Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
STORIES for Volume One
The Universal Angel (Short Story)
Falling into Grace (Short Story)
Melanie and Daniel (Short Novella)
Daniel and Abraham (Short Story)
Dario and Andrew – Two Clowns at a Circus (Short Story)
Master Radcliffe and the 7 Epochs of the Shadow Wars (Short Story)
Melanie’s Dilemma (Short Story)
Melanie and Bag Man and an Undying Love (Short Story)
The Dark Sound of Chaos (Short Story)
Master Radcliffe’s Lazy Sunday Afternoon (Short Story)
Melanie and Daniel 2 (Novella)
Melanie and Daniel 3 (Novella)
Rest In Peace (Short Story)
The Universal Angel
(All stories in this saga written and dedicated to the singer Melanie Chisholm)
Raphael looked at the orange. It looked tasty. Tasty and refreshing. But his will was absolute – totally and utterly committed – and he would not relent from the challenge posited to him by the lord of darkness.
He looked at his watch. 3 hours to go. His throat was, perhaps, drier than the Sahara on the hottest of summer days, and his stomach was in agony. 4 days straight without any water and he was nearly dead. And the orange, sitting on the table in front of him, the lord of darknesses required temptation for the challenge, never looked so appealing.
But so much was at stake – so much at stake. 14 million years of service to Satan’s throne of darkness versus 14 million to his own. The challenge had been so tempting, and the agreement watertight, that how could the firstborn son of God truly refuse? How could he ever look his angelic community in the eyes again should he have not taken such an opportunity. Of course, he would rule, then. He would rule the universe – the entire known and inhabited universe, should he accomplish the challenge of the lord of evil. And in the glory that would be his – in the glory that would be practically eternal – he could bring to life the ways and beauties of the most high, especially to those who had never tasted such graces. He could not fail – whatever else, he could not fail.
* * * * *
Daranok looked through the screen at the enemy, Satan standing beside him. ‘He’s fucked. He has got be fucked. I mean, he has got to be fucked.’ Satan said nothing, but just stared at the slumped figure of Raphael on the floor, hoping his ancient adversary had indeed passed on to Sheol. Gabriel, standing beside him, looked at the clock. ’30 seconds to go,’ he said to the other two. Satan gave no reaction. And then, the chime going off, Gabriel rushed in with a pitcher of ice water, hoping against hope that his older brother had indeed survived the ultimate challenge.
* * * * *
After 4 months in hospital, having received a healthy number of visitors, Raphael had the slightest of grins on his face. He was a little happy now – just a little happy. He would be back to work soon, back in the highest most diamond city of the realm of wonder, God’s heavenly domain. But it would be different work, now. Most definitely different. For he had already sensed it – sensed it in his spirit. The withdrawal had taken place, and the darkness, the evil, had submitted and surrendered. For Satan, despite the evil of countless generations practiced, was still an angel dedicated to honouring a divine contract. And in the 14 million years of light ahead of the Realm of Wonder, Raphael looked pleasantly forward to all the divine opportunities he had available to him with his malevolent, diabolical opponent. And then he smiled.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
“Falling into Grace”
Satan. It was a name, once, not long ago that, when spoken amongst the heavenly diamond cities of the Realm of Glory, brought fear and worry. But that was then. That was then. Because now, three hundred years since a certain wager had been decided, a wager between the higher powers of the Realm, a wager in which Satan tasted his once held vice of being humbled under the powers of the Sovereign One, that name was now tossed around casually, if at all bothering to be spoken, as one of the most laughed upon and derided members of the eternal realm. For Satan, truly fallen from grace of the position of Adversary to Archangel Raphael, the Devil himself, these days, in honouring the terms of the contract upon his defeat, swept city streets, cleaned toilets, and dealt with sewerage on a regular basis. And not exactly in the best of positions either amongst the regular other workers in such an occupation – in no way indeed. For Satan was the general dog’s body. If there was a crappy job, Satan was your man: In fact, the crappier the better as far as some people were concerned, and in the long held spirit of vengeful revenge held by the citizens of the realm upon their ancient adversary, going out of their way to find really horrible jobs was almost deemed a pleasant undertaking.
Satan himself, at first, didn’t really mind. He felt that Raphael was probably just having a go at him and reminding him of his past sins. But after the first few years had passed, with no sign of relief at hand, Satan gradually sank further and further into misery at his lowly position in life. And now, three hundred years after being treated as the butt joke of so many, Satan was miserable. Life fucking sucked.
His pay was total crap. Fifty bucks a week. So crappy, in fact, that he couldn’t afford to rent anywhere or share a group house and, having purchased a tent, he lived in a park, near a toilet, and made do with that. The toilet had a tap with running water which he would clean himself with, and was able to shit there, naturally. The cops occasionally hassled him, letting him know people were often offended by his presence in a place they liked to recreate in, but they would eventually leave him alone as his claim that he had nowhere else to go usually softened their hearts just enough for them to snigger a little and move on.
He usually spent the Fifty bucks on food and drink. It was enough to cover basic meals, and occasionally he would buy a hamburger and a coke, which he liked. His work overalls were provided, alongside his shoes, so he didn’t have to buy any extra clothing, but had a few jeans and t-shirts he would wear in his free time.
Unfortunately his demonic entourage had abandoned him, now calling him a total loser. And, as such, really nobody gave a fuck about him anymore. Nobody at all, just about, apart from Raphael who would visit him nearly every first day of the month. But all Raphael would do was lecture him on his past sins, and remind him that he was his pawn for 14 million years. And then he would laugh at Satan and call him ‘Sucker’.
All of this had been getting to Satan and now, three hundred years into his sentence, he finally started crying at nights. No, in no way tears of repentance of past sin, but tears of sorrow. He’d had enough. Really, he had had fucking enough. God was still the fucking bastard he had always maintained he was, but Satan had finally realized what he had always feared – God was a sovereign cunt and, in the end, he could get you back for your sins, and in a way which really would rub it in.
So, the current state of Satan, adversary of God, in the Realm of Eternal Glory one fine Sunday morning, was misery. Total misery. And that is when a new person came into the life of the master of evil.
The Celestyel Angel Melanie was a very attractive angel. Very pretty. And also very talented at music, singing extremely well. She’d had good chart success, had a large number of fans on ‘rww.heavenspace.heav’ and, all things considered, happy enough with everything in life. Yes, generally happy enough, apart from the minor problem of having no boyfriend. You see, no man had yet touched her, somewhat daunted by her looks and star status. This didn’t really bother Melanie, but she yearned for the touch of a guy, and to enjoy that forbidden fruit so many of her female angelic sisters all talked about. ‘Perhaps one day,’ she thought to herself. ‘Perhaps one day.’
Today was Sunday, and after attending Assembly that morning, hearing a familiar sermon on the virtues of godly living, Melanie had decided to visit a nearby park and have a quiet picnic by herself, watching the swans and enjoying life. She packed a picnic bag full of fried chicken, cola, water, apple juice, fruit salad, and some crisps. And, packing the bag into the back of her car, tossing the rug in, Melanie smiled to herself at the happiness she would have with a quiet day to herself, out in the sun.
Arriving at the park, she pulled up into a carpark, stopped the car, and got her bag and rug. Walking onto the park-grounds, she looked around, noting it was quiet today, and only seeing the bag man over by the toilets were he lived. She called him the ‘Bag Man’ as she didn’t know his name and had never introduced herself. She was silently puzzled why he lived in the park. As far as she knew everyone in the Realm had a good income and could afford to live in at least a nice unit. But this guy lived in the park for reasons known only to himself. ‘I guess he must like the lifestyle,’ was her only conclusion.
She reached the centre of the park were the pond was, placed her rug near the edge, opened her picnic bag and began her feast. The chicken tasted good and as she sat chewing on a wing, looking around, she again noticed the bag man over near the toilet. He looked as if he was reading something. ‘Probably not much else to do,’ she thought to herself.
Drinking her apple juice she looked at the still waters of the pond. The swans glided, seemingly effortlessly over the surface, busily engaged in the things swans occupied themselves with. She wondered to herself what it would be like to be a swan. To be free, with no cares, no responsibilities. It must be the easy life, she thought, and in some ways she envied them. But, no, she wouldn’t swap her glory for the life of a swan, no matter how effortlessly they swam over the water. Taking a bread roll from her picnic bag she picked off little pieces and threw them at the swans, who swam over and started eating them. It was so relaxing, and peaceful. So idyllic that, really, life couldn’t get any better.
Sitting there, watching the day pass, Melanie thought on her recent life. The new album was doing really well now. It had peaked at number 11 on the Realm charts, her highest position ever, and the first single had got to number 8. She was possibly at her peak, and she knew it, but things were hopefully still looking up. ‘Just stay committed,’ she constantly reminded herself. Her mother had visited her recently, talking her usual stories, fussing her usual way. But that was mum. Really, like her to fuss. But Melanie knew she cared and was grateful because of it. And sitting there, thinking how nice it was of her mother to care for her, she reminded herself that, as an Angel of God, so should she care. Care enough to help people, when they were down, and to give a damn, even about the most despondent of souls.
Suddenly she needed to relieve herself and, rising, made her way over to the toilets. She noticed again the bag man reading his book, wondering what it was, then went into the ladies toilet to be about her business. Coming out she looked at the bag man and thought to herself what she had just been thinking on. ‘Care’. She was supposed to care. And perhaps, just perhaps, Bag man needed a friend. Someone to talk to, to chat with. Someone to be there for him when perhaps others had given up and forsaken his life. So, thinking it a good idea, she carefully approached and introduced herself.
‘Uh, hi. I’m Mel.’
Satan looked up at her, looked at her happy face, almost wanted to smile, but looked back down at his book and continued reading.’
She thought about that but decided to persevere. ‘Do you mind if I sit down? She asked. He said nothing so, assuming he really didn’t mind, sat down opposite him. She looked around. ‘Nice day, isn’t it?’ Still no reply. ‘What are you reading?’
This time he reacted, holding the cover of the book to her. It was a standard ‘Realm Bible’.
‘Oh.’ She said. ‘So you are spiritual?’ But he said nothing.
She looked at him, a little frustrated at the lack of response, but decided enough was enough. If he really didn’t want to speak, perhaps it was best not to bother him. She stood up, looked at him, and said, ‘Well, Seeya around, perhaps.’ And giving him a last look walked off, wondering just what was going on in his head.
* * * * *
Melanie was lying on her back on her double bed, staring up at the ceiling. She had earphones on and was listening to her CD walkman. ‘The other side of life, where the wolves and jackal’s play, where the darkness has its might, where the sinners have their say. The other side of life, is a place where love is lost, where the price of life is high, where that price comes at a cost.’ Those lyrics Melanie had heard many times. They were a spiritual band, ‘The Light Crusaders’, and they were an inspiration to Melanie, especially at times when she bemoaned her virginity and their lyrics encouraged purity. She would mate one day. She knew that. She did not really know who with, but she was sure it would be the right one when she found him. She was sure of that.
She thought on ‘Bag Man’. Perhaps, living out there in that wilderness, away from a softer feminine touch, he could be lonely. Very lonely, despondent even. Fed up with it all, and even crying at night. And, thinking that, she suddenly felt for his heart and how bad he could be feeling. And suddenly, overcome with a desire to help him in some way, she got up from her bed, went to her kitchen and filled a picnic bag with various food items, and grabbed some books and little puzzle games, and left her apartment, heading for the park.
* * * * *
‘Yes, diamonds are the hardest substance. So our cities are the hardest cities in creation. Throughout all the Realms of Existence, it is our cities which are the hardest. The strongest. And, with the beauty of diamonds, the most glorious. And hopefully the most valuable.’
‘That is interesting,’ responded Melanie to Bag Man’s wisdom.
‘Of course, very few appreciate what we have, and few understand how important it is to maintain our glory and improve upon it. Raphael is a fool. A foolish angel. He lets angels carry on their own lives as they see fit, doing practically whatever they want, as long as they comply with the law. I mean, that is insane. Totally insane. People have so much inner talent and capabilities that they need a strong, determined leader. A leader who can get the best out of them. Not let them be so slack and second rate.’
‘And you are that leader, are you?’
‘Hey, I was born for that. I am the greatest there ever has been, and the greatest there ever will be. I really am the God of glory, you know. The God of glory.’
Melanie nodded, but kept her opinion to herself. Bag man, it seemed, was quite an intense individual. He seemed to have a very strong sense of self worth and self capability, but she questioned just how much reality he had taken in. Just how aware he was of the way things were. The way it was.
‘And how will you achieve your glory?’ she asked him.
He looked at her for a moment, as if thinking about that, then looked down. ‘I don’t know. I almost had it, but it was taken from me. And now life sucks. But I will get the glory one day. I will, you hear me. I will. It is just a matter of time.’
‘I believe you.’
He looked up at her, a sincere look on his face. ‘You do?’
‘Uh, thanks. Good to have a follower.’
They chatted on for a while longer, sharing a meal and watching the day pass by. Melanie give him a Rubik’s cube and some other puzzles and finally, feeling she had done her good deed, bid him farewell and returned home.
* * * * *
Daniel thought it over. Yes. Yes, it was the right time to move. The right time to move. Melanie had finally given him her address after all his years of adoring emails and, while he was devoted to a number of girls in his heart, Melanie was one right near the top of the list. Yes, he would lock up his mansion and start again in the new Diamond city, only taking his bare essentials and his bank account details.
Daniel had been a fan of Melanie’s music for centuries now. She was, in his heart, exactly the type of girl he desired an eternal relationship with. And perseverance was definitely the call of the day to hopefully attract her attention and win her heart. There was no real other way in the end.
* * * * *
‘Of course, the Dragon is the most powerful of all God’s creatures. And I am a Dragon, Melanie. I am a grand and glorious Red Dragon, the most feared of all God’s creatures.’
Melanie listened intently as Bag Man continued with his rhetoric. ‘You sound like Satan himself,’ responded Melanie.
‘Well why wouldn’t I?’
She looked at him closely, looking closely at his face, and then noticed it. Despite the grime and dirt which he had been covered with, and the filthy beard he was wearing, yes, it was him. She recognized him now. It was Satan. Satan himself.
‘Uh, fuck. Um. Sorry, I have got to go.’ She quickly got to her feet, alarmed at the company she was in, and hurried off, not turning her back. Satan was not someone to tangle with. Definitely not someone to tangle with at all.
* * * * *
Satan looked at the chapter. It was the Christian Bible he had picked up, just for a change. Something different to read rather than his standard texts. And he was looking at 1 Corinthians chapter 13. He looked at it, thought on Melanie, and thought it would be nice to have that sort of love with a lady, perhaps someone like Melanie, or some other love. It would be nice. And it would be especially nice to have a home to live in with such a lady – a home with servants, and nice cutlery, and a new car, and vacuum cleaners and happy children, and everything fine and dandy. It would be nice. But, of course, he had never married. Never had any children. Never gotten around to it. He had been preoccupied with his position of power in the Realm and had never quite been able to find that female relationship, apart from the prostitutes, which could have satisfied such urges. But, well, it would be nice, he thought to himself. It would be nice.
* * * * *
Melanie thought on the sermon she heard that morning. ‘Falling into the Grace of God’ meant accepting, in the end, our frailties and weaknesses. And accepting them in others. And then, because of that, accepting them for all that they really could be anyway. And, without that Grace. Without that Grace which accepted people and didn’t try to exalt itself in pride against them, which didn’t ridicule or belittle them as if they were nothing. Without that Grace of God which, when in the end you realized you needed so much anyway, how could you really find in your own heart anything worth calling yourself ‘Angelic’ for anyway? If you could not show that Grace, the Grace you yourself relied upon, how could you look in the mirror and be pleased with the picture you saw. How could you.
She would go back in a few days. Back to the park and speak with Bag Man again. She would try again, trying not to judge him. Trying to accept him as he was and realize he was how God had made him and how he wanted to be. And, as worthy as any other of God’s children, he was worthy of kindness and love, just as she herself was.
* * * * *
Daniel looked at the flat. It was on the second storey, but looked quite spiffy, and the rental price was quite affordable. He would look inside but, if everything was ok, this one would do. It was close to Melanie and in a suitable location. Really, it was ideal.
* * * * *
‘Yeh. I guess so Melanie. I guess so.’
‘That is why I work hard to get along with people. To try and be accepted by them. That is why I do it.’
‘But shouldn’t you just try and be yourself in the end?’
‘I am being myself. That is part of my self expression – caring about the opinions and hearts of other people. Caring for them and what they want and expect from me. In a way it is part of service – serving the community. Remember what Jesus said: He who will be greatest amongst you must be servant of all. Remember that.’
‘Jesus, huh. Yeh, I have been studying his stuff recently. He was a reasonable thinker. Deep on some issues, confused on some others. He was ok.’
‘I think he is brilliant.’
‘Maybe. A bit of a heretic towards his people’s religion, though, don’t you think?’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’
‘They crucified him. I mean, he didn’t exactly get along with the Rabbis like you think is so important, did he?’
She considered that. ‘Interesting point, I guess. But the New Testament explains that. God moved on from a stubborn child to people who would listen to the message of truth. People who had grown up. People chosen by God from the foundation of the world.’
‘Yes, Satan. Predestination.’
‘And what of the Revelation? I don’t recall any of that coming to pass.’
She looked at him, considering her response. It was a good point he had raised. And then she decided to respond. ‘Well, you are stuck here for 14 Million Years, aren’t you?’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’ he asked, suddenly taken aback.
‘Well it sounds like the Ages of Ages to me.’
‘Never mind. Well, I have to be going – things to do. But I will be back tomorrow, k. See you then.’
‘Yeh, ok. See you then.’
She left him then, returning to her car, and her mind starting to think a little over his words about Jesus. Perhaps they were pertinent points. Certainly some food for thought.
* * * * *
Melanie and Satan developed a relationship over those few years she visited him. It was a relationship of friendliness, Melanie doing her best to show Satan the grace she knew God desired her to. And she hoped Satan realized she cared about him, even if not romantically interested.
Eventually, though, she started visiting him less and less, satisfied that she had, to a degree, done her good deed. He was not the one for her, if that had ever been a consideration, so for now she would remain virginal. Whoever the man was to tame her wild heart, well time would tell on that. Time would definitely tell on that. But for now life went on for the angel Melanie and only the future could guess just what would happen next.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
“Melanie and Daniel”
If 4 years with Satan had taught Melanie anything it was that without a heart which showed grace – without a heart which showed tolerance, acceptance and mercy - only judgementalism would arise and, in that spirit of judgementalism, when placed upon an individual in the pride of heart which renders irrevocable judgements of hatred, criticism and mockery, such pride would eventually be found out and undone by the glory God would give to the one abased in such eyes. For Melanie knew a truth – a truth she had learned which she now held sacred - ‘What am I, really?’ Melanie thought to herself. I know I am pretty. I know I am talented. I know I am popular. But where have I come from? And where am I going? And what does the future hold for me? I know, once, when I was a child, I had immature ways. I smoked often, and would curse from time to time. And while I often justified my vengeance, as I grew I came to realize that such ways just don’t work as well in the end as kindness and friendliness. For a heart which shows hatred and pride towards another heart, inevitably in my experience, just calls itself a snob. It feels as if it has all these great values, but looks at the way it treats people and ends up saying ‘Well what makes me so great? Aren’t I just a nasty bitch which people don’t always like anyway?’ And then, in my experience through life, I have watched some of those I derided. And I have learned this lesson – this inevitably true lesson. So many people – so many people who have chosen good over evil, even in the absolute crappy way I once viewed them – so many of them, even slowly mind you, but so many of them start gradually and carefully improving. And, after time, I notice some of those I once derided so greatly – some of them are now quite nice people. They dress a bit better, smile a bit more, speak a little more softly and display a bit more talent. And while once I derided so many people as ‘Try Hards’ I have noticed them getting better and better. For it is a truth I have learned. It was a song – I song I heard about one of those Christian artists. I forget her name, now. But I liked her in my youth. It had a line which went ‘We’re all just diamonds in the rough, but we love because he first loved us.’ So all of us are diamonds – diamonds in the rough. We have unpleasant bits. Crude bits. Nasty bits. We can mock, deride and hate. We can insult, hurt and even fight. But we are not finished yet. We have not yet arrived at were we are going or were we are supposed to be. And perhaps we will never reach the end of that destination. But as we journey along the road – as we venture further along the walk of life – we, putting it simply, grow up. And we learn better values. Values we had not really known in younger years. Values which show just how juvenile or stupid earlier ways of thinking really were. And I have noticed, many people slowly and gradually learn these values, and the earlier ones too. So, well, what I am saying to myself is this. Why judge someone so harshly. Why be so hard on someone, so insistent on pointing out their faults or shortcomings. For they may well get there eventually on what you perceive as weaknesses or faults. And this thinking permeated the mind and heart of Melanie for so long that, when she finally parted from the romantic relationship she’d had with Satan, a relationship which saw no physical attachment, but romantic affection, Melanie had learned to cope with one of the more awkward and frustrating of God’s children and, in her heart, saw the peace and joy which came from someone who showed kindness and grace. And, because of this, appreciated the wisdom of her eternal father in the life lessons she had always known were true, in her heart, anyway.
Daniel smiled at her. She noticed him straight away. A faint smile, just a hint of one, and then he was gone. But she knew he liked her. She knew that.
He had been a member of the fan club for many years now and, finally, after she had let him know were she lived, she found he had moved not far down the road from her. And, unsurprisingly, whenever she was at the mall in the food-court he had an uncanny sense of being there, sitting just a little away, sometimes noting her, but trying to be as casual as possible.
He still emailed her, and sometimes she would answer. In his letters she noticed he tried hard not to ask anything of her. Anything which would allude to him making demands on her time or attention. And, perhaps because of that, she had started to like him a little. It seemed, although she had not quite fathomed him yet, but it seemed he generally respected her and wished her well in life. As if he wanted good things for her.
She puzzled, though, why he wasn’t a little bolder, and why he didn’t come forward more often to talk to her. ‘Perhaps he is scared of my success,’ she thought to herself. ‘Or perhaps he is just a little shy.
* * * * *
Daniel wanted to fuck Melanie. Boy, did he want to fuck Melanie. She was death on two legs, as far as he was concerned. The hottest vagina he had seen in a hell of a long time. Naked. That is how he wanted to picture her, and as much as possible. But not yet – not even in his mind. It was a line, at the moment, he refused to cross. Because, perhaps more than anything else, he seemed to think that girls like Melanie wanted to be respected. That girls like Melanie wanted to be treated well, and with care and forethought. To be treated kindly and esteemed as a decent person, with good values. This much he thought was true because of the way she presented herself. Her album lyrics were carefully written to be sensitive to people and promote a decent way of life. He really did not know wether she was so very deliberate in crafting such words to be politically correct towards the masses, or wether they were genuine, natural words, which simply reflected the heart of the angel Melanie. But even if intentionally deliberate he worried not because they still would have reflected a heart of total concern. He had been a fan of Melanie for the last 700 years, seeing her live performances many times, owning all her CD Albums and most of her singles as well. He had tonnes of merchandise which he stored in his small mansion, a mansion he had bothered to go to the effort to afford simply because of his strong desire to own a lot of things about his favourite musicians and various other things. He found he just needed the space to store it all, no longer convicted about the size of the mansion because of his genuine love for the articles he had obtained and the joy that they gave him. A counsellor had told him, once, after his query wether it was too much that he really shouldn’t worry because he had a genuine liking for the artefacts, and it had nothing to do with hoarding wealth or trying to be showy with possessions. In such circumstances a small mansion was quite appropriate.
Of course, he had a lot of other favourite musicians as well, in his early years a lot of male ones, but he had finally gotten rid of all his male musicians’ paraphernalia and decided, in true hetero style, just to concentrate on ones from the opposite sex. In the end he was just basically a guy who digged chicks and liked their music, so there was no point in pretending otherwise.
But fucking Melanie would not be easy. Probably not easy at all. For starters, he doubted she would be that easy to score with. And perhaps that would be a good thing. Because if she really was that easy, then she could end up fucking any Tom, Dick or Harry. And he really didn’t want her to do that. If she got to a Tom, well, that would be bad. But Dick, well that might be too much for him. And Harry, you could never trust a Harry. Oh, he came on all smooth and stuff, but get him naked and watch out. So he hoped to hell that if she got to a Tom Cat she would leave it at that, and hopefully he would be the next name and the last name on her list. Hopefully.
* * * * *
Melanie looked at the dildo. It was that time of the week again. Lonely, frustrated, and alone. Still no man. She went to the cupboard, grabbed the X Rated video, put it on and started watching. It took about half an hour but slowly the fire down below started getting a little hotter and she reached for her pleasure stick. Then, as the scenes heated up, the orgasm gradually approached as she plunged the erotica instrument into her feminine glory. ‘Oh fuck,’ she said to herself, and suddenly that familiar feeling exploded through her loins, as she came hard.
Breathing heavily, starting to calm down, she got up, went to the shower, and cooled down, cleaning herself thoroughly. She came back into her living room, took the video out of the cassette player, and returned it to her cupboard. Suddenly she was hungry, and needed some meat. She grabbed her purse and keys, gave the flat one last look, and headed off for the mall.
* * * * *
Sitting there, eating some fried chicken, she noticed him pretty quickly. She had been there for about 5 minutes when he showed up at Subway and ordered a roll and a drink. And then he sat down, just at the next table. He looked at her, sipped on his drink and said ‘Hi Mel. Hope you are well.’
‘Yeh, things are good Daniel.’
‘Cool,’ he replied and went back to his meal.
