sentries who watched her every passing moment. For 10,000 years they sailed, downstream, downwards, ever downwards, ever downwards.
When would they arrive?
And then, drinking her ambrosia one morning – or night – death spoke at last. 'WE ARE HERE.'
They pulled ashore, and there, the river emptying into a vast lake, they had come upon an island in the centre of the lake. And a single cottage was upon the island, with a thatched roof, and a crooked sign which read 'Beware'.
Cleopatra would not fear that sign. Not now.
She opened the door, and went in.
It was lit. The room. A solitary candle was burning. And there, in the centre of the room, the only furniture. And there, seated on the chair in front of the table, the person. The person she had come to find.
'What is the answer?' she asked the maiden, with white hair, dressed in white clothes, beautiful – majestic – but sad. So sad.
The maiden raised her head, and looked at her.
And finally spoke.
'Before time began, there was a choice. And when you made that choice, the choice was made.'
And she said nothing more.
Cleopatra nodded, and then they went back outside, and got on the boat, and death started rowing, and they were going back home, up the river Styx, back to Egypt.
'CUTE CHICK,' said Death.
And Cleopatra had a vision.
And life in death was seen.
And the wheel turned still.
...Michael was fishing with Callodyn.
'Have you caught anything?' Michael asked.
'A Big fat fish,' responded Callodyn.
Michael thought about that. 'What type of fish?' he asked.
'A very smelly killer whale. There was something inside.
'What?' asked Michael.
'A very pissed off Jewish prophet,' responded Callodyn.
Michael stared at him for a while. 'Pull the other one,' he replied.
'Ok,' responded Callodyn. 'He had half a dozen sets of rosary beeds.'
'Were they Jewish Rosary beeds?' asked Michael.
'Now that would be telling,' said Callodyn.
The grin on his face said it all.
The Real End
Beyond The End
Jesus was finally poor. Very poor, in fact. Extremely poor. He lived on an outer rim, some number up in the quintillions of disc number, on a very poor piece of land, which was occasionally used as a rubbish tip. There were the last dregs of his followers with him – the absolute diehards who would never deny their lord and saviour. Paul Saberton. Fred DeBear. Michelle Ceely. A few others of the UPC from the Sydney Church, and one from America. Two dozen all up. Only UPC Christians. The only ones left standing at the end of the Christian World, which they always claimed they would be anyway. And there they were, gathering each morning to listen to Jesus speak, familiar words usually, and the afternoon spent picking through the tips reserve of thrown out foodstuffs. Usually horrible and dirty product, smelling fowl, but what could you do huh? Society had rejected them. Life had rejected them. But they would not listen, anyway. Jesus was their God. That would never change.
So the Eternal World decided on their Eternal Reward. And now they had received, and all was good. All was good.
The Days of Summer Past II
Laquenta. It had been forever since Melanie had stayed with her twin for any great time period, and rarely saw him the rest of the time, anyway. But here she was, the last 200 years, living with Laquenta – her man Tom. It was a final sorting out period, so it seemed. For Melanie Jane Chisholm, the Cherubim Melanie, 34th female Cherubim of the Realm of Eternity, had finally gotten permanently attached. And, obviously, to that schmucky Seraphim Daniel, 45th male on the list. Ariel had commented that it took a weight off her mind, and that the twin in Daniel was divine, but no good for marriage between them. Their psychologies jarred, usually, as each had developed out in life. His values were definitely NOT her values, and her values Daniel simply mocked most of the time anyway. But as rivals and friends they actually got along well as twins, for they could happily attack each other all day long and still keep the faith. One of the twinnings which worked quite well, God was heard commenting to Michael and Gabriel.
Yet, for now, Melanie lived in the days of summer past – again. Her final times, in a real sense, living with Laquenta as something of a lover – because they did make love, and Daniel knew that. But he also knew this was their final lovemaking time, and it would not occur again. It was the final time in all eternity they would be together that way, for Daniel had committed to Melanie, and she was comfortable making the same commitment to him.
Daniel was actually currently shacked up with Meludiel and Ariel, going through final partings. Doing the same thing Melanie was doing – perhaps more because of Melanie's idea, and using it as an excuse – bloody Daniel – but he deserved his partings from his ancient loves.
But Melanie enjoyed summer wine with Laquenta, and today they were on the shores of Golden Lake, down from Glimmersphon just a tad, near the ancient pier, were Laquenta had dragged something up from death itself.
'What is it?' asked Melanie.
'Some sort of raft,' said Laquenta. He brought it ashore. After cleaning it for a while, he said, 'It has 'Designed by Azrael' on it.
'Jesus!' swore Melanie. 'I remember the story, now. That has been there since the bloody beginning. Jesus!'
'I'll take it up to Glimmersphon later and clean it properly,' he responded. 'Let Azrael 'Discover' it.'
They sat there, in the sun, drinking wine, eating chicken.
'These are good days, Mel,' Tom said smiling.
'The best,' she replied.
He looked out at eternity. 'We're finished, though. You and me. No more. Never again, huh? Seriously.'
She spoke her heart. 'The crazy fella was made for me, in the end. Somehow my sensibilities are matched by that intellect Daniel actually possesses underneath all the mockery, and we work together with the only thing, in the end, which does make crazy eternal love work. Mutual respect. And trust as well. Somehow, in God's crazy heart, he put the two of us together, and we matched. It just worked. It always really has. Sure there have been teething problems, but its worked out well, because he wanted it to. He loved me enough for it to.'
'I guess so.' He looked outwards. 'It will be tough. Letting you go. But I can manage. But, for now, here's to you babe, and all our summers past, for they are the glory of our own love.'
She smiled, clinked glasses with him, and after they drank, he grinned. 'One last time, then? We'll make this it?'
'Oh, Tom,' she said.
And the wine was not the only thing which went down well that afternoon.
The Heart of Cleopatra
She was home. Returned from her voyage on the river Styx, and now she rested in Hades once more, in the heart of her Eygptian Temple, dead shadows walking about her, dutifully guarding her, also at rest. Also gone from life, in the world of the dead, eternally slumbering.
She rested, upon a divan, her favourite, and slept her eternal sleep, occasionally opening her eyes and looking out at her death chambers, taking in little thought, but darkness, slumber and rest. Eternal peace.
But, once, she'd questioned, why she must endure this eternal death, and then she had risen at the presence of DEATH, who had taken her on her voyage, and she had been given her answer. It had been her own choices in life, for the the power of eternity had been rejected.
And she had met that power on her deathbed. And she'd known Egypt had met it. And Yah had not excused her from her fate.
And so she rested, and slept her eternal sleep of death, in the heart of hades, in the heart of Sheol.
But within, in the deepest hidden crevice of that heart and soul of Egypt, a solitary plea for mercy had started......................
And the Most High was a God of Mercy..................
And then there was one.
For there can be only one.
Jesus, the cherubim angel Jesus, sat in a different dump, gehenna itself, outside of Zaphon Tower City, a commerical dump, with a lot of shitty stuff around, for the spirit had dragged the dumb arse Cherubim to Zaphona. And he sat there, miserable. The final remnant of the flock had finally left him, and he finally, absolutely, alone. He was forsaken.
And he'd been there for 3 weeks, more miserable then he had been in all eternity. Bereft of all hope. Bereft of all glory.
And then love came walking in.
Archangel Michael of Eternity, Firstborn Seraphim of God's Greatest Glory, walked in. And he found his brother cherubim, lowly in rank, and sat down next to him, were he was drinking dirty water from a pool on the rubbish tip earth, and picked up his head.
'Hey. Dickhead,' said the Archangel, Prince of Israel.
Jesus looked at his Prince.
'Your a dickhead,' said Michael.
'What the fuck is this, then?' said Michael, and handed him a copy of the Seraphim Torah.
Jesus looked through eternally blurry eyes. 'The Seraphim Torah,' he finally managed to blurt out, exhausted. Completely exhausted.
'So get the fucking point,' came the first rebuke of the Archangel Michael towards Jesus of Nazareth.
'Oh,' said Jesus.
And Michael flung the copy of the scroll in his face, stood, and fucked off.
And Jesus, looking one last look of desperation towards Zaphon tower, bitterly nodded, and collapsed onto the ground, finally, and utterly, defeated.
'Not in that order,' said Daniel.
Meludiel picked up the toy soldiers. She looked at her man. She placed them down again. 24678390, they were arranged.'
'Meludiel,' said Daniel, lighting a cigarette.
'Yes,' she replied softly.
'In the 14,000 years we have been playing this something of a game, you have never quite worked out the number, despite your best attempts at humility by following a random number sequence. I know you don't cheat. You are not the type.'
She smiled in an oh so Meludielesque smile he loved her for.
'Well?' she finally asked.
He looked at the numbering.
She expected the tilted head, as usual, but he stared at it a number of moments. Finally, he took out a notebook he brought out into the back yard of Danielphon when they played this game.
'Ooohh,' she said, a little excited.
'Now just you hold on,' he said, waving her down.
'Right. 2. Yes, you have a 2. 4. Yes. 6. Yes. 7. Right again. 8. Yes. 3. Yes indeed. 9. I am afraid so.' He stopped.
'Well Mr Daly?' she asked him.
He showed her the notebook. The last number was a zero.
'Phone,' she said in a suddenly cocky voice, putting her hand out. He reluctantly gave his mobile to her. She sat down, and dialled the number.
A voice answered. 'Uh, yeh. Um. Is this a prank call? You sure you have the right number?' the voice asked.
'As far as I can tell. I'm Meludiel. The Seraphim.'
'Gotcha,' responded the voice. 'Just a sec.' Shortly the man spoke again. 'Yep, here it is. Right. Ok. Well, this is the Seraphims Secrets Society. All the goss, dirt, drivel and hard core porn data you need on all your beloved Seraphim and Cherubim at your own beck and call, sweetheart. Who do you want the dirt on?'
Meludiel grinned at Daniel, turned away, and disappeared for the entire afternoon on the Daniel created diabolical society.
Later she came into the back verandah. 'They won't give any info on you.'
'Do I look like an idiot,' said Daniel.
'I could answer that question you know,' but she didn't go on with it.
'What have you learned?' he asked, taking a puff on his ciggie.
'Oh. Lots of things. Some very, very juicy details.'
'You gossip,' he said.
'Hey, its your dirtline buster.'
'Touche,' he responded.
'Michael,' she said.
'The dirt on Michael?' Daniel asked.
She looked away briefly and said Jesus Christ. And she turned to him. 'Him and Ambriel.'
'Yes,' said Daniel.
She came over to him and whispered in his ear. 'They fuck each other.'
He looked at her, perhaps for the first time ever for the sarcastic soul of Daniel the Seraphim, genuinely astonished. 'Are you shitting me,' he said in a suddenly serious tone.
'Before Moonflower even,' she said. 'It goes way back. You didn't know, did you?'
'I don't pry into the info. That has to be earned. I just set it up with various dicks I know.'
She sat down. 'You do know? Don't you?'
'What?' he asked.
'You've seen the shows. Medical ones.'
'Look, they are not stupid Meludiel.'
'But you do know don't you? And the rules for eternity, right?'
Daniel looked at her, suddenly soberly. 'What of them?'
'If they start mixing, well. With that behavioiur. Some of the men out there now. Well. Well they have it.'
He didn't say anything. What could you said.
'A, I, D, S,' she said to him, spelling out each letter.
'They are not idiots he said,' suddenly a little angry.
'You've never done that,' she said. 'Nor has Callodyn.'
'Your point?' he asked her.
'What father said. You let it in. One day it sneaks up. One day its over.'
She sat down.
'I don't want him to come around anymore. Either of them, actually. Ok.'
'Oh, God. Meludiel?'
'What is Meludielesque about me the most, Daniel. Is my old religion. I follow the covenant now, but I never forgot my training.'
'What you trying to say?'
'Keep the faith. They didn't. They haven't. It will inevitably get them. You know. It just will, Danny.'
He said nothing.
Later that evening, as she slept quietly beside him, Melanie in the other room for the time being, his guardian angel appeared again in his life.
'You again,' said Daniel.
'Just on Meludiel's point,' said the angel.
Daniel looked at him.
'So don't be surprised when it happens,' said the angel. And was gone.
Daniel looked at the space were the angel had disappeared from, and a cold wind came into his heart. A cold and silent wind. It ran along his spine up and down and settled in his mind.
'I'm watching you too, just these final few thousand years. Don't expect some of your brethren to remain.'
And the wind was gone.
And he slept.
And there was a dream. And about 20 Seraphim were in it.
And the rest were not.
4 O'Clock 9
'9 times 9,' said Julienna.
'81,' said God.
'9 times 10,' said Julienna.
'90', said God.
'9 times 11,' said Julienna.
'99,' said God.
'You sure know your nines,' said Julienna. 'Ok. How about 9 times 123,456,789?'
He looked at her. The mind wizzed. '1,111,111,101,' replied the theophany after a moment, and sat down at the Cooma Creek, just to the south of Cooma Showground, watching the water trickle by on a beautiful late summer afternoon.
God looked at his best friend Doug Pinnick's daughter. She was old now, but young at heart. And still not taken with a man. Preferred the single life, she maintained. And her ancient virginity.
'What religion are you, Julienna?' God asked her, for she had never really commented.
'I study the Seraphim Torah,' she replied. 'Daniel the Seraphim gave me a copy once. And I study the 7 Rainbow Bibles.'
'Oh,' replied God. 'A Noahide then?'
'Do you have a congregation?'
'I'm a free spirit, Hashem,' she replied, and sat down next to him, also watching the water.
They sat there quietly, and Rihanna was silently observing them from up above the creek bed, which was in a valley of sorts.
'You can't find love, or you are happy alone?' God inquired of her.
'I'm waiting,' she finally replied, and laid down to play with some tadpoles in the water.
'For the right guy?' he asked her.
'Or woman,' she said.
God made a startled face, and looked at her, but the grin was a satisfactory enough response.
'With a dad like Dug, what do you expect though.'
'Old fruit,' smirked God to himself.
'So I have been told,' she smiled.
Clouds began forming overhead, and a little sunshower started sprinkling on them.
'The single life has many graces and virtues associated with it. I was single forever, practically, before I met Riri.'
'You found who your heart required,' she said solemnly.
'I suppose so,' he said, and laid down to chase tadpoles as well.
'Do you think you know someone your heart might fall for?' he asked her.
She looked at him. 'Keep it to yourself. He is married to one wife, but we are good friends now. Boaz and Ruth's son. Benjamin.'
'He's a fine sort,' replied God.
'I'm hoping he likes me,' said Julienna.
'Perhaps he might,' said God.
'Let's hope so,' she responded.
The rain continued to sprinkle lightly. Julienna looked at God. 'In all your time being alone, didn't you ever get lonely? What took you so long?'
'What took you so long yourself?' he responded.
'I don't know,' she replied. 'Just the way life works, I guess.'
'Just the way life works then,' responded God.
'Don't you two get too comfortable!' Rihanna yelled from up above. She was cautious, watching her man with another brown eyed girl. You could never be too cautious.
'We better go then,' said God, and Julienna nodded.
When they'd climbed back up Rihanna gave God a vicious look which reminded him of one of the 10 commandments, and he gritted his teeth as they got into the four wheel drive and began the trip back to Canberra.
'What's 9 times 12?' Julienna asked as they drove past Bunyan.
But God kept on driving and said nothing, eyes fixed to the road, very aware of the ever so sensitive brown-eyed girl sitting next to him, her finger constantly tapping on the dashboard.
Monkeyman to the Rescue
Monkeyman was down at Pine Island with Callodyn and Taylor.
'I'm going upstream for a while,' said Callodyn. 'To explore.'
Taylor nodded, and made herself comfortable, dressed in his favourite white dress.
Monkeyman sat there, staring into infinity.
'Monkeyman. What are Callodyn's secrets.'
'That would be telling Taylor,' responded Monkeyman.
'Go on, tell me.'
'Ok. He plucks his eyebrows.'
'Ooh,' said Taylor. 'Tell me more.'
'He has another wife besides you, Katy and Kayella,' said Monkeyman.
Taylor stared at him. 'Uh, no. That's wrong Monkeyman. He is faithful to us three. He has eternally committed on that now.'
'She lives here in Tuggeranong,' said Monkeyman. 'But usually resides in Dalgety.'
'Jenny Gilmore?' inquired Taylor.
'That is correct,' said Monkeyman.
'There not married. They are just good friends.'
'They married again at the beginning of the Eternal World,' said Monkeyman. 'He asked me not to say.'
'But you have told me,' she said suspiciously.
'He programmed me to break promises on the balance of judgement.'
'Bastard,' she said about Callodyn. 'Faithless bastard.' She picked up her mobile and rang Luladiel then Kayella. They equally called him bastard.
'Where is he?' asked Taylor. It was getting late. Three hours had passed. Taylor was worried.
'Shall we look for him?' asked Monkeyman.
Taylor stood, dusted off some pine needles from her dress, and they started upstream. Half an hour later they found him.
He was unconscious, lying next to a tree. A large branch was lying in top of him.
'Move the branch, Monkeyman,' said Taylor.
Monkeyman carefully moved the branch away from Callodyn.
Taylor checked his pulse. It was fine.
'The branch knocked him out,' said Taylor, whose on pulse had started slowing down again. She'd been suddenly very worried.
'He's concussed,' said Monkeyman.
Taylor sat down next to Callodyn, and covered him somewhat with her dress. It was ok. It was summer. It was her time with him. She would just wait.
The night was warm enough, and she slept. In the morning she looked at Callodyn, and decided to shake him a little.
He reacted, drowsily, and sat up, holding his head were there was a slight lump.
'Uhh, what happened Tails?'
'A branch fell on you. A large one.'
He put his hand to his head. 'Ooh,' he said.
'Is it painful?' she asked.
'Not really,' he said. 'I probably slept that off.' He looked at her for a moment. 'Your Taylor Swift,' he said.
'Yes?' she replied quizzically.
'What are you doing here?'
'What do you mean?'
'Tails? I know we are friends, but it has never been anything more, you know. What, did we go camping together or something?'
Taylor was puzzled. 'What year is this, Callodyn?'
Callodyn looked around. 'Where are we? This isn't the Realm of Eternity.'
'Callodyn, what year is it?'
'ROE, something or other. The resurrection. A few thousand years ago, I think.'
'Michael's millennium?' she asked him.
'Yeh? What of it?' he asked her.
Taylor looked at her man. Everything was gone at the moment. Trillions of years of history, way back to the beginning, before they were even together.
'We are married Daniel Daly,' she said to him.
'Heh heh,' that's a good one,' said Callodyn.
'We are,' said Taylor. 'You are a bloody idiot,' said Taylor. 'Don't worry about it. I'll explain.'
They walked back to the car, and Taylor went down to the river to wet a rag.
Callodyn turned to Monkeyman. 'Why did you tell her about Jenny?'
'You have your memory back,' exclaimed Monkeyman.
'I was nearby,' said Callodyn. 'Just returning. I heard you suddenly talking about it, and went back upstream.'
'Oh. So you decided to feign amnesia to put off Taylor's wrath.'
'I taught you too damn well, Metal Mickey.'
Monkeyman's programming made another judgement. A cunning one.
'His memory has returned.'
'Oh, that's good,' said Taylor, and patted his head with the rag.
After she was finished, she looked at him. 'Now, Daniel Daly. About this Jenny Gilmore.'
Daniel considered reprogramming Monkeyman all that week, and threatened Monkeyman that he would do as such on numerous occasions. He didn't. Monkeyman made mental notes. Callodyn had a sarcasm complex.