As she sat there, working through her chips and sipping on a Coke, looking up at the foodcourt television screen, she couldn’t help but notice the gaze upon her. The not so subtle gaze of Daniel’s eyes on her body. ‘What was he imagining,’ she thought to herself. ‘Was he picturing me naked?’ She continued eating and finally decided to give him a little glance. She turned towards him and he instantly turned his head to look at her, giving her a faint smile. She smiled back a little, and returned to watching the TV screen. And then, suddenly, he stood, took his food to the bin, and left. As she watched him go she wondered if he really did in fact like her, or wether he, in the end, was just a fan watching his idol. Returning to her food she continued watching the screen but Daniel was in her head a little and, while she was not really sure if she liked him at all even, his face still lingered a bit.
* * * * *
Daniel put on the Geraldine CD, one of his other favourite singers. She was a fiery redhead, who he fancied shockingly. Like Melanie, he thought Geraldine was intensely cute and desired to fuck her as well. Hey, she was a babe and he was a guy – it was only doing what any other angel wanted to do in their heart anyway.
Listening to the CD, happily singing along quietly to himself, he considered the latest chess move in the mail correspondence game he had going on with a friend on the other side of the Realm. It was a brilliant move he had made and Daniel was stumped. Things were looking bloody difficult now. It was game number 3,457 in the games between them and he had only want 703 of them with 417 draws and his friend winning the rest. He really was bloody hard, but Daniel was getting there. He’d catch up eventually. It was just a matter of time.
Suddenly feeling hungry he went into the kitchen and grabbed some cold pizza which he had left in the fridge since last night. He also grabbed a pitcher of homemade lemonade and, sitting on the couch, looking at the chess set. As the seventh song on the CD ended, and one of his favourites came on, he suddenly found him in a good mood. Finishing off the pizza and lemonade, he gave the chess set one last look, went into the kitchen and put some pizza in a lunchbox and filled a flask with some lemonade, grabbed his coat, and left his flat heading off for the nearby park.
* * * * *
Bag man was there again. Daniel noticed him, reading through a book as he usually did. Poor old Satan. Hopefully Raphael would give the bastard a break one day. He thought he might go over and have a chat, but remembered that Raphael was pretty insistent that Satan learn his lesson, so decided to comply with the party line for the time being and not worry too much. Satan would be fine, in the end. Some lessons had to be learned the hard way, so that was life, wasn’t it.
He sat down by the pond, opened his lunchbox he had brought with him, and finished off his cold pizza. That finished he started on the lemonade. Looking at the pond, noting the ripples from the gentle breeze which was blowing, he felt content. Things were good, at the moment. Really good. The move had been the right thing to do. Sure, Melanie was the main reason he had made the choice to switch locations, but the city he found himself in was really an awesome place to live. It had great services and top food. In fact, everything he generally wanted could be found here. And, of course, Melanie herself.
He didn’t think he really wanted to marry Melanie. Not really. In fact, probably never. Probably never. Marriage was an old sacred cow of the religious maniacs as far as he was concerned. Pledges of loyalty that they never ended up keeping in the end anyway convinced him, as far as he was concerned, that there really was little point in trying to stay faithful to a partner in a commitment before God which really, in truth, was just a monument of pride and boasting which the fundamentalists used in their legalisms on normal people. And the way they judged them was often with so much pride and hostility, as if they were creatures of perfection. But, no, they weren’t. They were a joke in the end. Hypocritical beasts denying their own true natures. People were naturally attracted to other people – as simple as that. And even in a relationship where you really liked the other person a lot, it was a fact as far as he was concerned that you still liked looking at other people and thought about them. Why bother denying the truths of existence. Why bother at all.
He watched the trees blow gently in the breeze, smiling at the ways of the creator. The world of nature – the natural lifestyle. The only way an angel should really behave and flow in harmony with. He remembered an old religion, one he had almost accepted. One which taught that its followers were superior to the natural order, as if they were teachers of salvation from a God who supposedly was their own special God and they his special flock. But that was a joke. A fucking joke. They were hypocrites, in the end, out of harmony with the way people really were supposed to be in the true creators order. They were servants of a dark lord – one who masqueraded in cloaks of righteousness, but whose evil was plain to see in the mind of a repentant heart.
Getting down on his knees he drank some water from the pond, splashed some on his face, and stood up and stretched himself. The day was passing and he was starting to get tired. He thought on the morrow’s activities and felt, perhaps, seeing as it had nearly been a decade, he would finally get around to his new book. The ‘Chronicles’ were still coming out and he had a large realm-wide readership. He was not a well known author though, selling books through his own private website and not putting the sales figures on the official charts. He avoided media and tried to keep a low profile. And he had even removed his picture from his rww.heavenspace.heav homepage. Daniel wanted to maintain a low profile with the general public, instead preferring to concentrate on genuine fame. Fame in which his fans were genuine fans, not based on any hype from the media, but those who found his website through word of mouth or through a “googolplexianite” search engine web search. In this way his entire popularity would be genuine, with no fake hangers on.
As he walked back to his car, he noticed Bag Man again, reading through one of the books he read. Perhaps he would introduce himself one day. Perhaps – but not for now.
* * * * *
Melanie sat in her room, listening to a CD by one of her other favourite female singers. Geraldine, she felt, was a very talented singer – very talented indeed. Her voice, to Melanie, resonated with a beauty which came from an inner soul dedicated to a standard of behaviour a little bit more mature than the average angel. Geraldine was, in Melanie’s way of thinking, complex. Quite complex. In fact so bloody complex that Melanie, on some of Geraldine’s earlier albums thought to herself ‘What the fuck is this bitch on about.’ You see Geraldine had developed the fine art of sarcasm. Extreme sarcasm. But this was hidden amongst lyrics which were often cryptic and difficult to decipher in their true intent and meaning. She would say one thing, and you would think ‘oh, that is what she is on about.’ But, after a deeper listening and a cogitatious philosophical reflection you would learn she was often having a go in the way she subtley praised something. You noticed it in the tone of her voice or the choice of words. One song in particular, called ‘Fair Gentleman’, had always made Melanie a little bit suspicious on the choice of the word ‘Fair’. Melanie assumed, perhaps rightly or wrongly, that Geraldine was attempting to put the male sex in its place with a response to the long held compliment of masculinity to their counterparts in the language they verily used. Perhaps, one day, she would track down Geraldine and mayhaps do a project together. It would be interesting to see the fruit of such an endeavour. It would be most interesting.
Feeling thirsty she went to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of coke from the fridge. She started drinking it and sat down at her PC. It was usually left on and connecting to the realm net, she surfed to her homepage. There she was, looking as beautiful as ever – definitely the way she wanted, in her heart, to present herself. Suddenly, out of nowhere really, she decided to type in Daniel’s name. Perhaps he had a homepage on one of the social websites. While she was not really interested in him in any romantic way, it might be interesting to see what he was like if he had a profile available. She typed in his first name and surname and the name of the city she knew he had come from. She found a number of entries but about half way down the list of 100 entries she found something which looked interesting. It was his name, like the others, but this one claimed it to be of an author of a series of books. She clicked on the link and funnily enough the rww.heavenspace.heav website came up. Checking the details section, which matched up with him, but not seeing a photo, she assumed it might be him. She looked at the profile for a few minutes seeing his favourite hobbies, interests and beliefs and decided to click on the link to the books. ‘The Chronicles of the Eternal Realm of Glory’. They seemed interesting. Raphael, by the looks of it, was one of the main stars of the series as a number of the stories featured him in the title. But near the end of the list, with a note which read ‘New’ was a book which had Satan in the title. She read again and noticed that it had just been added that day. This one she would look at. It could prove most interesting reading material.
* * * * *
Currently, regular masturbation was generally the call of duty for Satan’s little soldier. Satan had not scored with Mel, no matter how sweet he had been in the end, and as such had resorted to the standard pornography to alleviate his sexual urges. It was a ‘Solo Man’s’ last recourse but, fuckit, such was life.
* * * * *
Daniel watched as the garbage truck pulled up, hoisted his wheely bins into the air and dumped the rubbish into the truck, and moved on further down the street. It was Thursday morning and the garbos came without fail.
Melanie was on his mind. He thought, today. Perhaps today he would be bold enough to go and visit her. Perhaps today. He had waited a fair while and, after all, it had been the reason he had moved in the end.
Getting into his GYZ4000, Daniel put a CD into the player. It was a band he had just started listening to – ‘Le Ultrafuckables’ – the hottest girl-band he had ever seen. French chicks, with breasts which would make any man die from over-orgasming. Fuck, they were hot, and Daniel digged the hell out of them. Of course, so they all claimed, they were 5 of the sweetest virgins in the Realm and would only allow the absolute hottest of all angelicdom come near them for discussions on dating. They were the elite of the elite and Daniel fancied the hell out of them. But, in the end, they were simply pleasure-bots. Bodies made to carnal perfection, it would seem, but with an intelligence quotient just a little too low for Daniel. And some of their personal mannerisms, while they were quite expert in the French style, betrayed a heart which suffered just a little too much from lack of mercy. They were hot – they were slick – and the music was awesome. But that was all it was. Soul seemed to be lacking to a great degree and, perhaps like fast food in some ways, it tasted great but was not necessarily that healthy for you in the end.
He pulled up in the carpark of Melanie’s apartment block. He looked up at the window to see if he could see her. Suddenly, quite surprisingly, she passed by the window and Daniel got a shock. She was topless. So now he had seen Melanie topless for the first time ever and he liked what he saw. Quite a bit.
He came up to the door, pushed the button and waited. After a few seconds the intercom came on and Melanie’s voice spoke, saying, ‘Yes, who is it.’
‘Uh, it’s Daniel. You know, from down the road.’
There was no reply immediately, but after a few seconds Melanie spoke, saying ‘Yeh, ok. Come on up. Just push the door open when it buzzes. Number 13.’
After a few moments the buzzer rang and Daniel pushed open the door, climbed the stairs and knocked on number 13. Melanie opened up and a looked at him. ‘Hey Danny Boy.’
‘So watcha want?’
‘Oh, um. You know. Just thought I’d drop around to say hi.’
‘Come on in.’
He came in, looked around the unit, and sat down on the couch Melanie motioned for him to sit at. ‘Can I get you a drink?’
‘Uh, sure. Juice if you have some.’
Melanie went off and returned shortly with a glass full of watermelon juice and ice.’
‘What’s this?’ Daniel asked.
‘Watermelon juice. I can’t get enough of the stuff.’
He took a sip. ‘Tastes great,’ he said. ‘Thanks.’
He sipped on his juice while Melanie sat down on the couch opposite him. She looked at him for a few moments, and finally he looked away, staring up the diamond records up on the wall behind her.
’10,000,000 album sales achieved, huh? That’s not bad.’
‘Oh, that record has 17 Diamonds now,’ responded Melanie. ‘It has sold pretty much constantly since its release.’
’17, huh? Not too bad. What is the record, anyway?’
‘You don’t know?’
‘I haven’t studied the all time charts for millennia. No idea who is currently on top.’
‘Well, Gabriel is currently number one. 42 Diamonds currently, and still going strong.’
‘Which album?’ asked Daniel, curiously.
‘Oh, that one. Not surprising, I suppose.’
‘Yeh. But I’ll catch him. I don’t give up, you see. I keep at it.’
‘Yeh, I know you do. It is why I am such a big fan, you know.’
‘Really?’ said Melanie, a slight smile on her face.
‘Yeh, well, I have this philosophy on life. Life is full of countless numbers of people, but so few really bother to use their talents that well and just live a life in the doldrums, remaining mr and mrs average. I mean, good luck to them, but they are kind of boring in the end. Not much spark. Often not a lot to talk about apart from simple family issues or work issues. And after a number of years going through that shit it gets pretty repetitive. I mean who gives a fuck who aunt Sally is shagging these day. Sure, its juicy goss, but I have heard it all before.’
Melanie looked at him, slightly concerned at the tone of heavy criticism, but decided to consider his point anyway. ‘Don’t you think you are being a bit judgemental, Danny. I mean, I guess you have a sort of intellectual perspective on things, from noting that comment, and I guess I see were you are coming from, but people are just people in the end. So why so much pride?’
‘Pride? Are you fucking kidding me? The flock of God are second rate on a good day. And believe me, that is a fucking good day. I mean, they have talent and abilities but their too lazy and they complain too much about God’s holy standards to bother getting off their arse and having a go. They suck, Mel. By and large most of them fucking suck.’
‘So what. Who gives a fuck?’
‘So says the heart of one who has settled for mediocrity. I mean if that is what you are into, then fair enough. But while the stars shine brightly, lass, and the stars do often shine brightly, and I guess you really are one of those, one of those mediocre stars, I know were I am heading.’
‘And were is that?’ she asked, carefully, not letting the sledge get to her?”
‘Well there is only one bloody sun, isn’t there.’
She looked at him, softened a little, thought on his book she had just read, and considered that. ‘Only one sun, you say? Only one sun?’
‘Uh, yeh babe. Yeh. I mean, Yeshie boy worked his ass off and so did that Jacob fellow. But they are small fries in the end, sweetheart. Minor competition.’
‘And what gives you such confidence?’
‘Well I actually am.’
Melanie considered that, looked at him carefully, and forewent her criticism.
‘Fine,’ she said, went to the kitchen, returned with another glass of watermelon juice filled with ice, and sat down in front of, legs crossed, waiting for him to speak further.
Daniel finally continued, after looking at her for a short while. ‘Well, what I am is what I am, and that is they way I was made. So I don’t actually end up bragging about my own abilities. But I have noticed, and this is where I really don’t excuse the rest of the flock. I have noticed that so bloody few of them, and with huge amounts of talent available to them, ever really bother applying themselves. Few ever really go to hard enough efforts. And, I do know, they have the talent. They’re just fucking lazy.’
She looked at him for a short moment, thought on all her successes and how hard she had applied herself and continued to work at it to achieve her glory, and, despite knowing it might be a hard choice of heart to accept, assented anyway. ‘I suppose he is right,’ she thought to herself. ‘I suppose he is right.’
* * * * *
Daniel looked up at his bookcase. 100% Daniel. All his books he had in his bookcase were his own creations, all his own works. In the end, so he had concluded, why the fuck would he want to read the amateurs. They were only second rate in the end. No spark – no fire – and when they seriously tried to compete they had no fucking idea, full of all sorts of sin and evil. No fucking idea the competition. You see Daniel had a philosophy on his writing. A strong level of holiness and fundamental spiritual lessons as his foundation stone. On such a foundation he could push the edges of hetero cool. And hetero cool was were it was at as far as Daniel was concerned. Of course, his characters needed an edge. An erotic, hard core, hetero edge. But they needed a strong foundation of spirituality – one which knew exactly where it was and what it was doing. And when they pushed the edge a little too much had the sense of mind to return to the older, safer standards, keeping the faith and breathing a little easier. Be daring, go for broke, push boundaries, but in the words of a sensible chick ‘You must be kidding me’, in reference to questions of how far exactly she would push it. See, Daniel was grounded, and laughed at those who might slur him. For he saw in them this truth – once they thought there sins were cool, in they would go. But they just wanted the forbidden fruit – that was all they fucking wanted. And Danny Boy, the old Devil, chuckled to himself because of it.
* * * * *
Melanie looked in the mirror. Danny boy was on her mind. She had read another of his short stories that morning, one which featured a few of the top angels in the Realm that she was familiar with, and she was surprised by the quality of the storytelling. It really was of a high standard. He had made claims to her yesterday – strong claims. And she was thinking to herself, in her criticisms of this angelic fellow, that if his claims really where the truth, then there would have to be, at least, a high enough level of intellectualism which addressed such claims. But more than that – really, for Melanie, she needed more than just clever, intellectual and witty storytelling – she expected to see something of the other – some of the divine – something ineffable, as it were – something which spoke of only the hand of God at work. And unless she saw such things at work in the writings of Mr Daniel, then she really would lose interest and disdain his brash and bold claims.
* * * * *
Daniel went to the cupboard and pulled out one of his porn videos. It was R Rated, as his entire collection of 3 porn videos were, all of them basic ‘Girls’ only vids, as suited his diehard attitude on heterosexuality. He put it in the slot, pressed play, and sat down to relax. Sitting there, watching the usual girl go through the usual routine, his mind started wandering. It would be nice, he felt, if Melanie was one of the girls in his video collection. He could satisfy his lustful desires built up over many decades of silent observation, gratified in the carnal heat of the solitary man’s pleasure. But, really, didn’t Mel deserve more than that. More than being a ‘video’ girlfriend, an object of affection, an idol desired but never met and developed into a real relationship with. And thinking that, suddenly feeling convicted, he stopped the tape, returned it to his cupboard, and went off to think.
He looked up at the lamplight. It shone brightly in the dark sky. He turned away from the lamp, and walked further up the path, veering off to the left and sat down in a quiet, dark place. He looked up at the sky – the stars radiated their usual message of simplicity of a gentle guide to the nocturnal traveller. Daniel thought on the ‘Rainbow Bible’. Genesis 1 – 11:9. His sacred scripture as a human. Pacifism. It taught pacifism – peaceful behaviour towards people. But its principles also taught to separate from heretics – those who followed after idols. And such was the Abrahamic faiths of Samaritanism, Karaism, Judaism, Christianity, Catholicism, Islam, Bahai and the others. Also, all the other false belief systems such as Atheism, Agnosticism, Deism, Deitheism, Buddhism, Taoism, Confucianism, Eckism, Scientology, Any system based on Jesus of Nazareth and all his various titles and names, any system which utilized books which were called holy, scripture or in any way admired or respected apart from the ‘Rainbow Bible’ and Daniel’s own ‘Chronicles of the Children of Destiny’ and his other works. Basically, everything apart from Daniel was wrong. It was a simple as that. They were all heretics, into sin, and set on the pathways of eternal destruction. And such was the way of life. They’re were a few people who seemed to acknowledge principles of truth, but they were usually besotted by idolatry and carnal sin anyway, so they were also on the road to death, denying the very truth which was intended to save them.
* * * * *
Britney looked at the clock. 12:45. She had just finished lunch. But she was still thirsty. She went into her playroom, grabbed a 1 dollar coin from the glass bowl on her bookcase, and put it into the Coke Machine. Drinking the Coke, she thought on ‘Danny Boy’. It seemed he was in the slow process of actually growing up. But, while she didn’t mind being coveted, she thought he was still a very big dork. But some of his books were ok. Not bad for a tryhard.
She looked at the latest book he had mailed to her. ‘The Erotic Adventures of Santa Claus in the Queendom of the Lust-filled Fairy Princesses.’ It was tempting her, all the time. Perhaps she should read it. Perhaps. Maybe later.
She finished off the Coke, went to the fridge, grabbed some cold pizza, and another can of coke, sat on the couch, and watched ‘The Breakfast Club’ for probably the 7,000th time.
* * * * *
Madonna looked at the X-Rated video Daniel had sent her. ‘The Erotic Adventures of Lucifer Hellfire Armageddon in the land of the Ultrafuckable Amazonian Princesses’. The title, really, was quite arousing. And slipping out of her nightgown, naked in front of the LCD screen, she put the DVD into the player, pressed play, and sat on her couch in front of the screen, watching anxiously as the movie got under way. Really, she was in the mood, and this really could be the kind of entertainment she had been waiting for. Something to fire up in orgasmic, carnal and slutty ecstasy, the vivacious and bellissamae centre of her feminine glory. And fuck was she turned on.
* * * * *
Melanie sat down near the Apple Tree. She looked at her pet snake crawling around the branches, hissing occasionally, and generally seeming quite content. She had named her pet snake ‘Satan’, which she thought was a lovely name to give to a snake. She fed her snake mice and rats regularly , and Satan would always hiss at her with pleasant affection. She liked watching ‘Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone’ with Satan. She always teased him when ‘Slythering was mentioned’, saying ‘They’re’ they are dear Satty. Lovely house Slythering. And Satan would watch intently at his heroes such as Malfoy and the other regular crew.
She stood up, picked an apple, and started eating it. It was delicious, full of fruitiness, and tasted lovely. It was crisp and fresh, and she was very happy eating it. Very happy indeed.
* * * * *
Melanie B sat down near her Orange tree. She looked at her pet snake ‘Semyaza’ slithering all around the branches. ‘Semmy, Semmy, Semmy. Oh how I love you, dear Semmy.’ Semmy hissed a ‘Thanksss’ at her, and continued his lovely slithering. She reached, picked a fresh orange, peeled it, and ate a piece. The flavour rushed through her mouth, alive with sweet and tangy perfection. They really were awesome oranges.
She sat there for a few hours that afternoon, having retrieved some orange juice from the fridge, filled with ice, and sitting in the shade of the Orange Tree, watching ‘Semyaza’ happily slither around, she thought to herself ‘Life was good’. Eternal life really was good, and thank heaven above that all things were working out. Thank heaven for that.
* * * * *
Britney decided to go for a walk. She grabbed her coat and her purse and made her way off to the nearby shopping mall. As she was walking along, past a park, she noticed ‘Bag Man’ doing his usual thing – reading a book. It was, apparently, from what she had heard, apart from his miserly work, all that he had going for him. ‘I guess that was life at the bottom’, she thought to herself.
Getting near the shops she looked up at the Greeny Orange sky. It was late in the day and the sky looked quite beautiful. It was such a haunting change from earth, one she still hadn’t quite gotten used to.
Getting near the shops she noticed a snack bar and decided to get a drink. She ordered a Caramel Milkshake, a cold one, and sitting there drinking it with a straw, she noticed Mr Radcliffe was out the back of the snack bar, in the kitchen doing some cooking. That was quite like Daniel Radcliffe, a very adaptable person who was not full of ego, interested in doing this and that simply to broaden his experiences on life. Britney quietly admired him and thought he had, from her perspective these days, in reflection of the kind of virtues he had displayed in his heavenly walk, earned the glory he had received on earth and the fame he had achieved. And, now, he was as popular as ever, willing to do the kind of things which other people were often simply to proud to do. Willing to humble himself and serve God, as people with the name of Daniel often in fact did. It was just like the lessons of the book of Daniel, with its fundamental teaching on the pride of ‘Nebuchadnezzar’, and the humbling lesson he learnt and taught to others. The Book of Daniel, it seemed, was meant to teach these lessons, and it seemed it was a great honour when the spirit of God chose that name and put that name into the parents mind to give to their child. Really, it did seem a great honour indeed.
She finished off her milkshake and, thinking it tasted so nice, ordered another one. As she sat there, drifting off into space, Mr Radical approached. ‘Hey Brit.’
‘Hey DR,’ she responded.
‘Drinkin a milkshake.’
‘Yeh, we make the best.’
‘So do you like tossing burgers.’
‘Oh, its work. You know. I am after the manager’s position. Working my way up the chain.’
‘What’s the plan?’
‘I’ll go solo one day. I have a name for the store – ‘Fatty Burgers’.
‘With as much animal fat as you can handle. Dripping in wholesome goodness.’
Britney licked her lips. ‘I can’t wait.’
‘Oh, and the high grade Coca Cola – you know the one with the Extra Added Sugar – the one which is on Raphael’s blacklist. Man, does it give you a rush. You’re in heaven for hours with the stuff.’
‘Cool. Well, Seeya.’
She continued on to the shops and noticed a video game arcade over to the side. She ventured in, noticed Daniel was over playing Gauntlet 7, his usual favourite game, and Rebecca was sitting in the corner, reading from the ‘Book of Rebecca’ by the looks of it, seemingly happy and content. JT was playing pool and noticed her immediately. He walked over. ‘Brit.’
* * * * *
Melanie put on another CD. The Spice Girls ‘Lost in Spice’. It was one of their best albums. She looked through the 9 track titles. Track 1 – Hot Spice, Track 2 – Sugar is Sweet, Track 3 – Totally Wicked, Track 4 – Carnal Affections, Track 5 – That Boy is Spunkadelic, Track 6 – Divine Fire, Track 7 – Lost in Spice, Track 8 – Callodyel Harmony, Track 9 – Out of Sight.
She sat there, on the floor, the music playing, drinking watermelon juice, eating a vegeburger which the guy from ‘Hungry Jack’s’ had delivered, in her own little heaven of bliss.
* * * * *
Alecia sat on the steps of her house. She looked at the sky. It was green as usual. It was getting hot at the moment, so she walked around the back, stripped down, and dived into her pool. After about half an hour of swimming around she went inside and put on a CD. ‘Bon Jovi – New Jersey’. ‘Lay your hands on me’ came on and she disappeared into the heart of ‘Jon’, letting go of some anxiety which had built up, feeling a bit better, feeling a bit more positive about things.
* * * * *
Britney really looked fucking hot today, Daniel thought to himself. Like fire itself. But the bitch went over to chat with JT, and didn’t even give me a fucking look. Bitch. Bitch. Bitch.
As he sat there, considering the drowning of his sorrows in a Coke, he decided he may as well, and went to the fridge, grabbed a Coke can, opened it, sat down in front of the tv, put on Brit’s greatest hits, and for the next 3 hours said everytime her face appeared, ‘Bitch, Bitch, Bitch.’ But everytime he got a little bit of a smile on his face and realized he loved her, so such were the ironies of life.
* * * * *
Melanie looked at the picture of Daniel he had finally caved and given to her, sitting on top of her piano. He really was quite handsome. Quite a catch she was now thinking to herself. Should she date the devil? Should she date this man who was determined to be the very ‘Sun of God’ if he was at all capable of achieving such glory. Should she date Xaddadaxx himself. It was an interesting idea, but if Kalan liked her, as he claimed he did, if Callodyn really was the man for her, then she wanted a sign. Some sort of sign of commitment which would prove to her that his love would last forever. Some sort of commitment.
* * * * *
Daniel picked the ‘Rainbow Bible’ off his shelf, walked outside, and made his way steadily to Melanie’s house. He knocked on the door, Melanie answered, and he threw the Rainbow Bible at her. ‘Get the fuck over the Jesus Boy, Mel. Get the fuck over it.’ And that said, he disappeared, back to his home, realizing she would eventually get the fuck over it. Idols were idols in the end – who the fuck really wanted to be up the butt of Jesus boy whose only agenda was to try and rule the world with the underlying motivation of fucking as many females and males as he possibly could. Using them up, spitting them out, defiling their honour, and then judging them to hell to keep them in line. He was cancer, evil and an abomination to Daniel and one day, he knew, Melanie would admit the truth.