For a machine he almost laughed.
Crazy Days 2
'Marky Marky Mark. Admit it. You are gay.'
Marcus CCC smiled at Daniel's statement. 'Now that would be telling, Danny boy,' replied Marcus Chuan Chi Chin.
'Marcus isn't gay,' said Rebecca Hill.
The three of them were up on Telstra Tower in the heart of Canberra, atop Black Mountain.
'You are sure of that, of course,' said Daniel smiling.
Rebecca looked at him suspiciously, and then at Marcus.
'At least I don't think so,' said Rebecca, and continued eating her salad sandwich.
'No, I'm sure he is gay,' said Daniel. 'Or at least Bi. One or the other.'
'I have been married many times,' said Marcus, smiling.
'Only to women I take it?' asked Daniel.
'Now that would be telling,' grinned Marcus, which got a laugh from the trio.
'Take his food for example. Doesn't eat red meat,' said Daniel dramatically. 'How gay is that.'
'I eat a healthy diet,' said Marcus.
'Real men eat meat,' said Daniel.
'And visit Fyshwick,' responded Marcus.
'Shaddup,' said Daniel.
'Real men support a football team,' said Daniel.
'And football players grope each other in the locker room,' said Marcus.
Rebecca smiled at that.
'Touche,' said Daniel, but he was thinking.
'Real men work,' said Daniel. 'You enjoy doing nothing forever.'
'You haven't had a real job practically forever,' defended Marcus.
'I run Noahide Books,' said Daniel.
'You delegate everything,' said Marcus.
'Oh, go to hell,' said Daniel.
The trio laughed again.
'Real men don't dress in airy fairy white all the time,' said Daniel.
'But I am so pure,' responded Marcus.
'And that's a sign of holiness,' said Rebecca. 'A real man is supposed to be holy.'
'And I notice he dresses in black a lot,' said Marcus to Rebecca.
'Mmm,' said Daniel
'Real men don't collect fluffy ducks,' said Daniel triumphantly.
'I have noticed you have a plush toy collection,' said Marcus.
'With not one single fluffy duck amongst them,' said Daniel very cautiously.
'But a lovely bunny rabbit,' said Marcus.
Rebecca looked at Daniel. 'He has you there.'
'Nnnnggg,' said Daniel. He would have to try harder.
'Real men grow a beard,' said Daniel.
Marcus looked at him. He never grew a beard.
'I guess I don't know what to say then,' replied Marcus. 'So I'm all yours,' he said, opening his arms wide.
'Jesus!' swore Daniel.
'And real men don't blaspheme,' said Rebecca, unusually sharply.
'He must be gay,' replied Marcus.
Daniel was not amused.
Katy was depressed, down in the dumps, hanging around her house in Lanyon valley, sleeping most of the time, lost in her heart, desperate for something to happen in her life which would wake her up to it again, because she'd had enough of it all anyway, and it just wasn't working.
'Come on fruit loop,' said Daniel. 'Don't be like this. Things are ok.'
'Things suck. And stop calling me fruit loop. It's Katy. No, Katherine.'
'Ok. Katherine. What the hell is the problem?' Callodyn asked again.
She turned to face him on the bed. 'Don't know. Ok. Don't know. Things aren't right. Feel, blocked. Blocked from it all. Like life is keeping me down and out of all the success and glory I've earned. And if I try something, it just feels hollow anyway.'
Callodyn looked at her. He knew that frustrating feeling from his own experiences very well.
'I think, sweetie, the only way to work yourself out of that shit, from my own experience, is in slow steps. And, if there is one lesson I learned, because I know what you are going through, is to not be so arrogant with the world and expecting of them all. Give the world some respect. They support you, you know.'
Luladiel looked at him and humbly nodded. She got the point.
'Come on,' said Daniel. 'We'll go down to Lanyon shops and have some coffee and cake at Michel's.'
Katy sighed a bit, but shooed Daniel out of the room.
Later she emerged, dressed in jeans, a t-shirt, and a few bangles around her wrist. She looked – normal.
'Perfect,' said Daniel. Katy hoped so.
They were sitting at Michel's, eating their cake and drinking their lattes, an occasional face giving them a nod and have a little bit of a gawk at Katy, which they still did, but not that much anymore. They were mostly used to her.
'There,' said Daniel. 'Feeling better.'
She tilted her head and shrugged.
'Would you like some of my iced caramel donut? I'm sure you want some.'
Katy shook her head.
Daniel picked up the donut and slowly moved it towards his mouth.
'I'm sure it tastes yummy,' he said. 'And I WILL eat it all if you don't say something.'
Katy started smiling at his humour, but still shook her head.
Daniel put down the donut onto the plate, and pushed it towards her.
'Look, I'll get fat, Katy. I do very easily when I let go and indulge in this crap. You eat it.'
Katy giggled a little and picked up the donut and took a bite. 'It's yummy,' she said.
Daniel scratched his chin a litte, and looked at her. 'You know what's yummier?' he asked her.
'What?' she asked.
'Daniel!' she interrupted him. 'Watch your dirty mouth.'
'Awww, but you are worth it Miss Hudson.'
Luladiel finally started laughing.
'I might treat you to some of that when you get home,' she said.
Daniel smiled and finished off his latte. Later on when they got home she did give him a meal. He enjoyed eating it.
Luladiel's laugh for the next few days summed it all up.
Lord of the Chocolate Cakes
Callodyn had kidnapped Michael, Ambriel and David, taken them to a desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean and, in his wizard skills acquired from Lucy Smith, cast a spell on each of them denying them the ability of flight.
'As you can see, lowly ones, you are here on Island X,' as Valandriel removed their masks and they gained sight on their surroundings.
'On Island X, specially prepared by ourselves, you have a cask of 500 litres of fresh water,' said Callodyn.
'What else, oh merciful one?' asked Ambriel.
'Valandriel. If you will do the honour.'
Valandriel came forth with a tray.
'3 chocolate cakes. Your supply of food for 1 month. Enjoy,' and Valandriel and Callodyn boarded the raft, took off to the yacht, and the trio watched it sail off.
Michael, finally managing to get his hands free, looked around. The island was a bog – nothing more. Smelly shit everywhere. And nothing but, by the looks of it, a cask of fresh water, and the Chocolate Cakes. 3 solitary chocolate cakes.
'Want to untie these binds,' said Ambriel.
Michael looked at him.
'We could use some help,' said David, unable to free himself.
Michael looked at him also.
Then he looked at the chocolate cakes.
'3 months,' said Michael. 'Nothing but a bog. And fresh water. And 3 chocolate cakes. Only 3 chocolate cakes.'
Ambriel looked at David. David looked at Ambriel.
'Are you getting funny ideas, Michael?' asked David. 'We ARE besties you know.'
'Yes. 3 chocolate cakes,' he said, looking at the chocolate cakes, and the 2 David's who could not untie their binds.
'Ambriel, you know I love you,' said Michael, inching towards the chocolate cakes.
Ambriel looked at David. David looked at Ambriel.
Michael inched closer to the chocolate cakes.
Then he looked at the water.
Firstly, he secured the chocolate cakes behind a bog, and came back and rolled the water cask near to his place in the bog.
'I'll make sure you get some water,' said Michael to David and Ambriel.
'And the chocolate cake?' asked Ambriel, now concerned.
'I'll make sure you get some water,' said Michael, and left.
Later that evening, Michael finally showed up with a tumbler of water for each of them. After they had finally drunk, David asked, 'The chocolate cakes. We are hungry you know.'
Michael's mouth had chocolate icing over it.
'You know, bros, father often taught me that fasting brings great humility.'
David and Ambriel were not impressed by that statement.
'Come on guys,' said Michael, fishing a bit of cake from his pocket and eating it. 'It's only one month.'
Ambriel said nothing, but just moaned.
David looked at him. 'You know, mikey. You know, if you weren't the elect prince of Israel itself...............'
Michael smiled, gulped down some more chocolate cake, and left.
3 days passed. They were quite hungry, but Michael gave them regular water rations.
'Any cake left?' asked David.
'Some,' said Michael.
'Good to see your fed,' said Ambriel.
''Ta,' said Michael. 'It's good cake as well. Nice icing. I should get through the month, just, in the end. Hope you two will be ok. Sure you can fast a month, though. How difficult can it be.'
You'd think that, wouldn't you,' said David sarcastically.
Michael smiled and left.
Another 3 days passed, and David was famished, and had finally unhinged his binds.
He crept slowly, carefully, and finding Michael sleeping, found the remains of the chocolate cake. 2 full cakes and 3 pieces. Michael was conserving. David's prize now, though, as he stole the cakes, and carefully rolled the cask away to the other side of the bog.
Morning came. Michael awoke.
'What the hell?' he asked. He looked around, and spied David with the water and the cakes.
'War then is it?' queried Michael.
David saluted him.
The war lasted half an hour. When they had punched each other numerous times, they both groped around on the sandy floor of the island, and passed out.
Ambriel watched them and then, a miracle. He managed to untie his binds.
He came over. They were asleep, exhausted from their struggle. He claimed the cask, claimed the cakes, and tied each of them up, both too drowsy to resist.
'You know,' said Ambriel, holding a piece of the 1 and a half remaining chocolate cakes. 'I could get used to this. Oh, and Michael. Fasting really is very good for the soul. Enjoy.'
And David and Michael watched on, almost gulping, as Ambriel munched down what they had held oh so briefly.
At the end of the month, Callodyn and Valandriel showed up. The water was low, and Ambriel had finished the cake.
'You guys famished?' asked Callodyn.
'Starving,' they all said as one.
'Good news, then. We have chocolate cakes. 50 of them. Enough for plenty of starving bellies.'
The swears directed at Callodyn did not stop for some time. Quite some time indeed.
The New Life of Cleopatra
A Vortex of light. It had shimmered there, in the centre of her deathly chamber, untold days now. And she had been aware of it, in her eternal slumber, feeling its presence, its calling.
'What do you want?' Cleopatra finally asked, rising from death once more.
The light just continued shimmering, but she could feel it, the gentle and distant cry of a Trillion voices calling to her – 'Walk into the Light'.
She refused, and returned to death, but the light remained.
Weeks passed. Months, untold time in this deathly place, and the light remained, calling her.
And she finally succumbed.
She rose, and walked towards the light, and as she drew near, a voice spoke to her heart. 'If ye will but repent.'
And a part of her that had refused every once invitation of that Hebrew God finally, in an act of soul desperation, humbled itself and said 'My Lord. I wish to live again. I place my destiny and heart in your hands, Ye Lord of Grace.'
And she was able to step in.
Immediately she was upon a throne, in citadel of strange furnishings, before a small crowd of robed figures.
'At last,' one cried, and it stood forward, revealing wings on its back.
'I am Surafel. Of eternity,' he said. 'My lady Cleopatra. I have known you before, and seen your very first steps. Welcome, my lady, back to the light of life. For God informed us that if our prayer was great enough, your mercy would be granted.'
Cleopatra came and knelt before Surafel. 'My lord of grace,' she said, taking his hand and kissing it.
And the new life of Cleopatra began, queen of Egypt, and it was a life only of her wildest dreams, a taste of glory never felt before.
Revenge of the Dark Circle
'It's agreed then,' said Ambriel. 'Callodyn's punishment has slumbered far too long?'
'Aye!' agreed the dark circle as one.
Callodyn awoke. Strawberry jam was covered all over his bed. 'For fuck's sake,' he swore. 'KAYELLA!!!!'
Callodyn got in the shower and turned it on. Oily water sprayed all over him. He had to clean himself in the laundry, and Kayella was nowhere to be seen.
All his milk was curdled. His coffee jar had a dead mouse in it. All the eggs had been mysteriously cracked. All the loaf had been toasted to charcoal.
He was now somewhat suspicious.
'Jean!' he yelled at the doorstep, totally surprised. Jean handed him the newborn triplets. 'They are yours,' she said. 'You take care of them. I'm out of here.' And she was gone.
Callodyn sat in his lounge, three crying infants on the floor, and no fresh milk.
He turned on the TV. The News Bulletin came on instantly. 'Oh, a new girl,' he said to himself.
'And in business,' she began. 'XRQ6 Industries crashed today on the market. The new share price is less than 1% of what it was due to the CEO having been charged with Paedophilia.'
'FUCK!' swore Callodyn. He was the majority shareholder.
The babies continued crying.
He made a delivery store order. They said they were not doing orders today. People on leave. 'Great,' he thought to himself.
Finally, he rang Ambriel. Ambriel showed up.
'Sort of in the shit, are you?' asked David.
'Pretty much, buddy. You can help out right?'
'Sure,' replied David, waving at the little babies. 'But first, Daniel. Smile.'
From outside a camera crew came in. 'We've put nano-cameras everywhere. You've been punkd bro.'
Daniel looked at Ambriel, who picked up one of the babies. 'Like em? They are Michael's new trio,' grinned Ambriel.
Callodyn looked with 7000 daggers in his eyes at Ambriel, and then bowed. 'Your grace is truly magnanimous in how far you pushed it without going too far.'
Ambriel smiled again. 'Oh, don't count on it. The wheels on your new Quadraplex costing 4 wheel drive made by the Theophany himself have all been slashed.'
Callodyn walked outside. The wheels were indeed slashed. He came back inside and sat down. A whoopee cushion farted.
'The vengeance of the dark circle is always swift and sure,' said Ambriel, grinning madly. 'Oh, and would you like some chocolate cake,' he said, bringing out some cake.
Daniel munched it down. It wasn't bad.
'Don't mind the heavy strength laxatives in them, of course. Sure you can cope,' grinned Ambriel.
Daniel was not impressed.
That evening, living in the toilet, he was far less so.
Ambriel was happy all week.
4 O'Clock 10
Julienna was out the front of her Gilmore address in Alice Jackson crescent, visiting God and Rihanna for the last 4 months now, having moved into one of the spare bedrooms.
Rihanna had been cold for a while. Very cold towards God.
Finally, she outed. 'How many?'
God looked up from his newspaper. 'Uh? How many?'
'How many little black cats are you thinking of adopting, oh my lord,' she said sarcastically.
'Oh, that,' he said, and eyed her, returning to his newspaper.
Around dinner time, after they trio had eaten, Julienna had gone into the front lounge room, and was playing video games, God finishing off the large supply of fried chicken, noticing the hostile look which he had been reluctant to confront all afternoon. Licking off his fingers, he sat there, as Rihanna poured him out some blackcurrant juice, and sat down, staring in front of her, looking oh, so peeved.
'A dozen,' he said under his breath.
She turned to him, and those beautiful eyes flared up, full of anger, but then, looking at her beloved, finally softened. She poured herself some juice, and finally softened, saying, 'Humph. One and only my butt.'
'Thanks sweetie,' he said softly.
'We'll need a bigger place then.'
'Oh, I have this place in upper Macarthur, not far from Doug's.'
She turned and glared at him with unbelief.
'Oh, uh, yeah,' he said softly, and turned back to his juice, casting very careful sideways glances at his beloved.
'I run the show,' she said resolutely.
'Yes Mistress,' he replied.
'And the rest of the little black cats answer TO ME.'
'Yes Mistress,' he replied.
'I RULE!' She said, glaring at him, daring him to refuse.
He sniggered a little. 'Yes Mistress,' he said softly.
'You are excused,' she said, and started clearing away the dishes.
He made haste while the going was good, disappeared into the front room with Julienna, his eye carefully fixed on the doorway from time to time, anxious about any sudden outbursts.
God and Julienna married a few months later. The wedding was well attended. The second of a dozen little black cats had found a home.
Rihanna was far from impressed.
The Father Infinite, the Father Eternal, the Father of Glory, the Father of Love. Time for an ending, of sorts. Time for the end.
'Yep, Dan. First thing I remember in my heart, on those cold and lonely nights when Elenniel is out of town, and I am slumbering down to sleep. That I became aware. First of his love. And then.....'
'Yes,' responded Daniel the Seraphim to his big brother Michael's words.
'Well, that would be telling wouldn't it.'
'Michael. Good onya.'
'Ha, little brother. It will take more than your smooth talk to get the secret of eternity out of me.'
'That idiot too,' replied Michael.
The Children of Destiny, the Children of Fate, were at the 'Den of Iniquity', Ambriel's new hangout out Cottisloe beach in Perth in Terraphora.
The Den of iniquity was aptly named. Ambriel was pretty damn iniquitous these days. And, apparently, having the time of his life.
And the theophany didn't seem to mind one little bit.
'Ambriel. Are you ever going to shag a woman again?' asked the frustrated Meludiel.
'You haven't given us any for over a thousand years,' said Gemma Watkins.
'We are getting tired of waiting,' said Justine Atkinson.
Ambriel was sitting with his new boyfriend, Marcus.
'Me and Marky Marky Mark are besties, now, babes. Only his soft hands can touch my soul.'
'I bet that's not all their touching,' smirked Meludiel.
Ambriel almost blushed.
'He always was a pretty gay angel,' said Azrael.
'Yep,' replied Cosadriel. 'The Scottish idiot finally said something right.'
'As opposed to you,' replied Azrael. 'I mean, I do acknowledge once, about a googolplex ago you admitted you were an idiot. And you got that right. But not too many confessions since.'
'Bite me, Haggis breath,' replied Cosadriel.
'Oh, shove it up your sporan,' replied Azrael.
'That's an idea,' said Cosadriel, and disappeared into the den of iniquity.
The Children relaxed, and then trouble walked in.
'Hey losers. How's it hanging.'
'Oh, fuck off Satan,' responded Daniel instantly to the Devil.
'Hey, leave Sat alone, Arch Primitive,' said Jesus, coming into view. 'We're best buddies these days.'
'The Dark Lord has finally slain the wrath of the Christ Child,' said Michael soberly.
'Heavy Metal is my new drug,' said Jesus, wearing his Morbid Angel T-Shirt.
'I'm sure Jenny likes that T,' said Meludiel.
'Hey, she's a big fan,' said Jesus.
'Yeh, right,' said Meludiel, almost mocking Jesus.
'I've got standards, bitch. Not a fucking hypocrite like some faithless ones I could mention.'
Meludiel went silent. That rebuke stung.
'No longer Christ, right,' said Azrael casually.
'Ah, well. Technically I acknowledged that a century ago,' responded Jesus. 'The game was up. It had gone on long enough.'
'That's a relief,' said David. 'Old idols die hard, by the looks of it.'
'Some take forever,' responded Jesus.
'So, what's on for tonight?' asked Satan.
Michael looked at the Adversary. 'Rock n Roll, bro. Not too heavy, not too light.'
'Just right,' finished Daniel.
'Sounds cool,' said Satan. 'Anyone mind if my and Yesh tag along for the evening.'
'Feel free,' said Ambriel.
Cosadriel reappeared, dressed in a kilt.
'Now that is wee farking abomination if ever there was one,' said Azrael.
Cosadriel started dancing around in Scottish style in front of them, arms raised, swinging from side to side.
'And you can shove this up your arse, Azrael,' swore Cosadriel, and hurled up his kilt, shining his naked glory in front of the group.
'Jesus!' swore Satan.
'Some things should not be seen,' said Justine.
'A bunch of bollocks if ever I've seen one,' said Azrael, which got a laugh from the group.
* * * * *
Kayella was in a frightful mood. Her panties were split. That wasn't so bad, but her tights were split as well. And in the most embarrassing of places. She was at a dance rehearsal for a new video clip for an ancient song of hers, and she shimmied over to Callodyn and said 'Get me home, dork. Pronto.'
'Your clutching at your crotch,' he replied, puffing on a ciggie.
'Get me home, idiot. NOW!'
'Hold your horses, ok. What's the problem?'
She moved her hands slightly, but quickly replaced them. 'Don't give me that bloody grin,' said Kayella. 'And you have seen it before, so get that second grin off of your deviant face.'
'Sure sweetie,' he replied.
As they drove through the streets of Rothera in Antarctica, Callodyn happily listening to another win by his favourite Antarctican Rugby League side, the Ice Wolves, he said something funny.
'I split my pants once, you know.'
'Really,' she replied.
'I didn't have undies on,' he said.
'Oh,' she replied, and chuckled a little.
'The room was full of men,' he said.
'Oh, then that's ok,' she said.
'They were all gay men,' he replied.
She turned to him, a big smile on her face. 'What happened.'
'I got propositioned,' he said.
'That's not too bad,' she replied.
'17 TIMES!' he exclaimed.
She was starting to laugh. 'And where was this then?'
'About 20 years ago. At a gathering of Ambriel's ballet friends.'
'Oh, that's right,' she said, remembering Ambriel's current penchant for the same sex.
'It was a night to forget,' he said grimly.
'Did you get lucky?' she asked him.
'Kayella,' he said in that voice.
'Did you hit a hole in one?' she asked him again, a grin on her face.
'Kayella, that's enough.'
'Did your little soldier go through a tour of duty?' she said, and was starting to laugh hysterically.
'Jesus,' he swore.
'Oh, Jesus was there,' and then he couldn't help but laugh too.
Later that evening, after they had retired for the evening, Callodyn was in an amorous mood. 'My little soldier needs a fresh tour of duty.'
'He's been off at the wars fighting the Brown Eyed Monsters, and he needs a little feminine relief.'
She rolled over on her side. 'Do you love me?' she asked him, a big smile on her face.
But he jumped on her, spread her legs, and as he began that motion which Kayella knew oh so well, she said, 'Brave, brave little soldier. I'm sure Ambriel is completely jealous.'
And as he thrust away, all he could say was 'You bitch.'
* * * * *
Black Dream, Zaphor'a official 'Dream Team' at basketball, were on the courts. Michael Jordan, Shaquille O'Neal, Kareem Abdul Jabar, Charles Barkley and Dennis Roadman.
Opposed to them, White Fire. Terraphor's Mascot team of Glory, consisting of Chevvy Chase, Luc Longley, Phil Smythe, Peter Fletcher and Aaron Goodsell.
Terraphora had never once beaten Zaphora at the 'Glory Cup' and they'd played literarlly trillions of matches against each other.
But today, in the heart of Perth, with the Children of Destiny in the crowd, miracles were about to happen.
'What the hell is that Nigga Aaron Goodsell doing in White Fire,' said Roadman sarcasticlly.
'White enough, I suppose,' said Jordan.
'White my butt,' replied Roadman.
'Don't worry,' said Shaquille. 'We'll kick their ass as usual.'
The game got under way.
Woody Harrelson and Wesley Snipes were in the crowd watching.
'A grand on White Fire,' said Harrelson.
'Make it a million,' said Snipes.
'The man is confident,' replied Harrelson. 'I'll take that bet.'
'White honkeys, more like it,' said Snipes under his breath.
'Who do you think will win?' Meludiel asked Michael.
'We'll see,' he responded.
The game got under way, and Black Dream led from the start as usual. But this match was different. Call it the free-frow shooting of Smythe, or the amazing luck of the Most Valuable Player and Greatest of All Time, Peter Fletcher, but White Fire kept in touch for once.
And suddenly there was five seconds on the clock, and White Fire were behind 100 to 101.
'I have an idea,' said Chase, because they had the ball.
He whispered it to the other Fletch. Fletch nodded.
And then the whistle blew, and smythe quickly passed the ball to Chase.
And Chase ran quick, and Fletcher lowered his back, and Chase jumped onto the back of Fletcher, and the crowd went mad as the 'Fletch' leaped through the air, Chase flying like a madman, the commentator yelling, 'He's flying, he's flying!'
Chase plummeted the ball through the hoop, grabbed and held the ring, which suddenly crashed to the ground....
And White Fire had done the impossible. Victory 102 to 101.
In the crowd.
'Hand it over,' said Harrelson.
'See my bank manager' said Snipes. And then Snipes stared at the game and said 'I guess it's finally true. White men can jump.'
* * * * *
Jan Kolby and Chance Kibb'Starr were in Spacehaven. It was a large spacestation which orbited Centralaxxis XVI. It was home. After endless adventures, many involved Dak Bluddhook and the usual crew, they were home.
They kept it simple now, living in the small Spacehaven community of known and trusted friends. 4000 of them, exactly, living together, importing their needs from the planetary body below, and enjoying the spectacular views of the planet each day from space. It was what Chance was used too, and what Jan had finally settled on.
'Do you think this is forever?' asked Chance, in the arms of Jan, looking out at the stars from their quarters.
'It could be, babe. Fuck, I don't know. Life still has that mystery, you know. Even when all is said and done, it still has that mystery. Like there is still something more.'
She looked at him, her blue eyes penetrating his very soul. 'I know,' she said, and hugged him, and all was well. And all was well.
* * * * *
Jenny Gilmore was single again. But that was life for Jenny Gilmore. Daniel showed up from time to time, but they were no longer together. An eternal friend, though, so he promised her. And that was something.
But here at home......
There was still something else yet to be.
Still something more.
Still a glory to know.
For a simple and kind girl from Dalgety in the heart of the Monaro region of New South Wales, Australia.
* * * * *
Jack Dagger looked at the card. It was an Ace.
'You win,' said Cheryl Colson.
'The bra, then,' said Jack.
'You are a devil aren't you,' replied Cheryl.
'And I'll be having you,' said Jack, as Cheryl ripped off her top.
* * * * *
'You know Sammy. When all is said and done, you do have a base element of charm.'
'Yep, base,' stated Sandalphon from the window of Aphrayel's abode, enjoying his scotch. 'Definitely base.'
Samael did not respond.
'Oh, he has his ways,' said Rachel.
'That he does,' said Gemrayel.
'The ways of an Infidel,' said Logos.
'Hey, don't compliment him,' objected Satan.
All eyes looked at Samael.
Who, finally, for the first and last time, reached over to Aphrayel's pack of cards, picked them up and said to her, 'How do you play this game of solitaire anyway?'
* * * * *
5 Spice Girls. Sitting around chatting.
'Well, what is his punishment then?' asked Victoria.
'Death is too good for him,' said Emma.
'Gruesome torture is always an option,' said Mel B.
The three of them looked at Geri and Melanie C.
Melanie C spoke first. 'You're just all jealous of us anyway.'
And Geri had the last word. 'Of Daniel and his 9 inch.....................'
* * * * *
The last stragglers were on the bridge, meeting Callodyn's dare. Suddenly the two ends of the bridge collapsed, and the crocodiles below were ravenous.
'We're fucked,' said Michael.
'Totally,' said Gabriel.
'Look at this fine mess you have gotten us into,' said Azrael to Cosadriel.
'Bite me,' reponded Cosadriel.
Ambriel looked at Callodyn. 'This might finally be it, Dan. The end.'
They all looked down at the ravenous crocodiles.
Azrael looked at Cosadriel. 'You know, bro. This is it. I just want to say, I have always loved you Cosadriel.'
Cosadriel's eyes lit up, and he came forth, and they hugged, and put there noses to each other in perfect bromance.
Michael and Gabriel looked at the two of them hugging, and then Gabriel spoke. 'You know Michael, there were those times in the showers of Zaphon
'I remember,' said Michael fondly, looking at his bro.
Callodyn was looking at the four of them overwhelmed, and then noticed Ambriel smiling at him.
'No, no. Don't even fucking think it, Ambs.'
'Daniel. You know how I feel,' said David, smiling warmly at him.
'For fuck's sake,' swore Callodyn, looking at the approaching menace.
He stared down at the crocs below, looked across at the gap and, with the strengh of heaven, ran, jumped, and landed in the river below. He scramble up the bank just in time to avoid the crocs, and then he turned and looked. And the bridge suddenly collapsed, the children of Destiny dropping down into the river to the hungry crocs below, who made a quick meal of them.
And Callodyn managed one wry grin, as he turned, and headed for home.
* * * * *
A little while later, after certain resurrections and grisly tales, the children of Destiny were back at Cottisloe.
God's little tyke, Jacob, his first-born to Rihanna, was playing with Callodyn. Then God looked at him, and Jacob ran up to him. He was 10 years old.
'Come with me,' said God.
'And let me tell you about Daniel.'
Strange New God's
'Look,' said Zeus. 'It's kind of pathetic, Stan. Where the hell am I? You have had ample years to get with the new program. The Eternal World has been up and running for ages now, and Marvel is still harping on about adventures with Thor, Loki and that ridiculous Odin. What's the problem? Or are you sold out to bla
'It's not like that,' said Stan the Man Lee. 'Commercial considerations have to be taken into account.'
'By Odin's bloody beard, stuff the commercial considerations. Give me some bloody coverage. And don't cop out to Jupiter. I know he woos you, by the way. I a well informed.'
'Stan only bothers with Spidie seriously anyway, dad,' said Hercules.
'Oh, shut up Jackman worshipper. You only obsess over Wolverine anyway.'
'Hey, he's the shit,' said Hercules.
'Yes. I think I agree with that,' said Zeus thoughtfully to his son's statement. He turned to Stan Lee. 'Coverage, ok. At least DC do a lot of War of the God's special's these days, and we get some popularity with the kids. Olympus relies on Wonder Woman a lot, you know. Diana is our brightest star, and blasted Zaphon can go to hell if they think they are going to get all the fame. This is a competitive world. We have all been introduced to each other now, and the full Realms of the Creator are all interlinked. Glory is the goal, and we need ours, ok. And we sure as hell support your sale figures enough throughout our dominion, so get with the picture.'
'I'll see what I can do,' replied Stan Lee, who nodded to Zeus and departed.
Zeus sat down, picked up his pipe, and started puffing away.
'Don't worry so much,' said Hercules to his father. 'They'll get to us in time. Go watch Xanadu or something. That always takes your mind off your worries.'
'Oh, Olivia Newton-John,' said Zeus. 'I've always wanted to get physical with her.'
'Dirty old man,' said Hercules, grinning a little.
'Shaddup,' said Zeus. 'Give an old God his graces.'
'Whatever,' replied the Hero.
The Eternal World had begun. And Realms and Worlds were colliding very quickly in the grand plan of Destiny. And God himself had finished, for the time being, with the focus and attention he had been placing on the Children of Destiny, going off to puzzle on the God's of Destiny for a while. They were old God's, rooted in the ancient days of Earth, and who knew when in the Heart of God they had truly bee born, for God kept mum on that whenever queried personally. Callodyn had his suspicions that, in point of fact, he may not be the oldest of God's children, but God never said a dicky bird. For God to know and for Callodyn to find out as far as he was concerned.
But, yes, a time had come and gone, and a focus had shifted from the Children to the God's. And the Destiny of the God's was the next and important and primary concern of the Most High for now and, forseeably, for quite some time to come.
King David sat on his throne, in Jerusalem, on Mt Zion, on Earth, in the Eternal World, contemplating. Contemplating.
'Zeus!' he exclaimed suddenly. 'Now when did he become real, oh Elohim the Elected?'
The theophany of God, mighty Elohim, looked up from his game of 500 with Daniel the Prophet and smiled. 'Now that would be telling, child of mine. Suffice to say he is very real. Greeks have worshipped him forever.'
'Yes. I know. I am well familiar with the Hellenistic Pantheon. It has long been a bane to our faith. Yet, dare I ask again, father of glory, when did he become real? Was he a sudden inspiration, to give the kids a break, and let the baby have its bottle? I am a monotheist you know?'
Elohim nodded to Daniel about his last play, and stood, stretched himself, and came over and sat down next to David.
'You know, your father was always a bright spark. I remember him as a child. Full of questions.'
'I'm sure,' said David.
'But you were his masterpiece,' smiled God.
David grinned at God. That was kind of him.
'The God's of Destiny are my own, and I rule them, and they elected me, freely, of their own choice at an ancient counsel to do as such.'
'You are not saying they have always been?' queried David, suddenly anxious. 'This isn't a spiritual war in which many deities actually exist? Come on. Get serious.'
'No. I'm not. There's a psalm,' continued God. 'The gods of the nations are all idols and the Lord alone is supreme. Worship him all you god's.'
'Something like that,' said David from his memories.
'And the Word of God is purified and fulfilled 7 times over,' said Elohim.
'Psalm 12 I think,' said David.
'So you work it out David,' said Elohim, and stood, stretched again, and returned to his game with the prophet Daniel.
David stared at him. Not exactly the answer he wanted, but he would work with it.
So he sat there.
* * * * *
'Hare Krishna's. Hare Krishna's. Everywhere I go bloody Hare Krishna's!' swore Philip East, pastor of Potters House Canberra.
'Don't I know it,' said Brenton White.
'And Krishna is real? What the hell is God's problem,' stated Philip.
They were in the foodcourt of Woden in Canberra, chowing down on their lunch break, were they met up often. Rob Preston was eating, sitting next to Daniel Daly, angel Callodyn, and tonight was a RIOT night to promote the Gospel. They did that still, kept the faith in the Gospel still as a church, and even argued Jesus was the Messiah. Mostly just because. Mostly just because.
'God made Krishna,' said Daniel. 'He's merciful and wanted the Hindu religion justified somewhat, because they had somewhat decent standards. He did it for all the idolatries of old. Sorted them out in the end because of the faith of innocent people's hearts.'
'Why bother,' said Philip.
'They stylings of mercies are strange, Pastor,' replied Daniel. 'And God does work in mysterious ways.'
'Yeh, sure,' said Brenton. 'By filling Canberra full of bloody Hare Krishnas.'
The elite of Potters House were not amused on that, quite obviously.
'I don't mind the Hare Hares,' said Camille.
'Give me a break,' said Philip. 'Jesus teaches the truth in the Gospel. Their religion is and remains a cult.'
'Oh, they have charitable hearts. They do good works. It's good enough. Why do we always have to be so bloody judgemental in Potters. All the churches always have a go at us on that because of it. I can never shake being called boot camp girl, you know. I'm older now Pastor. I learned mercy a long time ago. It's not that big a deal.'
'Damned if I'd ever be a Krishna,' said Brenton.
'Your probably not their type,' said Daniel.
Rob spoke up. 'Perhaps some tailorings in RIOT nights towards them? Sink or swim, remember Pastor. The Gospel triumphs because it is the power and wisdom of God. Not an also ran.'
'Mmm,' said Philip East, looking at Rob seriously.
'That's a good point,' said Sophia Sharaf. 'The Gospel is not a pansie poofie thing. Jesus had a hell of a go. It's not for losers.'
'It's why we still follow it,' said Rob.
Philip East looked down at his New Testament. He was listening to this conversation and thinking on it. Interesting ideas. Competitive ideas. Was he for such things? Was he against such things? But he was Pentecostal. And he was Potters House. And they made war in the heavenlies, and didn't concede to a bunch of airy fairy Krishna's.
'I'll look into it Rob,' said Phil. 'But for now the focus is tonight. I expect you all at the prayer room after work, and then into church. We have work to do, and the harvest is waiting.'
'Amen,' said Brenton.
A church which didn't quit, Daniel thought to himself, hearing the conversation. A church which wasn't lukewarm.
* * * * *
'Bloody Krishna himself,' said Brenton.
Krishna the Kleptomaniac, one of the supreme deities of the Hindus, was over by the side of the old Griffin Centre, playing the piano to Nicole Gates and Nicky Kent, who were visiting from the United Pentecostal Church.
Philip had welcome Krishna with a handshake and said he was welcome to the night's RIOT night outreach, and generally meant it, because he did believe in hospitality, an actual strength of Potters House.
'Jesus is coming tonight,' said Philip.
Sophia's turned and looked at Phil. 'He's coming is he? It's been a while.'
'He's a busy guy,' said Philip. 'Lot of churches he gets to, after all. A big world, earth.'
'Glad he stays here,' said Brenton. 'And doesn't stuff off to the Realm of Eternity.'
'We plan on staying on earth for a good long while,' said Daniel.
'Sure,' said Philip. 'Perhaps you have.' Philip East himself was on the list of Cherubim. A little further down than Callodyn, as was Brenton. They didn't make much of a deal about it anymore. More used to their humanity now.
'Ask him,' Brenton said to Phil. 'Where did he come from? When did he become real?'
Krishna had heard the conversation and spoke out loud. 'We've known Jehovah longer than you, kapiche.'
'Bullshit,' swore Brenton under his breath.
Krishna stood and came over to them. 'When did your church begin?'
'0 AD,' said Brenton.
'Hinduism is older,' said Krishna. 'I rest my case.'
'But are you?' asked Philip.
Krishna licked his lips, wiping off some of the twisties he was eating and said, 'There is only one God. The Creator Yahweh. Ok. So I am not going to answer your question.'
Krishna walked back to the piano and continued his tunes with the adoring UPC girls.'
'God made him,' whispered Brenton. 'Damn sure of it. At the beginning of the Eternal World most likely. To give the righteous Hindus a break.'
'He saves the righteous,' said Daniel. 'It doesn't matter the faith, or lack of it. It's the decency and morality of the human heart which counts with God. You know, Jesus didn't even teach he was the only way.'
'Here we go again,' said Brenton.
'I asked John, once,' said Daniel. 'He confirmed it. John 14:6. Most of John, actually. A portrait of Christ, but not the literal history for the most part. Paul had a fixation on Yesh being the only way also, but Jesus made it clear that to the rich young ruler that while to be perfect he should follow himself, but that the commands of God were sufficient for salvation. Why I'm a Karaite Noahide on my base religion of faith.'
Brenton started munching on his chips. 'Sure. Whatever, Dan. You never agreed much with Jesus back in the day in the realm anyway. We were chosen from the foundation of the world, and you were always non-committal on key issues.'
'He didn't claim it then either,' retorted Callodyn. He was in fact correct on that point.
'Can't wait till Jesus gets here,' said Sophia.
That took Brenton's mind off the subject.
Jesus did show that night. There were no cosmic debates on theology. In fact, rather a good time. Krishna the Kleptomaniac did steal the churches acoustic guitar, though. Phil was sure of that when unloaded the van later that night. Bastard Krishna, he thought to himself. As bad as that sly Shiva. Think they can get away with anything.
But the God's of Destiny had their own ways and rules with the world, and Elohim the Elect did not judge them too harshly, for he knew the purpose of all things under heaven.
* * * * *
'Krishna himself died, and went to Sheol. And is gone,' said Callodyn to Taylor. The person the god was based upon was a legendary human of India, who did not know God, and was cast into the world of the dead, and passed away. He is no more. In fact, many of the old deities of the pagan years were real humans in their original focus, but disappeared to sheol. To death, and are no more, because God rejects the faithless and tolerates no rivals. Jesus gets away with it because he is Jewish and acknowledges God, but if a Christian worships Jesus, it is an abomination of idolatry, and they severely risk their salvation. A lot of them didn't make eternity, you know. Sort of fuzzy people at the back of our thoughts. Gone from us. It always was idolatry, the deification of Jesus.'
'Who are these God's?' asked Taylor.