* * * * *
Daniel sat in his room, thinking it over. It was the right thing to do. It was about time she learned the truth, and got over Satan. Jesus was just no good, just no good. Corruption and sin eats away at itself in the end, just like the Jewish religion as well. The circumcision was the point where the Jews had died and gone into death. And after thousands of years of justifying such hypocrisy their evil was steadily and inevitably damning them. And Daniel was relieved because of it. He knew down on earth that the standards amongst them had slipped so much that suicide itself was starting to become an attractive option. The quick rush and the end to the struggle. And of course, murder was looking more and more appealing all the time to the mind of the damned ones. Hellfire and oblivion waited, but such was life. Such was life.
* * * * *
Melanie was disappointed. Daniel was so judgemental. Really, she thought he was terribly arrogant to be so hard on Jewish people, just because they circumcised. I mean, what was wrong with circumcision? Why was that a problem? And so, deciding to give the issue some thought, she approached her PC, opened the ‘Word Forever’ word processor, and typed in a new document ‘The Circumcision Question – An investigation into a spiritual dilemma by Melanie C’. She sat staring at the screen, wondering what solutions life itself would provide for her, and slipped out into the kitchen, drank from her pitcher of watermelon juice, and stood there, thinking. Just thinking.
* * * * *
Daniel looked at the ‘Orianthi’ CD Single. ‘According to you’. Released again. God she was an arrogant bitch. Up her arse something shocking. She was stupid, useless, couldn’t do anything right. She was difficult, hard to please, and couldn’t do anything right. She was pathetic. And there was this other dildo who wanted her. But who gave a fuck anyway. Who gave a fuck. Besides, she was boring, moody, she sucked at telling jokes. But the song was alright.
* * * * *
‘Walking around on a broken leg.’ Melanie couldn’t get the fucking song out of her head. ‘Walking around on a broken leg.’
* * * * *
Melanie looked at the seagull on the beach. It was busily eating a fish which had come to the shore, met its fate, and provided itself as a noble sacrifice for the hungry gull. She was on her long towel, the umbrella shading her, looking at the hot boys on the beach. She had her sunglasses on, the transistor radio was playing, a bottle of iced champagne by her side, and all right in the world. Boy after hot boy came up, smiled at her, often flexed their muscles, and offered her various affections for a night of carnal lust. And while she was at times quite tempted, she let them be. She’d had her fill of carnality for a while, and other things could suffice. But those hot spunks sure did look good. They sure did look good.
* * * * *
Orianthi looked at the website. ‘Chronicles of the Children of Destiny’ – An Amazing saga of the Lives of the Eternal Angels. It could prove interesting reading. And, by the looks of it, it was all free to read online. Mmm. Perhaps something to check out.
* * * * *
JT was now, just about, over Britney. Just about. Rihanna was looking finer all the time, but he was now into ‘Orianthi’. She was now the new hot thing. Totally hot. Totally and completely hot. Yeh, she was the one to go for. Chase that tail.
* * * * *
Melanie sat down at her PC, having given it some thought, and wrote out these words. ‘I suppose, it couldn’t really be argued that the foreskin doesn’t have a natural part in the design of the human body.’ In fact, it seemed to Melanie quite probable that the foreskin did have a practical and important purpose in the design of the male human body. It protected the head of the Phallus, which was naturally a sensitive part of the human body. Going further, the actual act of circumcision was an act of deliberate aggression and violence on the human body of the male. Even if the one doing the circumcision was embarrassed or had no actual hatred towards the baby, they were still practicing enough evil to mutilate the child anyway. They were, inevitably, in the position of error and, as error was sin – the fundamental basis of sin, the Abrahamic, Samaritan, Jewish and Muslim systems of religion were fatally flawed and on the road to destruction. It was a logic of universal spiritual truth which, now, seemed to make sense to Melanie. The only cure – the only real cure – was the renunciation and repentance of the deliberate act of circumcision. This was the only possible cure. The only, inevitably, possible cure.
* * * * *
Melanie picked up the Rainbow Bible which Daniel had given her. Genesis chapter 1 through to Genesis chapter 11 verse 9. It covered ‘Creation’ to the end of the ‘Tower of Babel’ incident. Daniel had written some notes for Melanie. Apparently he acknowledged that the general documentary hypothesis seemed sound and correct and advocated ‘Richard Elliott Friedman’s’ ‘Who Wrote the Bible?’ as a both scholarly, academic and mainstream work, accessible by anybody with a basic sense of biblical knowledge, and also anyone outside of that field who just had a general interest. Daniel’s view was that the early Hebrew scribes compiled together histories and legal rulings from their history in the compilation of the Torah and the Hebrew Bible. But, in Daniel’s judgement, Abram was led astray by deceiving spirits, and the circumcision was not the work of the creator, or the sign of any divine covenant. Daniel presented to her the basic view that the ‘Rainbow Bible’ was still a basically sound and acceptable historical document, relative mainly to the era in which it was produced were the recording of history was still at a basic level, meaning that there was no reason to expect such things as ‘Divinely Written’ or ‘Infallible’ or ‘Inerrant’ or anything like that. Yet, simply because it was the only real information that mankind had available on the origins of earth and the universes creation, and that it likely spoke, in Daniel’s opinion, of a sound enough recording of history, that it was thus acceptable to use in a ‘Scriptural’ or ‘Religious’ sense. The actual coining of the term ‘Rainbow Bible’ had indeed a precedent, established in the ‘Noughties’ decade of the 2000s, thus there was a factual historical witness. This much was true, correct, and could not be disputed on an historical basis. The sign of the Rainbow Bible’s covenant was, of course, the Rainbow itself. This covenant promised mankind and animals that God would never send another flood. That was the promise of the covenant. There was also rules given pertaining to the covenant, and those established earlier in mankind’s history. The main rules pertaining to the time of the covenant were ‘The forbidding of the eating of blood’ and ‘The forbidding of murder, with God’s intent that murderers be put to death.’ Daniel had written a note which said ‘Murderers, once having killed, are always capable of killing again, no matter what type of repentance they may have claimed. Thus, the term ‘Death Entities’ meaning creatures capable of killing, and thus being a spirit or entity of ‘Death’. Because of this, those who did not kill who were worthy of life had the fundamental human right granted to them by God to live and, because they had the right to live, they had the fundamental right to protection from murder, and as such the only responsible thing to do with murderers was to put them to death. It was just, fair and appropriate punishment. As for their fate beyond death, well that was in the hands of God.
The Circumcision problem was that it allowed ‘Death’ and ‘Murder’ in for the act of simple things common to human beings. For example, ‘Homosexual practice’, which was, in Daniel’s opinion, simply an alternative type of lifestyle some people felt suited to and enjoyed, was something which the religion of the Israelites tried to destroy. They were intent on killing them and had devised the sexual sanctions in Leviticus 18 & 20 and the story of ‘Sodom and Gomorrah’ for the intent of removing such behaviour from their populace. This was simply an ‘Elitist’ spirit, not tolerant or accepting of people who chose different things for themselves. Such madness also applied to rulings on ‘Adultery’ and ‘Incest’. For example, Seth had sexual relations and married one of his sisters. This was normal and acceptable behaviour for human beings, part of the natural design. Many humans often found parents or children sexually attractive, and desired sexual relations with them. That was also a natural thing for many human beings. Daniel agreed that ‘Bestiality’ was inappropriate behaviour because of the potential embarrassment which it could cause animals. To Daniel, only sexual relations within a species or perhaps genus for certain animals, seemed appropriate. The passing on of venereal diseases, in Daniel’s view, ultimately originated with Bestial behaviour. Homosexuality, to Daniel, was a scope of behaviour not as much in harmony with the natural world as Heterosexual behaviour, which was behaviour which produced offspring and, thus, when Aids first arrived ‘Homosexual’ men were the first victims. Homosexuality was not wrong, as it were, but simply less nature based. It was a divergence from the norm, but it was not an act of aggression or violence, and thus did not violate fundamental principles of the ‘Rainbow Bible’. As such it was an allowable divergence which humans had the right to look into and explore for themselves. Whatever lessons they wanted or needed to learn, they would learn for themselves and ‘Live and let live’ was the core motto Daniel applied and was quite happy doing so.
And his notes went on further, but that was enough for Melanie to feel quite a bit better about this Daniel she had started to like.
* * * * *
Up in heaven above, the Creator was pleased. Quite pleased. Daniel had shared with Melanie some truths of life – truths of absolute existence. Her soul would mend even further and heal from the lies of her earthly upbringing. It would simply happen in the fullness of time, as knowledge of truth carefully and inevitably won the heart of his dear daughter.
* * * * *
Daniel walked down to the river, carrying a bag with various bottles of juices. As he sat on grass overlooking the river, the water following its course in happy regularity, Daniel considered Melanie. She seemed like an intelligent enough girl. He was thinking, probably, that she would see the point in his arguments. That she would understand that what she had been raised in was not the way of reality and had been, in fact, the way of death. Something which had inevitably killed her. Daniel had finally passed from life, really, for one reason. The women he really did in fact love had also passed and he just wouldn’t let them go. As simple as that.
He drank down the orange juice, feeling a little bit better today. Some anxiety had built up for a while. But now he was feeling good, and the juice was doing wonders. Staring at the water as it flowed along, he started thinking other thoughts on life. Other thoughts than the usual high spiritual dramas he had been mostly involved with for a very, very long time now. It seemed to himself he had reached a general conclusion on certain spiritual issues, was satisfied with his beliefs, and could now rest. It was alright now – it was alright. The devil of lies had been defeated in his heart, and his faith rested in the truth he knew to be true. The Rainbow would always last – as simple as that. It was an everlasting covenant and, while he knew certain technical possibilities in the Rainbow Bible, it seemed the intent of the creator for the Rainbow to Remain eternally. And that was good, Daniel thought to himself. That was good.
He started on the watermelon juice, enjoyed its sweet, light flavour and just drank in the peace and happiness which came from a heart which had found truth with God. And for this he was grateful. Truly grateful.
* * * * *
Melanie picked up the dictionary, something she was doing more and more these days, simply to continue her study of words to enlarge her knowledge base and improve her thinking. A greater personal vocabulary of words had the effect, it seemed to her, of, as words were added, improving intelligence. It seemed that a person’s intelligence increased as more knowledge was taken in and, perhaps what seemed important to Melanie, that this new knowledge was processed, thought upon, pondered, philosophized, and gradually brought into harmony with the other words known of in her mind. A continual increase and expansion of her knowledge base on life in the English speaking world seemed to be the resulting fruit, and an occupation of careful work worth the effort of pursuing. She remembered her ancient school days. Education had not always been the most exciting of pursuits, mainly focused then on being ‘Cool’ and crafting out a place in the ‘Social Hierarchy’. That of course had been a very important priority for Melanie, as it was for most people. But now, as her knowledge base was increasing, and she was starting to understand more of life, she now valued the idea, very highly, in true English tradition, of ‘Working on Things’. Showing an aptitude for gradually improving in areas of knowledge, skill and virtue, to be a truly ‘Accomplished English Lady’. It had been a strong part of her English tradition from an earlier period, especially in the Victorian era. But, and this was interesting to her now, their needed to be an impulse - and this impulse was 100% absolutely essential for her particular sand of infinite progression to continue forwards. Their needed to be a spirit of life within her, a drive, a focus, something which committed to the eternal – something which committed to the infinite. Of course, in the ‘Rainbow Bible’ it spoke of the ‘Tree of Life’. Yet, there was this lesson which Daniel had driven home as ABSOLUTELY FUNDAMENTALLY NECESSARY, or only DEATH could result. When God presented to your heart the choice of eating the forbidden fruit of knowledge of good and evil, you were a complete and utter tosser if you ate the stuff. Totally fucking nuts. And why? Just look at what happens to them all, says the Holy One. They all fucking die in the end, don’t they? They all fucking die in the end. So stick to the fruit of life, babe. Stick to the fruit of life, the spirit spoke to her mind in pleasant little ditties of joy.
* * * * *
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 & 7. Six days of creation, 7th day of rest. The angel Saruviel, the 7th Angel of the Realm of Eternal Glory, was curious on an issue. A theological issue which Daniel had been writing about on his website. Rejection of Circumcision did not seem quite right, so Saruviel was now writing an email with a response.
‘The Supernatural system of knowledge, dear Daniel, is a system which encompasses infinite knowledge and understanding. The design of the natural system is simply one aspect of the creator’s knowledge and designs. The purpose of the ‘Circumcision’ on the Eighth day is to represent ‘Supernatural’ intervention. As you know ‘8’ people were taken on board the Ark and, as such, this number represents supernatural intervention on behalf of God and indicates the power of ‘Salvation’. This seems quite abundantly clear. The ‘Natural’ system of the Universe is simply one potential design within the creator’s arsenal of potential designs. I feel you are quite mistaken on this issue, Daniel. Quite mistaken.’
It was about 3 days later, Saruviel checked his email, and Daniel had responded.
‘The Creator is consistent with himself. Perfectly consistent. He has complete knowledge of good and evil, but chooses good based on his spiritual nature. He is motivated by goodness, holiness and perfection. His system of design knows no flaws, inconsistencies, or error-based principles. God is flawless and without any error of any kind. His spirit is a spirit of absolute truth, with no corruption whatsoever. The deity of Israel is resplendid with principles of knowledge and truth – this is in no way disputed. But the funny thing about an apple which is rotten in its core is that it eventually dies and decays away and, really, is no good at all. The Israelite representation of deity has corrupt elements associated with it – this I know from personal spiritual observation. It is a corrupt element which will eventually destroy itself, succumbing to sin and death.
The Creator of the Rainbow has no flaws. No inconsistencies. No imperfections. He is a perfect being. The imperfections come from the deity of Israel, which we term the ‘Serpent Spirit’, a spirit imperfect and resorting to hatred and violence to justify its personal views on what is supposed to constitute divinity. It is this spirit which is responsible for disease, virus and death within the earthly system. This spirit was placed, by the Creator, within the forbidden tree of knowledge of good and evil. As such, ‘In the day you eat thereof you shall surely die’.
The Creator himself is separate and distinct from this evil, perfectly aware of it’s dark nature. Yet, while the creator has perfect knowledge of this evil, the Creator’s heart is perfectly motivated by goodness, holiness, love virtue and good and positive things. It has no ill will, no ill intent, no arrogance or hatred towards those children made in its image. The deity of Israel, on the other hand, arrogates to itself qualities ‘Supreme arrogance, demanding what it perceives of as the sovereign rights over life and death. It may kill at will, torture at will, hate at will and practice at will any other form of evil it so chooses. It displays this vanity by statements which suggest its ‘Absolute Authority’. On the other hand, the creator is decent, gentle, careful with people, loving of its children and desiring the very best of and for them. It is a creator which cares and is not motivated by destruction and ill will. Israel’s deity is very good at imitating this behaviour, but the soul is lacking. It has no true heart, instead delighting in its fallen Israelite child, attempting to corrupt the hearts and minds of the children of men with its barbaric views on morality, and its death sanctions within the Torah to exterminate all who would dare oppose it. The God of Israel is fucking evil, so get the fuck over it Saruviel. Get the fuck over it. Yours sincerely, Daniel.
* * * * *
Saruviel was thinking it over, and finally responded. ‘Well, Daniel. Whatever the case may be, I don’t think the God of Israel is quite as motivated by evil as you think. I get the point of what you are arguing on circumcision. If you see it that way, fine. No problems. You’re a bit a harsh though, aren’t you? How about lightening up a little?’
Four weeks later Daniel finally responded.
‘Ok. I will lighten up a little. I don’t accept those views, so don’t think I will anyway compromise on my beliefs, but I am happy enough to LIVE and LET LIVE. Ok. Sincerely yours, Daniel.’
Saruviel responded quickly.
* * * * *
Melanie looked at the painting she was working on. A lovely green valley on a rainy day, with a Rainbow radiating soft, gentle purity.
She felt happier, now. Much happier. As a sign of a Covenant the Rainbow was simply better. Really, just simply better than any other sign. It worked, God maintained it, and it was eternal. Really, there was NO reason to leave it. No reason whatsoever.
* * * * *
Daniel finished off his watermelon juice. He was happy. Happy. At peace and, finally, having found consolation. His faith had been shown true, and the Devil was giving up. It was unable to tempt him any further, and the Rainbow was now going strong. Thank God for that. Thank God for that.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
“Daniel and Abraham”
3 years since responding to Saruviel’s letter on the issue of circumcision Daniel finally assented to Saruviel’s request for a meeting between the two of them and Abraham. Daniel, who was currently involved in a strong relationship of friendship with the pop singer Melanie, invited her to attend. He had softened, it seemed, in the last 3 years, especially as Melanie had carefully prayed that God would reveal to Daniel what he needed to know. So Melanie, agreeing to come along for the conversation, was present with Daniel as they sat on a seat in the local mall foodcourt, with Abraham and Saruviel who had just joined them. Abraham began the conversation.
‘I am afraid I will have to use some of Saruviel’s logic, Daniel. But please, hear me out.’
‘Go ahead,’ responded Daniel.
‘You see, circumcision was given to be a sign in the flesh – literally marked in the flesh. It wasn’t intended as a sign of violence, but more as a deliberate cutting of our own will to serve the God who had literally marked us as his own for service. The eighth day of the circumcision represents the supernatural order of intervention. It represents a system one step beyond the natural system, a system necessary for the redemption of the natural system which had been disaffected by the choice of Adam and Eve to eat the forbidden fruit. The circumcision, in this sense, represents a doctors cutting of our flesh, Israel’s, to heal the rest of humanity. And that is why it is primarily Israel who receives the Torah law to set a higher example than is perhaps necessary for the rest of mankind to ensure the average standard of mankind’s behaviour rises up to an acceptable level. You see, in the early times, sin was great, and God needed to make corrective surgery in this sense. What you are saying about the natural order being perfect is indeed true, and in the way it was intended to function there would have been no circumcision. But because of the fall of Adam and Eve corrective surgery, of supernatural intervention, took place, and that is what the eighth day circumcision represents. People go to Doctors for surgery. God performed surgery on myself and my male offspring to ensure mankind’s healing took place. Later on, when the Christians took the old testament to the world, so much more was accomplished, and it was never really necessary to try and circumcise the whole church – in fact the church did the job for so many in providing the teachings of holiness necessary in a practical sense. But we remain, as the circumcised, God’s correction of the sin factor. That is what circumcision is meant to represent. I think that sums it up.’
Saruviel spoke up. ‘I think, Daniel, your passion for what you perceive of as the perfection of the created order needs to understand the ability of freethinking humans to choose sin. Because of sin, an intervention by God needed to occur. This is represented by the circumcision. It was never intended by God himself to be a slight against the uncircumcised, which was a problematic attitude which did unfortunately come into Jewish thinking for a while.’
Melanie spoke up. ‘Well, Dan. That seems reasonable. I think that addresses that issue. What do you say?’
Daniel remained silent. He picked up his lemonade, took a sip, and thought it over. ‘I will have to think about it carefully, Abraham, but yes, that is a pretty good answer. It does make a logical idea, what you are saying, so I will think it over carefully.’
‘Please,’ began Abraham. ‘Realize we are not your enemies. We are your friends. It is not something to concern yourself with.’
‘Ok Abraham. Ok. I will think it over.’
It was four weeks later, Daniel had sent an email to Saruviel and Abraham, accepting their viewpoints. He commented that he would continue to think over the issue, but for now their answers were satisfactory. They made sense and were consistent enough with logical truth.
Later, he reaffirmed his commitment to the Rainbow Bible, but also began studying Israel’s Torah a little more. It could prove useful to understand their faith more over the years, and be a little less judgemental. After all, if they were part of God’s plan, then it was important for him to accept that, and perhaps, just perhaps, get over a bit of his personal pride. Yes, he knew he was up himself some what, but had softened in his time with Melanie. Time would produce a better heart in him and, having found a better consolation on an important issue, he put his mind to further study of the sacred texts and examining what was next in his own walk with God. Something would come up, but for now he was happy. A generally content and happy little child of God.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
‘Dario and Andrew – Two Clowns at a Circus’
Daniel and Melanie, now dating, were quite happy together. Melanie had noticed that gradually, over the last few years, Daniel’s symptoms of extreme pride and arrogance were slowly diminishing and he was becoming something more of a regular and down-to-earth angel. But he still pushed it often enough. However, he had redeemed himself in her eyes just the other night when, at the circus, he handled a most difficult situation. A most difficult situation indeed.
‘So when the clowns come on, we run up, pull down our pants, and moon the crowd.’ Andrew, the more compliant and susceptible to his best friend Dario’s often frantic behaviour, just nodded and took a puff on his 47th cigarette that day. The two of them, purchasing their tickets, entered the big tent and took their seats next to a happy couple.
Daniel looked at the two rather drunk looking fellows who had just sat down, eyed them suspiciously knowing them a couple of trouble makers, but gave them no further thought. They had travelled to the ‘Joniquay Star Circus’ and the last thing he wanted was for his date with Melanie to awry. He sipped on his coke, put his arm around his girlfriend and said ‘It should be a good show.’
The show proceeded as circuses do and after the first act on came two clowns. Suddenly the drunkards in front of them lurched to their feet, staggered down to the ring and, dropping their pants and underwear, started mooning everyone. The clowns looked embarrassed but, as nobody seemed willing to do anything about the situation, Daniel rushed down, grabbed one of the drunkards and forced him to pull his pants back up. The other one complied also and he brought them to the side of the ring and out to the exit. He spoke to them sternly. ‘Are you guys literally insane?’
Andrew chuckled. ‘Insane – that’s a good one. Probably.’
‘Insane is as insane does,’ said Dario.
Daniel just shook his head in unbelief and, after cautioning them to settle down, returned to his seat with Melanie. She turned and asked him if everything was now ok and he responded by saying ‘I hope so.’
Yet, as clowns are wont to do, Dario and Andrew re-entered the ring and started chasing the clowns. Funnily, though, the audience was now quite amused by the performances of these ‘Ring-ins’ and started cheering them as they chased the clowns. The ringmaster was looking nervous, but let the situation be.
Dario ran over to the ringmaster, grabbed his microphone, the ringmaster relinquishing it, and said to the crowd, ‘And now my friend, Andrew the Magnificent, shall dive from trapeze into the pool of water.’
Andrew bowed and climbed up the ladder onto the trapeze and waving to the crowd, jumped off.
Of course, he missed the pool and, half an hour later, the medics taking Andrew and Dario off to the hospital, Daniel just shook his head. ‘I should have known those two would be trouble. I should have never given them the money for the tickets.’
Melanie spoke up ‘You know them?’
‘I didn’t want to say anything, but one of them called Dario dates my younger sister. He insisted I give him money for the tickets as we met up here in Joniquay when I went out from the hotel room yesterday. I am so sorry they spoilt the show, Mel. Perhaps we can go again.’
‘Don’t worry about it, Daniel. You acted maturely. You should be proud of yourself.’ She kissed him on the cheek and he blushed, but was still embarrassed about the man who would likely become his brother-in-law.
As Melanie sat reflecting on the night, just having had dinner with Dario and Andrew the night before, she could well understand Daniel’s reservations. ‘Just what am I getting into with this Daniel fellow’, she laughed to herself. Just what indeed.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
‘Master Radcliffe and the 7 Epochs of the Shadow Wars’
Raphael had for so long worried about young Daniel Radcliffe. One of Satan’s old Shadow demon’s had been procreating out in the darklands, focusing on Master Radcliffe as the source of its sustenance in feeding on spiritual food of the legends. Back in Earth days, Master Radcliffe had risen to fame as the star of the ‘Harry Potter’ movies and had become exceedingly popular. Due to this he had been the focus of much adulation and attention from many adoring fans and his spiritual dynamic – his spiritual ego self – had manifested much growth in the ways of attracting people and feeling spiritually exciting. And so ‘Dagraziel’ the Shadow Demon, upon being cast out of heaven to the darklands, a place beyond the ways of life in a sense, had attacked Master Radcliffe in the dark of night and fed, when and were he could, on the spirit of Daniel. He was a hungry demon and he liked the rush. But now, at the end of the First Epoch, getting around to tasks he had long left undone, Raphael had had enough. Daniel had complained to him often, but Raphael’s creed on attacks of the darkness were usually that an angel must overcome such difficulties for themselves if they were ever to truly survive in this thing called life. And so, Dagraziel himself not being the subject of a rebuke, Raphael glided from the heavenlies down to the abode of Daniel Radcliffe, to give him fundamental lessons once and for all how to handle the dark enemies.
He had looked forward to the celebrations at the end of the Epoch, but when Raphael had shown up 7 weeks before the grand culmination to the Realm of Glories first Epoch, to lecture him on overcoming the darkness, Daniel had missed much of the excitement of the final days of the first grand Epoch of the Realm. But that was probably for the best.
He was now familiar with the attacks of Dagraziel, sensing him when he showed up at night, feeding upon him in his dreams.
Daniel had mysterious dreams. Mysterious and strange, often disconcerting dreams. Dreams of glory, dreams of power, dreams of vengeance and dreams of forgiveness. And of course, dreams of love.
But it seemed, whenever he was reaching a climactic moment in his silent lucidities, the darkness would enter in and feed on his very soul. And because of this Daniel had started to fight in his dreams – he had started to become a dream warrior.
It was not easy at first, for Dagraziel laughed at his attempts to fight back and defend himself, but slowly Daniel was getting stronger. Slowly he was fighting off his nemesis and, as the second grand epoch of the Realm progressed, Daniel was sure his demons of the night would one day threaten him no more. How wrong he was.