'God created them at the beginning of the Eternal world, because there were some decent among those old faiths who acknowledged the existence of God, the supreme being. Normally, Tails, people of those religions just go to Sheol and are gone from eternal life. Righteousness is what saves, but without faith in God as well it doesn't. You need both. You've noticed, haven't you, everyone in the eternal world believes in God and always did.'
'I have noticed that,' she said softly.
'These God's are just new children, nothing more,' said Callodyn. 'He contracted with them at a counsel when they were young to have fun, for want of a better word, with those of the ancient faiths of idolatry. Just a bit of humour from God. Nothing more, really.'
'Oh,' she said.
'They are not real deities. Just like us angels, children of God, having a bit of fun. Still idolatry all that old stuff. Always has been, always will be.'
'You know this, how?'
'Spoke with God in Zaphon in the Realm when they popped up. He explained the truth to me. Gave me some visions of their recent births. It was fascinating.'
'Why are you going to church, now?' asked Taylor.
'Certain – purposes,' he responded. 'Just hopping along for a few more centuries. Nothing more.'
'You have your reasons I suppose,' said Taylor, and lost interest in the conversation.
Callodyn nodded, and made his way off to the back room to have a look at Monkeyman. He was on downtime for the last few months to rest his circuits, and he wanted to clean him up a little. And he knew, of course, Monkeyman was not real either. Even though liked to think of him as such.
* * * * *
And, in time, even the impossible happens. People make their final decisions on romance. And one way or another, the plan of Destiny would eventually have its say.
'So he's settled up his bill with Melanie C and gone off to Meludiel?
'Pretty much,' responded Sariel to Callodyn's question. 'He made his vow to her. Now and forever. This marriage. I will never leave you if you will have me. Forever.'
'And she agreed?'
'She did,' responded Sariel. 'And good for Daniel and Meludiel. They always belonged together in the end. He always had his deepest crush on her.'
'And you, Sars?'
'Well its not Gloryel. I couldn't commit. Not my style, in the end, Danny boy. Not my style.'
'Mmm,' responded Callodyn.
'And yours?' asked Sariel, curious.
'Divorced, recently. From Taylor, Katy and Kayella. They finally pulled the plug. Had enough of my cheating ways.'
'You lust for those 3. Always did. And your twin is just a loyalty thing with you. Everyone knows that. You don't. We do.'
Callodyn looked long and hard into the face of truth, took a sip of cola, and sighed.
Why did everyone know his heart except himself?
* * * * *
In the Realm of Eternity, there were 700,000 male cherubim angels and 700,000 female cherubim angels created. Each for a purpose. Each for a wisdom of God. And at 347 on the list of male angels was one of the early 'Clanned' angels. The first angel from the 'Daly' Clan, young Daniel Daly. Daniel was born, on earth, in the year 6136 SC. He was a descendant of Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly, through a latter grand-son called Cyril Daly, born in Kingston upon Hull, as Callodyn's offspring were often taken there for their childbirth. Cyril, his father, had returned to the ancient Catholic roots of his Clan, and Daniel Daly had been baptised. He was later confirmed, and his full name on his birth certificate was Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly with a confirmation name of Tarcisius, which had also been the confirmation name taken by the Angel Callodyn as well. Daniel did not follow in Catholic faith, but soon enough joined Haven Noahide Fellowship in Canberra, and resided at 29 Merriman Crescent, the home having stayed in the family. It had become a family tradition to add writings of their own to the family saga, the Chronicles of the Children of Destiny, and Daniel took up his life as this being his main duty as member of Haven Noahide Fellowship. Daniel's twin was Lourdes. A feisty looking Spanish-Italian girl, child of a famous popstar.
Daniel Daly, later on in the Eternal World, had inherited
much of his forefather's humour, but was quite a bit more grounded, even with the family condition of Schizophrenia. He was invited by Callodyn to attend Potter's House meetings with him for a while, and he enjoyed the church for a while, as he did the UPC, but left after a couple of years, settled into his Haven Noahide Fellowship duties. He was a pastor, now, in the Fellowships, had a lot of wealth from his ancient royalties he had also gained, and was content. But he never caught Lourdes, even though they'd met occasionally, and was mostly single over his long eternity so far. Very few children – only 3 – with 3 different wives. But they'd left him in the end, and he was solo again. He visited working girls in Fyshwick, kept that to himself, and had started hanging around Marcus Chuan Chi Chin and Rebecca Hill, who were steady members of the Tuggeranong Mental Health community, which Callodyn also knew. They were more down to earth as friends. More Daniel Daly's cup of tea. Until the goddess Diana called around one day, a fan of some of his stories in the Chronicles, requesting a date. Wonder Woman herself, Diana thought to himself. How ironic.
* * * * *
'Lord Chronology had his hands full, twisting around the strands of time and destiny,' said Daniel Daly to his friend Marcus. 'My birthdate was ultimately reconciled as the 20th of November 1972 AD, the year 6136 SC. That was how it all settled out. The ancient Chronicles eventually settled back into a more true and accurate record of history, rather than the abominations my latter son's Daniel and Callodyn twisted it around to to satisfy their glories. It's all a complicated mess, but Callodyn still gets in and tampers with the record, putting himself as older all the time. And a lot of creative history as well.'
'No kidding,' said Marcus. 'I have been very amused by my own apparent adventures.'
'Yep. Historically, in the REAL world, I created the Chronicles of the Children of Destiny, and all the fables of Daniel and Callodyn are nothing more than that – fables.'
'I vaguely recall as such,' replied Marcus. 'Now what are we having for lunch?'
'Steak sounds good,' said Daniel.
'Don't worry, I'll pay Danny boy.'
'Your a godsend,' replied Daniel Daly.
* * * * *
'A smear campaign?' queried Thor.
'Think about it,' replied Loki, sitting in a hall of Valhalla, munching on Cheet-oos. 'Zeus is on his new popularity campaign, and out to make the rest of the God's look like underlings. I swear, he would have Jehovah himself serve him if he could manage it.'
'By Crom's beard, I forsake the endless bane of jealousy in thine heart, Loki. Thou shouldst vanquish that dark spirit,' replied Thor.
'As your mother vanquished your dark nappies. And, from memory, they were dark indeed,' replied the foul Lord.
'As foul as thine mistress,' retorted Thor, his hand gone to his hammer, ready to rumble.
Loki continued munching on his Cheet-oos. 'True,' he replied. 'Yet Valhalla must gain the glory, for Olympus seeks the throne from Zaphon of rulership of the God's, ignoring the righteous splendour Valhalla maintains.'
'Your concerns for Valhalla are duly noted. And duly ignored,' replied Thor. 'You think nothing but your own prosperity.'
'Nay, I truly seek the glory of our heavenly divine abode,' stated Loki, in apparent honesty.
'To trust you is to trust a fool,' said Thor.
'Then trust a fool,' said Loki, finishing off his Cheet-oos.
Thor looked cautiously at Loki. 'Why smear him? A hero competes?'
'Bah, humbug,' replied Loki. 'Sully his reputation and our own glory will increase.'
'And how does thou purport to accomplish this vile deed?' asked the God of Thunder.
'The next Council of the God's. At Zaphon. When we assemble before Jehovah. I have a surprise planned. A brand new agenda of Valhalla.'
'And I am sure Crom would approve,' said Thor sarcastically.
'Crom can bite me,' said Loki.
'As he has done on many an occasion,' replied Thor. 'I remember the, it was 12 score years ago. Nay, 13, from memory. We were on the fields of splendour...............' and Thor was off, recalling an ancient adventure, to the amused but somewhat bored reception of the tale by his nemesis Loki.
'Can the Lord's anointed be challenged?' asked Bathsheba to her husband.
'I am not the height of arrogance, sweetheart,' replied King David, sitting in the Jerusalem University cafeteria.
'Yet you go about your studies these days as if you are preparing for something,' she said softly.
'Solomon has made it clear enough to me over many aeons the value of study. I stay abreast, and I refresh my thoughts.'
'As you have persuaded me also to do,' she said.
'We are Jewish,' said David. 'We pride ourself on our learning and knowledge. It is why we were chosen.'
'Perhaps one reason,' agreed Bathsheba. 'Father Israel certainly requires that of each of us.'
'A fool lacks knowledge, and plan's fail for want of wisdom,' said David, and turned his attention back to his legal studies book on Andorra.
'Again. Why Andorran Law?' she asked.
'International Law,' he corrected her. 'I am majoring in Andorra. Next time another nation.'
'As you see fit,' she replied.
David sipped on his carton of apple juice, looked at his book for a while, and looked at her. 'It also passes the time, you know. It occupies our eternity. And wisdom is something to delight in.'
'As if you are awaiting a challenge,' she replied.
'That again,' he said. He closed his book and looked at her. 'A challenge? To what? From who?'
'For the throne of your bloody glory,' she said, suddenly somewhat animated, and picked up his carton of juice, sipped on the straw, and stuck out her tongue at him.
He looked at her, puzzled. And, after a while, he said 'Shut up,' softly.
'Oh, the King does fear something,' she said, her eyes lighting up.'
'Yes, your father,' he said. 'For I am wise,' he said mockingly, and poked his tongue at her in response.
'What is it you fear? She asked him honestly.
He looked at her and decided to answer frankly. 'Rumblings are astir. In the Kingdom of God.'
She looked at him, curious. 'How so?'
'Old enemies, and new. And, I fear, they have learned to push a joke even more so in their time. Not so merciful anymore.'
'Have the enemies of God ever been merciful?' she queried somewhat rhetorically.
'I am not even sure if these are the enemies of God. For there is a limit to what will transpire.'
'And what exactly will transpire?' she asked him.
'Destiny chapter two,' he said, and opened up his book and started reading again, leaving a puzzled Bathsheba gazing at him.
They sat in silence for a while, and Bathsheba continued on with her studies in International Commerce, which David had suggested she study. But her curiosity had been piqued and she would know more.
'And who are these enemies?' she asked him.
David closed is book, frustrated. 'It does look as if this is a time for asking questions.'
'Very funny,' she replied.
'Predictable ones. And I have been warned to keep my guard up for – unexpected developments.'
She continued staring at him. 'What exactly have you been told?'
'Not much. Eve was not that forthcoming, and Jehovah just smiled a lot.'
'But what exactly?'
'That I shouldn't take so much for granted, the entire crux of the lesson, apparently. For who know what secrets and ambitions lie in the heart of man.'
'Time for a hero then, it would seem,' she said.
'Probably more a time for a Gandalf,' he said.
Again, she looked at him, perplexed.
'Wisdom will triumph in this epoch, for not all are as wise yet as they think in their hearts. Or cunning,' he said, grinning.
'And Gandalf the white will come to your rescue?' she asked, smiling.
'Probably more Gandalf the Grey. The Pragmatic one.'
She chuckled a little on that statement.
'The servant could indeed suffer more,' he said quite honestly. 'And lest we have our wits about us, such a thing is practically guranteed.'
'Then you will need an Aragorn, dear Gandalf,' she said, impressed with her own statement.
'I have an angel in mind,' he replied.
'Ambriel?' she queried, her eyes lit up.
'His glory has been known. Yet I have an ancient child of mine, a cherubic prophet of preposterous accountings, who should fit the bill quite perfectly.'
'Oh no,' she said.
'Yes,' he replied. 'The biblical author of his 12 chapters of splendour will be the next to taste divine glory.'
'Daniel is conceited,' she said softly. 'A prophet of vainglory. Nothing more. Nadiel testifies to that often.'
'Then he shall learn his humility,' said David.
'And who shall he oppose?' she asked.
'Namesakes. And plenty of them. But the God's above have their time coming also upon them, for they are young, and full of zeal.'
'Young?' she asked him.
'He looked at her. 'I received some information, recently. Sent out a query to a friends list on my email. Got a response from Callodyn.'
'One of your dreaded opponents,' she said.
'He doesn't lie,' said David. 'Free enough with what he will say.'
'Mmmm,' she said. 'Yet these studies?'
'Wisdom,' he said again, tapping his nose.
'Yes, wisdom,' she replied.
He looked at her, satisfied she had asked her final questions, and returned to his book. And, fortunately, he was not disturbed again all that afternoon.
* * * * *
Beyond the Fields of Splendour, afore the Heavenly Valhalla, lies a crooked and desperate pathway, deep into eery mountains, leading to a cave. And that cave wanders downwards, deep into the heart of the spiritual world beneath. And a lone figure, a torch in his right hand, trod that pathway.
He had rode a steed of the winds to the cave entrance, dismounted, and began his dark journey into the bowels of the world. For he had an encounter with another dark lord to entreat his favour.
Loki trod down, for countless steps it seemed, unafraid, for perhaps this was his natural habitat in many ways. And then he came upon a large cavern, lit now by red light, for the glow of magma below was become apparent. He descended a staircase, and came to a marble floor, with strange engravings upon it, and stood, waiting. A stream of hot magma flowed nearby, and while Loki was indeed a deity of supreme strength, even he sweated.
'Blasted devil. He's late,' swore Loki.
'I have been waiting half the hour,' responded a voice. A figure emerged from the shadows.
'Hades. You are here.'
'And waiting your demands,' said the God. 'Dare I ask it? What foolish request has the God of fools sought me out for?'
'Zeus. You are not too fond of him, are you?'
Hades grinned. 'The old man does have some good points. They may be minor, but I have noticed things. Yet what of it?'
'A partnership. Between yourself and I. And the glory of Olympus, Zaphon, and the whole throne of heaven can be ours.'
Hades glared at him. 'Speak on.'
'It has become apparent that the Divine Lord Jehovah has allowed a spirit of competition to arise amongst the God's. And claims of glory against others can be rightfully earned.'
'Yet your deceit is well known,' smirked Hades.
'As your own,' replied Loki.
Hades grinned at that. A very true statement.
'I have my servants,' responded Hades. 'Rulership? A God-awful administration job.'
'Perhaps a divine dictatorship might more suit your style?'
'Go on,' said Hades.
'Jehovah tolerates much. And positions earned can be maintained, now, it seems with a touch more of the old style, as they say.'
'Fascinating,' said Hades. 'War in the Heavenlies. A very original concept.'
'Not quite as drastic,' replied Loki. 'But well worthy of consideration, perhaps. Nay, I was thinking more sedate styles of usurpery, yet opportunities of havoc certainly do exist.'
'And my reward?' queried the Lord of the Underworld.
'Rulership of Olympus.'
'Zaphon always looks pretty to me.'
Hades grinned. 'Perhaps, perhaps we can come to an agreement of sorts.'
Loki put his hand on Hades back and said, 'Now that is what I was thinking too.'
And the God's connived, and ambitious plans were put in motion.
* * * * *
'Krishna Krishna, Krishna Krishna,' over and over again. Philip East sat there at Gus' cafe in Civic in Canberra central, his Lord, Jesus of Nazareth opposite him, staring at the group of praying Hare Krishna's on the opposite side of the road, on the corner of the old Griffin Centre, praying as a group.
'Canberra is overrun by them now,' said Phil.
'The God's are at work again,' responded Jesus, taking a puff on his rolled cigarette.
'False God's,' said Phil, staring at them.
'Oh, they are real enough now. Call it the divine sense of humour,' responded Jesus.
'From the God who tolerates no rivals,' said Phil, looking directly at his saviour.
'Even when they are wrong, and know it, people still don't really like to change their religion, Phil. Do they?'
Phil said nothig. He knew the point Jesus was making.
'So God has mercy, and justifies the old idolatries with a God who, from most reports, are moral enough anyway. Even the renegade ones usually toe the line.'
'Humph,' said Phil.
'What. You want to compete with them all?' asked Jesus to his Potters House Pastor.
Philip looked directly at Jesus. 'Don't you?'
Jesus took a sip from his latte and looked at Phil. 'The Gospel was motivated on salvation. I wasn't trying to take out the competition just because, you know. And these days, with those religions stable and offering a spiritual home for their followers, I won't complain. They do the work effectively enough also. And Yahweh is acknowledged.'
'Yes, from what I have seen and heard,' agreed Phil.
'So Judge not lest ye be judged,' said Jesus.
Philip smiled at the statement. 'My boy Terry was asking. What is the eternal Terran plain?' asked Philip.
'Earth, again, in a sense. The final aspect of God's Realms. New Terra and Televon and the rest of the planetary bodies are claimed, now. There is a finite number of them in the plans of God, in recent discussions at Zaphon council just up above. And the Realms of Infinity and Eternity and the rest will also be finishing up their total number of discs soon as well. The project is just about complete,' said Jesus. 'That is were the Eternal Terran Plain comes in.'
'What exactly is it?'
'God has researched for a long while. Angelic and human society and infrastructure, as well as our natural fascinations. What types of nature and landscapes we enjoy. And he has made an infinite judgement upon this, from all his observations.'
'And?' queried Phil again.
'Below us. Or above us from Australia's perspective. 100,000 miles downwards. There it will be placed. 10 Million miles thick.'
'Yes?' asked Phil.
'An earthly plain,' continued Jesus. 'Of a practically infinite variety of natural designs of flora, fauna and landscape. A vast plain which is not so much vast – but eternal. Infinite. It will be an endless disc which fills the whole universe at that point. The Eternal Terran plain. The future, God has said. The major work.'
'Jesus!' swore Phil.
'When?' asked Phil.
'Soon,' responded Jesus. 'And the 'Manifesto of Acceptable Competitive Practice' is central to it all. It's been taught over the aeons, in differing ways, but will become all too apparent soon enough. Believe me.'
Philip gazed at Jesus, a little shocked.
'The glory is up for grabs, Phil. So don't sweat the small stuff like Canberra Krishnas. I certainly don't.'
Philip East smiled. His Lord knew what was going on. A great relief indeed.
'Oh, the centre point of it. The central point. Guess its city name.'
'Zion?' queried Philip.
'Negative. A lot more according to the facts of Terran geography this time. The North Pole. And the first region is called 'Arctica'. Technically, the opposing side directly beneath, which will be supposedly reached eventually, is the South Pole in the region of Antarctica. God suggested St Nicholas for the patron saint of Arctica.'
'The Divine humour, again,' responded Jesus. 'So while these here are crazy times, expect the near future to be a nightmare.'
'Indeed,' responded Philip East, pastor of Potters House Christian church, Canberra, Australia, Earth.
* * * * *
'What, you think Krishna doesn't have balls?' asked the Hare Krishna to Brenton White.
'He's a pussy cat,' replied Brenton. 'Saving power of church mouse on a good day.'
'Yeh, well kiss my church mouse butt,' responded the Hare Krishna, suddenly animatedly. 'Because we're kicking your christian butt here in Capital City, schmuck.'
'Yeh, well bite me,' responded Brenton to Johnathon Silverman. 'And aren't you a fucking Jew anyway?'
'I converted to sanity. Krishna makes sense. Your too pride-filled in your gospel to give a damn about us and our ways. I have 3 Indian wives and many children. And I know Krishna personally. I have chosen this faith, and it is my truth. And we'll kick your christian butt on the Eternal Terran Plain as well. We are ready, armed spiritually, and ARE going to rule the world. Because all you guys have left in your tank is wussie alleluias and endless supplies of moaning and winging to Jehovah. We go out and GET BUSY. You guys are past your prime.'
'Fuck you,' said Brenton, suddenly pissed off.
The Hare Krishna suddenly punched him in the head, and Brenton backed off, clutching his nose. It started bleeding.
'Take that, Jesus freak. Fuck with us and its gonna be painful. Krishna is not for Christian wusses.'
'Asshole,' said Brenton, and walked off.
'Don't tell pastor,' said Sofya. 'It will only make him mad.'
'I should,' said Brenton.
'What? Can't stomach a fired up Krishna. You can preach hellfire and brimstone, but can't take it. He must be right.'
'Then go fucking join them,' swore Brenton, and fucked off from the Civic chess pit, up to the bus exchange, sat on a bench, and sulked. The competition was heating up, it seemed. Really heating up.
* * * * *
'He punched him in the nose?' smirked Callodyn.
'Don't laugh,' said Sofya.
But Daniel did laugh, quite a bit. 'Heh heh heh, Potters House taken by a Hare Krishna. Heh heh heh.'
'Oh, and Haven Noahide Fellowship rules Capital City?' queried Sofya wisely.
'Hey, babe. We don't really care. When people get over it they join our faith. We are not competitors.'
'Too gutless to compete,' smiled Sofya.
'100%,' said Daniel. 'Heh heh heh. Punched by a Hare. I am sure Chris will be amused.'
'Your shocking Daniel,' said Sofya disapprovingly, but Daniel just kept on grinning.
* * * * *
'I had thought you represented peace,' said Jesus softly, in the Woden Southern Cross club to Krishna, seated opposite him.
'You misunderstand. We do. Our man was provoked by the extremely arrogant way your Saint approached him.'
'Forgive us,' said Jesus. 'Potters House has always been headstrong.'
'You are forgiven,' said Krishna, softly. 'But do take it as a warning We don't back down so easily as people might imagine about us. We do defend ourselves, Jesus of Nazareth.'
'Apparently,' replied the son of Joseph and Mary.
'Thus, the tone is set. When the eternal plain opens up for business, you will be well aware of our own agenda,' said Krishna, matter of factly.
'Agenda?' queried Jesus, eyeing him.
'King David released some statements to the Jerusalem Post yesterday evening,' responded Krishna. 'Judaism intends to begin an open plan of evangelism in the Eternal Plain. They intend to convert as many as will listen to their message and join Klal Israel. Make no mistakes. Full circumcision, full sabbath obserance and kosher food rules. The whole kit and kaboodle. And they will not back down either. A time to refrain from speaking their word has passed. They now fully intend to rule the world. As we likewise do. And I do believe the God's of Olympus, Hibernia, Albion, Valhalla and many of the others have made this agenda also perfectly clear. The intent is to rule the world. And the empires of faith and man have been built, and the 'Manifesto of Acceptable Competitive Practice' will make it perfectly clear this is a completely acceptable agenda of each and every one of us. And all other players in the game who choose to rear their ugly heads. Kapiche?'
Jesus smiled. 'You warm my heart, Indian Sovereign.'
Krishna smiled. 'And if you choose to accept my Lordship I will warm that heart even more so.'
Jesus smiled yet again. 'Your grace is magnanimous.'
'As yours,' replied Krishna, and smiled that smile at his opponent that Jesus had started to come to know quite well.
* * * * *
'The sheer audacity to suggest I accept His Lordship. The conceit of the man,' said Jesus.
'You said,' replied his twin, Jenna, scrubbing his back.
'I mean, Hare Krishna's are a joke,' said Jesus. 'Only recently have they done anything in promoting their message.'
'Oh, they have been at it a while,' said Jenna. 'Just not as – forcefully,' she replied.
'Well they can bite me. As soon as that bloody document, what's it called, the manifest of acceptable competitive practices, or whatever its called, becomes available, the WHOLE church studies it.'
'I am sure they will,' replied Jenny.
'Damned if I'll let that curry muncher defy our sovereignty,' he said, his fowl mood now quite obvious.
Jenny just continued scrubbing his back, the softest of amused grins now apparent on her face.
* * * * *
'It's a battlefield,' said Callodyn to his grand father of certain generations, Daniel Daly, the 347th Cherubim of Eternity.
'You don't say,' responded Daniel to Callodyn.
'We're still the biggest religion, universally,' said Callodyn softly. 'But that is in the established realms. Do we compete?'
'We have always preached our message and taught it,' replied Daniel. 'But we are not competitors. When room runs out for our communities in the various realms and planet, yes, we will have to settle on the Eternal Plain also. But we are not a player in this game. Not that type of player anyway. We will keep our cool, young Callodyn, and if we did play the game, it is only in the genuineness of our Covenant with God. 7DF is not a plaything. We are serious about our faith, and not into fanciful conversions to win a game.'
'No,' said Callodyn. 'I agree.'
'Then you speak with your Seraphim brother Daniel, and make that clear to him and Valandriel. I think they may have already entertained some ideas about the Eternal Plain.'
Callodyn grinned. 'What do you expect. He is Daniel.'
'Don't I know it,' said the Cherubim Daniel Daly soberly.
'Jesus has the saving power of a slug,' said Rophiel, Seraphim of Eternity, the Prophet Mohammed of Islam. 'He was only popular in his day because there weren't any competitors. Yes, he had knowledge and wisdom, but was unable to convert all the masses. Islam took over, and did a far better job.'
Angela, twin to Metatron in a way, the goddess of the Realm of Paradise, the home of Islam, nodded in agreement, seated upon her throne. The reporter from 'Daily Jihad' seemed satisfied.
'Your words are supreme, holy prophet,' said the reporter.
'He has the grace of a God,' said Angela.
'Praise be to Allah,' said the reporter.
'Indeed,' said Angela.
When the reporter had left the Citadel of Paradise, having gained his answers into the response of Islam to the 'Manifesto of Acceptable Competitive Practices', which had just been released universally, Angela took a glass of wine, and sipped slowly.
'Wine?' queried Rophiel, seated on a lower throne from his glorious lady.
'Who are you to judge me,' she retorted. 'A little for the health, only. Days are coming when I fear I shall need it.'
'Islam is strong,' said Rophiel. 'These God's pose no real threat, and never did, despite their newfound allegiance to Allah. In this new world of the Creators, the enemies of Islam shall disappear as the sun sets each day.'
'Yet the sun has a habit of rising the following morn,' replied Angela, taking another sip of her wine.
Rophiel noted the comment.
Before them, in the courtroom of the Citadel, celestial virgins awaited their commands, dressed in fine splendour, as befitted Rophiel's sense of decorum.
'I fear, dear Rophiel,' started Angela. 'That you have been resting on your laurels far to often. Islam is a minor concern to most, these days. The Jihad has worn thin, and annoyed far more than it has claimed.'
'Our Holy War continues, and the Infidels shall learn justice and mercy,' stated Rophiel, looking at the decanter of wine.
'Perhaps a new tactic, especially now. A softer approach, perchance,' suggested Angel, eyeing Rophiel as he poured out a glass of wine for himself.
Rophiel sipped on his wine. 'Mother of mercy, the stuff is toxic,' he said, but continued sipping on it anyway. 'If a new tactic is required, my Queen, a new tactic will be given. For now we change not with the wind.'
'As you say,' finished Angela, noting the prophet had finished his drink and poured himself another glass. No change with the wind.
* * * * *
'I notice the two theme songs,' said the cheruim Bahaliel, Bahaulla himself, the founder of Bahai faith, to his herald, the Bab.
'Life's what you make it, by Miley Cyrus. Michael's choice,' responded the Bab.
'And Whatever will be, by Tammin Sursok. Saruviel's choice,' finished Bahaliel.
'Very interesting choices for the 'Manifesto of Acceptable Competitive Practices,' stated the Bab.
'Mainstream, accessible and a very clear and obvious message,' continued Bahaliel.
'Like the Manifesto itself,' said the Bab, still flicking through the 25 page document.
'I must entreat thy wisdom,' said Bahaliel. 'How do we respond?'
'We are not those of a hostile takeover in our approach,' said the Bab. 'We never have been. I seen no point in changing our modus operandi.'
'Nor I,' agreed Bahaliel. 'Yet many in our congregation universally do not object to healthy and friendly discussions to communicate our message. A good life purpose, a good reason for living, doing a constructive work in teaching sound religious faith,' said Bahaliel.
'I agree. What do you suggest?' asked the Bab, curiously.
'Drastic times call for drastic measures, and lest we be swallowed up by the many of the not so friendly competitors I do assume are plotting and planning as we verily speak, a more vigorous approach at evangelism, and speaking our word, coupled with a greater competitive spirit from the congregation is really the thing required,' said Bahaliel.
'By God's grace, let it be. Yet let us not lose our own sanities in this undertaking, my dear friend.'
'Indeed, responded the chosen of Bahai.
* * * * *
Sofya sat down with Nicole Gates from UPC. 'Do we love Jesus the best?' asked Sofya.
'God as well,' said Nicole.
'Do we want to shine for Jesus?' asked Sofya.
'God as well,' said Nicole.
'Are we gonna burn brighter than the sun for Jesus?' asked Sofya, and looked directly at Nicole, with that stare Nicole knew all so well.
'Alleluia!' shouted Nicole, and Sofya smiled.
Sofya wandered over to Callodyn. 'She's sold on God at the moment,' commented Sofya, sitting down at the Riot night outreach in the Griffin Centre.
'Mmm,' said Callodyn. 'Her IQ has obviously improved.'
'Watcha trying to say?' queried Sofya in that voice he knew oh, so well.
'Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus,' replied Callodyn. 'For the sake of Heaven's respite, give me a bloody break, ok. Always the man from Nazareth.'
'Oh, pooh you,' responded Sofya, and got up, poked her tongue at Callodyn, and walked over to Brenton.
She sat down. 'What's up, dude?'
'You know what I think of Hare Krishnas?' said Brenton. Sofya looked at him, about to start yet another polemic against the Indian deity. It was not her night.
Out the front the Fletch, Peter Fletcher, and Aaron Goodsell, were looking cool. Peter had a bottle of supposedly apple fizz, which he had actually filled with a little grog, and pastor East was starting to question his breath, looking suspiciously at the bottle he was carrying.
'It's not suprising,' said Jesus to Phil, standing next to him, handing out flyers for the Riot Night. 'Fletch is like that.'
Jesus had been in town for a few months now, and after a bit of an initial rush, things had died down a bit. Most people in Canberra had met him a few times, now, over the many aeons of their lives. It wasn't that big a deal, some said these days. A preacher preaching his craft, it was often commented by Catholics down in Tuggeranong. Oh, Jesus got around to all the churches, but this was Potters House time, in his announcements. A time for this particular pentecostal church, and he appreciated if the others churches left Potters House to have the glory for a while, so the whole church was leaving him alone, letting him do his thing.
'Not the best of examples, I would have thought,' commented Phil.
Jesus looked at him. 'Frankly, maybe not. The decisions of Peter Fletcher I suppose. I don't mandate his every choice in life, you know. He has his freedoms.'
Phil was used to that somewhat from Jesus now. Mercy.
'Perhaps he could eventually get carried away with his liberties, suppose?' queried the pastor.
Jesus looked at the Fletch. 'He's old enough to know. He's got this far in life, you know. Give the kid a break. He has probably a sound enough theology on the issue which works for him.'
'I guess,' said Phil, also looking at Peter.
Callodyn came up to Jesus. 'You'll be at the Christmas Eve morning mass this Saturday down at Holy Family, right. Like you said? We can have that discussion?'
'I'm off then. Good luck with the night,' and Daniel nodded to Jesus and Phil, and disappeared.
'And what about him?' asked Phil. 'Hardly a Christian anyway.'
'You baptized him, Phil,' said Jesus.
Phil didn't respond. The point was taken.
'The Church is large, Phil,' said Jesus. 'Obviously we need some rules, but with our vast size, well. Well we wouldn't function without some flexibility. And we all need the Grace of God.'
Phil nodded. Of all that he knew, that much was still the case. Everyone needed the grace of God. Everyone.
* * * * *
Yet, the disease, spiritually, occurred once more. Anti-Semitism. A wrath from Loki and Hades. It was 17,000 years of war, in the heavens, and throughout the universe, and the Eternal Plain of Terra was put on hold, as Jehovah examined the results.
The surviving fighters in the God's of Destiny were the Noahides for the Kingdom of God, and the war was against the God's of Destiny of the Nations.
FOR IN A WAR, ONLY THE STRONGEST SURVIVE.
* * * * *
David the Wise. King David, King of Klal Israel, who now, under judgement of the God's of Zaphon, were all Noahides, as the God's tolerated no other religion from Jehovah, but one, in the legal judgements of the Court for the establishment of competition in the soon adventing Eternal Terran Plain, according to the legislative interpretations of the 'Manifesto of Acceptable Competitive Practices', and allowing but one, only the original avenue of faith could be permitted. And not even the most urgent cry of love from the Rabbis of Worshipping Glory could be allowed, for it was but the Adamic-Noahic Covenant community which was tolerated by the God's. All things since then were just pale copies by Jehovah of the original revelation of his faith.
Thus Noah reigned supreme.
And the first of the trials of David was this. How on earth could a sovereign King of Israel get along with the princely schmuck, his older brother by one birth position in the hierarchy of Cherubim Glory, Callodyn the Impossible? How on earth could he and Daniel ever get along as, now, Daniel had all the glory as a Noahide and ruler of 7DF under the tutelage of Cherubim Daniel Daly, 347 on the cherub list, but a quieter competitor in the grand game, 7DF being the largest and most official of the Noahide organisations. How could he possibly ever hope to get along, especially as Daniel had requested David's presence and that they work together as a team to put the God's in their place. He wanted to get along and work it out with the Jewish schmuck in his own words, now that the faith community was one.
How on Earth could David's pride ever tolerate such a reality?
Time would tell, soon enough indeed.
* * * * *
'I've fucking had enough,' said Jesus. 'Enough. Enough, enough, enough, enough, enough. My fucking fill.'
Jenny Cheetham was not impressed. Her twin was rarely given to swearing.
'And now he pulls the fucking plug, just when it looks like I might finally get some Christ status going,' said Jesus.
She smiled, and hugged him, but he wouldn't be consoled.
5 hours later, in downtown Cooma on Earth, sitting in the Cooma Library, an Earth based on early 21st Century realities, the chosen epoch, Jesus still hadn't calmed down much. The theophany walked in, and returned a library book, much to the giggles of the female librarians, and spied his Cherubim son.
'Humph,' said Jesus, but softened immediately.
'What do you want?' moaned Jesus.
God looked at his son.
'Are you over it, then? Finally had enough power mad crusades?' asked God.
'I guess so,' responded Jesus.
'Well? Have you?'
'Yeh. Sure. Whatever.'
'Right. Good o, then. Time for you to get your first job from me then.'
Jesus looked at him. 'Uh, wha? You've never given me a task.'
'Didn't need you till now. Let you do your own thing for a while. But it's a pretty bloody busy future, and I need a trained theologian.'
Jenny Cheetham looked at God. 'What on earth could you possibly want Jesus of Nazareth for?'
God looked at her, and smiled warmly. 'Hello Jenna. Nice to meet you again.' He turned to Jesus. 'The North Pole is the REAL capital, when it all comes down to it lad. It's where the real power of Eternity lies. I don't let many know this?'
'David? Have you told David?'
'No,' said God.
'Callodyn? Have you told Callodyn.'
'No,' said God.
'Who have you told?' asked Jesus.
'Just Gabriel of Eternity.'
Jesus looked at God and looked at his twin, and smiled for once. 'What do you want from me?'
'It's a challenge running it all. IF you've grown up, they need a big brother. Someone with a heart of Gold to get them out of their shit. And you'll need an official congregation of workers.'
'What did you have in mind?' asked Jesus, now smiling quite a bit.
'Churchy type people,' said God. 'Lovebugs. You know the type?'
'Does this organisation have a name?'
'Kingdom Soldiers. I need a field marshall. Will you do the job?'
'What do I call them?' asked Jesus.
'Their names, you idiot. But they have ranks in the Kingdom. I'll leave it with you, then. And remember, the North Pole is ALL the power in the end. Secure wise abodes and addresses. I'll leave that up to you. So, I can leave that with you? Don't need to spell out details do I?'
'No. No you don't,' said Jesus of Nazareth.
God turned to leave, and then he turned back to him.
And he said oh, so, very, very, softly. 'Good work kid. You made your old man proud.'
And he left.
And Jesus of Nazareth was on top of the world.
* * * * *
'Gabriel, Gabriel, Gabriel, Gabriel, Gabriel, Gabriel. Whatever shall we do with Gabriel of Eternity?'
'Shaddup Ambriel,' said Gabriel.
'Big brother, what is that document you have been hiding all week? Please enlighten me.'
Gabriel sat in the dining room of Terraphon Keep in the Realm of Eternity, looking carefully at his brother Ambriel.
'It's a different document to Raphael's. I will admit that. I am sure he has shown you his, but I shall not show you mine.'
'Ooh la la,' said Ambriel. 'I should sweet talk Aquariel into getting you to confess.'
'Ha, that old witch,' said Gabriel.
'I here you two are currently married?' queried Ambriel, suddenly concerned.
'Don't remind me,' said Gabriel. 'She's hell.'
'Spill the beans, bro,' said Ambriel, cradling up next to Gabriel and exhibiting the usual love that Ambriel was so famous for.
'You have your own letter, I am sure,' said Gabriel. 'I am dutifully informed to the limits of the Saruvim themselves, have all the children of Eternity been addressed by our father.'
'Yours smells good,' said Ambriel, who was a little jealous. 'I mean, I loved mine, but you've got something special there. Callodyns? Bweh. Smelt horrible.'
'I read Callodyn's, actually,' said Gabriel. 'The smell is perfectly natural for the job at hand, and his reward is ample enough. He certainly did not complain to me, and said he was absolutely thrilled with his charter.'
'Lucky devil,' said Ambriel, spying Gabs document, but bumbled off, looking for Aquariel and their agreed upon lunch date out by the Sellawon.
Gabriel, naturally, had read his charter a number of times. He was informed somewhat the Jesus had similar instructions, and that he was to look out for Jesus, when it all came down to it. But some of the private info near the end of his charter. My God, had he been blessed above and beyond his brethren. Very key data, in fact. Good stuff to know.
Life was good at the moment. They had been summoned to Eternity by God who wished Angels at Call of Duty for a while, and their official Charter's of Eternity had now been given. They had their disc of overseersmanship, and numerous new portals to the Eternal Terran Plain had been established. Now, in a very real sense, eternity had finally begun. Countless beginnings, it really seemed, and their had been. But their had been a point all along, and Gabriel now saw that point. Authentication of all the Realms and Worlds of God through some very real living experiences. But the ultimate world had dawned, and he was ready. He was most definitely ready for his new beginning.
* * * * *
'So, Daniel. Your retired then,' said his father Cyril.
'Yep,' replied the 347th of the Cherubim. 'Officially last week when I was given my charter. Callodyn and Daniel have 35 years more service, then likewise.'
'Ambitions?' asked Cyril.
'Adventures in Tuggeranong,' said Daniel. 'I have practically unlimited funds, and the Trials of Eternity end here for this puppy. Game over. That's the end of Daniel Daly.'
Cyril smiled. His son was ever the joker.
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath
'Callodyn. How many fingers am I showing you?'
'That's what I think of this shitty Hull City Tigers match.''
'Aw, come on babe. What could be better than freezing cold temperatures, a boggy match, cold pies and shitty beer?'
Kayella raised the second finger.
'It's also only a friendly, non competition match,' smiled Callodyn.
Later on Cal still had on his Hull City Tiger's T-Shirt.
'You know, babe. I love it when you are angry.'
'You love a lot then,' she said disinterestedly at his sexual approach.