For one billion years he had struggled – for the entire second epoch Daniel and Dagraziel had been locked in combat – and it seemed the struggle would never end. But then, right at the ending of the second epoch Raphael had commented that ‘You will be getting stronger now.’ And while Daniel puzzled on the cryptic words Raphael spoke with, he believed him anyway.
And then the third Epoch had begun and, in his dream self, he had struck Dagraziel a telling blow and the demon had retreated. And for the last half a billion years he’d had peace. He assumed, now, he would never have to face the horror of Dagraziel again, but he was wrong. For the demon lord had been patiently breeding offspring and was soon to return to Daniel to once again torment him with unending horrors of the night.
Daniel took the sword in his dream self and cut off the head of yet another of Dagraziel’s Demonspawn children. He was used to this battle now and, while he longed for peace, he realized in the words of Raphael that God was making him stronger – making a champion out of him. And so he worked each night, fighting the demons from the pit of hell, enduring his task with pride and strength.
Dagraziel had summoned his whole host, for now, what he had been delaying for so long, was ready to occur. The final devouring of the spirit of Master Radcliffe – a feast they would digest for millennia.
Daniel had been warned and Raphael had told him to gather his forces. And, somehow, in the way he had learned to connect to other spirits in the dreaming, Daniel gathered the strange faces he had met in his long dreamlife together for the war with darkness.
They met on a battlefield – an enormous battlefield. And there were signs of ‘Megiddo’ everywhere, signs which Daniel sensed Dagraziel had put up.
And there they fought, bitter enemies, until Daniel came forth and smote Dagraziel. He took his sword Excelsius, and drove it into the very heart of the demon lord. And while it hissed and spat at him, it slowly and inevitably went through its final death throes, never to bother Master Radcliffe again.
And then, a new epoch, and the dreams of Daniel turned to glory again. And peace was restored to him and, in the trials and tribulations of aeons of struggle, a new man had been born. One capable of leading and forging a world of glory. And in this Daniel found consolation for his lifelong struggle.
For he dreamed not again, for a billion years, and rest touched the heart of Master Radcliffe, legendary dream warrior………………………..
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
40 years they had been going out now. 40 long years, and she was in a dilemma. He, apparently, wouldn’t wed her. He had told her that, for so long, marriage was not for him in the end. That he wanted many relationships with many different women, relationships of friendship and love and that, over eternity, he wanted to see numerous women. And that was Melanie’s dilemma with Daniel. She needed one man – that was the strongest wish of her heart – one loyal and true man, who would not forsake her for the arms of another woman. And so she presented this to Daniel and told him it was time to choose.
‘Ok. Ok. Ok. I get the fucking point, Mel. I get the fucking point. Well, it was good while it lasted. And remember, I will always love you and be your friend. I will always be there for you when you need a friend, a kind face, a heart to share struggles with. I will always be that much for you. But I love easily and I love a lot, and many women have caught my hearts affections. I can only be what I am in this sense, dear crazy funky Melanie.’
She looked at him, nodded softly, and a tear formed in her eye. It would be a hard heart to win, and to keep forever, the heart of Daniel. But he was what he was, and perhaps she should not try to change him.
‘I’ll pick up my clothes tomorrow, Mel. I’ll pick them up in the morning. And remember, it was good knowing you. Give me a phone sometime,’ and then he left, walking out the door, without even a backwards glance……………
She still loved Daniel, but she had never slept with him. Her virginity was intact, and now the future again, and whatever mysteries that held for the life of the angel Melanie.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
‘Melanie and Bag Man and an Undying Love’
She laughed, being gentle. The Joke was coarse, but that was not surprising from Bag Man. That was his way after all.
She had been visiting him again, for several months now, because Daniel had not contacted her since leaving. She had grown accustomed to Daniel’s presence, his strong smell of malehood, his gentle ways with her, his courtesy. His love.
…..But he had left, told her his heart, and she was lonely again. She had friends, of course, but often she wondered wether her fame had purchased them for her. Wether, in fact, that had been all that had attracted Daniel to start with. But, no, he was successful enough, and always claimed to simply like her for her. As simple as that.
She had listened to Bag Man’s tales of his adventures with his darker companions in the early days of the Realm of Glory. When he had first spoken against Raphael and, as an adversary of sorts, risen to power with a strong opposing view of self reliance and rejection of the notion of divine authority. And he had attracted angels and even humans since those times, those who affirmed such beliefs, those who looked to self and not the giver of life.
She sat with him these days, not so much anymore out of a sense of compassion, but rather simply for someone to talk to. Oh, she had an endless supply of emails on her heavenspace page to answer, and they never ended, but few of them really ever expressed a desire to meet her personally, mostly just words of encouragement like ‘You are so Kewl’ and ‘I luv your music’ and the like, and mostly from younger females as well. But that was her target audience, so she shouldn’t really be that surprised.
But, for reason’s unknown to her, she was unable to attract serious men – men who were mature, grown up and interested in a permanent relationship with a proper woman. Apart from Satan for a while, who had given up after she had disappeared from her life, and now showed no interest whatsoever. And Daniel, of course. Apart from him.
She sat there, at the pond, looking at the swans glide across the waters, listening absentmindedly to Satan’s latest plans of universal conquest, to the point of relaxation in many ways, to the point of quiet and gentle melancholy.
She knew, though, what she needed. She needed activity – to get out of the current rut – to do something different. And asking to Satan to accompany her, they came to her vehicle, and made for the mall. Shopping cheered a girl up, and it might get her out of her current malaise. Something to do anyway.
* * *
‘Geraldine. How good it is to see you. But, how do you know Daniel?’
‘Oh, he has been a fan for a long time, and he has emailed me forever, you know. I am here touring briefly in town and Daniel asked to visit with me.’
‘Uh, yeh Mel. A long time fan,’ said Daniel, almost looking guilty at being in the presence of Geraldine so soon after splitting up with Melanie.
‘Mel. Tell you what. Why don’t we go out for dinner tonight. The four of us. Me, Daniel, you and your friend. It would be great to catch up. Haven’t seen you in ages.’
‘Uh, sure,’ said Mel, eyeing Daniel suspiciously. ‘That would be great.’
* * *
They dined in quite an expensive restaurant that night, atop one of the higher towers of their diamond city, but they could afford it. Three of them were quite wealthy.
Bag man was the voice who kept the night rolling, when others were quiet, calmly surveying the others. Calmly jealous, if such a thing could be.
Geraldine and Daniel danced for a while and as Melanie watched them she knew, looking at him, his words were true. He loved many, and freely. But watching him, watching the man who had been her life for most of the past 40 years, she was quite jealous. And suddenly, regretting the freedom she had insisted on, the freedom that had been her right, an inclination entered her head. If she was not willing to fight for her man, than he never really belonged to her anyway. And so, getting up, interrupting the duo, she asked if she might have the dance, and Daniel obliged.
He spoke well with her, and he looked in her eyes. He looked into them, as if peering into her very soul, and an action of choice her heart had made, to be loyal to him. And so he spoke.
‘Can I move back in Mel? Can I? If you need loyalty, if you need just me to stay true to you, then I can make that commitment. I will be with just you, forever if that is what you want.’
She looked at him, nodded slightly, and rested her head on his shoulder.
And they danced. They danced the night away. They danced, happily, blissfully, perfectly. And some hours later, resting on the bed, her virginity finally gone from her, Melanie was now in love. And a love, she truly believed, that would last forever. Always, always and forever.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
‘The Dark Sound of Chaos’
‘Satan! Lord of Misrule, lord of evil, bow down minions of the dark, Raaaarrrrgggghhhh!’ As Satan listened to the sound of the lyrics on his first Album release, ‘The Dark Sound of Chaos’, he was suitably impressed with his malevolence.
‘Fucking cool!’, said the producer simply known as ‘Darkthorn’. ‘You rock, Satan. The album will sell a shitload.’
‘It fucking better,’ said Bag Man. ‘Do you know how fucking long I have been saving money to produce this fucking album? Too fucking long.’
‘Well, it’s going to be a hit, so your Bag Man days are over I think.’
‘They fucking better be.’
* * *
Melanie had often reflected that Bag Man swore quite a bit. Yet, despite his dark heart, she practically insisted that he be Daniel’s best man, and while Daniel had his brother in mind as first choice, he eventually yielded to his bride-to-be’s demands. She was going to be his wife so he must honour her and her choices of the heart. If she wanted Satan at the wedding, then so be it.
* * *
Sitting there, listening to his best man sing songs from his death metal album ‘The Dark Sound of Chaos’ at Daniel’s first wedding, well, it was an experience not quite to be forgotten. Angel Ambriel, over in the corner with his wife Angel Meludiel, was apparently enjoying the music, bopping his head in a friendly and loving manner, as befitted Ambriel’s eternal charm. Of course, Daniel had heard his fair share of death metal over the years, but somehow the dark strains of telling people to worship the lord of evil had never quite caught his heart’s attention. Which was a pity in some ways, as Satan was singing his ass off.
2 hours later, quite inebriated, Satan took to the stage again, and Daniel, much to Melanie’s laughter, began singing along with the title track of the album. People stared, many chuckled and it only seemed to egg Satan on who started banging his head in the mosh pit which formed in front of the stage. Truly, it was a night to remember.
* * *
4 months later, sitting in his new TurboThunderStorm 1,000,000, the hottest sports car on the market currently, Satan was feeling better. He had not been on the streets of poverty for so long after all and while Raphael was still enforcing his obligations, he was now technically allowed to pursue his own talents if they could make wealth for him. And so he had, and was proving mightily successful, which meant things were now right again. As for Raphael, he would see out his contract with him, but he would get his vengeance one day. You could definitely count on that.
‘Master Radcliffe’s Lazy Sunday Afternoon.’
Daniel Radcliffe sat on his couch, having woken up after another late Saturday night partying, wondering were on earth he could get some booze on Sunday morning. The best cure for a hangover, as his crew of wannabe friends always told him, was to get drunk again. But for the life of him he couldn’t be bothered to move from his couch. ‘Uuhh, my head hurts,’ he said to his girlfriend Stephanie as she came in the room. ‘Make it better Stephanie.’
‘I am always telling you, Daniel, don’t drink so bloody much. You have to work on Monday and your body can only take so much of this constant partying.’
‘But I have a reputation to maintain.’
‘It’s your reputation I am thinking of.’
‘Go get me some booze, sweetie. I’ll romance you later on if you do.’
‘Oh, I can hardly wait,’ she responded in a sarcastic tone. ‘Look, whey don’t we have a lazy Sunday afternoon. Not go out and see anybody. Just you and me and some pizza and some DVDs. What do you say?’
Daniel just groaned, so she took a cushion and threw it at him.
‘Ooookkk, Steph. I’ll stay in. But you order the pizza. And for God’s sake turn down that music. I have a splitting headache.’
‘That’d be right. I am hearing things already.’
Half an hour later Stephanie had returned with 4 boxes of various pizzas and a large supply of Coca Cola with enough caffeine to sober him up. He took the pizza, munched it down, and laid out fully on the couch as she put on ‘Titanic 7 – The Long Journey Home.’
‘Jack Dawson. He is sooo romantic. Why can’t you be more like Jack, Daniel. He is a real man.’
‘Jack is totally gay. He hardly even kisses Rose anymore, let alone shag her. I think he likes boys, you know. His type always do.’
‘And what type is that?’ asked Stephanie, trying her best not to smile at Daniel’s humour.
‘The Thriller type.’
‘I know you never liked Michael, but you don’t have to sledge him.’
‘Whatever. You aren’t going to make me sit through the 7 hours of this enormously long epic of absolute boredom, are you? Oh, Rose. You are such a devil. Oh, Jack. I love you Jack. Oh, Rose. If there was only a place for us in this world, were the rich and the elite could not hunt us down and make us their clones. Oh Jack, I will love you always, dear Jack. Oh Rose.’
Stephanie did her best not to laugh at Daniel’s sarcasm, but couldn’t help herself.
Later on, the afternoon gradually passing by, Stephanie was absorbed in Titanic 7 and Jack’s adorations towards Rose. Daniel was half watching it, half paying attention to his twelfth piece of pizza, determined to get as much of it down as possible, when the phone rang. It was Rupert.
They chewed the fat for around half an hour or so and when he finally hung up Stephanie gave him a curious look. ‘What was all that about.’
‘Oh, nothing. Business, you know.’
‘They aren’t doing another one, are they?’
‘You guessed it sweetie.’
‘What, this is about your millionth Harry Potter movie. Don’t they ever run out of scripts.’
‘Apparently not,’ responded Daniel, concentrating on devouring the pizza.
‘I mean, come on,’ said Stephanie. ‘How many possible ways are there of bringing the dread lord Voldemort back from the dead.’
‘I think they have a list of ideas.’
‘And will Malfoy ever make up his mind? Is he a good guy or a bad guy.’
‘He’s indecisive,’ responded Daniel.
‘And that Luna Lovegood. Slut. I know she is coming on to you in those love scenes. I can tell you know. A woman knows these things.’
‘She just has a crush.’
They continued watching the epic Titanic 7 and Daniel decided it was time for a nap.
He dreamed, for a while, and Dagraziel had him on the edge of the Titanic, begging for mercy. But then Luna Lovegood swung down on a rope which magically appeared, kissed her beloved, and they swung away to safety. And Daniel was happy, dreaming away, on a lazy Sunday afternoon.
Chronicles of the
Eternal Realm of Glory
“Melanie and Daniel 2”
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
© 6175 SC by Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly and ‘Universal Faith Assembly Books’
‘I am so fucking jetlagged.’
‘Watch your language,’ nudged Melanie, as Daniel almost fell off the airport waiting lounge seat.
‘Were the hell are we anyway?’ queried Daniel, with bloodshot eyes.
‘You don’t know?’ queried Melanie.
‘No fucking idea.’ She nudged him again.
‘We are in Sandranvania. The capital city, Sandravon.’
‘Sandravon? I don’t think I have even ever heard of the bloody place.’
‘It’s new,’ she responded, turning another page of her magazine. ‘Only a few centuries old. I checked the details before the band arrived.’
‘You do that often?’ he asked, with no better question on his mind. ‘Check up on new cities?’
‘Only when our band is touring somewhere new. Were we haven’t been before. The other girls and I always like to answer well at interviews and we make mention of things like this in our concerts.’
‘Oh,’ said Daniel, but probably couldn’t care less anyway. He was well and truly bored shitless after 4 fucking centuries of solid touring to promote just one bloody album anyway.
‘You didn’t do this in the old days, you know. 4 centuries of this. It was a 4 month getaway, and then that was enough for ages. But now – 4 bloody centuries.’
‘Things have changed, Danny boy. We are committed now. VERY committed. We now plan on pursuing this music as our primary career eternally. The girls and I have worked out in true ‘Viva Forever’ fashion, that life never ends, and that eternity never ends, so as the heavenlies go on expanding forever, we will increase our tour every new time to every new city. Constant, continual, eternal growth. Girl power, Danny Boy. Girl power.’
‘You are a freak, Melanie Chisholm. A freak.’
‘Takes one to know one, Daniel Daly. Takes one to know one.’
After a while Daniel spoke up. ‘My novel. Morning Stars. The Chronicles of the Children of Destiny volume 1 epic. It is still number one, you know. World wide. Still the all time best seller.’
Melanie looked at him, seriously. ‘I know, Daniel. I know.’
‘Yes,’ he responded, with bloodshot eyes. ‘But I do fuck all to promote it, sweetie. Fuck all. I worked, once, for a while. Got the series finished. Got it published. Promoted it. And then did nothing more. Nothing. And it is still fucking number one.’
Melanie scratched her head, ignoring his boasting. Eventually she took issue with him. It was a vain attempt at humility and splendour. ‘Nothing? Really? What is it that you do on Google every Friday? Every single Friday, around 4 in the afternoon, forever. Literally forever. I have never seen you miss.’
He turned to look at her, and said ‘fuck’ under his breath. ‘Well, okay. You have got me. I post a regular add for the book every week. So sue me. Google groups are free.’
‘Yes,’ she says. ‘But you do promote it. I have read the messages. You put on one of the short stories every time, from a list of about 400 that I have seen. Yes, I have been reading it for thousands of years now also. Then you give a few hundred words of autobiography from the past week, and you post your website links, and you post the message to 15 specific Google groups that you never budge from. THAT is what you do, Danny. You have never changed from it.’
He looked guilty. ‘And you think that does it, do you?’
‘100%, Dan. 100%. You dish up a constant supply of new work with your autobiography, and you have a heck of a readership. I see it in the webhits those groups get. And Google is everywhere on the net, all over heaven, and there are literally sextillions of souls who read those groups on a daily basis. It explains everything.’
‘I am just lucky. I have a priority address for postings. My message usually stays on the right hand bar tab for 2 or 3 days, gradually dropping down the list. That sort of exposure, with those numbers, adds up to everything in the end.’
‘Yes. I do know Daniel. I do know.’
He smiled, took a sip of a flat coke, and went back to his grumbling.
‘What city are we in again?’
‘Oh, shut up,’ responded Melanie.
Geraldine took out a hanky, blew her nose, and looked at the mess. ‘Good God. That was up my nose.’
‘Charming,’ said Victoria, handing her a bin.
‘It’s a perfectly good hankie,’ said Geraldine.
‘Bin!’ exclaimed Victoria. ‘Believe me, Geraldine – you can afford it.’ Geraldine humbly obliged.
They were at the next show on their list, the eternal Spice. 5 British girls who were showing the world that Girl Power could do it better, an eternal theme for the group. Wether they, in truth, actually meant that or not was indeed another question, but when you were onto a good thing….
‘The problem with men,’ began Emma, sitting in her white skirt, looking ever so ‘Emma’, is that they just don’t know what they want.’
‘Oh, they know what they want alright,’ said Victoria, patting her butt. ‘And they usually know how to get it.’
‘It is just that they are too stupid to properly appreciate it,’ said Geraldine, which made the little group of 5 girls laugh.
Emma continued. ‘No, seriously. They just don’t know what they want out of life. They spend forever changing careers, trying to be a hotshot at this or that firm, before finally moving on and then, when they are finally secure and you can rely on their income, off they go dreaming of forming a business of their own. They are never bloody satisfied.’
‘Now,’ began Melanie Brown,’ while girls certainly can do it better, it is very hard to match the ego of men when it comes to their ambitions. But, of course, they set big goals, yet reality is far more frugal.’
‘True,’ said Geraldine.
‘Oh, I don’t know,’ responded Victoria. ‘David usually achieves his goals after a while. And what about that Daniel fellow of yours Mel. Apparently he is still number one all time. In fact, I saw his book yesterday, at the newsagents at the airport. Sitting in the corner, with a few others of his. Nice cover – basic, but dramatic.’
‘That’s Daniel,’ said Melanie. ‘Always a trier.’
‘What I think,’ began Melanie Brown, ‘is that despite all their flaws, and shortcomings, and their utter reliance on the fairer sex, we still couldn’t live without them.’
And the group all nodded.
* * * * *
They were at yet another airport lounge, sitting there, waiting on their flight. Melanie always wanted to arrive early and, despite Daniel’s constant bemoaning that they simply use the ‘Spice’ plane and have enough of this regular carrier nonsense, which Melanie and the girls usually refused on the grounds of trying to come across as everyday girls in touch with the people, Melanie was still in an upbeat mood.
‘So, where are we now?’
‘Same country, new city. I won’t bother telling you its name. You will learn it eventually I suppose.’
‘I suppose,’ responded Daniel.
He, finally out of boredom, pulled a rubiks cube out of his jacket pocket, which he had purchased at the airport newsagents when they had arrived in their current city, and looked at it. He knew how to solve them, generally, and had mastered it aeons ago, but never kept at the technique, and these days was a bit fuzzy as to how to actually solve the thing.
Melanie looked at it. ‘You think you can solve that then? You’re not that bright, are you?’
‘Huh, I’ll show you,’ and for the next 45 minutes he twisted and turned the thing, eventually getting 2 sides, before giving up.
‘Told ya,’ she said, smiling, and Daniel just moaned.
‘So, were to next, beloved?’
‘The other main city of this nation. It is an interesting one, you know. About 70 main families populate it, all of them descended from one couple who wanted to form their own nation ages ago. For a long time that was all there was – just their family, but in recent millennia they have opened up somewhat and allowed free movement. But mostly the same family. A very strange project.’
Daniel thought that over. ‘Interesting, Mel. I will think over that. Food for thought for a while.’
‘You do that, she responded, turning another page in her magazine.
‘You know, Melanie. I kind of fancy that Daniel fellow of yours.’
Melanie turned to Geraldine. ‘You are kidding aren’t you? He has the appeal of a slug.’
‘Then what are you doing with him,’ responded Geraldine defensively.
Melanie stared at her, but said nothing. She sat there, in their dressing room, the other girls doing their makeup and things, before eventually responding. ‘Look, Geri. What I said was too harsh. Perhaps I was just jealous. Remember, he’s mine. Look, the way Daniel often comes across is in a very rigid and legalistic way at first, until you get to know him. He is actually quite liberal on many issues, but is very careful with the reputation he seems to think he has.’
‘Oh,’ said Geraldine. ‘Well, I was only remarking that he is cute. Kind of guy I could go for, if he was available.’
‘But he’s not, so don’t even think about it.’
‘I won’t,’ said Geraldine, but wasn’t promising anything.
Later on that night, after the concert, sitting alone in the dressing room after the girls had all left, waiting for Daniel who shouldn’t be too much longer, Melanie thought on her husband. Daniel Daly – the man who had finally taken her virginity. What sort of guy was he, really, in the end? Why had Melanie bothered with an author, albeit a successful one, to hang around and fall in love with. Was it his stability? His success? His charms? He had a fair degree of them. But was there something else. After a while she concluded she didn’t really know, but a soft voice in her heart said ‘He will probably love you, in the end, more than anybody else anyway,’ and that seemed to satisfy Melanie’s question.
* * * * *
‘We are in Prontington!’ he exclaimed, with something of a victory noticeable in his voice.
‘Oh, well done,’ responded Melanie, to Daniel’s triumph.
‘And the city has over 1 billion inhabitants.’
‘Yep. There you go again,’ she responded.
‘Yep,’ he said, and proceeded to take out his rubiks cube and puzzle over it.
After a while he spoke up. ‘But what about genetics? Isn’t that a problem?’
She said nothing for a few moments, before finally responding. ‘Uh, Genetics, a problem? For who?’
He finished with his Rubiks cube. ‘Well, them, I guess,’ he said, pointing at those gathered in the waiting room.
Melanie frowned. What was he on about? ‘Do you care to explain?’ she asked him, putting down her magazine.
‘All these people. If there are only 70 major families, and they are all related, shouldn’t there be heaps of genetic problems. I mean, they are all inbreds.’
‘Oh,’ she said, finally catching on. She looked around them, at all the people, suddenly looking at their faces, looking to see anything of those potential genetic defects. There didn’t seem to be anything immediately noticeable.
‘I mean, sure, maybe the original couple had very good and diverse DNA for this project. Maybe it wasn’t a problem for the original couple.’
‘I guess,’ she responded, returning to her magazine.
‘Yes, that was probably what it was. Good DNA. A suitable match. The kids never ended up having problems with interbreeding.’
‘And if the parents had sex with the children,’ said Melanie, cautiously, still looking at her magazine.
‘Fuck,’ said Daniel. ‘Never thought of that. Adam and Eve all over again. Incest – a game the whole family can play.’
Melanie smirked at that. A funny one from her beloved.
‘Family get togethers could be a thing, though. I mean, who do you leave out? You could end up inviting half the bloody neighbourhood.’
Melanie had to again smirk at the comment.
‘Oh. And birthdays for the family members. Who DON’T you send a card to? Could be bloody expensive.’
‘I guess so,’ she said, sobering up somewhat.
‘I guess blood is thicker than water, after all,’ he finished.
‘Yes,’ she said, as he returned to his Rubik’s cube.
‘I probably wouldn’t want to do that kind of thing. That kind of experiment. Probably not me,’ he finished, and puzzled on his cube.
She sat there, not wanting to, turning her pages of her beauty mag, but she thought on that anyway. A kingdom – a country – full of her offspring. Her own seed, and nothing but. Surely she would never contemplate such a thing. Surely never.
‘Some things work. Some things don’t. We are supposed to work it out in time and, I feel, inevitably most of us usually do.’
The two of them were in yet another airport of this quite large country, in a smaller city this time, but the band wanted to be extensive after all. Daniel had been sharing, in response to Melanie’s recent question pertaining to the concept of ‘Sin’ as to what Daniel felt on the subject.
‘Of course, Morning Stars, with the dialogue between Michael and Saruviel, addressed something of the core issue. Your own way as opposed to God’s way. God’s way wins, in the end. You will be even admitting it. He already knows, that is all it is. He already knows the fullness of morality. For most of us, our early years are found simply in arguing with him. And then, as I said, we work out on our own issues which God doesn’t address too much that some things work well for us and some things just don’t. And that is the way it is.’
‘But why should we agree with God? I mean, what makes him right? How are you so sure he has the truth on every moral issue.’
Daniel looked at her, a little bit taken aback at what he felt was a slur against his lord, but took it on the cheek. Melanie wouldn’t have meant it like that. ‘Look, see it this way. The being who is Almighty God – Yahweh, as we mostly know him as – designed the human body, the human mind, the human psyche. He knows, in all intricacy, the depth of intellectual questionings our minds are capable of, in all their synaptic glories. He already knows – he has already had those thoughts, and he has already worked out the truth of the deepest mysteries we could ever hope to plumb the depths of. He has already done what we crave as our own original glory of thought.’
‘So you say,’ responded Melanie suspiciously.
‘Yes. So I say,’ responded Daniel, returning to his Rubiks cube.
They sat there for a while, Daniel working on his cube, Melanie working up to a reply. She had one coming – in the guts of her – and wanted to now have a go.
‘But how do you know, really, that he has bothered to work everything out properly? How do YOU know? Has he told you? Personally?’
‘I read the book of Job, Mel. Probably the first spiritual book I ever completed. It has all the answers on that one.’
‘Yes. I know the text. You would quote that. But who wrote it?’
‘It was still, whatever you might say on that issue, placed into the canon. It still ended up in what came to be regarded as his word. And, whatever its origins, to me it addresses the core of the issue. God made it all – he already knows. Who the hell are we to think we have originality in us? Huh?’
‘But aren’t we made in his image? Don’t we have something new to offer him?’
He looked at her for a few moments and, then, thinking that over, responded a little more carefully.
‘Well, maybe. Maybe. Yes, we are made in his image. Yes, we are his children, with lives of our own. I don’t think we surprise him very much in what we do, because he knows each of us by design very carefully, and we respond in the way we are supposed to. But, perhaps – perhaps there is a spark of originality in our knowledges which he never looked into per se but, having said that, I don’t think we are ever going to really surprise him with that anyway. He probably has everything figured out by now, if he didn’t so already.
She didn’t dispute him. She wouldn’t, now. He had answered carefully and kindly. But, she was not really sure if she agreed and, in truth, not really sure if she disagreed. It was an interesting question. Very, very interesting.
Geraldine and Daniel were backstage, Melanie still signing autographs, and the other girls had disappeared for the night.
‘So, you like ‘Spice’, I take it?’
‘I think I have expressed that to you plenty of times previously.’
‘Oh, you know, Dan. Tastes change. People move on – to something else – something new. Time marches on and all that.’
‘I’ll put it this way,’ responded Daniel. ‘I never get sick of oranges. And while I like apples and pears and watermelons too, I still always like oranges as well. They are good for you, taste nice, and a part of a natural diet.’
‘So that is what we are, is it? Oranges?’
‘Oh, you are a definite fruit salad of flavour, dear Geri. A definite fruit salad.’
She smiled on that point.
‘So, what are your favourite fruits, then? Your favourite bands?’
‘Too bloody many to mention. At the moment ‘Panic at the Disco’ is on my current iPod. A large selection of their early stuff. They impressed me, once, with a couple of videos from an early album. I put them on my listening routine from time to time. Of course, Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, Dio, Madonna, Britney Spears and of course Spice are among my most regular tunes. Iron Maiden, Evanescence and Roxette also make the list a heck of a lot. They are still probably my favourites.’
‘I see,’ she said. ‘The oldies.’
‘Oldies but goodies. Oh, heck, I have heard pretty much all of it by now, and bands grab me from time to time with new sounds. But for what I am into personally, the stuff I had in my first 60 to 70 years of life was about enough for eternity. I haven’t dabbled seriously with great listening to too many bands since that time. Didn’t think there was much point. I’ll buy a new CD, but unless it really strikes me as deserving more attention, I will stick to what I have.’
‘Yes, I am sort of the same way,’ responded Geraldine. ‘A core of favourites makes up my playlists, and after that, well, you know. Whatever is playing on the radio.’
‘Exactly,’ responded Daniel.
* * * * *
‘You and Geri,’ she said, out of the blue, as he continued to puzzle on his cube, sitting again in a typical airport for this nation.
‘You and Geri. You both seem friendly.’
Daniel was flabbergasted at that. What WAS she on about.
‘Umm. Me and Geri have gotten along well for a long time. Is that a problem?’
She turned to look at him, almost spoke, but bit her lip and stared at him. She then turned back to looking into space, and gazed up at the clock on the wall briefly, before returning her gaze to nothing in particular.
After a while, Daniel returning to his cube, she picked up a magazine, and started humming to herself. Whatever was on her mind, Daniel didn’t really know.
It was the next airport, after another sold out show, they were sitting there again, and again he was still trying to work out the cube, when she brought it up again.
‘Geraldine. Is there…. Is there anything I need to know, Daniel?’
He looked at his cube. 3 sides, now. He had mastered getting about 3 of them with effort. But 4, 5 and 6, which he knew now would come automatically when he had gotten the fifth anyway, were still an ongoing challenge.
‘Uh, no. Nothing I am aware of that you need to know about me and Geraldine. Don’t really know what you are driving at, sweetie. But me and Geraldine are not hiding any secrets from you.’ And as an afterthought he added, ‘Oh, and no. We don’t have any surprise birthdays planned or anything like that. At least nothing that I am aware of anyway. Now, why do you ask?’
She turned to him, looked into his eyes, almost into his soul, but said nothing. She just stared at him, right into him, then turned away, back to her magazine.’
‘No reason,’ she finally said, and that was that. Nothing more on the issue eventuated.
‘What about LMFAO? Are you shuffling every day?’
‘Am I what?’ responded Daniel, a big smile on his face.
‘Are you shuffling?’
‘I guess fucking so,’ he said, still smiling. ‘Yeh, I know the band. I bought a CD once. Ages ago. Actually, no. The same CD, but a lot of times. They have others, but I only listened to them early on. There is just their early CD with ‘Shufflin’ that I listen to on a regular basis.
‘Do you like them?’ persisted Geraldine.
‘I thought they were quite original, yes. Yeh, I like them. Not completely my type of stuff, but some of the rare dance music I would bother with. They are ok.’
She reached into her bag, pulled out a CD single of LMFAO, and as they sang along and did a little dance, Melanie, who had been finishing the removing of her makeup in the corner, just stared at the two of them, but said nothing. After all, in Daniel’s own words, there was nothing to say. Was there?
‘We really should try this live. I would love to, you know, but the band won’t sell us the rights to perform live. It is there exclusive domain.’
‘A lot of bands are like that, I’ve heard. But you can’t blame them, can you. It is there living, in the end. They have to look out for their welfare.’
‘I am sure they can afford it. It will only help them in the end.’
‘But that is not how everyone sees it. Some think you are stealing someone elses audience, in a funny kind of way. Even if it is your own you are singing to.’
‘All I can say is thank God for the Public Domain song database.’
Daniel nodded at that. The Public Domain song database of heaven was, primarily, a host of song material which God himself had organized, communicated to through a number of angels, and had put into the form of an online database accessible by everyone. There were well over 10 Billion original songs available for everyone to utilize in their own live performances and for the release of any particular CD they may want to release for their own performing ambitions. The database was part of God’s plan for every soul who wanted it to be able to eventually make something of an impact into performance, and even a career if they needed it, in the field of music. With the reality of copyright, unless you had been amongst the first numbers to have gotten the best tunes from the data range capable over a standard 80 minute CD, which was a practically infinite variety of sounds, language and other strange communications, some quite evil, but that also included, necessarily, music, then you were ultimately left without original material to make a career from. The early birds caught the worm in that sense, and now, millions of years later, all the stuff which was cool and hip had basically been utilized in the full data range available from the full code of a CD, in all interesting enough variations. Funny that – how the entirety of the human language and history of speech – everything you could ever hope to say and ever would – already theoretically existed in the capable data range of an 80 minute CD which, really, only needed to be computed in a run, printed off, and ultimately listened to. God, supposedly, knew it all though anyway. Knew the entirety of the knowledge from such an idea, and thus knew the entirety of knowledge. It was all happily at peace in the soul, mind and heart of the creator, so the theologians constantly maintained.
Later on, back in the hotel room, ready to leave in the morning, Melanie hadn’t spoken for a while. Daniel knew something was up – something wasn’t right. Melanie had an issue with him, possibly something to do with Geri, but he wasn’t sure. It might be something else entirely, and maybe Geri had just set it off. He wasn’t sure, but presumed he would find out soon enough.
‘Do you like me, Danny?’
‘Yeh, you are sweet, Geri. Really, if it wasn’t for Mel, you would be the kind of girl I would go for.’
She nodded. They were alone in the girl’s dressing room, after the show, the other girls having left. Melanie had been there, looking at Geri who innocently was doing her makeup, and Daniel said he had to pee, and went to the toilet in the dressing room, Melanie telling him she would find her own way back to the hotel in a taxi on her own for some quiet breathing space just before he closed the toilet door. He had come out of the toilet, found Geraldine still there, and had said ‘Well I’ll see you later,’ before she had asked him to sit down. And now, so he felt, she was chatting him up.
‘So you like me,’ she said, and put her hand on to his leg, and slowly moved it up a little towards his crotch.
‘Oh, fuck Geri.’
‘Exactly,’ she responded.
‘But I can’t. I can’t. I’m married – happily.’
‘We’ve done it before,’ she reminded him.
‘I know,’ he said.
And before he could say anything she had whipped of her top and undid her bra, and sat there with her tits showing.
‘They look good, don’t they Danny? I have been working out properly.’
He dared, and put his hand forward and grabbed one. Just then the door opened and Melanie walked back in saying ‘I just forgot something,’ and caught them. There was fire in her eyes. ‘You fucking bastard!’ she exclaimed.
‘Uh, it’s not what you think, Mel.’ Geri quickly put her bra and top back on, grabbed her purse, and walked past Mel, not before Mel hissed ‘Bitch’ at her, leaving a very difficult Daniel feeling guilty as hell.
She just stood there, staring at him, and Daniel looked down, feeling like a piece of shit. Eventually Melanie softened. ‘Well, do you like her then? Is that just it? You like Geri?’
‘It’s nothing like that. But I think I know what you were saying at the airport. From how Geri has been acting towards me recently. But, really, there has nothing been going on. Just then was it. She just whipped off her top and I couldn’t help feel her tits. They looked so good.’
‘Oh,’ she said, and came to sit down next to him.
There was a part of Melanie C which had mercy. Which was soft, and forgiving for such things. She knew Daniel was only a guy in the end, only human, and so she forgave him for it. She noticed, though, he had a strong erection. ‘Do you want me to take care of that, Danny?’ she said, indicating his crotch.
‘Uh, fuck.’ And so they did.
* * * * *
Daniel slept well that night, his dreams alive of all five of the Spice Girls, there hands and arms wrapped all over him, his crotch being paid particular attention and, the second time he orgasmed in his dreams, it was in the most blissful of positions, all 5 girls around him, his night being made. Besides him Melanie was restless. She couldn’t sleep. She was worried. Would he leave her? Geri and him had dated a long time ago, before they had been married. Presumably they had slept together, but Geri never said anything about it. Never mentioned anything since Mel and Dan had got together. But did Geri really still have feelings for Daniel? And did Daniel feel the same? Would she lose her man? She didn’t even want to contemplate such a reality. Losing him now, after all this time together – she couldn’t even hope to think about starting again with another man. That much would be impossible to her – literally impossible.
She stared at the ceiling, noticed him thrusting a little next to her in his sleep and that he had come again. Was he in the arms of Geraldine in his obviously happy dream? Was he getting lucky?
They had been together for so long now. Almost as if her life had been Daniel’s life in a funny way – like they were one flesh in truth, as scripture also decreed between a husband and a wife. She felt she knew him so very well, all his strange ways, all his strange thoughts. He was a gentle man, in most ways. Quite humble. And faithful. Usually, very, very faithful. Had they done this before, he and Geraldine? Had they been together behind her back? Was Daniel hiding a hidden relationship which had never really ended? She hated to think so but she was suspicious.
Eventually, she found sleep, and, in her dreams, giant heads of Geri and Daniel seemed to float around, laughing at her, before changing into giant slugs. ‘Ah, justice,’ she thought to herself, as she laughed and dreamed on.
It was the next city, in the airport, Daniel had just mastered side four, and exclaimed as such. Melanie was generally over her concerns with him and Geri. He had claimed, the following morning, that no shenanigans had been going on whatsoever and that throughout there whole marriage he had remained faithful. ‘Yes, I have looked at women. That is unavoidable. But I have never cheated,’ and she believed him. He was telling the truth as well.
She sat on her airport seat, her magazine in her hands, staring off into space, Daniel just having exclaimed his victory in mastering 4 sides of the cube, and all was, generally well.
The tour had been going well, so far. Four centuries of it, touring now the outer limits of the heavenlies, having seen so much new stuff. But that was life in an ever-expanding world. Always something new.
She thought about that, and the girl’s devotion to tour forever, as heaven expanded, always to a new show, to a new venue. Always a new fan to sign an autograph for, a new CD cover to sign, a new hand to shake. Onwards, forever onwards, the might of the Spice attack. This was her life, now, and she knew it. She had committed to it. And for the most part it was satisfying. Sure, she had plenty to do, and she was never bored. Daniel was a great companion, and the girls were eternal friends – as a group they just seemed to work.
But, deep in the centre of her heart, there was something. Something which, although, was definitely saying she was fine and happy and had no real problems to address, also shrugged its shoulders and said, in a funny kind of voice, ‘Well I don’t know’, when she asked of it the serious question ‘Is there anything more to my life?’ It was her conscience, embodied in a little miniature version of Melanie, sitting in her heart, telling her what she should and shouldn’t do. It had always been there and, for a long time now, had not complained much. But, over the last 5 or 6 thousand years, slowly, she had noticed it. A malaise – a malaise of the heart – a little bit of it which said ‘There is still something more for Melanie C to find satisfaction on’. And so she continued to question that little conscience of hers, which was always reluctant to give her a proper answer, but which, now, that a situation between Daniel and Geri had been resolved, seemed to be standing up and saying it was time to deal with something – something which her heart had been putting off for a long time.
And so, sitting there, staring off into space, she suddenly stood, looked at Daniel and said ‘You know my mobile number by heart, don’t you?’
‘Ok. Don’t call me. Not for a while. Not for at least a decade. And tell the girls that the tour will do for now as far as Melanie C is concerned. They can go on without me if they want to, or end it here. I will be busy. And don’t even bother asking, ok Daniel. Don’t even bother asking.’ She looked around, at the airport, the people, and everything, and turned back to a very confused looking husband. ‘Well, I’m off. I’ll see you back at home eventually.’ And she turned, and walked away.
Daniel Daly, husband to Melanie Chisholm, singer and Spice Girl extraordinaire, could be a very passive man at times. And he had an odd way of dealing well with very difficult situations. But this much was a little bit of a challenge to him. But, above all else, he trusted God and the choice of heart which God had brought into Daniel’s life to be his wife. So, with a trillion objections and a trillion questions to ask her, instead he sat there, let her be, let her walk off on her sabbatical of whatever she wanted, and, glancing up at the clock, realizing he had her mobile number if necessary, turned back to his Rubiks cube. At least the tour was fucking ended for him, he thought sarcastically, and puzzled on his cube.
4 years. 4 bloody years, and to keep faith with her he hadn’t even had a bloody wank. He really needed some attention and the thought of ringing up Geraldine was even on his mind. But, no. He wouldn’t cheat. He couldn’t cheat.
He looked at the telephone book in front of him. Melanie’s mobile, written down in black ink, staring at him. He had been waiting for her to ring, when she was settled wherever she needed to be settled, doing whatever she needed to be doing. When she was happy. When she had found herself. But she had never rang and as weeks turned to months and as months turned to years, Daniel was starting to wonder if he had lost her. Wether she was ever coming home.
He looked at the number, swore at himself for caving in to her, and picked up his phone and dialled. It rang and rang and rang and rang out. ‘Fuck.’ But he knew that it was getting through, as the ring tone was working. Was she using the phone? Was she near it at the moment? Was it sitting on a shelf somewere, disused? He put the phone down, took a sip of Coke, and decided to ring again at 11 that night. Give her time, if that is what she needed. Maybe she had heard the call, but was nervous. Maybe she saw the number, and didn’t want to answer. Maybe. He would wait. See what the night would bring.
* * * * *
‘Uh, yeh. Is Melanie there? This is her phone.’ The lady on the other end of the phone went silent for a while and then said ‘Who is this?’
‘Daniel. Daniel Daly. I’m her husband.’
‘HER HUSBAND!’ the woman exclaimed. ‘But, but. She’s not married.’
‘Oh, yes she is. Unless she has divorced me without me knowing it,’ he said with a tone of anger in his voice. ‘Now is Melanie fucking there?’
‘Oh, ok. I guess she will talk to you. Don’t swear, ok. This is a chapel of God. We don’t tolerate such language.’
Daniel waited and thoughts flashed through his mind. ‘Were the hell was she? Was she caught up in some bloody religious cult? What the heck was going on?’
It was about 5 minutes later, and he could hear her in the background saying she didn’t want to talk to him, when she finally picked up the phone.
‘Mel. Where the hell are you?’
‘I’m at peace, Daniel. I have finally found peace. With God. I am complete, content. I don’t need anything anymore. Just me and Jehovah. That is all I need. All I want.’
Daniel swore under his breath. ‘It’s a cult, isn’t it? Don’t tell me, you have got yourself caught up in a fucking cult.’
Melanie said nothing initially. Eventually she responded. ‘Peacekeepers of Jehovah are NOT a cult. They are a mainstream religion, which has separated from the world in the main for purposes of peace and escape from the humdrum of it all. Sure, people say all sorts of things about us, but we are NOT a cult. Just an escape. A place of peace.’
Daniel swore again, a little louder this time. ‘Yes, I have heard of them. And they are far from bloody mainstream. Way out in left…no, excuse me. Way out in RIGHT field. They are lunatic fundamentalists who hate everything except God and the holy bloody Torah.’
‘And what is wrong with that? Isn’t that your own faith after all?’
‘I don’t approach it the same way. No, no it isn’t my faith in that sense. I may be a Karaite Noahide, but the Karaite Noahide community actually IS very mainstream and accepting of ALL of God’s children. We care about everyone in heaven, work in all the major charity organisations for helping disadvantaged people and people recovering from illnesses. We support the lonely people’s brigade, and bring dinners to people to chat with them when they just need a friend and someone to talk to. We are there for everyone. But the last thing we bloody do is go off to a cult and separate from the community believing we are the special bloody holy ones. WE DON’T FUCKING DO THAT, MELANIE BLOODY CHISHOLM.’
‘Well we DO!’ she shouted, and hung up.
Daniel sat there, stunned and, eventually, swearing again, put down the phone. The Peacekeepers of Jehovah. The bloody peacekeepers of Jehovah. For heavens fucking sake, he swore again, and got off to get some fresh air and swear some more.
It was the following night, around 11. Daniel had calmed down and, having done some research on the Peacekeepers of Jehovah and realizing, whatever else, they would take Torah seriously and work to be calm about everything, he called the number again. This time Melanie answered.
He waited for a few moments. ‘I lost my temper last night. I apologize.’
‘You are forgiven.’
‘Well, I would like to come and visit you, but I also respect your privacy and your desire for peace, as you put it. I do need to know this, though. Will you be staying with them forever, or will you eventually come home.’
There was silence for quite a while. Eventually she spoke. ‘I will one day come home. I won’t ever divorce you, now. Never. You and I are one flesh. That is meant to last forever.’
He nodded. This sort of talking didn’t surprise him. It was what cults could often be like.
‘I won’t argue with you. When you are ready, come home. I won’t go anywhere. I will remain at home permanently. I won’t even go out very much, but order the food from Woolworths for home delivery, and order all my other stuff online. Friends can come and see me. I will wait here, at home, even if I have to wait a million years, ok. Even if I have to wait a million years. I love you, Mel. I love you.’
There was silence, and he heard faint crying.
‘I will be home one day, Daniel. One day.’ And she hung up.
He put down the phone, looked at the clock, and sighed. It could be a long wait. It could be a very long wait.
* * * * *
About 300 years later, Daniel was really getting used to his own surroundings. Perhaps his religious duty of his Googling on Fridays kept him going in many ways, but perhaps it was just life, with how he was simply alive from moment to moment, which was all that pushed him onwards. But, no, there were other things. Geri came often and they talked about Melanie. The girls had visited her once, early on, but had been thereupon asked to respect her privacy, and that had been the end of it. Melanie needed the peace she was seeking, and that was that. And so Geri would visit Daniel, usually on a Saturday afternoon, and they would sit there, play monopoly or Risk or Scrabble, or some other board game or Jigsaw, and be best friends, but never lovers. Daniel couldn’t even entertain the thought of such thing with the commitment he had made to Mel. Geri was his light at this time, and once she kissed him on the cheek and looked in his eyes, but he just had to turn away. He couldn’t, and she knew it.
And then 300 years turned to 3000, and it had become a basic life, sitting there, waiting for his bride to return, sometimes going to the front window, looking for her, hoping, anxious. But she never came. She never came.
He would cry a lot at nights, very often for the first couple of thousand of years, and then he would do nothing. He would sit there, numb, look forward to Saturday when Geri came over, and then breathe new life with the presence of Geraldine.
And then, one day, Geri gave him a ring. What was called an ‘Eternity’ ring. She told him, then, she would be his friend forever. His confidante forever. That she would always be there for him, and that she loved him, and that was that. So he kissed her, and, looking into her eyes, he knew she loved him. He took her, to his bed then, and they lay there naked for a while. And then they made love, and he found some peace. His virginity of over 3000 years was broken.
Geri moved in after that, and stayed with him. For all intents and purposes, she was his mistress, but that was that. What else could he do? Melanie wasn’t coming home? Was she ever coming home? It could be another 3 million years before she may even talk to him. But he knew he would wait. He knew. But, at nights, when Geri was there, he thanked God for Ms Halliwell, and her company, and the cold part of his heart was warmed somewhat, as he waited, patiently, for the return of his bride.
6 AM. Time to get up. Prayer at 6:30 for an hour. Scripture reading for an hour. Then breakfast. Another day in paradise.
Melanie, daughter of God, had been with the Peacekeepers, now, for about 200,000 years, or there abouts. And, in fact, it had now taken up a large percentage of her living history, which was something she had intended for a long time. In her philosophy, since joining the group, she knew she needed this stability, this divine focus, to enshroud her heart. And, furthermore, she had committed to an eternal relationship with the Peacekeepers. Not constantly – not at once. But every few million years she would take a sabbatical of about 200,000 years with the peacekeepers to give her the spiritual nourishing and food she needed to cope with her life. To live through all the highs and lows a Spice Girl was faced with.
But today was a special day. Today was Monday, and she had completed her obligations she had imposed on herself the prior Sabbath. She had spent one more day, Sunday, saying farewells to her group and now, Monday afternoon, having clutched at them just a little bit longer, she was ready to leave. To get back to the chaos of it all. She had found her God – Yahweh Jehovah – in the centre of her heart, and that was all that she needed. God centred living.
Now, the trouble. But she was ready. Daniel had sworn allegiance, that he would never leave. She questioned wether, as the spirit and her dreams seemed to be telling her, that Geri was indeed with him now, as a Mistress. But that was acceptable in the end. Daniel was only human. He needed another wife, and Hagar and Keturah were never far from Melanie’s thoughts on the issue. The concubines of Abraham had demonstrated men’s humanity to her.
She wouldn’t ring. She would surprise him. Come home, find him, kiss him, and get back into the routine. She would see just what would be.
* * * * *
Geri stared at her, and then, catching herself, opened the door to let her in.
Melanie walked inside, came into the living room and, suddenly, Daniel walked in from the kitchen saying ‘Who was that Geri?’ and stopped, staring at Melanie, who was dressed in a long white dress, with a suitcase in white, and white shoes, with an appropriate white hat on.
‘Fuck,’ said Daniel, staring at her.
Melanie stared at him and, suddenly, there was a torrent of emotion in her heart. She couldn’t speak, though. She wouldn’t respond yet. She sat down, put the suitcase by the lounge seat, and looked towards the TV Set, still not speaking. Daniel stared at her. Geri came over, stood next to Daniel and he turned to her. ‘Come with me into the kitchen,’ and they left to chat.
Melanie could hear them, speaking urgently, and Geri’s voice rose a little before Daniel calmed her down. Shortly they both reappeared. ‘Right,’ said Geri. ‘Well, good to finally see you Mel. You can catch me later at my place, if you wanna come around. Seeya.’ And she stared at Melanie in her white garb, picked up her handbag, and left through the front door.
Daniel stared at Mel for a while, realizing his wife had finally, and quite suddenly, returned. But, coming to himself, he came over, sat down next to her, and said. ‘Well, what do you know.’
The following morning, Melanie having slept in the guest room, she rose early, prayed, but only for about 10 minutes, which she had already planned as her routine away from the peacekeepers, and read a chapter of Torah. And then she had gone into the kitchen, found something suitable to eat and was sitting in the living room, the radio on a classical station, softly playing, sitting there, waiting.
Daniel rose around 9, came in, looked at her, and scratched his head. She was back. What had happened to her, though. She was so – so – passive. Just sitting there, hardly even blinking. Like a stone, like a rock. Is this what the place had done to her.
He went into the kitchen, grabbed a can of Coke, and came back and sat down in a large chair, opened his can, and looked at her. She just looked ahead, looked at him from the corner of her eyes briefly, and then continued staring outwards.
He took a sip, put down the can, and came over to sit next to her.
‘Look. I can tell you have changed. I can see that. Its obvious. But I…. I haven’t much. And me and Geri. Well. Well, we have been together for a long time now. A few thousand years after you left she moved in. And we have been an item in that sense.’
‘I won’t divorce you,’ said Melanie, without looking at him.
‘Hold on, sweetheart. Nobody ever said anything about divorce. Geri understood that when she moved in. I was devoted to you. I AM devoted to you. Ok. Ok.’
‘Good,’ she said, and said nothing more. Daniel just stared at her, but nothing more was forthcoming. Eventually he shrugged, sipped on his can and stood, looking at her. ‘Ok. You seem not to need me at the moment. I have not been out of this house for the last 3,000 years straight, apart from the yards. I have kept my commitment to you, hardly ever leaving. But I need to get out of here. You can come with me or you can stay here, but I am going over to Geri’s and we are going to see a movie and get some fries and burgers and do shit until late. Don’t expect me home till 11.