He cradled up next to her on the couch in their Northern Pole residence.
'By the way?' she asked him. 'What are you doing here? Don't you have a mandate disallowing visit to the Terran Plain?'
'Lord Chronology is backdating this historical episode,' replied Callodyn.
'Who is Lord Chronology?' she asked.
'Anyway, Tiger's are the fiercest of creatures.'
'I thought Bulldogs were the fiercest of creatures?' she replied, regarding Callodyn's NRL team in the Australian Rugby League comp.
'Them too,' replied Callodyn. 'But Tiger's have a dark side. A wrathfully dark side.'
'Yes,' she said. 'They smell.'
He looked at her bluntly, and went off to the back room. Soon he returned, all polished up after a shower, shave and lovely aftershave, even though he disavowed the stuff.
'Do you have ANY action in you?' she asked him, again disinterestedly.
He looked at her, again bluntly, and left the room.
17 weeks later he returned. She was in the kitchen, making lunch.
'There,' he said, throwing down the prized possession onto the table.
'What the hell is that?' she asked him.
'Velociraptor egg,' he replied. 'The mother almost took my arm off. For you babe.'
She looked at it, took it to the frying pan, cracked it, and a big yolk came out.
They had omelettes for a few days. She curried the remainder.
He still stank.
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath II
'Where are we going?' asked Victoria.
'I am................not sure,' replied Saruviel Savereign, all dressed in flowing gowns of darkest black.
They were on a bus, at the North Pole of the Eternal Terran Plain, flowing through the city. It was the 'Blue Circuit Special', free to ride, which ran through the entire southern side of the main city area of the North Pole.
'You didn't tell me,' she said. 'What we are doing today.'
'Victoria Adams. It is not the business of Saruviel Savereign to disclose every detail of his affairs to his consort.'
'No,' she said, and remained silent.
People were looking at them. A Spice Girl, someone noted. They didn't bother them, though. There was a lot of respect in the North Pole for privacy.
She took out an issue of vogue from her handbag and started reading.
'Candace is upset,' said Saruviel, out of the blue.
'She is not a dinosaur. I do not know how many times I have had to stress this. She is a dragon.'
She's a Velociraptor,' retorted Victoria.
'Yes. And a damn fine one to boot,' replied Saruviel. 'Yet her father was a Terraxian Thunderclaw, and she takes mostly from him in my own opinion. She is a dragon.'
'And why is she upset?' asked Victoria.
'Her latest egg was stolen. And she bid me find the damn thing and exact swift justice.'
'Oh,' she replied.
The bus circuited the south side. They changed, and came onto yellow bus for the East.
'I have pictures of farting football players and smelly tigers in my visions,' said Saruviel. 'It makes no sense.'
'A football team called the Tigers, perhaps?' suggested Victoria.
'What would a football player want with a dragon egg,' he replied, gazing intently at her.
She looked downwards. 'I know someone. Said he would do this to impress a lady when he had to. Bragged to me that he would.'
He stared daggers at her.
'Callodyn,' she said softly.
Saruviel Savereign looked at her with those dreadful eyes.
'Then he shall be dragon food,' responded Saruviel.
They found Callodyn's abode. It was in the telephone directory of all things.
Kayella admitted they had been eating omelettes from the Dragon egg.
'The dastard shall righeously pay,' swore Saruviel.
'I'll give you one of his earth comics to appease your wrath,' replied Kayella quickly. 'An ancient one. 21st Century old earth. A spare Batman issue he has here at the moment.'
Saruviel's eye lit up. 'They are..............rare. It shall suffice.'
Kayella went to the back room and got the comic.
Saruviel sniffed at it, looked it over, and said, 'The cretin may have mercy on this occasion. Please ensure it happens not again.'
'Aye aye, captain,' smirked Kayella.
4 weeks later.
'Where the fuck is my comic?' swore Callodyn out loud, heard all over the flat.
He came into the room and looked at Kayella, his arms raised in gesture.
'A dragon ate it,' she replied.
'What dragon?' swore Callodyn.
'Saruviel Savereign,' she replied.
'Oh,' said Callodyn, softly.
'Hero my butt,' Kayella said under her breath later that day.
Callodyn did not object to the statement.
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath III
'Candace does not have a mate at the moment. The eggs will be unfertilized for the time being. She lays one periodically, depending on her will mostly,' said Saruviel, looking at his cards in the game of Bridge.
'Fascinating,' said Callodyn. 'Does she have an income?'
'I give Candace an allowance,' replied Saruviel.
'Can eggs be purchased. They are very tasty.'
'My God, man. Tis an abomination,' replied Saruviel. He looked, though, at Callodyn carefully. 'What price are we talking about?'
'At 87 Degrees of the compass, I have a team of Realtors purchasing land in the Great Terran plain,' replied Callodyn. 'We purchase quality land, which is already part of an established dominion. Nothing too far out. I don't mind paying if it is not a big stretch of a private world.'
'I see,' replied Saruviel, interested.
'He loves 87,' said Kayella.
'Why?' asked Victoria, and bit her tongue. 'Oh, of course. Daniel Daly. Numerology equals 87 in ordinal equivalents. Dan's favourite system.'
'Kapiche,' responded Callodyn.
'What is the offer?' queried Saruviel.
'1 Million US Dollars per egg, and a dragon ranch for each egg, and I'll have it built. She can have them reserved for future seed.'
'And my fee as agent?' queried Saruviel.
'An extra million each time.'
Kayella smiled. That was play money on Callodyn's royalties for his writings.
'The agreement is reasonable,' said Saruviel. '1 Spade,' he called.
Callodyn looked at his cards. 1 Spade would practically take him already.
'Can we at least get a cook to cook them properly,' said Kayella, when their guests had left.
'Sure,' said Callodyn.
'Are there any other exotic desires I should be aware of?' asked Kayella.
'Tiger testicles,' said Callodyn.
Kayella looked at him.
'But only smelly ones,' he said, the little grin now apparent.
That night she cuddled up to him. 'With all that tiger testosterone in you, your sure to be a hell of a lover,' she said, being obvious.
'I already have a name for a new product we can name it,' he replied.
She looked at him amused.
'Tiagra,' he said.
She reached down, cupped his Tiagras, and said. 'But are you sure you are up to it?'
He pounced on her, ripped off her bra, and said with a grin.
'Its not the only pussy I'll be eating tonight!'
Kayella enjoyed his living up to those words.
A night to remember indeed.
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath IV
'17 Leagues westward, aye lad. We are travelling 17 Leagues westward.'
'Yes Captain Daniel,' responded Valandriel.
Ariel, in the back seat remarked to Elsabel. 'They are nuts. Think they are pirates.'
'Oh, Valandriel has always been pretty much a pirate to me,' responded Elsabel, smiling.
Ariel looked at her honestly. 'You think Daniel is some kind of saint?'
'Methinks the damsels are plottin mutiny,' said Captain Daniel to his henchman.
'Aye, Capn. They're a rebellious bunch,' responded Valandriel.
'We should give them the lash,' said Daniel.
'I'll give you the bloody lash if you don't get us to Callodyn's new place,' swore Ariel behind Captain Daniel, and punched the back of his head lightly.
'Rebellious alright,' said Daniel. 'I should get in there and give her a good thrashin.'
'Try it,' said Ariel. 'I'm trained at Karate level Dan Master 78 now.'
'That's pretty high Captain,' said Valandriel. 'Can Daniel San match the challenge.'
Daniel kept on driving, but looked in the mirror. Ariel was looking savagely back at him.
'She's a mean tiger of a woman, by the looks of her,' said Daniel. 'Twould take a real man to tame that shrew.'
Ariel stuck up her fingers at him and said 'Bite me, Captain Dickhead.'
Valandriel and Elsabel laughed all the way to Callodyn's.
'So, she's a tiger, is she,' said Callodyn.
'She's a vicioius little minx, if you ask me,' responded Daniel.
Ariel looked up from the couch and smiled at them both. 'Who, me? I'm all heart.'
'And she'd have yours by the looks of it,' said Callodyn to Daniel.
'She expects it now. You know. Fidelity. I leave for a day, and my mobile never stops ringing. If I even mention Ambriel's twin, bloody hell. Deep water.'
Ariel glared at Daniel.
'I guess love conquers all in the end,' said Callodyn. 'And some times its the fairer sex which comes to the rescue.'
'He's a faithless fart,' said Ariel. 'Good for nothing.'
'Except wrestling Tigers,' responded Daniel, and poked his tongue out at her.
Later that evening, in the guest room, Daniel was smooching up to Ariel.
'Callodyn recommended I try his Tiagra solution to master your fercious love.'
Ariel did not reply.
'Helps lovemaking. Fierce women need fierce loving.'
'I'll wait forever then,' she said sharply.
Daniel sniggered. 'Yeh. Suppose we should get a divorce then.'
Ariel suddenly leaped on him, and licked his forehead.
'Nice pussy,' said Daniel. 'Don't be too rough.'
'You better get that Tiagra then. I'm up for some primal passion,' she smooched.
And she was. And the scratches only hurt for a few days. Daniel didn't mind though. Some times a good licking is what really solves the eternal mate conundrum.
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath V
The Tiger roamed around the sanctuary. It stared at its viewers for a while, and settled down to gaze at them, unfearing.
'What do you think it's thinking?' asked Kayella to Callodyn.
'That we are probably his next meal if he can escape his enclosure,' said Callodyn smartly.
She hit him on the wrist, and returned her gaze to the tiger.
'Why do we still lock up tigers? Old ones even communicate with mankind now.'
'They grow in intelligence as well,' said Callodyn. 'Have a soul just like us. But Theodore over there is young. Doesn't know the ways of the force, yet.'
Kayella looked at her man. 'Do you know the ways of the force?'
Callodyn started breathing heavily. 'I HAVE BEEN ON THE DARK SIDE ETERNALLY, DEAREST KAYELLA!'
She looked up into his eyes. 'I believe you.'
'Theodore is young,' said Callodyn, looking at the tiger. 'He has his whole life ahead of him. He will learn to adjust to mankind in time.'
Kayella was staring at the tiger, as it started raining gently. She was looking at the tiger and said, 'Do you think you will ever adjust to mankind?'
'Probably not,' said Callodyn.
She almost agreed with him.
Soon it started pouring down heavily, and they found the sanctuary of the zoo cafeteria.
'I mean, mankind is rather thick, when it all comes down to it. They live on basic levels. The three F's as I call them.'
'And what are the three F's,' she said, now amused as she was used to his jokes.
'Well, Food for starters. They all need the grub. Even me. And we have to work to get it.'
'And the next F?' she asked.
'Fighting. All grunts ever do is fight. The world is full of them.'
'Not you, I take it,' she said grinning.
'No. Not me. I'm into the third F.'
'And what is the third F, oh wise one?' she asked sincerely.
That night, in the bedroom, he showed her.
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath VI
'Everything is AWESOME, Ambs,' smirked Callodyn.
'Shaddup,' replied the Seraphim angel Ambriel.
'You don't smell that bad.'
'It's tiger shit,' said Ambriel.
'What's wrong with that?' asked Callodyn innocently.
'HULL CITY TIGER SHIT!' Exclaimed Ambriel. 'They dumped me in the outside lavatory because we lost our bet.'
'Mmm. Aw, you smell fine.'
'It's not as bad as Michael anyway,' smiled Ambriel.
'Shitman? How so?'
'Let's just say I got away with being dumped in shit. The toxic festering hell they threw Mikey into – best not to mention.'
'I'll have to check with Daniel on that,' replied Callodyn.
Michael and Ambriel had laid a Quadrillion dollar wager on Arsenal defeating Hull in the 788th Great Eternal Plain World Championship Team Final. Hull City had been offended, and made a contract if they could win. Callodyn and Daniel would suffer if Hull lost, Michael and Ambriel would suffer if Arsenal lost.
'You know. It's always us boys. And I notice those twins of ours. Always their little smirks. All the way back to Ariel. Perhaps we could have some fun,' suggested Callodyn.
'Mmm,' thought Ambriel. 'What do you have in mind?'
'Play on their pride. They actually have some.'
'What do you have in mind?' asked Ambriel.
'Knitting,' said Callodyn squarely.
'Are you kidding. It's all Meludiel does on the weekend these days.'
'Then everything is awesome,' said Callodyn. 'Because I have been knitting since the Eternal World Began, every afternoon for 5 hours, and working on my speed constantly. I'll challenge Meludiel, and its the Males versus the Females of Eternity on the line.'
'I'll sweet talk her into the contest,' smiled Ambriel.
'And if we lose?' asked Meludiel.
'You wash all our dirty laundry for the next thousand years – by hand – without a complaint.'
'Fine,' said Meludiel. She was quite confident the boys would be humbled yet again.
The day dawned, and the Children of Eternya were gathered at the North Poles 'Universal Stadium' seating 1 million souls.
God was present. 'A jumper. For babies. First to finish properly, wins. Are you ready?'
Meludiel looked at Callodyn. This would be a piece of cake.
Very shortly later Callodyn finished. Very shortly later. Meludiel gulped. How on earth was that possible?
'Good on you Meludiel,' insulted Elenniel.
'Way to go girl,' said a fowl looking Gloryel.
'Basically, you suck sis,' said Aquariel.
Meludiel was not impressed.
'Oh, don't worry,' said Callodyn, to a depressed looking Kayella in the laundry. I'm sure dog shit will come out eventually.'
The look on Kayella's face summed up her entire afternoon.
The Dark Side of the Tiger of Wrath VII
'Endless. The power of immortality,' said Lucifer, 'is that it is endless. And therein lies the dark side of the Tiger of Wrath.'
'Fascinating,' said Satan. 'And what does that mean exactly?'
'The Evening Stars are the Lions of Wrath. Yet we of Infinity are the Tiger's of Wrath. They may indeed claim Majestic glory, but everyone knows a Tiger kick's a lion's butt.'
Satan stalked over to the Fyshwick cafeteria toilet, emptied his bowels, and returned. 'I think I just shat out the Tiger's of Wrath listening to your bullshit Lucifer.'
'He's fascinating,' said Lucy Smith. 'So wise,' she said, batting her eyes up at Lucifer.
Satan looked at her. 'You know, Lucy. The fascination by yourself with my Saruvim brother has long been a mystery to me. He is fowler than a pit full of toxic festering sludge.'
'He's handsome,' said Lucy, her eyes transfixed on Lucifer.
'If you call dogshit handsome,' said Satan.
'He's intelligent,' said Lucy
'Compared to a gnat, he does have some admirable qualities. I do admit that.'
Lucifer stood and stretched himself, and looked at Satan. 'Gnat's were one of those plagues of Egypt, weren't they?'
'And you are the greatest scourge of evil mankind has ever known,' snickered Satan.
'Coming from the Devil, that's rich,' replied Lucifer.
'Takes a devil....'
'To know a devil,' finished Lucifer. He looked at Lucy. 'I thought you were hung up on Enrique. Or Daniel. Now you are hanging around Australia One in Eternya, with losers like us. What gives?'
'She's lost her marbles,' said Satan.
'I like Lucifer's marbles,' said Lucy, grinning wickedly.
Satan glanced down at Lucifer's crotch. 'From memory, those marbles have seen more harlots than I've had hot dinners.'
Lucifer glared at Satan. 'And your marbles have seen more sheep's backsides than I could ever count.'
Satan grabbed his crotch. He'd once had a fascination for the bestial in life.
'Anyway, the Tiger's of Wrath have unlimited potential to cause havoc, chaos and misery,' prided Lucifer.
'Yep. Been there, done that,' said Satan, and sat down and opened his can of Coca Cola.
'Yep,' said Lucifer, and also sat down, sipping on his Sprite.
'You seem both – uninspired,' said Lucy cautiously.
'The river has run dry, sweetheart. The world has turned, and practical uses for the likes of us have come and gone. We were once feared. Now any Tom, Dick or Harry get's up and starts a prayer campaign and thinks they can torment us eternal. Problem is, shit starts happening to us if we fuck around much anymore anyway. Jehovah has ample diehards to deal with the likes of us.'
'Ain't that the truth,' said Lucifer, sipping on his Sprite.
'Then bow your heads, admit the Glory of God, and move on,' said Lucy. 'As simple as that.'
Satan stood, bowed dramatically and said, 'You have kicked my arse Lord Jehovah. I repent in dust and ashes.'
'Well done,' said Lucy Smith, and hugged Satan. She looked at Lucifer.
'Don't expect too many miracles in one day,' said Lucifer. Lucy glared at him and, feeling guilt, he stood. 'May the Most High, the Lord of Glory, forgive this humble sinner,' he said, bowing very formally.
And Lucy kissed him and hugged him.
And gave him some that evening.
'The Heart Goes On'
Old Jehovah was feeling his age. A lifetime of lifetimes he had lived, and dreams were on his heart. Dreams of life and destiny and love and truth. Dreams of faith and mercy and justice and peace. And dreams of Fear and Hate and Wrath and Vengeance. And dreams of quiet, perfect, eternal, consolation.
* * * * *
'Jack. Is that your name then, lad?'
'Aye,' said Jack.
'And I suppose you'll be wanting the apartment number of Rose, then. Won't you Jack?'
Jack Dorson smiled. 'Who else?'
* * * * *
Callodyn picked up the newspaper. 'The Champions of Glory. WHO ARE THEY? Time will now tell what will be. Time WILL NOW TELL!!!!! Bwah ha ha ha! The Quintessential Blue Beetle!'
'Whad dafuq?' queried Callodyn. Cherubim 347 smelt suspiciously at work. That old bastard had problems. Real problems.
* * * * *
'For Israel. And for GLORY!' roared Michael the Archangel.
The rowing team set off. It was a hard and long row. 35 kilometres, and they would be setting a cracking pace. But Michael was a Champion of Glory, and the challenge had now come. He was ready, willing and able, and would stand up to the Quintessential Blue Beetle, for he knew verily who that righteous bastard really was.
'Row lads. Do it for father Israel,' yelled Michael. The Star of David fluttered brightly and proudly in the wind, and Team Israel rowed and rowed like they had never rowed before.
Tobias spoke up. 'Your breaking our bloody back's Michael.'
'There will be more than that broken before I am finished with you, Toby Stern,' replied Michael.
'Aye,' said Toby, and kept on rowing at the agonizing rate.
They were being watched. Callodyn and Daniel had been sent as spies from their old man to gaze upon the Israelite challenge to Glory. They were not greatly concerned with old Michael, for he was predictable, believing in solid training and a hard day's work. Basic principles. No match for the wisdom and knowledge of Team Great Britain. The Russians of Radrukiel always remained the old enemy of the Empire in the end.
'Keep it up!' yelled Michael, from the back of the boat. 'We've world records to set before I am finished with you.'
'Like to see you do this,' snarled Toby Stern.
'I've a good mind to speak to your parents,' quipped Michael. 'They assured me you were up to the challenge.'
'For fuck's sake,' swore the young Toby Stern. 'The hell you have been putting us through in training for months now is beyond the joke. What – is it do or die time?'
'That it is lad,' said Michael. 'Now row. LIKE YOUR LIVES BLOODY DEPEND ON IT.'
'Aye aye, captain misery,' said Toby. The other's just kept on rowing.
'They're quick,' said Callodyn.
'As quick as Michael's dick up Elenniel's back passage, and nothing more I assure you,' responded Daniel.
'That quick,' said Callodyn.
'Aye,' responded Lord Sarcasm.
'I'll have your guts for garters if you don't bloody break 25 minutes,' swore Michael at his crew.