She said nothing, staring into space.
Daniel was frustrated. He wanted to say something. He wanted to say he loved her, but couldn’t. Not yet. The time wasn’t right yet. Not yet.
‘Well, ok. Seeya.’ And looking at her, waiting on some sort of response which never came, he disappeared out the front door, found his car and hoped it would run, which it did, and disappeared over to his mistress’s home.
* * * * *
Melanie had looked through the photographs of them together all that day, looking at how good they looked together, at how much in love they had been. And then, around 11, Daniel came in, a tiny bit intoxicated as she could smell it on his breath, but sober enough to talk with. ‘Fuck, Melanie,’ he said. He had obviously forgotten. ‘Look, sweetie. We’ll talk properly in the morning,’ and he stumbled into his bed, and fell down on it, soon snoring away.
She heard him, and coming in, she put a blanket over him and lay down next to him, searching for sleep. It would just take time, she knew that. It would just take time.
* * * * *
The following morning he seemed better. As if he had started adjusting to her. Getting used to her new demeanour.
‘So, what was it like? All that time with one group? How did it change you?’
They were at the breakfast table out on the verandah, with muesli and orange juice. He seemed in a better mood. He seemed good with her.
‘Oh, it was life changing. I’m going back you know.’
‘Oh, not for a very long time, ok. Not for a very long time. Perhaps 2 or 3 million years. But it will be a similar sabbatical. For about the same time period. It is in my routine now. I will do it forever.’
‘Oh,’ he said. ‘Ok. That’s ok. That’s fine.’
She nodded. He had accepted it, then.
He sipped on his orange juice, stared at her, and smiled at her warmly. ‘You know Melanie. You are still the love of my life. When all is said and done, it is still just you babe. It is still just you. I can accept your peacekeeper ways. I have gotten used to the idea now, ok. I can accept it.’
‘Then we will have peace,’ she said, tilting her orange juice to him, and he smiled.
Geri was sitting on Daniel’s lounge, looking at the TV, while Melanie was away shopping. Suddenly Daniel walked in from the kitchen and went to his bookcase and picked up 3 books. She noticed that one of them was his Tanakh – his Jewish Bible – which he was never without, and the other two books were books on Judaism. He took them, walked out the front door, and was back within a few moments, the books not to be seen.
Out of curiousity she asked him ‘Uh, what did you do with the books?’
He turned to her. ‘It has been building up. For a long time, Geraldine Halliwell. Perhaps for a number of lifetimes. But what I have seen in Melanie is the end of it. I will NOT touch that Jewish Bible or religion EVER FUCKING AGAIN. It is SHIT.’
‘Well, Amen to that,’ responded Geri. Daniel nodded, went back into the kitchen, leaving a very perplexed looking Geri Halliwell.
* * * * *
‘So you are no longer a Karaite Noahide?’
‘Not a Karaite one. No. Just a Noahide. That was true historically.’
‘So you reject God, then?’ continued Melanie.
‘No. Just the Jewish Bible. I have seen what it has done to you, and I have had so long seeing Jewish people for what they are – pride filled ‘Chosen’ people, who really think they are too good for the rest of us, and that we should kiss their asses. It is what they have always been like – separatists. I don’t want to fucking know anymore, Mel. I don’t want to fucking know about that shit ever fucking again.’
‘Oh,’ she said, and said nothing more.
* * * * *
Later that week Melanie had taken her Jewish Bible and also thrown it in the bin. Daniel was her husband, and was faithful to him. If this would put a problem between them, then, in the end, she chose her love. She chose the man who had been faithful to her.
* * * * *
It was 40 weeks later. Melanie had sent a letter to the ‘Peacekeepers of Jehovah’ saying she wouldn’t be back. That it was over with, and not to bother sending her the yearly annual. She had let go, now. She had moved on.
And then Daniel, one afternoon, tinkering away at his PC, had written down some dialogue on ‘Universal Faith Assembly’ which had been the name of a religion he had registered a long time ago, but never used. He showed it to Melanie, she nodded, and that was it. It was the ‘Book of Universal Faith’, four simple verses, and Melanie agreed that they would follow whatever it brought – for better or for worse. And it read:
The Book of Universal Faith
Unity. Many coming together as one, linked by an idea, a belief, a purpose. For we are all one, daughters and sons of Eve and Adam. And the idea? Connections, to those within humanity who best meet our hearts needs, wants and desires. Connections, built with trust, respect and patience. Connections, which grow into love and appreciation. For Universal Faith is to appreciate all of God’s children, those who fill this universe, and make connections with them, one by one, to fully satisfy all the desires of knowledge that these connections can impart to us.
Humanity is like one body, with many parts. All of us are offspring of Adam and Eve, eternally genetically linked. Yet, as science teaches, in the 700 Trillion unique genetic designs within humanity, there are those designs which connect to us most appropriately and in the most stimulating of manners. Yet, every design has its purpose in the creators mind, and each design, each and every human gone from us and yet to be has a purpose in our life, bringing those aspects of knowledge, friendship, kindness, blessing and love we so truly desire.
Eternal connections. That is the purpose of our life. To find and build eternal connections. Friendships which endure not just for a day, a week, a month, a year – but friendships which endure throughout the endless eternity before us. Each of these friendships must be valued and treated with respect, for they are eternally our source of joy, love and comfort. And to begin these connections, seek out those whose focus is on the eternal – those whose belief is in eternal life – for such people have a focus on Yahweh and the gift of eternal life he has promised them, and thus are well endowed to bless you with the connections to bear the fruit you desire with all your heart. So seek ye the connections with those whose focus is on the eternal.
And the completion of things is the moral heart. Value those things which speak to your heart, and remember the purpose those others which do not so speak to you have in the hearts and minds of others. For not every gift of knowledge, at first, speaks to every unique human, but we find our way slowly and carefully along our eternal destiny, learning, loving, growing and living in the hands of our eternal and great God and Father, slowly appreciating every aspect of the Infinite and its place and purpose in the eternity of creation.
‘Amen,’ said Melanie, and that was that.
Over the next few years, having posted the information to the web at http://universalfaithassembly.angelfire.com , Daniel started gaining that rarest of commodities – actual living converts. Slowly, gradually, the assembly took form and, having started writing a new series of angel books for the assembly called ‘The Chronicles of the Eternal Realm of Glory’, which was set in a new universe, different to his first two sagas, a universe more like their own, Daniel made sure it was known that the series was to serve as the spiritual literature for the Universal Faith Assembly. Apart from the very basic laws and teachings from the ‘Rainbow Bible’, which was the first 10 chapter and the first 9 verses of the 11th chapter from the Hebrew Bible, which was pertinent to Noahides, and the ‘Book of Universal Faith’ to organise the main idea of the Assembly apart from its religious obligations to God, the ideas and doctrines for members of the Assembly were to be derived from their own life walk and, by way of assistance from the founder of the assembly, whatever teachings they found value and merit with from the ‘Chronicle’s’ which were to serve as the spiritual fiction for the assembly.
Would it be a success long term? Only time would tell.
* * * * *
Daniel had concluded that God had done it. In hindsight, it was God’s way of resolving things for Daniel – for coming to a necessary solution before the problem became insurmountable.
Melanie would likely have been eternally dedicated to the ‘Peacekeepers of Jehovah’ and, inevitably, Daniel’s frustration over this, despite his love for Melanie, would have torn their hearts apart.
And, in the end, seeing Karaite Judaism, in all its fundamentalism, for what the Peacekeepers followed, taught the heart of a long-term Noahide that, in the end, the Jewish Bible was just for that – Jews. They were suited to it. And, unless you were ever going to dig right in and actually convert eternally to this faith, then forget about it. Don’t even read it in the end. Let it go. It was Jewish history – a Jewish family legacy – and while they did indeed promote it to the world, in the end it was only for one definite ulterior motive – the proclamation of their own name and glory and the expansion of their family, religion and nation.
The Kingdom of Noah was NOT the kingdom of Israel. He had even heard Noah himself preach as such at a Noahide conference once. His people in the Noahide community were called NOT to the people of Israel, and the glory of Hashem’s son – they were the everyday world of humanity, the real life, regular people, in all their humanness and all their frailties. They were the REAL people, as Noah put it, the salt of the earth, which humanity needed to balance itself against the religious zeal of God’s son Israel.
‘Sure, God loves religious people,’ Noah had said once. ‘They are trustworthy and do as they are told. But there is an inevitable clash, as we know so well. They put so much emphasis into an idea such as the fulfilling of a Mitzvot or the strict observance of a Sabbath day, or dietary regime, that they forget there plain humanity. And I think, in the end, Hashem knows this truth. Yet, for better or worse, they are his priestly nation, and that is how they function. But that is not for us, children of Noah. That is not for us.’
The more Daniel thought on those words, the more truth he gained from them. It was a timeless statement on the reality of life in relation to God’s people Israel. He was a priestly nation – he lived in a world of his own – and while he would attempt to minister his values to mankind, in the end Exodus taught that he was specifically a priest to Almighty God and relating to the everyday fold of humanity didn’t always work that easily. Sure, they knew what they were supposed to do in terms of moral issues because of Israel’s teaching, but they couldn’t really fellowship with them that easily – torah forbade that. And that is were Noahide faith became the reality of how people in the real world fellowshipped, learned the truths about God, and got along well with their fellow mankind. It was the practical realities of Noahide faith which appealed to Daniel and how they, as Noahides, WERE the people, and not separate to them, which made sense in the end. Something which worked practically – not airy fairy philosophy.
‘Life just fucking goes on anyway, Melanie Chisholm. It just fucking goes on anyway.’
Melanie, dressed in a red skirt and black T-Shirt, looking very attractive, sat at the breakfast table, chewing on toast with vegemite, drinking orange juice, looking at Daniel, who had been up all night on the Net, seemingly emailing everyone.
‘And why does it go on, anyway?’ she queried.
‘Because, even after you have exhausted all your religious virtues, life still bloody goes on. It still bloody goes on.’
‘Unless you kill yourself,’ she said. And then, matter of factly, ‘Or someone kills you.’
She continued chewing on her toast, staring at him, raised her eyebrows in a ‘wow I’m smart’ motion, and Daniel stared at her. He took a sip of Coke, burped a little, and eyed his beloved.
‘Well, perhaps we can make that a rule of the Assembly then. Don’t kill.’
‘Oh, so it is rules is it, Lord of Hypocrisy? The very thing we deride blessed Israel for. Rules.’
‘Mmm,’ said Daniel, and took a sip of Coke, staring at his adversary.
‘That is more a life principle, than a rule. How shall we put it – maybe an imperative. Live and let live.’
‘Imperatives? Is this a new religion?’
He stared at her, took a sip of Coke, and picked up his Rainbow Bible which was sitting on the table. He turned to chapter nine and read it out. ‘And if a man kills, surely they are to be put to death, for in the image of God was man made.’
Melanie nodded. ‘So that is the fundamental idea of Rainbow Bible Noahide faith then. Don’t Kill?’
‘And don’t eat blood.’
‘Right,’ she said. ‘I’ll remember that. Sounds like rules, though, don’t it.’
‘The only ones which matter, sweet cheeks.’
‘I must tell that to Dracula.’
And Daniel laughed.
* * * * *
‘Who the hell cares about religion, anyway, Daniel. Real life ignores that stupid stuff. Look, divorce Mel and shag me. You’ll be much happier in the end anyway.’
Geraldine, her hair up, looking ravishing, smiled at him.
Daniel sipped on his Coke, chewed on his toast, and said ‘Yeh. Yeh. I should. Really, I should.’
It was the following morning, at the breakfast table, and Melanie was out the back yard, praying. Suddenly she appeared. ‘Geri? What are you doing here?’
‘Oh, speaking wisdom to your husband. I think he really is starting to see the light, you know.’
‘Oh, really,’ responded Melanie, sitting down, and pouring some orange juice for herself.
As she buttered some toast, and put some honey on it, Melanie stared at Geri who sat there, occasionally sipping on some bottled water, looking as radiant as ever.
‘Are you trying to steal my husband?’ There, she blurted it out. Daniel looked guilty. Geri took out a nail file, began filing her nails, looked at Melanie and smiled, but said nothing.
Melanie munched on her toast, staring at the two guilty parties. ‘You won’t get him, you know. Daniel is faithful. AREN’T you Danny Boy?’
‘Yes Mel,’ he said obediently.
Geri continued filing her nails, looking radiant. Daniel did nothing but groan.
‘So, what is the plan today, Danny?’ queried Melanie. ‘We have finished our tour of the ‘UFA’ assemblies.’
‘Yep,’ responded Daniel. ‘706 heaven wide established fellowships. All doing well. All happy. Yep.’
‘Yes,’ said Melanie. ‘OUR project. To keep faith with Jehovah. To show we ARE loyal.’
‘Yes,’ said Daniel, and groaned some more.
Melanie continued munching on her toast.
‘I don’t have a religion,’ said Geri, blurting it out like that. Daniel and Melanie looked at her. ‘I used to be Roman Catholic, you know. And mum took me to the Jehovah’s Witnesses somewhat as a youth. But when I got to heaven and found out that was wrong, I got completely over it. You don’t need it, you know. It is just a crutch. Just live by the laws of the Civic council. The laws of the land. That is all they insist upon anyway.’
The Civic council was the judicial body which had drawn up the universal legal code which was mandatory behaviour for all citizens of heaven. It was a basic civil code, but universally enforced, and generally accepted. Even in heaven there were a lot of non-religious people.
‘Don’t you want to know God?’ queried Melanie.
Geri just tilted her head, as if that was answer enough, and said nothing more. Eventually she spoke.
‘Ok. I pray a few prayers once every few thousand years. Just to say hello, and ask him for a few things if he can find the time. But that is the end of my devotions. He has never bothered me about it.’
‘Sounds fine, Geri. That is all you will ever need for an eternal life. And even less if you want. He doesn’t mind. As long as you get along and are happy.’
Melanie looked at Daniel upon those words. ‘Then why do you push the religious agenda so much?’
Daniel took a sip of Coke and turned to Melanie. ‘I get a kick out of it a lot of the time. It gives me something to focus on. Oh, and I do like God a lot. He means a lot to me. He speaks my type of spiritual language. But, believe me, I couldn’t care less if the next man in the street doesn’t give a shit. That is his business. Sure, I will tell him about it, see if he is interested and all, but if he doesn’t give a shit, then that doesn’t bother me. Live and let live and all.’
Melanie nodded. ‘So it is just because you derive personal meaning that you pursue it.’
‘I love God, as I said,’ responded Daniel. ‘He is a good guy to me.’
‘Oh,’ she said, and said nothing more.
The little group sat there, Daniel occasionally sipping on his Coke, Melanie finishing off her toast, and Geri filing her nails.
Geri turned to Daniel and said. ‘Good to know. Your attitude on God and others. Good information. Thanks for telling me.’
‘Your welcome,’ responded Daniel.
Melanie looked at Daniel and then Geri and shrugged. ‘Such was life,’ she thought to herself.
‘I am so fucking jetlagged.’
‘Watch your language,’ nudged Melanie, as Daniel almost fell off the airport waiting lounge seat.
‘Were the hell are we anyway?’ queried Daniel, with bloodshot eyes.
‘You don’t know?’ queried Melanie.
‘No fucking idea.’ She nudged him again.
‘We are in Brantolford. It is the capital city of Bradondya, a smaller newer nation.’
‘Oh,’ he responded, and took out his cube.
Melanie stared at it. ‘Did you ever get all 6 sides?’
He sat there, stopped his twiddling, and turned to her. ‘Uh, no actually. I don’t think so. Not from memory. Only when I originally solved the thing a long, long time ago.’
‘Right,’ she said. ‘Watch out, though. Get all six sides, and I might disappear over to the Peacekeepers,’ she said, with a grin.
‘God forbid,’ he responded, going back to his cube.
Melanie looked straight ahead. Here she was, 3 more centuries into yet another tour. Yet another tour. Yet another tour. She looked at the clock up on the wall, and looked at her mobile. She then, knowing Melanie C, stood, turned to Daniel, and handed him a piece of paper with her mobile number written on it. ‘Make sure you don’t forget it. This time I WILL contact you eventually, ok. But I am off again. It’s NOT the peacekeepers. But I don’t want to say anything more. I’ll let you know when you can visit.’
He looked at her, almost said ‘For fuck’s sake,’ but refrained. And then, she looked around, turned to him, waved and smiled, and she was off. Off on yet another little adventure of Melanie C.
* * * * *
It took Geri exactly 3 weeks after the rest of the girls brought a quick end to their tour to come over to Daniel’s, move in, and start shagging him again. This time Daniel was less concerned. A lot less concerned. He just missed Melanie, now. Just missed her, and prayed that God would take care of her. But, apart from that, he was alright. He knew Melanie was off an another of her missions in life – something which may even occur yet another time. But, perhaps, this was expected. He hadn’t liked the idea of the peacekeepers, and she needed a void to fill with some sort of focus. Daniel was now starting to understand that. He would be far less judgmental next time because of it.
When Geri said she was pregnant Daniel said ‘Fuck.’ ‘Well, yes,’ responded Geri. ‘We did. That is how it happened.’
‘But we have always been careful,’ he objected.
‘Not the last time. You didn’t think it mattered anymore. I think you forgot I could theoretically get pregnant. You know, fucking is what causes it Daniel. It is how babies are made.’
‘Yes. Yes, I know,’ he said distractedly. The baby was on his mind. ‘What shall we call it?’
Geri smiled. ‘Well, if it is a girl, how about Geraldine? And for a boy, I like Sebastian. I have always fancied that name.’
‘Uh, sure,’ said Daniel. ‘You can choose.’
‘Then they are the choices.’
‘Okely Dokely,’ he responded, and sighed. A father – again. He would be up late with crying babies, nappies and never get any rest. But, in his heart, he wasn’t disappointed. He loved Geraldine, and the final sealing of a child… Perhaps that was the right thing in the end, anyway.
‘Oh fuck. What do you want?’ said Daniel, staring down at little Geraldine.
‘Oh, you want your mother.’
‘Not bloody likely,’ Geri yelled out from the next room. ‘Your turn Danny.’
‘I am sure the kid wants its mother. It needs to feed,’ he yelled out to Geraldine.
‘Use the bloody bottle,’ she screamed, the scream of a woman who was not getting enough sleep.
‘Yes, the bottle,’ he said, looking around. Suddenly there was a ringing noise, and as Daniel searched around for the bottle, ignoring the noise, hoping it would go away, he simply couldn’t find the bottle anywhere, and the baby continued crying.
‘For fuck’s sake,’ he said, and picked up the baby and started patting its bottom, which brought an end to the crying.
‘What did you do?’ yelled Geraldine.
‘I picked her up. She’s happy now. Now were is that phone?’
He fished around, found his mobile, answered and said ‘Daly’s baby service. Can I help you?’
‘Baby service?’ queried the voice on the other line. ‘What is going on there?’
‘Oh fuck. Melanie. Hold on a second, ok.’ He went into the other room, and looked sorely at Geraldine. ‘It’s Melanie. Come on, take the baby.’
Geraldine put forward her arms and Daniel gave her her daughter, which cried momentarily, but soon shut up.
Daniel walked into the other room, sat down, breathed slowly, and said, ‘Right. Melanie. Where are you?’
‘Not far from you. One city away. I have been all along.’
‘Then why didn’t you bloody tell us?’
‘I have been busy. But you can come now. Do you have a pen? I’ll give you the address.’
‘Uh, wait a minute,’ he said, as he scrounged around for a pen and writing pad. ‘Shoot,’ he said.
‘The address is 67 Nottingdale Avenue, Parsington, in Citydale.’
‘You’re in Citydale, huh. Look, I can be there tomorrow afternoon if you like.’
‘That’s up to you. Don’t rush, though. I don’t want you having an accident.’
‘Uh, right. Ok. Well, I will come when I can then. Give me a day or so, but I will ring just before I arrive. Let you get tidied up and so on.’
‘Ok. I love you Daniel.’
‘I love you to, hon.’ she hung up.
Daniel walked into the bedroom and looked at Geri. ‘Mel. She is in Citydale. She has been all along.’
Geri nodded, nursing the baby. ‘Are you going to visit her?’
‘Yes. It’s been arranged. I’ll go in a few days.’ He stared at the baby and, realizing he would have to bite the bullet eventually anyway, put in. ‘Do you want to come along? With Geraldine?’
Geri looked at him, looked down at their child, and looked back up. ‘Ok. She will find out eventually anyway.’
‘Yes she will,’ agreed Daniel.
* * * * *
‘Her name is Geraldine. Like her mother,’ said Daniel, handing the child to Melanie. Melanie looked at the child, and let it suck on her little finger. She turned to Geri. ‘So you have your prize in the end, anyway.’
‘Don’t sue me, ok. You already knew that when you are away, doing whatever it is you do, I hang around Daniel. We get along well. He loves me, you see. Properly. Eternally. He is a committed friend. I don’t mind sharing a kid with a man like that.’
Melanie looked at Geri and looked at Daniel. That much seemed evident.
She turned to Geraldine. ‘Hewwo little Geri. I am your auntie Mewanie.’ And the baby burped, which made the group laugh.
Melanie looked up at Geraldine. ‘Ok. When I am away. But ONLY when I am away. He is MY husband after all.’
‘Noted,’ said Geraldine, looking down at her child with the loving eyes of a concerned mother.
Geri had taken her daughter to stay in a nearby hotel from were Melanie was living, leaving Daniel and Melanie to catch up.
‘So what is this place?’ queried Daniel. ‘It doesn’t look religious? What gives?’
‘It has a little bit of a religious basis, sort of. They do use the bible a little bit in encouragements and so on. But no, it isn’t specifically a religious organisation. It is called ‘The House of Broken Hearts’. I am both a worker here, and I also get a little therapy, as they sometimes call it, as well.
‘The House of Broken Hearts?’ queried Daniel. ‘What do they do?’
‘Minister to broken hearts. Let people know they are loved. A house of love and healing. A place to recover from broken romances and hurt friendships. From divorces which have failed, or from estranged family. A place were people can come and have their broken hearts mended through the loving counselling of concerned peoples. Oh, and I get paid as well. There is a sliding scale for our fees, but we often get very good donations from past recipients who have been very grateful for our services.
‘Oh,’ said Daniel. He thought on that for a few moments, that Melanie seemed to again be searching for a meaningful course of action in her life, to connect to people, to help people, and suddenly it only made him love her more. ‘Does it suit you?’ he queried.
‘Oh, I think I was made for this work,’ she responded. ‘It is perfect for a person like me. And, as much as I hate to say it, people usually get a buzz out of sporty spice ministering to them. The organisations heads say I have been an untold blessing for them.’
Daniel nodded. Melanie had found purpose – meaning. He knew he should not be jealous, but overjoyed for her. But he also knew, with the look in her eyes, she would be here for some time. So he asked a fundamental question.
‘Can you do this back in our home city?’
She looked at him, and seemingly had an answer. ‘Maybe. They DO have offices there, yes. And I would be perfectly welcome. But I usually work best when I am totally committed to it, without other voices. Without other concerns.’
‘So you don’t want me around when you are doing this?’ he asked.
She looked at him, but the look on here face said it all. She spoke after a while. ‘But you have Geri when I am away, anyway. Remember?’
He nodded. ‘I guess so, Melanie. I guess so.’
‘Yes,’ she agreed.
So there they were, Daniel, Geraldine Senior and Geraldine Junior – a family – of sorts. Of sorts.
Daniel was in two minds about the whole situation, having a mistress and having a wife, away, in another city, working for a living on her own, away from her man. And also approving of the situation. Could this be right?
He looked at Torah for a while and, realizing that Abraham indeed had one wife and two concubines, really one latter wife in Keturah after Sarah had passed and also how Jacob had had two wives and two concubines. And of course, how could you ever forget Solomon on the issue.
In the end, the situation was relatively normal enough. Wasn’t it? Wasn’t it? He concluded, though, that the slight degree of discomfort on the issue was simply his indoctrination since his religion of birth – Roman Catholicism – and the traditional ways of his parents. In Catholicism a man married one wife. This was the traditional way of his church of upbringing and, psychologically, perhaps some things never changed. Sure, while he was doing it with only tacit approval from Melanie it was indeed what he really wanted, but her disapproval or, rather, her lack of complete support, always seemed to justify the situation in a reverse way of thinking. But with her support he had to now question was what he was doing really legitimate? It was popular in heaven, certainly, his lifestyle – especially amongst some religious groupings. Did that make it right? Did that make it wrong? He didn’t have an answer yet and, so, in prayer one night, he prayed a short prayer for God to help him make sense of it all.
* * * * *
‘Daniel. Life doesn’t always go according to plan. And wouldn’t it be terribly boring if it did?’ ‘What is your point Geraldine?’
‘Don’t sweat the situation. It works well enough. I don’t mind, really. I can have another man if I need to. I don’t – at the moment. I am happy with your friendship. We are cool together. We like each other. I gave you that eternity ring for a reason, and I meant it. You are the one for me to be there in those special times.’
‘Well, as strange as it might sound, she likes to go off and do her thing a lot of the time. Seems to be something which has developed in her way of thinking. But you need a woman, don’t you?’
‘Yes,’ he said. ‘I don’t really like to masturbate unless a woman is watching, and usually involved – and I haven’t been to a prostitute in a hell of a long time.’
She looked at him with a smile. ‘Good to know, Danny. But that is exactly my point. You need a woman. So when the cat is away, the mouse will play.’
He looked at her and nodded. ‘I guess so,’ he finally sighed. ‘I guess so.’
Melanie had, after about only 3,000 years this time, finished up with her first stint at House of Broken hearts, and come home. Geraldine, duly, grabbed her stuff, kissed Daniel on the cheek, and scampered. Young Geraldine, their daughter, was well married now, and living a few cities away.