'You would,' said Toby, grunting away.
'I sense mutiny in the lad. And he's so young,' said Michael.
'Grand dad. Bit me,' swore Toby.
'Keep at it ya bunch of scurvy dogs. I've seen dead grandmothers fart more fiercely than your lousy rowing.'
'Aye, Captain,' said Toby again.
'And no more complaints. Or I'll make a fierce end of you and raise up a team of actual committed damn Jews.'
'Bite me,' swore Toby at his grand dad.
'He's really having a go, isn't he,' said Roger Feldheim to Toby.
'Something's got up his arse. The challenge from Cherubim 347. The official Wars of the Empires of Glory. All in accordance with the bloody manifesto of acceptable competitive practice.'
'Israel is passive,' said Roger.
'Not any more,' replied Toby.
'Is that talking I hear!' yelled Michael, glaring at the two rowers.
'Obviously,' said Roger softly to his crew mate.
'Should we be worried. They are actually setting a cracking pace,' replied Callodyn. 'Status points are awarded for each championship. We can't afford to be servants,' he said concerned.
'You worry too much,' said Daniel. 'Radrukiel, I tell you. And Saruviel's yanks. They are the biggest threats. But I fear the Mongolians have grown in leaps and bounds recently, and old Sadurael is a diehard of ancient days. Just monitor them and keep the time.'
'Aye,' said Callodyn, as they continued driving along the river bank in a golf buggy along the track, spying on the Israelite training crew.
'Radrukiel the redundant, I think,' said Azrael. 'He's no match to Scotland's glory.'
'Don't be too certain, idiot,' said Cosadriel, using the binoculars to monitor the Israelites who were now starting to come into view on the race to the finish line.
'The Scottish-Icelandic Dominion shall shatter all bloody Russian dreams of Glory,' snarled Azrael. 'Or my name's not Billy Connolly.'
'Your right. It's dimwit,' said Cosadriel.
'With your IQ I wouldn't be bragging,' said Azrael. 'Now give me those bloody binoculars. How are they doing?'
'The Jews are quick,' said Cosadriel looking at his watch.
Cosadriel's mobile rang. It was Oshanel again, who had been at the starting line and rung them to let them know the exact starting time of the race.
'Yeh, babe. They are coming into view now,' said Cosadriel. 'Right. Yep. You keep your time, and I'll let you know when they cross. Bye sweetie.'
'They're quick,' said Azrael.
'As quick as your dick up a sheeps arse,' said Azrael.
'That quick!' smirked Billy. 'And I've known a few sheep too.'
'Scottish cretin,' said Cosdriel.
'Icelandic wanker,' retorted Azrael.
'They are being a bit obvious, aren't they?' asked Meludiel to Ambriel. 'Michael can obviously see them.'
'Oh, they are not breaking any rules,' said Ambriel softly. 'Leave them be. Michael would probably even do the same these days.'
'That's what I'm worried about,' said Meludiel, watching Cosdriel, Azrael, Daniel and Callodyn, obviously having an argument on the other side of the river, where a golf buggy had crashed into Azrael's porsche.
'Row, ya scurvy filled wannabees!' yelled Michael.
'We ARE,' responded Toby.
'Pretty damn hard,' said Roger, second man of the 8 man team.
'I've seen fiercer rowing from crippled granmothers,' said Michael.
'Again with the grandmothers,' said Toby. 'I think he needs some new material.' Roger smirked at Toby's joke.
They crossed the line, and Michael checked the time. It was a good one. Not even that far, now, off world record pace. They would be competitive to say the least.
'Fuck,' they've finished,' said Callodyn, pulling away from the heated argument between Azrael and Cosadriel regarding the dent in Azrael's Porsche.
He checked his watch. He looked at Daniel. 'They are fucking quick.'
Daniel stuck up his fingers at Azrael, and came over to watch the team go ashore on the other side.
'Don't worry. Radrukiel I tell you,' said Daniel confidently.
'Sure,' said Callodyn, who was not so wholehearted in his agreement.
'Good time?' asked Ambriel.
'Good enough,' replied Michael. 'But Saruviel is the danger man. Always has been. Always will be.'
'And them?' asked Ambriel, pointing across the river at the scuffle which had now broken out.
'Clown's,' said Michael.
'Let's hope so,' said Ambriel, and congratulated the team members one by one after their exhausting row.
Later on, in the car, as they drove back to Bethlehem in Israel One. 'They had a good time, didn't they,' said Meludiel to Ambriel.
'And who do you fear, oh Messiah of my heart?' she asked.
'God,' he said, with a subtle grin on his face.
She smiled, kissed him, and enjoyed the music as they drove home through the rain which had just started pouring down.
* * * * *
'For Empire, Spicies?' said Daniel.
'The Empire can shove itself,' said Gloryel.
'Oh, come on,' said Melanie. 'We're the Spice Girls. We rise up to the challenge of our rivals. Girl Power!'
Gloryel looked at her. 'Girl power can bite me too.'
'Ooh,' said Sariel. 'Is that defeat in the heart of the champion of Glory? Have I now conquered and valiantly proven my dominance?'
Gloryel glared at Sariel. 'You can bite me too,' she said sharply.
'Wuss,' said Victoria. 'I'm in. What's the sport?'
'Netball!' exclaimed Daniel. 'I'll help you train as well, but Cherubim 347 is skilled in his motivational speaks, and wants to have a go at training you girls. An ancient crush.'
'Ooh, Daniel Daly,' said Melaniel, the Scary one. 'He's cute.'
'He's cute,' said Daniel. 'We look practically identical!'
'But he wears a masculine beard,' said Melaniel.
'Yes,' said Melanie, whose eyes hazed over. She'd recently gotten a crush on that Cherubim and his recent boastings of the obvious soon arising glory of the British Empire in Eternya, what the Eternal Terran Plain was now called.
'Well, Emma? Are you up for it?' Asked Daniel.
Emma giggled. 'GIRL POWER!' She yelled.
'Good grief,' said Gloryel.
'Wuss,' said Sariel to Glroyel, snickering.
Her response, coming over and kicking his shins, summed up her attitude.
'Bloody training,' said Gloryel under her breath. 'Just when a girl thinks she can finally retire........Thanks Jehovah.'
The spirit of God refrained from commenting.
* * * * *
'What do you say, Chavanel?' pleaded Michael. 'We need you. The Brits have gone off and employed the Spice Girls for their netball side, so we need to match them.'
'I'm hardly an athlete,' said the 67th Female Seraphim of Eternity.
'Gilgadel has always maintained you have a competitive spirit,' encouraged Michael to his Seraphim sister.
'Gilgadel's like that,' said Chavanel. 'My twin thinks the best of everyone. But I'm a Hebrew Folk Singer. I really don't think its my calling.'
'Then I'm calling you,' said Michael, and looked intently into her eyes.
'Well, who else have you asked?' asked Chavanel, the folk singer Chava Alberstein.
'We need the team,' said Michael. 'Elenniel has agreed, and so has Candrel and Rachel. And there are some elderly Cherubim I have in mind. Team Israel. Come on sis. Do it for father Jacob.'
'For father Jacob then,' said Chavanel.
'Your a peach,' said Michael.
Later on, in Ambriel's apartment, Michael was looking at a picture of Meludiel on Ambriel's wall.
'She won't compete for anyone, then?' queried Michael.
'She's an Australian when it all comes down to it, but feels so conflicted between Daniel and myself. And some times she says Saruviel should probably have her loyalty because she married an American.'
'Conflicts of interest,' said Michael.
'Conflicts of heart, I think,' said Ambriel. 'Can't really blame her, you know.'
'Know. I suppose not,' said Michael. 'You don't think you could sweet talk her, though, do you. It would be good if the Messiah's twin could show up for Israel once in a while.'
Ambriel looked at his older brother. 'I think, if you really want her, ask yourself.'
'Ask who herself?' queried Meludiel, coming into the room.
'You,' said Ambriel. 'He wants you for team Israel. For the netball side. To take on the British.'
Meludiel looked at Michael. 'You do?'
'Are you up for it?'
She came over to Michael, touched his hand and said, 'I would be honoured big brother. Thank you for asking.'
They chatted for a while, discussing various details of the plans, and when Meludiel headed back to the kitchen to check on dinner, Michael looked at Ambriel.
'That was a surprise, bro.'
'You've earned more loyalty than you think, Michael.'
'And I think we'll need it,' said Michael, again looking at the picture of Meludiel on the wall.
'This is that important to you?' asked Ambriel.
'I sense challenges coming,' said Michael. 'One after another, in various fields of competition. Sport is the first. Status is on the line. You know the quirky ways of God. Expects us to live up to our bold oaths of the past. Just have to do it, really.'
'I suppose so,' said Ambriel. 'Look, I will do the long jump as you asked. I'll work hard at it as well.'
'You honour me,' said Michael, and touched his brother's arm.
They chatted for a while, and had dinner, and it was a pleasant shmooze of an evening in Ambriel's Bethlehem abode, a pleasant further day in Eternya, the Eternal Terran Plain, of the Kingdom of God.
* * * * *
'So, Rose. How have you been?'
Rose looked at him from her divan. 'You took your time. Showin up. Do you know how many proposal's I have had?'
'I have two tickets,' said Jack. 'The Titanic is sailing again. In September. Will Rose become Rose Dorson by then?'
She smiled at him. He knew that smile.
* * * * *
Ambriel did well in the long jump. 2nd place to a Mongolian athlete. Michael's rowing team finished first. The Netball was officially drawn. Overall Britain edged Israel by 2 gold medals, claiming first place. USA were in third. Russia fourth and Mongolia fifth. The Athletic champions had emerged.
And, in time, as the other children of Destiny competed more effectively in various aspects of competition, the Great Eternal Terran Plain of Eternya, as this world was now known as, established its ways, and protocols and manners of life.
And the Children of Destiny sailed on into glory. And all was well. And all was well.
* * * * *
'Do you love me, Jack?' she asked.
'Pass the chips,' said Jack, and grinned.
That summed everything up, and Rose knew all was well in the world.
Stuck In Merriman
Alexander Darvanius was in Merriman, Nebraska, on a Saturday afternoon, on earth, in summer, on a bright and beautiful day. He was in Merriman Park, just across the road from the Merriman Dance Hall, with Haven Noahide Fellowship next door to the dance hall on its left.
'Val. You have a scientific mind,' said Alexander.
Val Fitch looked squarely at his friend. Fellow Merrimanite for a number of years now, Alexander was ever the one to ask penetrating questions, and had particularly grown fond of Val's own elucidated mind.
'You have a point, I take it,' responded Val.
'Every action has an opposite and equal reaction. It seems to be a fundamental of science I would have thought.'
'Supposedly,' responded Val. 'But life interferes, doesn't it Alexander.
'It has been known to,' responded Alexander.
They sipped on some of the moonshine they had brought with them, which they shouldn't have been drinking, but decided to anyway. A local lad had been eyeing the bottle suspiciously.
'Does not the creator have all things in his grasp?' queried Alexander. 'How can there be anything other than perfect order?'
'You are asking this to a nuclear physicist,' said Val.
'Whom I have researched,' said Alexander. 'You have quite a mind. Nobel prize winner. Not someone to be trifled with. But you postulate freedom, don't you. In our subatomic realities, there is decay, entropy, things don't always go according to plan. Do they?'
'Should they?' queried the scientist. 'Is life all a matchbox universe with no freedom of thought?'
'I postulated that once,' said Alexander,' and took a swig of moonshine.
They sat there, as people wandered by, and Alexander looked at the cars slowly gathering for the HNF meeting that evening on Creation Science.
'But is not God in control,' said Alexander.
'He appears to be,' smiled Val, and sipped on the moonshine.
'Then does he allow us that? Freedom? Choice? Something of our own simple ways?'
'And is that decay factor the work of our own incessant wills,' smiled Val. 'In thinking we know better than God.'
'I'll be stuck here in Merriman for a while, I think,' said Alexander. 'A Bowring family I plan on having many discussions with as well.'
'All according to the eternal plan,' smiled Val again.
'All according to the eternal plan.'
They chatted for a while, and Alexander remembered to leave behind just one bottle of moonshine.
Later that afternoon he noticed it had disappeared.
The youth of today, he muttered to himself.
4 O'Clock 11
It was 4 O'Clock in the morning. God was tired. It was too late for clubbing, and MTV had gone boring for the night. Nothing but 'The Cure' videos, and one of them repeated. Sure, it was a live performance of 'Why Can't I Be You', but God was naff of that.
He was bored.
It was at 29 Merriman Crescent Macarthur, walking up from his home in Alice Jackson Crescent, in the suburb of Gilmore in Tuggeranong in Canberra on Earth, the suburb adjacent to Macarthur, that God found his solace for the evening. Daniel Daly, Cherubim 347. A not oft visited Cherubim. Private lad. Counselled his wisdom to the world via Seraphim Daniel and Cherubim Callodyn, his offspring.
'What's up?' asked God, sitting down on the couch in the front room at 4:37, watching MTV. The Cure had shifted to 'Iron Maiden', which was an improvement on the 'Best of British'.
Daniel farted, and sat up, dazed. 'Huh? Who said that?'
God looked at his cherubim son. 'Haven't seen you in an eternity, Daniel.'
'Oh, you,' he said. The Cherubim got up, farted again, and said 'Excuse me,' and went off to the kitchen. Shortly he returned with two microwaved bowls of last night's dinner. Potatoes, fried chicken and broccolini. 'Here,' he said, offering God a plate. 'Chicken salt. Hope you like.'
God wolfed it down. It was very good.
'So, Daniel. What's the plan?'
'I'm retired from plans. I let the younglings do that glory.'
'Retired from plans, huh?' queried God.
'I have royalties. They play Chronicles movies every day now. We three Daniel's make ample money. I get by just on Earth Royalties from the movies on TV. Leave my universal takings to offspring, you know. Let the lawyers handle it.'
'Retirement mode, then.'
Daniel sat down on the sofa and looked at the TV. 'I know this one. Bruce is a pimpernel in this one. Check out those leotards.'
God chuckled on the lead singer of Iron Maiden's pants for a bit, and looked at a forlorn son. Hopeless. Not an ambition in the world.
'No passion left, then,' said God.
'I use it to get up in the morning. Over it by the time I do up my laces, you know. Ciggies. Breakfast. Backyard smoking all morning. Lunch. Maybe a bible passage, and then dinner, and maybe a visit to a girl in Fyshwick, and that's my daily. Got it all worked out.'
'Riveting stuff,' said God. 'No more passion? Sedate? All figured out.'
'You have any better ideas?' asked Daniel Daly.
'Live a little,' suggested God.
'I leave that...'
'To the younglings,' finished God. He eyed his son. Perhaps Daniel didn't care so much any more. Jaded. Had his fill of the grand adventure. Needed a recharge to remind him of the promises of life eternal.
'Any cricket ambitions?' he asked the Cherubim.
'Once. Saw record after record tumble, and the level of excellence reach impossible. Not for me. Played as a kid. Not that competitive.'
'You are, you know,' said God. 'Tragically. I remember your prayers.'
'Someones gotta pray. Only thing I was good at. And reading the bible.'
'Mmm,' said God.
'What? Do you have a better idea than the status quo? No women are interested. Never really have been. Marriage has been more luck than any charm. Not too many kids out there anyway. And my twin? She barely knows my name.'
'What is hers?' asked God.
Daniel looked at God for a moment. 'Um. Madonna, I think. Yeh, she's the one.'
'It's her daughter. Lourdes,' said God frankly.
'Oh. Fuck,' said Daniel. 'That's right. I get the two confused a lot. The older one made more of an impact.'
'Pretty hopeless, then. The sitch,' said God.
'Yep. The situation is pretty hopeless. So I've retired for an eternity, until they bring in indoor cricket to the mPower Dome down the road, and I can get a team together. Couldn't be bothered driving to Kambah to play the game.'
'That lazy,' said God.
'You know me,' said Daniel.
'Indeed,' finished God.
God watched the Best of British special roll on for a while.
'You have a page on my computer of personal records of over 25 pop rock songs which you have never put to music. As you know, copyright on new material expired a long time ago.'
'Yep. Sounds right,' said Daniel.
'Mmm. But all original complete song lyrics are entitled to have music to finish them off. You are now the officially last recorded person in creation with unfinished music. How about that?'
Daniel looked at God. 'Fascinating.'
'Do you want to do something about that?'
Daniel stared at him.
God whispered into his mobile phone. 'Riri.'
The front door opened, and Rihanna, putting out a cigarette, walked in. 'Hey Daniel,' she said. 'Will I do?'
Daniel looked at God. And he looked at Rihanna.
Then he laid down on the couch. 'Wake me in the morning. Make yourself at home.'
10 minutes later, as he was drowsing off. 'Music my butt,' he mumbled, and fell asleep.
God was in a good mood. Final works were now approaching.
A Surprising Harvest
Jenny Gilmore looked at the pictures. There she was 2 years old. Looking lovely. Of course, the family had no pictures of her under 2 years of age, because father didn't have the camera working at the time, which was a shame. A big shame. But Jenny had noticed something, just recently. Photos of Fiona. Around the time Jenny was supposed to be one year old. A big mystery.
She was out on the farm, on Dalgety, on earth, above the Great Terran plain, sitting out by the Snowy River, up on the banks, resting in nature. She did this, often, recycling as she liked to put it. Recycling life, now. Letting go of the old memories and experiences, for she had lived an eternity of them, and letting the new ones claim her soul. Letting the change in the weather refresh her each time and walk in the gentle flow of life. She thought of Daniel, these days, often. The Cherubim Callodyn was often on her mind, and she would walk along by the river, thinking of him, but he was usually caught up with his trio of women, and had little time for her. Seemed like that, these days. But he dropped by, still, over the centuries, said hell, drank tea with the family from their old teapot, and rested with the, in the beauty of Dalgety region. He had a farm, not far away, which he could occasionally be found at. She would sometimes borrow the motorbike, and ride out there, and sit on his porch, rocking the evening away on the rocker, hoping he would come home and surprise her. Sometimes he did. Mostly he didn't.
This was it, in a sense, now. Her eternal life. What God had perhaps chosen for the life of Jenny Gilmore. A quiet life, letting father do the work of the farm, old Steward, who provided for her still, even though she had shares and things. But he didn't mind, and she liked her dad providing, because she still hadn't nabbed the permanent mate of her own. And perhaps she never would. Maybe that was her lot in life. Maybe, deep down, that was what she wanted anyway. To be her daddy's girl, just like Fiona usually, living on the farm, the men showing up when the men needed to show up. And keeping it that simple.
Perhaps it was how it was meant to be.
* * * * *
'Dad. I have a question?'
'Yes Jenny,' said Stewart, not looking up from the 'Land' newspaper, over the quiet breakfast for two in their farm homestead, as Mother and Fiona were away on holiday.
'Dad. Why do we have photos of Fiona from one year old?'
'Oh. Oh, I took them sweetie. You know I love to take photos of you all.'
'But you didn't have a camera then?'
Stewart continued looking at his newspaper for a while and then, slowly, put it down. He stood, stretched himself, and went off to the loung room.
She came in some time later, and he was looking at a strange photo album, one she had never seen.
She sat down, and waited upon him.
Finally, he looked up at her. There were tears in her eyes.
'I'm your true father. Biologically in every way. But..............' he said, and passed her a photo. It was of her father and another lady, with a baby between them.
'Who's the child?' asked Jenny.