‘So, Mel. Home at last?’ Melanie, sitting in front of the TV, watching a nature documentary nodded a little.
Daniel stared at her. She had gotten back a few days ago, and they hadn’t chatted yet, seriously. He wanted to clear up some things.
‘Mel. You know I love you, don’t you.’
‘Good. And, believe me. That will never change. And, well. I really don’t ever want to divorce you. You know that as well, don’t you?’
She nodded, but continued staring at the television set.
‘Ok. Well, it’s like this. In the bible,’ and she turned to look at him.
‘Yes Daniel. What about the bible?’
He gulped. ‘Well, in the bible, Jacob, who we of course know is Israel, well…’ he left off.
Melanie stared at him, and then made a connection. ‘He had two wives. Is that what you are saying?’
‘Uh, kind of.’
She turned back to the TV. ‘Go ahead, then. I don’t care. I am used to the idea now.’
‘You don’t mind? Really?’
‘If Geri doesn’t, then I really don’t care anymore. Have it your way.’
‘Oh boy. Thanks, Mel. You’re a lifesaver.’
* * * * *
When Daniel had proposed to Geri, she laughed and said ‘You aren’t serious, are you? What, has she agreed to a divorce?’
And Daniel went on to explain his biblical faith and Geri just stared at him. But she wouldn’t answer his question after that, but just went silent. Daniel only presumed she was thinking it over.
It took a few years, and eventually Geraldine came around. ‘Look, Danny. No, ok. No. We have an eternity friendship between us, but I won’t play second fiddle to Melanie as the second wife. That is not my way, ok. I am also sort of strict about those things, as bizarre as that might sound. If am going to get it right, then it would be done right. We shack up with each other – we are good friends. On that basis it works for me, but nothing more ok. I don’t need to legitimize that kind of friendship. You might, but I won’t agree. So don’t ask it of me, ok?’
‘Ok Geri. Ok. I get the point.’
And that was the end of it for a while.
* * * * *
They were at another airport, sitting there, when Daniel blurted it out.
‘It won’t work, you know. Our arrangement. It won’t work for me. I don’t feel comfortable with it.’
Melanie stopped her magazine, thought about what he was saying and said ‘The situation with Geri, you mean?’
‘Then what do you propose to do about it?’
He turned and looked at her, kissed her on the cheek, and said ‘Well, I have already chosen you. I won’t change on that, ok. I won’t. If Geri won’t marry me, then there is nothing more I can do about the situation. But I won’t sleep with her anymore. I won’t do that. It’s cheating. She is not, whatever it is supposed to be anyway, which has always been a little vague, but she is not a concubine. And she is not a wife. And she won’t be. She is a mistress. And I won’t have one of those. In the end, over the long haul, it will affect my reputation. People are aware of it and while I hear that nobody really minds, there are a few chuckles. And I won’t have that.’
‘So what are you going to do about it?’ asked Melanie.
‘Break it off. Completely. Not our friendship – never that. Me and Geri are forever as well. But I won’t sleep with her again. I chose you.’
Melanie nodded and returned to her magazine. But, shortly, she put her hand into Daniel’s and left it there.
Geri understood. In the end, she sighed, kissed Daniel on lips and said ‘Oh well. You know what you are missing out on honey?’
‘Its just the way it has to be,’ responded Daniel.
‘I guess so,’ she responded.
* * * * *
‘So, what next Mel? Now that work is over with, what next?’
‘Not much for a while. Just at home with you. A tour, eventually. A comprehensive one. I won’t sell the girls short this time, though. I’ll complete it.’
‘I am sure they toured enough last time,’ he put in. ‘Sales are good enough.’
‘Oh, sales are excellent,’ she responded. ‘In fact, never better. The tours we have done in the outer areas have really paid off in that respect. All sorts of new fans.’
‘And that is how it is done?’ he queried.
‘There are reasons, Daniel. Things I have learned about heaven, and the future. About the eventual cost of living in a place like this.’
‘What do you mean?’ he asked. ‘Its not that expensive.’
‘Not at the moment. Not for millions of years more either. But one day, being mainly the centre of heaven, costs will larger. And getting around will be more challenging. I have been reading about it. In some of Raphael’s literature on the subject. ‘The Future of Heaven’ as he writes about on his website.’
‘I’ll have to look at it,’ responded Daniel, sighing.
‘You probably won’t need to worry. I mean, with your googling work, being faithful to it. You probably won’t have to worry ever again. You have that. Morning Stars – it won’t ever stop selling. I am convinced of that.’
‘I know,’ he responded. ‘I mean, sure, I have googles of cash at the moment anyway, and enough investments in shares and property here and there. We are lucky like that – plenty to live on.’
‘One day, though,’ she responded. ‘One day this city will be full of fat cats, though. Take my word for it. One day, when our city neighbours have all realized their own dreams and bought all their own shares and made all their own money….. the price of hired labour will be astronomical.’
Daniel looked at her, catching on. ‘Oh,’ he said. ‘Yes. I see what you mean.’
‘Which is why, Daniel, we need a reliable income. If we want to stay in the centre of heaven, that is. People keep on learning how to earn more money and, no matter who you are or what you have done in the past, you will need a good income to make it in this world. Especially were we live – in the centre. And so me and the girls will tour forever, to ensure our quality of life continues.’
‘Forever,’ she responded. ‘And the work with the Broken Hearts foundation is a reason as well. Your job, though. That is googling away on Friday afternoon. The same old same old – for all eternity. That way you will never need to worry again.’
‘That much I can do,’ he responded.
‘Good to hear, Daniel Daly, good to hear,’ and she kissed him on the cheek.
‘Danny, Danny, Danny.’
‘Oh, fuck. Kesha.’
‘How are you going, Danny, Danny, Danny. Tell me, are you going to Kiss and Tell? Geri has been suggesting all sorts of things to me.’
Daniel looked over at Geri, seated innocently, brushing her hair. The girls were being supported by ‘Kesha’ on this tour, and the girl was almost coming on to him, it seemed.
‘There is NOTHING going on between me and Geri, Kesha. There NEVER has been, and there NEVER will be.’
‘Oh, really,’ said Kesh. She looked at Geri, who smiled back, and turned back to her man. Melanie, doing on her makeup, looked at the two of them through the mirror and smiled.
‘So there is no little Geraldine floating around out there? No Ginger Spice Love Child?’
‘Not that I am aware of,’ responded Daniel, lying through his teeth.
‘You’re sure of that?’ she said, with cute smile on her face. ‘No Love Child?’
‘Mmm,’ said Kesha. ‘This could be interesting.’ She turned to Geri, who smiled, picked up her phone, and dialled and shortly was talking to someone. Kesha turned back to Daniel.
‘So there are no confessions you want to make? Danny, Danny, Danny.’
‘Not that I am aware of, Keshy, Keshy, Keshy.’
‘Mmm.’ Just then, in through the dressing room door, Geraldine walked, with her big top of red hair, just like her mother, and came and kissed Geri on the cheek and started chatting with her. Kesha turned to Daniel and said ‘Are you sure you have nothing to confess, Danny, Danny, Danny.’
Daniel had a smile now. ‘Yeh. I’m sure.’ Just then Geraldine junior came over, kissed Daniel on the cheek and said ‘Hi Dad,’ and walked back over to her mother.
Kesha opened her eyes brightly and said. ‘Oh, what? What was that? Dad? Dad? What gives?’
‘Oh, fuck off Kesha,’ he said under his breath, and she grinned like a Cheshire cat.
* * * * *
‘I’ll get that Kesha. I’ll get her.’
‘What was that?’ asked Melanie, as they were sitting in yet another airport, in yet another country, on yet another tour.
‘Uh, nothing Mel.’
‘Don’t get her pregnant this time,’ said Mel, and Daniel instantly looked very innocent.
‘What are you possibly suggesting?’
‘I know Daniel Daly,’ responded Melanie Chisholm. ‘He has his eye on all the popular girls. Believe me, I HAVE noticed. You’ll have offspring from all 5 Spice Girls if you possibly can, and then some. I mean you probably fancy Avril Lavigne and Rihanna and Mandy Moore, not to mention Britney Spears.
‘Yeh, Britney is hot,’ responded Daniel.
Melanie laughed, despite herself. ‘Exactly,’ she said, justifying her words.
After a while he put in, ‘But I’m not after Keshy baby. Really. Trust me.’
‘Really?’ she replied.
He didn’t respond. Perhaps he was. Perhaps.
* * * * *
Kesha stared at her new man. He was in her bedroom, half naked, swearing to himself that he would NOT father another love child, but not daring to believe he could possibly achieve such a result. Some things, apparently, were inevitable. The lust of Daniel would have its say, in the end. And whatever the consequences, such was life.
Kesha came over, got up on him against the wall, and rode his manhood. He grunted as she rode him and, coming hard, she smiled. ‘Your good, Dan. You’re good. Give me a kid, ok? You don’t mind. I want one of yours.’
‘Hopefully I just did,’ he said, and lay down on the bed, took out a cigarette, lit it, and puffed away.
She went into the shower, came back after washing herself thoroughly, and indicated her femininity. ‘If you possibly can, I wouldn’t mind a rush. You’ve had yours.’
He looked at her, put out his cigarette, and diving into the womanhood of Kesha, tasting her forbidden fruit, he suddenly forgot his dilemma about possibly being a father again, lost in forbidden spices.
When Kesha dropped around with the baby about a year later, Daniel and Melanie back home, as it had been near the end of a shorter tour anyway, Daniel was flabbergasted. Melanie looked at the child, put her little finger in and the kid started sucking it. Again it was a girl. ‘What is its name?’ asked Melanie.
‘Danielle,’ said Kesha,’ looking at Daniel.
‘She wanted one from me,’ said Daniel defensively. ‘That is all it is. She is not interested in any major fling apart from that. I didn’t think it would be a major problem.’
‘No, that is ok,’ said Melanie.
A little later on Melanie blurted it out. ‘We have only had 3 kids, Daniel. Do you….. Do you want more?’
Daniel and Melanie had had 3 children in the early years of their marriage, Jenny, Paul and Fiona, who did not live in Joniquay, but were elsewhere. They visited their parents from time to time, but mostly had their own lives now.
‘Another child, Mel? Do we need more? But, no. I shouldn’t be stupid. It is very natural and normal to want such a thing. Ok. I don’t mind. Sure. When do you want to start.’
She looked at him, pretty sure he meant it and said. ‘Well, ok. I just wanted to check. Yes, I want more. Lots, actually. We could do that sort of thing for a while. A lot of kids.’
‘Yeh. I think we can afford a permanent royalty to each of them for their upkeep, wherever they may roam. Like with the other kids.’
‘There is nothing wrong with them making their own living, Daniel. It is how we both started after all.’
‘That’s true. I do know what you are saying, Mel. But, if I can afford it, which at the moment I can for probably a billion children easily, I would like to give them a royalty. An income.’
‘As you wish,’ responded Melanie. ‘I don’t mind.’
‘Then it is settled. As many as you want, hon. I will even look into buying some property here in Joniquay if I can possibly find some. But you know how expensive it is.’
‘As I have said before,’ responded Melanie.
‘Yes, as you have said before,’ finished Daniel.
* * * * *
After the seventh child, the house was full. All in a rush, twin girls, followed by five boys in a row – a full house.
Natalie and Nellie were the two oldest, followed by David, Michael, Sebastian, Radric and Lucas. They were 5 argumentative boys, who never stopped infighting and trying to dominate each other. You would see strange allegiances form, but David usually ruled in the end.
It was a happy household, and Melanie beamed being a mother again. It seemed, for some personal reason she’d had, that this was necessary at this time. To be a mother again. To have family.
They did all the usual things that families did. They ate at McDonalds together, went to the beach and the snow together, watched television together, and ate their dinners apart, one sitting in front of the box, someone in their room with a wargame, someone up a tree house and so on. It was chaos, but Melanie loved the chaos, and so did Daniel for that matter.
The kids soon found out who their parents were, and how they famous they also were. Mum was a Spice Girl and daddy wrote the bestselling book of all time. It was quite a family to be born into.
The twins, Natalie and Nellie, were reddy brown in their hair colour, and would brush each other’s hair, and tell stories of the boys at school. Daniel and Melanie instantly knew the two of them had that special link which children often had who were twins. They could feel each others pain and sense when the other was worried or concerned. Something was going on there, and Daniel knew it.
They were in fact doing so well, and everything going great for the family, that the letter in the mail from the department of earth affairs seemed to catch Daniel by surprise.
He opened it was Melanie, and the both of them had a fairly good idea what it may be about. And they were right. They had been selected – again, in a sense. For their second duration on earth. They and their immediate family of 7 children, were to have a life again on earth, for it had always been part of the plan that, occasionally, second and even third tours of duty of life on earth would go ahead. They looked at the names that would be given them, which was some of the scarce information available. Melanie would be ‘Jane Chisholm’ and Daniel would be ‘Thomas Daly’. All other details were fuzzy. But they had plenty of time – a huge amount, in fact. Another million years before they would be called to a special meeting about the manifestation. It would be interesting, being on earth again, with its heavy physicality, but Daniel didn’t mind. Such was life.
‘You want to WHAT?’ His tone was quite incredulous.
‘Married. Get married again. To affirm our eternal love for each other.’
‘Fuck. And we need to? We have 10 children together, Melanie Jane Chisholm. Isn’t that enough?’
‘Don’t you love me?’ she said defensively.
‘Oh, fuck. Yes. Yes I bloody do. Look, alright. Whatever. If it will make you happy I am all for it. I didn’t think it was necessary, but reaffirming our vows is something a lot of people do, so whatever.’
‘So can we have a monster of a wedding this time? The first one was kind of basic in hindsight.’
‘I was so excited, ok. I wanted it official.’
‘So this time is the big one, Danny.’
‘Ok Mel. You’ve sold me.’
Melanie proceeded to spend the next 4 months steadily planning the Spice Wedding of the century. She asked Geri if she would sing the main songs at the reception, which didn’t seem to be a problem, and the other Spice Girls said they would do some numbers if she liked.
It was all hectic for a while, and young David said it would be strange going to his own parent’s wedding.
‘It’s not that uncommon, David. A lot of the time people aren’t married when they have their first children, and get married much later.’
‘Isn’t that fornication,’ put in the moral young youth.
‘Well, yes it is son. Yes it is. Glad to see you are on to these things,’ said Daniel, looking down at his very legalistic older son. ‘Is that a problem for you?’
The fifteen year old didn’t respond straight away but then said ‘Well, I have read the Torah. You probably should be married first.’
‘I guess so,’ said Daniel, looking down into the eyes of another David.
The other children were far easier in accepting their parent’s decision and the girls were really looking forward to it, as they were both to be bridesmaids.
Indeed, it would be the wedding of the century.
* * * * *
‘Do you, Daniel, take Melanie Jane Chisholm, to be your lawfully wedded wife. To love her alone, forsaking all others?’
Daniel stood there, and looked at the pastor. ‘Forsaking all others?’ he thought to himself.
‘Well,’ said Melanie, very softly to him.
‘Uh, I do,’ Daniel blurted out.
‘Do you, Melanie, take Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly, to be your lawfully wedded husband. To love him alone, forsaking all others?’
‘I do,’ she responded.
‘By the powers vested in me, as a minister of the Most High God, I declare you before the throne of heaven to be man and wife. You may kiss the bride.’
And he kissed her, and there was cheering, and it was beautiful.
* * * * *
The honeymoon was perfect. Everyone had been at the reception, even Kesha with Danielle had shown up, and the reception had gone late into the night. Then they had disappeared, off to a private plane, away to an island in the ocean, full of tropical wildlife and vegetation, a single resort of about 50 rooms on the island, and nothing more. A very private, and very expensive getaway for a month.
They were passionate in their lovemaking for that month, and did it just about every night. In fact, they had a hunger for each other again and, when she did a test near the end of their stay, she was again positive – they would be having another.
Looking back over his life, at that point, Daniel was bemused at how things had worked out so far. He and Melanie had been through so much together – so many struggles and trials – but it had all worked out in the end. They were together, a happy family, and really, in truth, he couldn’t ask for anything more, Nothing more at all.
‘I am so fucking jetlagged.’
‘Watch your language,’ nudged Melanie, as Daniel almost fell off the airport waiting lounge seat.
‘Were the hell are we anyway?’ queried Daniel, with bloodshot eyes.
‘You don’t know?’ queried Melanie.
‘No fucking idea.’ She nudged him again.
‘We are in Sandranvania. The capital city, Sandravon.’
‘Sandravon? Just a second. The name sounds familiar.’ He looked around, at the airport, and dim memories came back. ‘We’ve been here before, haven’t we? On tour?’
‘Yes, yes I think so,’ she nodded.
‘Right,’ he said. ‘Small world after all.’
He took out his rubiks cube and looked at it. 4 sides completed, and the 5th, which would include the 6th, just about ready to fall. He twisted. For half an hour he twisted, this way and that and, finally, in extreme jubilation and triumph, he held it up to the light and said ‘Ta dar. I TOLD you I would get it.’
‘You took your time though, didn’t you?’ she smiled at him.
‘Such is life,’ he responded.
He then, just for the heck of it, puzzled up his cube, and started playing with it.
Next to him Melanie got an idea. She looked up at the clock, pulled out her pad and wrote down her mobile number and, standing, she walked away a little and turned to him.
‘Daniel!’ she exclaimed.
Daniel looked up. ‘Oh, fuck. Here we go again.’
‘Tricked you!’ she shouted, and jumped on top of him, kissing him on the lips.
That was life married to Melanie C, though, in the end, thought Daniel. You never knew what you were going to get.
“Melanie and Daniel 3”
‘The Times they are a changing, sonny Jim.’
‘Sure old fella,’ responded Daniel, patting the cowboy on the back and helping him up on his horse. ‘Now you be careful. Really, we shouldn’t be letting you ride home back to the ranch.’
‘Don’t worry about me, Danel. This old codger has seen a thing or two in his time. It’ll take more than a nasty rattlesnake or a packfull of injuns to throw me off.’
Daniel smiled. ‘Off you go then,’ he said, patting the horse on the back.
Rags Maloney, the perpetually aged looking cowboy, carefully meandered out of the homestead, after a night of drinking, and steadily embarked on the trail back to his nearby ranch. Rags, really, was as ageless as any other resident of heaven, but preferred the older look, and had prayed for a grey façade to suit his temperament. But that was not that uncommon – the ones who chose age and wisdom. Suited some personalities, apparently, or so he had been led to believe.
He watched after him as he rode down the way some, till he turned at a section and was lost from sight. Daniel, knowing he would likely feel a bit hungover in the morning, despite only drinking 3 beers, looked up at the stars. What a night. Partying with Rags, dancing with Melanie, life on the range. Could he ever want it any other way now?
17 years had passed since they had returned to heaven after a sojourn on earth, in human form once again. And, while it had been memorable in many ways, and marrying Melanie without knowledge of their prior life once again had been truly worth living for, Daniel was now over it. He didn’t want it any more. He didn’t need it any more. The earth life. That was over with for him. He wouldn’t put in any more requests for latter visitations.
He turned, made his way back inside, and decided, against his better wisdom, he might have that fourth.
* * * * *
The album ‘Beautiful Intentions’ was playing in the background, and Daniel had decided against the fourth beer, instead sipping on some freshly squeezed orange juice Melanie had just made for him.
‘You sure about playing the CD?’ he asked her.
‘What? Occasionally. Wasn’t that our agreement. Every once in a while a little bit of electricity,’ responded Melanie.
‘Yeh. Yeh, it was. Sure. Well, how about some TV. It has been a few centuries now. I wouldn’t mind catching up on some news.’
‘Sure,’ she replied.
Daniel sat there, feeling better with the bottle of orange juice she had now opened, enjoying the cool of the night in this western world, watching the box for the first time in ages, seeing things, in truth, really hadn’t changed that much. After a while he clicked on the PC, something he hadn’t touched for just as long, clicked on his bank account, surmised things were about what they should be, checked the current bestseller chart and found ‘Morning Stars’ still at number one, from were it never seemed to budge anymore, and reckoned he likely had a heck of a lot of new fans as usual, and should think about responding somewhat to his gargantuan backlog of emails from interested persons. But perhaps tomorrow. Something to do for a while.
Melanie came over and sat down next to him, poured out a glass of orange juice, and they sat there, in their ‘Rainbow Ranch’ as they liked to occasionally call it, in a heavenly mid west American state, with coyotes out there, jack rabbits doing their nocturnal duties, and even some authentic native injuns, who still got a kick out of the old ways. It was bliss.
Daniel awoke. It was the early morning, and the sun of heaven was rising in the east, the cockerels greeting the day, and Melanie in the kitchen, frying eggs and bacon by the smell of it, whistling a little tune to herself. She must have stoked the fire up, else the electricity was continuing for a while longer.
He sat up on the bed, and did feel a slight hangover, but it wasn’t too bad. The orange juice had had a counter-effect, and he was ok. He sat there for a while, his thoughts settling on what to do today. The fencing had been finished up with Rags yesterday, and the cattle would all be settled into their new grazing grounds. The chook shed had been fixed the week before, and was fine. The sheep had been moved 2 days ago to their new feeding ground, which should suffice for a while and, as much as he could think of things he could possibly do, at the moment he really had a few days to a week or so to do, really, not much. Of course, the farming life, with the eternally good demand they got for beef and lamb in heaven, and the fact that Daniel and Melanie were now experts in the organic meats scene, having researched it a long while ago with their current dream in mind, meant he didn’t really need to rely on his income from his books or her income from her CDs and live shows and other associated products. But, naturally, they would return to the real world, as they often put it, eventually, after their long held cowboy and cowgirl fantasies had been fully enough realized. But, as he had already made his mind up on the issue, they would return here, to Rainbow Ranch as they sometimes called it, again and again in the future, to escape the beast of modern society, and live in yesteryear, in simpler ways, in simpler times, entertaining Rags and his posse, and being just plain old good honest folk.
He looked out to the east, smiled as the sun began its trek to the west, and looked over at Melanie. She was nearly finished with her frying, and he was hungry too. He got up, stretched, and went over to kiss his wife good morning, and enjoy a hearty breakfast.
* * * * *
‘I’m not such an innocent girl. You should know that.’
Daniel said nothing. Victoria was quite skimpily dressed and, with Melanie at the general store in town, Victoria seemed to have taken advantage of the situation.
‘I’m a married man,’ said Daniel carefully.
‘Well, at the moment, I am Miss Adams. David hasn’t been around for a while. Off with some of his mistresses.’
‘But you’re still married to him, aren’t you, though? I mean, you guys never divorce.’
She kept silent, and then decided to confess. ‘Ok, if you must know, for legal purposes with the courts, we are not technically married. We have a certificate of ‘Loving Friendship’ registered, which means we can live together, cohabit and have a full love life, if you know what I mean, and even children, which would necessitate a marriage. But you know the liberties of a ‘LF’ certificate, don’t you.’
Daniel nodded. ‘You can sleep around, if you want.’
‘So you would not be sleeping with a married woman, which is illegal, as you know.’
He said nothing as he looked at her. Melanie would be extremely jealous and, while he expected she wouldn’t know and trusted him, there is a good chance she also knew exactly what Victoria was after as well, with her showing up that lunch-time.
He looked at her in her extremely short denim shorts, her red bra-bikini, and nothing else, and down below his mast stood at attention.
She softly came over, put her hand on his crotch and kissed him on the mouth. That was too much. He took her into the bedroom, quickly pulled down her shorts, and thrust his tongue onto her moist womanhood. Shortly she was moaning, and then, unable to hold back, he pulled off his pants, and thrust into her, soon both of them climaxing at the same time.
‘God,’ she said. ‘I needed that from you, you know. You have been on my mind for so long.’ He was still panting next to her, having had one of his biggest orgasms in years, and nodded. ‘You were amazing,’ he said.
‘Oh, I think you did all the work. Let’s do this tomorrow, and then I will get. So Melanie has no cause for jealousy.’
He didn’t object. After all, the exhilaration had been intense.
When Melanie got home from the store, the two of them seemed normal enough, engaged in a friendly game of chess, chatting politely, drinking wine. She suspected nothing, initially but, going into the bedroom, she sensed something. Something not quite right. She came back out, looked at the two of them, and swore ‘bastard’ under her breath. But she didn’t bring up the issue any more than that. He wouldn’t be too stupid in the end – she knew him well enough by now.
Crack Jiminty was a regular sort of outlaw. If outlaw is what you could call him. Oh, in heaven, if you were lawless, the punishments could indeed be quite severe, in terms of jail sentences. Actual exile from heaven could occur, but you practically had to kill someone before you would qualify. Those who suffered such murders had their spirits taken to a care facility in one of the ‘Higher Heaven’s’ as they were known as, before eventually being returned to heaven after the shock of death had again been dealt with. But, you wouldn’t have to worry about your murderer again as, technically, the penalty was time, first, in purgatory, and then permanent exile to a differing spiritual plane, also tentatively titled a heaven of sorts, but reserved for those who had transgressed, but later shown repentance in purgatory and worthiness of heaven. ‘Bad boy’s’ heaven, in other words, were the laws, actually, were a degree more lenient.
Crack Jiminty knew, in his heart, that he was probably the kind of child of God who would end up in such a heaven. It was in him – some fowl deed or another, and he sensed it in his dreams, in his spirit, in the destiny God had planned for him. And that, in truth, his dark deeds were unavoidable.
Crack dealt drugs, ironically, which was illegal in most nations of heaven, but not opposed too greatly. If people wanted to do drugs, Gabriel was of a mind that he wouldn’t care so much. Their life was in their own hands, ultimately, and people had to learn to be responsible for themselves eventually anyway.