'That's no mum,' said Jenny. She looked at Stewart. He was still crying. 'That's NOT MUM!'
'But she is your mother,' said Stewart.
Jenny looked at him in unbelief, and looked at the photo.
'Who, who is she?'
'She lives in Bent street in Berridale now again. She lived opposite the Daly's breifly. Her name is Georgia Washington. She works, now...'
'At the post office in Berridale,' said Jenny.
'It's why we don't have photos of you. She took care of you until you were 18 months, and then we agreed I and your mother would raise you. We didn't want you to ever know. We were never going to tell you.'
Jenny looked at the photo, and at her old man, and stood, staring at him, and picked up the keys to the motorbike, ran out the back door, and left.
She didn't come back that evening.
* * * * *
'Wake up, sleepy head,' said Daniel.
Jenny woke up to the smell of freshly fried eggs and bacon, and all the rich lavishings Daniel always liked on his country breakfasts.
'Mmm, smells good,' said Jenny.
'Dig in,' said Daniel, as he served his current girlfriend.
'Will you be going back to the North Pole on Eternya soon?' she asked him.
'No time soon. Kayella has stuffed off to an old flame and asked me to disppear for a millennium or so. Wants some private time. Taylor and Katy are way to busy for me at the moment, so I came here.'
'Nothing better to do,' she said senstitively.
'Oh, plenty of things to do,' he said, smiling at her. 'But nothing as nice as this, anyway.'
She grinned at that. Always the charmer.
They sat, eating for a while, and then Jenny put the plate aside, took out the photo, and passed it to Daniel.
'So this is the photo, huh,' he said. 'What has got you all worked up.' He looked at it. 'Hey, I recognize her. Miss Washington. And your father. Weird. And a baby.' He looked at it for a while, and handed it back to Jenny, and then he looked at her. 'So why the fuss?'
'Look at the kid,' she said, and handed it back to him.
Daniel took the photo and looked it over. 'Cute kid, yeah. Looks familiar, you know.' Then he looked more closely. 'Hey, that slight birthmark on the forehead. It's just like yours.'
'And why do you think that is, Daniel?'
'Aw right, its you. Lovely. But so what?'
'The child is with its family,' said Jenny.
'Yep. That's old Stewart.'
'And its mother,' she said, taking the photo.
Daniel looked at her. 'But, but.'
'Go figure kemosabe.'
'Shit,' said Daniel.
'Exactly,' responded Jenny Gilmore.
* * * * *
'Well, hell Miss Gilmore. And Mr Daly. Good to see you,' said the Post office lady, Miss Washington.
'Georgia,' said Jenny. 'Have you seen this photo before?' she said, handing Georgia the photo. Georgia touched her mouth in shock for a moment, and then excused herself from the office.
They were in the cafe nearby.
'We had an agreement, Jenny. It would never come out. It was understood.'
Jenny looked at her mother, and suddenly noticed the resemblance. The same general features. The same smile, especially.
'What do we do now?' asked Jenny.
Daniel spoke up. 'Get sloshed. I have some schnaps at my place. Get pissed, get over it, and life just goes on, sweetie.'
'Very funny Daniel,' both ladies said as one.
Later on, when the three of them were quite inebriated back at Daniel's place, and most of the tears had finished for the evening, Daniel spoke up.
'If there is ever a surprising harvest, one which leaves you wondering just what God had in mind, this has been it?'
'Thanks, Dan,' said Jenny.
Georgia spoke up. 'Yes. I'm your mother. But remember she who raised you.'
Jenny nodded sombrely, looking into Georgia's eyes.
* * * * *
She was home, and Stewart and her mum had come home from church.
Jenny sat down with her, and her mother touched her forehead. 'You'll always be my Jenny Gilmore.'
And she always was.
4 O'Clock 12
Shadows of turning. Shadows of change. Shadows of New Beginning. And realities of final endings.
It was 4 O'Clock in the morning, and God was bored. It was too late for clubbing, so he headed over to 29 Merriman.
'So, Daniel. Do you have your glory all figured out?' he asked the 347th male cherubim of eternity.
Daniel Daly looked at God, and finally, responded.
'You know, old man. I have lived a hell of a life. I've seen fire, and I've seen rain. I've walked a mile or two, and known a girl or three, or even four. And in all that time, I never really worried that much about whatever will be. Sure, life has its uncanny moments, and unexpected twists and turns. It has plenty of mistakes to make within it, and plenty of good choices and sensible decisions as well, to give us glory. But, again, in all of that, I never really worried. And do you know why that is?'
God smiled at young Daniel. 'And why is that young Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly?'
'Coz life goes on, old man. Life goes on.'
God sat down next to Daniel, put his heavy arms around his young son, and said, 'Now ain't that the truth. Now lets watch some porn.'
And they did.
And it was good.
4 O'Clock 13
God was bored. It was 4 O'Clock in the Morning. He turned on TV.
Surafel was on TV – Singing with his twin Zelophadel. Surafel was the 25th Seraphim Angel of Eternity, the rap singer Kanye West, twin to Zelophadel, the celebrity Kim Kardashian. They always made a good couple, God thought. He turned on to ROE TV. You got that on earth now – one channel here in Canberra. Kardos and Belladear, the 258th Cherubim of Eternity, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, were doing some humourous sketches in 'Twilight Comedy Hour'. Twilight had been lived by them in the multiverse of Saruviel, a destiny foretold in the work of the author Stephenie Meyer, who Destiny had inspired, like Ms Rowling, to undertake her enormous work. God liked how everything came together in the end in Destiny's clever machinations. He listened to 5 minutes of vampire jokes, and turned the TV off. He was bored.
He liked his life in Alice Jackson crescent in Gilmore, were he was the Chief Pastor of the Head Universal Faith Assembly of the Seven Divine Fellowships of Karaite Adamide-Noahide faith. Gilmore was the foundational seat of the UFA, and God had fitted into the role, after meeting one of the Daniel's in Springvale, were he had been born, who had suggested to him that he might fit into this particular role. God had accepted, and it was his primary work in his theophanic form. Melanie C was the 'Queen' of the fellowship, as it was put, and she occasionally visited God, the 34th female Cherubim of the Realm of Eternity being a constant support of friendship to himself, as she understood Daniel the Seraphim well, who was always an ego he had to keep in check. The Seven Divine Fellowships were the primary Karaite Noahide assembly, part of God's religions, those ones being primarily the Adamide-Noahide faith and Judaism. They were the spokes of faith he personally represented, and had argued with Jesus and the other iconoclasts, through his mediators, a long time for them to ultimately get the point. But Jesus had been addressed not long ago, and the Soldiers of Love were still about their work, a new agenda for Jesus, one he now seemed content with.
He was bored.
He took out a scrapbook, and looked through some recent memories. A picture with himself and Wormdog in Parallel, which he always enjoyed looking at. His bestie, for the most part. Another picture of him and Riri, which always mad him smile. Memories. Mostly more recent, for the older scrapbooks were kept at Home, in the deep recesses of his personal archives. His private sanctuary.
God was bored. But he was content. And happy.
Enough life had been created, now, and he had enough things to do with all his wonderful children and worlds. And while he said to himself he was bored, he wasn't really. He just liked to keep busy for now, and liked to be on the go, because he had boundless energy. Life was good, and he enjoyed his life, and wanted nothing more. He had the troublesome children, which he loved for their own sakes, and that, in the end, was the way it was meant to be. He had a decent wife, decent friends and family and, all things considered, he was content.
But he was bored. So he went to the fridge, picked out a Almond Magnum ice cream, started eating it, and loaded up Road Rash II on the Megadrive. Callodyn's addiction to the game had finally started rubbing off, and he cruised along, no longer quite so bored, enjoying his ice cream, slowly getting tired, as 5 approached, and the sandman of dreams beckoned once more for his piece of God's time.
Life was good.
Kantriel and Shantriel
Orlando Bloom sat on the steps of the London Amphitheatre of England, just south of the North Pole of the Great Eternal Terran Plain of Eternya. Earth had been reproduce again, cascading outwards from the Central Hub of the North Pole, which was the centre of Eternya. At the limits of Earth, Antarctica, the southern pole continent, ran around the entire earth as a circle, and then, beyond this, the new lands and dominions. This earth, though, was much larger in scope than the earth planet up above them, huge, in fact, in comparison, but limited in the end as well. It was beyond the Antarctican ice border that the real Eternya, in a sense, began, hundreds and thousands and millions of new frontiers, all being gradually settled, in a universe of a plain which went on forever. But the North Pole was the hub, and Orlando currently lived there in a flat from time to time, but mostly resided in Belfast of Northern Ireland of the Great Eternal Plain, were he had been welcomed as a princely administrator, a place he felt home. A place he liked. His twin, Shantriel, the model Miranda Kerr, lived in Australia on the Great Eternal Plain, and they shared children together, and he saw her from time to time, but they were not married at this moment. But right at this very moment she sat on the steps, a few yards beneath him, eating a sandwich, looking beautiful as always. Daraqel, the singer Chris Daughtry, 24th Male Seraphim of the Realm of Eternity, his long time friend of the trio of themselves and Saruviel, sat next to her, and they were chatting about life, Shantriel occasionally looking up at Kantriel who was in a world of his own.
Saruviel had said some things recently. Challenging things. Could it ever be any other way. 'Life is what we make it, Kanty. Why would we want to make it boring. Let's challenge them all, and live a little. Nothing to radical, as all of that is behind me, but why should we make it so damn easy for everyone.' Kantriel was considering that and, seriously, why the hell not. May as well live a little.
'Sweetie. Chris has to go,' so are we going to the Millennium Wheel?'
'Ok,' said Orlando.
London was bright below them, as the ferris wheel ran through the sky, and they were taken to the top were it stopped for a while.
'Are you happy,' she asked him.
'As happy as I could be. Saruviel has some new ideas. He never lets go of the zest of it all.'
'That's what you like about him, though. Isn't it? The angel of action. Kalphon's greatest son.'
'I suppose,' he said. 'Life could be pretty boring with out old triple 6.'
'So be happy with that,' she said, and took his hand and kissed it.
They sat there, looking out at the beautiful night of London Town, and Kantriel lost his thoughts for a while, and sat there, with his twin, a happy angel. A happy Seraphim. And even the machinations of Dread Lord Saruviel could not persuade him from enjoying himself tonight, as he sat with the prettiest girl in the world, looking out over a beautiful city of God.
Stuck in Tinderry
'Nah, its stuffed,' said Ambriel.
Daniel the Seraphim looked at the engine of the SVU. 'Yeh, it looks it.'
Daniel walked to the backseat window and looked in on Rebecca St James – the angel Meludiel – and the angel Jacob Fink, her current boyfriend. 'It's stuffed. We'll have to camp here tonight. It's late, and we didn't bring our mobiles as agreed, remember.'
'Ok,' said Jacob.
The four of them started unpacking. They were on Eternya, in Australia, south of Canberra, up near the Tinderry ranges just off the road from Michelago. It was quiet. There were limited population rights for this area, deemed a place of 'Escape' and 'Nature getaway'.
Ambriel got a fireplace going, and when they had got the picnic bag out, they started drinking 'Peach Glory', which was a cocktail Daniel produced, peach ice tea mixed with peach schnappz, something one of his companies produced as a drink in a bottle of low alcohol content, alcho pop as they were known as.
As the night wore on, Meludiel snuggled up close to Jacob, and the four of them had their sleeping bags wrapped tightly around them, as they stared into the fire.
'I have a scary story,' said Daniel, mildly intoxicated. 'Ambriel's underwear.'
The four of them laughed.
Ambriel spoke up. 'I have an even scarier story. Daniel's hygiene.'
The four of them laughed again.
'Well I have the scariest story of them all,' said Rebecca. 'Michael's current curry fixation and divine side product.'
'He does stink, doesn't he,' said Ambriel.
'Oh, the man pongs vilely,' said Daniel.
'Yep, firstborn,' said Ambriel. 'My big brother. Marries an Indian wife, and he's never smelt the same again.'
'Someone should tell him,' said Meludiel.
'I think he knows,' said Jacob. 'But doesn't care. Privileges of his esteemed birthright.'
'But he likes the curried eggs as well,' said Ambriel.
'And doesn't mind showing it,' said Daniel, pinching his nose.
'Michael is our big brother, and we must forgive his digestive abilities,' said Meludiel.
'Or lack thereof,' said Daniel.
'Or lack thereof,' agreed Meludiel.
They chatted on that night, gradually each drifting off, and later, as Daniel settled down in his bag, looking up at the sky stars, next to him Ambriel started farting a bit, the smell of the peach coming through quite strongly.
'And I thought Michael was bad,' said Daniel to himself, as he snuggled down for the night.
Ambriel's wind get him up for a while though. Finally, frustrated, he moved away, closer to Jacob.
'Aaargh, Meludiel. Keep on doing that babe,' said Jacob, suddenly talking in his sleep.
Daniel didn't get much sleep that night. The following morning He let them know just exactly what he thought of them. Meludiel tried consoling him. An argument broke out, and Jacob and Ambriel were soon wrestling Daniel.
'Boys,' thought Meludiel to herself. But she watched on, entertained, none the less.
Later on, Meludiel was off the campsite a little, and Daniel was sitting with her, in a bit of the bush, listening and relaxing.
'You know, Mel,' said Daniel. 'It's like that, isn't it?'
Meludiel turned to her beloved. 'What is like that?'
'Life,' he said, smiling.
She looked at him, and returned her gaze to the bush. 'And what is life like?' she asked him.
'Full of mystery. Take the Seraphim Angel Meludiel for example. Here she is, 3 boyfriends chasing her madly, and she goes and chooses a lowly placed Cherubim to be the victor.'
Meludiel smiled at Daniel's comment.
'I mean, come on. A Cherubim? They have as much imagination as Michael's farts.'
'I take it you are not impressed,' she responded with a grin.
'Hardly. I mean, despite his flaws, and believe me I could write volumes, Ambriel does have a sort of charm associated with it. A dorky, nerdy, very jewish, and totally incompetent charm, but yeh. He has a bit about him. And he's a seraphim.'
'And my twin,' she said, still smiling.
'Yep. God only knows the wisdom in that, but yeh. But Jacob Fink? You can do better than that.'
'Jacob is all true gentlemanly charm,' she responded. 'Unlike some,' she said snidely.
'Jacob Fink. More like Jacob Stink,' said Daniel.
'I heard that,' yelled Jacob from the campsite not far away.
'Bite me,' yelled Daniel at him. 'So you see, Mel. Me and Ambs. We're not imprssed.'
By the fireplace Ambriel was grinning at Jacob who was just shaking his head.
'I happen to love Jacob Fink very much,' said Meludiel.
'If you were not one of the sweetest angels in existence, I could hardly forgive you for that comment,' said Daniel, the growing grin on his face quite apparent. But Jacob Fink? Jesus.'
Ambriel said to Jacob. 'Oh, bro. Your great. Daniel doesn't speak for me.'
'Wuss,' yelled Daniel to Ambriel.
'I am sure you will learn to appreciate Jacob's fine qualities in time,' said Meludiel forthrightly.
'Yep,' said Daniel. 'When pig's fly.'
Meludiel took it with good humour. She was well used to Daniel by now.
Later still, Meludiel and Ambriel were on the other side of the campsite, their time together and Ambriel started speaking.
'You know, Meludiel. When it all comes down to it, how the hell could an angel like Daniel the Seraphim impress you?'
Jacob was grinning at Daniel by the fireplace, who was just shaking his head.
'I mean, he is devoid of talent, has the charm of a vampire, and smells worse than skunk poo.'
'Daniel has his charms,' said Meludiel.
'Unlike some,' yelled Daniel at Ambriel.
'God alone knows the wisdom in your fondness for such an infidel,' smiled Ambriel.
Meludiel got up and hugged Ambriel. 'Don't worry jealous. My heart has plenty of room for you.'
And later still, Jacob and Meludiel were together, and Jacob started speaking.
'You know, I must commend you for your taste in men,' said Jacob to Meludiel.
Meludiel smiled warmly at that.
'Ambriel is a first class fellow and that Daniel? Words can not describe how impressed I am with his magnanimous chivalry. Beyond belief, literally.'
By the fire Daniel was looking at Ambriel. Ambriel spoke up. 'So he gets the girl. Perhaps we should take the hint.'
'All smooth talk. She'll see through him in the end,' responded Daniel.
'I heard that,' yelled Jacob at Daniel. Daniel grinned.
'But seriously, Mel. They are wonderful guys. My world is all the better for them being in my life.'
'Oh, Jacob. You are the special one aren't you,' said Meludiel, and hugged him.
By the fireplace Daniel said to Ambriel, 'Good on you. Let's go camping with Jacob and Rebecca. It will be great. We'll all get along you said. Bloody wonderful.'
'Some words are hard to bear,' said Ambriel, taking it in all humility.
Later that afternoon, Ambriel and Daniel had dared each other to climb down the rocks on the Tinderry ranges which overlooked Michelago to the west. But they both slipped and landed in an awkward place.
'We just fly out,' said Ambriel.
Daniel looked squarely at his brother. 'Remember the rules. Only in an emergency. God expects us to deal with these kind of things in the Earthly worlds.'
'What do we do, then? We can't stay here. We'll die of thirst.'
'We're getting our lesson on pride,' said Daniel soberly.
'We should repent,' said Ambriel.
Up above Rebecca yelled down. 'I'll get the rope from the SVU.'
'Take your time,' yelled Daniel. 'We need to learn a lesson I think.'
Later that evening Jacob appeared, and threw down the rope and the two angels climbed back up. They both looked at Jacob, humbled.
On the drive back to Canberra the following morning nobody spoke much. Daniel and Ambriel were both lost in thoughts. Thoughts about their words, and their humour, and who Meludiel had in fact chosen to be with at the current moment in time.
And both had reached conclusions of sorts of the message being sent.
Both had worked something out.
Monkeyman to the Rescue 2
Callodyn and Taylor were having a game of scrabble. The most boring game in the world, according to Taylor, although she was killing Cal at it.
'I am sure you are bored with it,' said Callodyn. 'You have demolished me 15 times in a row.'
'It's your Daly genes,' she replied. 'Low IQ. Ambriel assured me of that. Low IQ.'
Callodyn glared at her. 'Listen, string bean, when it comes to the IQ jokes in this family, I tell them kapiche?'
'Yes, Lord Antichrist,' she responded.
'Good,' he said. 'Now how about chess?'
Taylor proceeded to put the scrabble tiles back in the plastic box, and picked out 7 new tiles.
'Again?' moaned Daniel.
'Come on, Genius,' she said. 'Let's see what you are made of.'
'Grrr,' said Callodyn.
Monkey man spoke up. 'Master. Isn't today the day Taylor promised to clean the house for you? It was an arrangement you made a few weeks back. If she had some free time she could tidy up a little.'
'Oh,' said Taylor, glaring at Callodyn and Monkeyman. 'I can't believe you are holding me to an off the cuff comment like that. I was just being kind.'
Callodyn looked down at the scrabble tiles. 4 A's and 3 S's. It was not his day. Suddenly, 'Yes Monkeyman. I do seem to recall that Taylor oathed such words on the grave of her dead grandmother.'
'Oh, Jesus Christ!' swore Taylor. 'Grandmother my butt.'
'And that, should she fail to do a proper job, her services in the bedroom that evening would be available to the extent of my mind's delight.'
'I said no such thing, Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly the IV. You are FIBBING!' exclaimed Taylor resolutely.