Yet, after a long life of dealing drugs, in and out of trouble with the courts, the judges time and time again reminding him that those in heaven had a standard to set, Crack finally got pissed off enough with the drug scene, worked a regular shmo job for a few centuries, and drifted away to an American West section of heaven, ended up in a deserty state with some plush land around some major rivers, bought a homestead, and retired from it all to live simply as a cattle farmer with a recent wife he had acquired, and to get the hell over his bad boy ways.
But some things never leave you, in the end – sometimes you just can’t escape your destiny.
* * * * *
‘Free me, let me loose to love you, oh how I long to seduce you.’
‘Emma. You are a bad, bad girl. A bad, BAD girl. You know I am faithful to Melanie. Hopelessly devoted.’
‘That’s not what I hear,’ said Emma, a big smile on her face.
‘What do you mean?’ he asked suspiciously.
‘Let’s just say a certain Queen of England’s namesake had a little word with me and confessed some quite, quite, sordid details.
‘Lies,’ I tell you,’ said Daniel proudly. Melanie was again, conveniently, at the general store, and Emma whipped off her bra top and gazed at him. ‘I’m single at the moment, Danny, and you always put on a good performance. My sisters can testify to that truth.’
‘Fuck,’ he said.
‘That really does sound like a good idea,’ she responded, and came forward, worked her magic, and later that night Daniel, next to Melanie, unable to get it up, for Melanie had desires that night, was just hopeful that Melanie hadn’t worked it out. Next to him Melanie, who had remained cordial, was not stupid, and pictures of Daggers being thrust through Daniel’s faithless heart filled her dreams all night.
‘Why Daniel, Daniel?’
‘He has a wicked sense of humour. I need a break from your seriousness, Em.’
Emma Watson said nothing. That was life, though, with Daniel Radcliffe. He made up his mind, made his own decisions, and if you didn’t like it he always said ‘Your free to leave me.’ But she wouldn’t – not now. They had been through too much together. Too much in terms of friendship, more than anything else. It had always been like that, though. The Harry Potter movies to start with – aeons of them – and by then Daniel, Rupert and even Tom Felton, were her best friends. And that just seemed to be the way it was – friends forever, and a day.
They’d been passionate together enough times, and even been married briefly a few times, but it wasn’t that, really. They weren’t man and wife, and didn’t really pretend to be anymore. They were simply best friends – close friends – and the power of magic weaved by Joanne seemed to keep them together forever, wether they wanted that reality or not.
Sometimes she thought to herself, Emma Watson. Just who on earth is Emma Watson? Is she simply Hermione Granger’s alter ego? Is she a forgotten name of an actress whose real life identity, to put it bluntly, was a witch of supreme power and fame? Oh, the tabloids used her real name, the paparazzi never seemed to quite forget who she was, but it always seemed a shadow – a half life. Caught up in the Hogwarts crew, forever condemned to the pounds she had earned and the claim on her life they had made for her talent at the noble art of acting.
Sometimes, true – she regretted it. She wanted her own life, her own space. But it was then, in the wee hours having a drinking session with Daniel or Rupert or Tom or one of the others, that they reminded themselves that, in reality, they were on to a good thing, and the endless money which they had available to them ensured their eternal wealth. Could she complain that much in the end, anyway? Could she?
Besides, anyway, she still, even after all this time, got a bit of a kick out of it. The fame – the fortune – the celebrity. Being known everywhere in heaven, having doors opened for her – literally – whenever she wanted. Well, it wasn’t that bad in the end, anyway.
Daniel’s friend, Daniel Daly, was the author of the ‘Morning Stars’ saga, which was still the number one selling series. The Harry Potter connection, though, was with Daniel’s ‘Lucy Potter’ series, which was connected to Daniel’s saga, Lucy being an invention of Daniel, supposedly a cousin of ‘Harry’s’. The Lucy books, too, were incredibly popular, and the Harry Potter franchise was deemed, by many, as probably lasting forever with its own success and the blessing from the Lucy Potter books.
As they drove along, headed out from London, on the long trek westward, as Daniel had decided to drive all the way, which would take at least a year and a half, Emma looked out the window, watched the familiar scenery pass by, and scratching for something to do, pulled out an Atari Lynx, started playing the game ‘Race to the Death’, and disappeared into Emma World, and let Dan do the driving.
Victoria had left last week. Emma said her goodbyes that morning. Now Melanie was looking at him with daggers in her eyes, and Daniel thought it was time to confess.
‘Yes Daniel,’ she said, with the voice of a nun in her strictness.
‘I have some sins to confess.’
‘Let me guess. Extra marital affairs? Am I right? She said, looking directly at him.
He said nothing, but stood, went into the next room, the living room, and picked up a photograph album, and sat there, looking at photos. About 2 hours later Melanie came in, sat down next to him, and looked at what he was looking at. It was a photo of the two of them together on their first honeymoon. They’d had endless copies of it made, and there was a master copy kept at a certain photography specialist were they obtained copies from occasionally. Daniel had been looking at it for about half an hour, and had cried briefly.
Melanie put her head against his shoulder, looked at the photo, and let it go. Daniel couldn’t confess, but had told her in so many words left unsaid. There was no need to drag the issue up. There was no need to say anything. She looked at the photo, and that it was her, and that it was his way of telling her, sincerely, that she was still the one and that, in the end, even in a rocky relationship, some things never changed deep, deep down in the heart of Daniel.
* * * * *
Daniel sat on the horses back, slowly plodding along, the dozen cattle in front of him being herded by the barking kelpie towards the next open gate. These cattle were to be slaughtered, as they had been sold to the local abattoir after the manager had come out and selected a dozen of them which looked good.
This work was his life, at the moment. A farmer – a cattleman – a cowboy. ‘Rainbow Ranch’ resided in an American state which, technically, didn’t even have a name. It was registered as a state, given a state ranking number, which was the main was of classifying the state, but nobody called it anything in particular. But that was what it was like in ‘Free America’ as it sometimes was called, a conglomeration of about 150 various states, some which had names, some which didn’t even bother. There was a lot of parochial patriotism in names, and the founders of Free America had an attitude that they wanted to get away from things which had been popular in earth ideology, towards a simpler life, a more basic life, not caught up in pursuits of glory, but living the simple life. True, most cities and townships bore names, but that was for postal reasons and the convenience of identifying a place in conversation – but the Spirit of Free America was against patriotism, sort of. It valued American culture and way of life, but denied the bane of patriotism as it was called, and wanted a humbler outlook on life. They were also quite biblical, and teachings from the biblical book of Daniel were popular, the ones which taught God abased proud rulers.
Daniel chose Free America for a number of these reasons – the lack of patriotism and, further, the simple life. But, more than that – the general passivity and calmness the place had a reputation for. They were not necessarily spiritual people, in a religious sense – they were ordinary folk for the most part, with ordinary heavenly values – but they disdained violence, competition and the way of pride. And for Daniel and Melanie, who had gradually gotten over such things which all too often arise in those who achieve great successes in life, the simple life was a refreshing alternative.
Today he was engaged in the basic everyday work of life he had sought, herding cattle to a paddock, and as he plodded along on ‘Freejack’ his horse, he was happy enough, feeling at peace with everything, and looking forward to the traditional meal Melanie prepared for him after a hard day’s work.
Daniel counted the cattle head. 11. He counted again. 11. That was – not right. There should be 12. He went over, checked the gate, and found it secure, and stood there – puzzled. Were on earth was the 12th head of cattle.
The abattoir worker arrived and Daniel, coming over, apologized profusely. ‘Sorry, Sam. I DID have 12 cattle here, but one seems to have gone missing. He must have jumped a fence or run over one, as unlikely as that may sound. I can deliver him myself later on, if that is ok.’
‘Sure, Dan. Well, we will load up these 11 and here is the cheque,’ said Sam Jones, handing over the agreed on sum. That was how Daniel worked out here – cash or cheque only – and on exchange of goods. Nothing more formal than that.
Later that day, having first surveyed the paddock fencelines carefully, not having found any way the cow could have gotten out, he doubted very much that it could have jumped the fence – these ones were designed against it, and were far to high for starters. As bizarre as it sounded, he could only suspect someone had borrowed the cow – for whatever reason’s they had. Heck, if someone needed a cow, he would have been happy enough to give it to them – but taking it without permission? That was almost akin to stealing – almost. He’d do a proper check of the property in the morning to see if it showed up and, if not, he would have a word with the sheriff. See if anything else similar had been happening in the district. Perhaps they had an old fashioned cattle rustler, as bizarre as that may sound.
He finished up for the day, put Freejack into his stall, and spent the night explaining to Melanie C about the missing cow and the possibilities of a romantic cattle rustler in the district. It did give good nightly meal conversation, if nothing else.
* * * * *
Crack Jiminty looked at the cow. A big ‘X’ on the hide, Mr Daly’s symbol for his cattle, standing for God only knows. He had done it for kicks – nothing more really. He was bored, needed to get a bit of a rush, and thought, fuck it – I’ll steal a cow. And so he did.
But, looking at the cow, thinking that it was such a rush and that he enjoyed it so much, he thought on his mates – his posse, as he liked to call them – and a plan entered his head. Rob the district – steal all the cattle – and see if they could get away with it. For how long it ever lasted. I mean, selling drugs had been a lifestyle, but this was fun. He enjoyed it. Of course, technically, again, it was against the law. He couldn’t imagine, though, it was the kind of thing which would ever get him kicked out of heaven, though if he got busted they would throw the book at him and he would do some real hard time. But prison life wasn’t the worst of lives, and the rush, so far, he deemed worth it.
Getting back to the homestead, he went into his den, pulled out a large red handkerchief, and folded it over like a triangle, wrapped it around his face, and looked at himself in the mirror, putting on his white cowboy hat. Rounding off the look, he opened the closet bottom drawer, pulled out his gun and holster, which was mainly just for the look, put it around his waist, and drew the gun, pointing it at the mirror, with his red kerchief over his face, looking every bit the outlaw. ‘Stick em up,’ he said to his reflection. He played around for a while, before putting his gear away and, realizing he had once again embarked on a life of crime, laughed at the irony of being unable to escape his destiny, wether he actually wanted to or not. Some things were just meant to be, Crack Jiminty thought to himself. Just meant to be.
Daniel Radcliffe turned the final corner, and brought the car to a stop near the side of the road. 14 months he had been driving and now, finally, here they were. Free America. They couldn’t drive any more, of course – Free America was old world in most ways. Oh, they allowed electricity and airline travel if absolutely necessary, but cars were strictly a no no, and the only way to get around was on horse and buggy, apart from the traditional steam locomotive system, which ran everywhere through Free America. That was there idea of when to halt progress and escape to a simpler time, with simpler ways.
He had his wallet in his back pocket, and looked at the suitcase with his clothes in the back, Emma standing next to him. ‘We may as well just leave them,’ he said, not directly looking at her, but staring at the luggage. She had the Atari in her hand, shrugged, threw it in the back, and Daniel closed the door. ‘Shall we lock it?’ she asked him. Daniel looked at the border patrol, and the township just down the road a little. ‘I really don’t think it matters, Em. It is mostly done its thing in getting us here, and there isn’t anything we need. Nothing personal in there. We would probably look out of place in those clothes anyway.’
She peered towards the township. ‘Now, you do know how to get to his place, don’t you?’
He said nothing, but pulled out his wallet and showed her the card with his address. ‘Rainbow Ranch’, he said. The place doesn’t have a name, but it has a number. Apparently you can get directions.’
‘Lead on, brave wizard,’ she said with a smile, and he nodded, put his wallet back into his back pocket, and started towards the border guards.
They arrived at two older looking men, with long beards, cowboy hats, denim jeans, looking every inch the respectable cowboys Free America was well known for.
‘Um. We’d like to visit Free America,’ Daniel said. ‘We want to visit some friends of ours.’
The cowboy with the yellow hat spoke up. ‘So yer a visitor, are you son?’
‘I guess. Me and Emma,’ he said, indicating Ms Watson.
Cowboy looked at the other one, who shrugged and seemed to indicate they looked harmless enough, and they stood out of the way and let the two of them pass.
‘So much for a visa,’ said Em.
‘Simpler times,’ responded Daniel.
They continued down along the road a few hundred yards, and shortly came to a place with ‘Free America Inquiries’ written on the front in paint.
‘This should do,’ said Daniel, and they went in.
‘Howdy,’ said the lady behind the front counter. ‘What can I do for you folks.’
Daniel came forward. ‘Um. We want to find a friend of ours. He lives in Free America now. We have his address, but don’t know were it is. And, I guess, we will probably need to convert our cash to whatever currency you work with.’
‘That I can do for you,’ the lady replied. ‘Do you have a credit card? A debit card? Something like that? We can arrange a bank transfer.’
Daniel opened his wallet and pulled out a ‘Bank London’ credit card.
‘Will this do?’ he asked her.
‘Surely will,’ she responded. ‘Now how much do you want?’
He thought about it. ‘Well, how much does the average meal cost?’
‘We are on early earth America sorts of rates. There aint really any inflation. It is mostly agreed on custom in Free America to charge standard rates. So a standard meal will cost you about $1.
‘Ok,’ he responded. ‘Well, how much cash do you have available for us to access?’
‘Oh, sweetie. The bank is next door. You could probably have a million bucks, if that is what you needed.’
Daniel thought on that and nodded. ‘Then we’ll have a million.’
She smiled. ‘Then a million it is. I think we can cover that here. Don’t go spending it all at once, ya hear.’
For the next 10 minutes she explained to him were the train station was, the directions to the state Mr Daly lived in, the necessity of getting a horse or a horse and buggy when he arrived were he needed to go to get around, and some of the various customs and traditions of free America. It was all quite illuminating.
When they finally found the train station, at least 2 miles further, Daniel was sure, than told, he splurged out on a big meal for the two of them and, later that afternoon, when their train finally arrived, Emma almost cracked a joke about the Hogwarts Express. But in the end she refrained. That was all too familiar territory, and almost what they were getting away from out here.
As they watched the scenery pass by, Daniel took out his wallet, and looked at the old photo of Daniel Daly. They had been friends, quite close, for a while. The Harry Potter and Lucy Potter movies had linked them, then. But his sarcasm and wit always attracted Mr Radcliffe, and the fact that he warmed to himself instantly. They seemed to get along, and Daniel thought to himself, as strange as it may sound, deep down it was the Jewish connection with his own bloodline and Daniel’s Noahide faith. They had familiarity because of it. That, and the fact they were both born in England, and had similar values from a similar era. At this point of eternity, with countless sextillions of souls in heaven, finding an old, familiar face, who knew the stuff of childhood you knew, was rare outside of an established friendship. And Daniel Daly was one of those ones – even just a bit older than Daniel himself. From the old days – from the beginning – when the world was still new.
He looked at the photo of Daniel with Melanie, laughed at the jokes he remembered from the day they spent together, and gazed out the window, watching the scenery, wondering what Free America would now have in store for him, having finally arrived at the place.
Daniel opened up the document on his PC titled ‘Computer and Console Games Inventory’. He had an idea for designing a new game, a cowboy game, and wanted to type the title into his file so he wouldn’t forget.
He looked through all the games he owned in ‘Eternal Durable’ copies back at home in his gaming warehouse. The stuff made out of ‘Eternya’ was the most expensive stuff in heaven because it lasted forever – literally. The stuff was produced by God himself, and available in core material form from a company which operated in a large valley in the centre of heaven, which was the base of operations for the supply. It floated out on ‘Rafts’ which ran out of a large tunnel near the bottom of the valley, in a chain of 300 different rafts, every time the load collected, taken to the supply centre, and an endless supply of lorry trucks delivered it were it was supposed to go. Eventually there would be a second supply centre, which would be administered by a specified angelic robot worker which God would create. In fact, rumour had it that is what he had done already with the first centre, and that the Big Guy no longer produced the stuff itself, but that it was completely automated. That was in fact quite true. Not everything was made out of Eternya – there were a hell of a lot of disposable products which simply didn’t need to be kept forever. But Eternya was such flexible stuff that it could be made into any type of desired texture. Every collectable under the sun was made of Eternya these days, as well as books and magazines, furniture, buildings, electrical equipment and items, furniture and so on. It cost a literal tonne, and you had to save for absolute ages to afford even a basic product but, of course, it had one distinct advantage over everything else – it would never corrupt and it would last forever. God, so it was told he had once said to Gabriel – produced only enough of it for people to properly value its worth. Daniel, now being quite old, and quite rich, had purchased numerous items made out of ‘Eternya’ and, amongst these, were about 300 different Console systems for playing various cartridge, CD and USB drive based computer and video games. Special equipment – also made out of Eternya – was used for processing the stuff, as it was too hard for it to be done any other way. But, unless it was ever modified at a later date by such equipment, it would indeed last forever. Thus, his vast collection now, would last all eternity, which had indeed been the promise of heaven.
Daniel’s favourite systems, still, were the Sega Mega Drive, the Commodore 64 Computer with its Cartridges that he liked, and the Super Nintendo as well as the hand held Nintendo DS. Of course, the graphics on these machines were incredibly basic compared to the latter more complex consoles, even compared to the X-Boxes from Microsoft, which were still early consoles, but Daniel liked the more basic stuff in many ways anyway. It was authentic, original sort of stuff, and the graphics and memory capabilities were good enough as far as he was concerned. Heck, he even had a classic ‘Space Invaders’ arcade machine made out of Eternya which took Australian 20 Cent pieces to run back in his den at home.
He typed in the name ‘Cowboys, Cowboys and More Ruddy Cowboys and the Age Long Quest for the Cactus of Power in the Wild, Wild West’. It was a complex game idea, revolving around Cowboys, funnily enough, and a very important Cactus which, rumour had it in the game, was the fundamental axis of creation on which this particular cowboy world ran. It was a standard ‘Eternity Quest’ type of game which Daniel had originally designed, meaning it would take the player several millennia to decode the various quests and complete the game. A grandiose ‘Ultima’ type of saga, with endless quests to complete, literally millions of characters to interact with, and a very detailed world graphically in which to escape and spend aeons amusing oneself. Funnily enough, he planned on doing the initial version on the Commodore 64, the actual memory of the game, though, being stored on the Cartridge itself, the cartridge system that had been devised storing all the data and being virtually limitless in what it could offer in terms of length. But the graphics, music and the gameplay in general would all be built around standard C64 capabilities, which is how Daniel liked to start with his new ‘Eternity Quest’ outings. He had a fanbase, naturally, for all these computer games he produced, and while this particular game would likely take close to 3 or 4 million years to design and create, it would be something to work on when he got home. Funnily enough, he had been told that, in time, as his back log of about 4000 games kept on growing in popularity, he would likely end up more famous for the games themselves and in fact end up richer on the games than on his publishing and movie deals, which surprised him greatly.
‘Cowboys, cowboys, cowboys,’ he thought to himself. ‘It should be a heap of fun in the end.’ And, as he typed away, entering in some of his plot and design details for the game, he was in his own little world, a happy little Daniel, escaping into a fantasy universe of his own creation.
Daniel was again out on ‘Freejack’, patrolling his property, and was meandering up to the large hill paddock, where 300 cattle were grazing. He came to the gate, got off Freejack and opened it, brought his horse through, and closed the gate after him. He would count them, now, just in case. The recent loss of a cow was still on his mind, and he just wanted to make sure that a similar encounter had not happened again.
He spent 20 minutes going from one end to the other, and counted 297 Cattle. Puzzling, he counted them again, and then a third time. Each time it was 297 cattle. He spent a while carefully patrolling the fence line, found no faults, and confirmed his fears to himself – someone was pinching from his herd. And that wasn’t right.
He spent some time going through the cattle, looking at the briefly, checking some of them for any diseases, and taking a blood sample of 3 different ones to check back at the homestead to ensure nothing bad was happening. They were organically raised, and if there were problems he would have to cure them naturally – but there were advanced natural methodologies now, as scientists had gone a long way discovering the traditional natural cures inherent in many plants. An animal’s original native habitat nearly always held the answer – ironically.
As he rode on Freejack back down to the ranch, the blood samples in a small pack in his backpack, he thought on the missing cattle. He would now, likely, contact the local sheriff, Tom Anderson. If there was a cattle rustler in the district, as romantic as it might sound, people had livelihoods to maintain, Daniel as well, technically. Theft was theft, after all – no matter how traditional or daring such a lawless lifestyle once was.
* * * * *
Crack Jiminty, Blake Ferguson, John Hopkins and Roger Simpson looked at the 3 cattle in the yards of Crack’s ranch.
‘Now what?’ asked Roger.
‘I don’t know. Eat them, I guess,’ responded Crack. ‘Blake, you can slaughter them out the back and we will have barbecues for a few months. Free prime quality cattle. It’ll be a hoot.’
The Posse nodded, and Crack looked over the cattle with the ‘X’ burned into their skins. Sure, they would make good feeding, but he couldn’t ever sell them. Not that, in truth, he really needed to anyway. The farm was doing ok. He didn’t NEED to steal the cows – it was just for kicks. But it would provide quality barbecue meat for a while, and after having consumed the first one he knew Daly’s meat was of a high standard. Good feeding indeed.
* * * * *
Daniel sat with Melanie, looking out over the twilight night, sipping on a beer of all things to drink, which was rare for Daniel, Melanie snuggled up next to him, gazing at the emerging stars.
‘We’ve had a telegram. I picked it up at the store,’ said Melanie.
‘From who?’ asked Daniel.
‘Harry Potter himself,’ smiled Daniel.
‘He and Emma – they will be arriving shortly. They are not that far away.’
‘Crikey,’ said Daniel. ‘Harry Potter in Free America. How will he ever survive.’
‘Oh, I’m sure he’ll do fine. Daniel has always had a level enough head. Stable guy – you can tell. It oozes out of him.’
Daniel nodded knowingly. Mr Radcliffe had that much in spades – quiet calmness. It came out in his acting work. Confidence – a quiet achiever – stable. Around for the long haul, and a committed sort of fellow. It was why he admired him so much. Also, a fellow inkling like himself. Inducted into the famous writer’s league for his acclaimed Harry Potter trilogy. A totally professional work which J K herself called ‘Brilliant’.
‘He does booze a bit, though,’ responded Daniel. ‘Usually has a lid on the situation, but can be known for partying if he is in the right mood.’
‘He handles it well enough.’
‘Oh, he knows when to call it a day. Not stupid. But he and Ron have had some legendary wild ones. And some times a fair number of the ladies of the night were involved.’
Melanie nudged him. ‘Don’t say that, Danny. Daniel’s a good guy.’
‘Men are men. I should know – I’m one of them.’
‘Too true,’ she said under her breath, but he did notice her saying it.
‘Well, Daniel should be good company for a while. Do we need separate bedrooms for them? Or are they together?’
‘I don’t know for sure,’ responded Melanie. ‘We’ll find out when they arrive.’
‘I guess so,’ he responded.
They gazed at the stars for a while and then, today honouring the sabbath, which Daniel rarely did, but sometimes honoured it in his own sort of Noahide way of doing things, they retired inside, pulled off the tablecloth over their meal, and started making their way through chicken lasagne, very well made pumpkin bites with creamy bacon sauce, and a fine bottle of chardonnay. It was, truly, a night to remember.
Daniel was on the top of Mt Taylor, a mountain on his property, camping the night with Rags Maloney, his old fella neighbour, up with all the cattle which had been moved into the topmost paddock of the mountain. They were in a gorge on the mountain, hidden from general view, waiting – waiting to see if any cattle rustlers would show up tonight. They had committed to about 3 weeks of this, before Daniel would want to get home as Daniel Radcliffe was due about then, according to a second telegraph that Melanie had received at the store.
It was early morning, and there was dew on the cover of the 3 man tent, and Daniel had gotten the fire going and was cooking eggs and bacon. Rags was still asleep, and he didn’t want to wake him, but would put aside breakfast on a plate for him when he woke.
He was in, generally, quite a good mood. But that was life for Daniel, now. Generally good. Generally contentment. He had worked most of his issues out in life long ago, and was going with the flow, being alive, being himself, which was the prevailing philosophy on such things. He was happy with it all, glad he had a faithful partner in Melanie who, in truth, he really didn’t like cheating on, but was human enough to admit that is just bloody well happened from time to time, despite his best intentions. He had a goog place to live at the moment, happy with the property, the way things were running, despite the current concern of the cattle. All up, yes – life was good. Really, what more could he ask for.
He sat there, watching the bacon and eggs fry away, and did not notice the sudden presence of someone. Someone he had seen a long, long time ago, when it had been his place on the rostered list to meet him. It was the Theophany – God himself, he quickly noticed – who always promised that, some day, he would catch up again with his son Daniel. Some day Daniel would get a second meeting.
‘Fuck,’ he swore under his breath, looking at the ancient ageless looking man. He had grey and black hair, bald on top, but a fierce beard. He was about 5 ft 11, somewhat muscular, and dressed in a black jumper with a skivvy underneath, denim jeans, and boots. He looked every inch the man of power – every inch God Almighty.
‘Daniel,’ said God. ‘How are you son?’
Daniel said nothing, but returned his gaze to the bacon and eggs. Shortly he took another plate, put some of the bacon and eggs on it, and getting a fork, passed it to God. God accepted it, sat down, and started eating.
Eventually Daniel spoke.
‘You again, huh? I guess you did promise to catch up. But that was a VERY long time ago now. I had almost forgotten.’
‘Some things take time, Son. I have a lot of people on my list. You should know that.’
‘Yeh. I guess so. I kind of figured that.’
God nodded, and continued eating his bacon and eggs.
‘So. What is this? Just a catch up? The fulfilment of a promise? Will I see you again after this?’
God said nothing, initially, and then looked at him. ‘Do you want to?’
Daniel looked at him, right at him, and then returned to his own bacon and eggs which he had just started cooking.
‘You’re God, though. Aren’t you. Shouldn’t I want to meet you? Get to know you?’
‘Why does that necessarily follow?’ the Theophany asked him.
Daniel said nothing, but considered that. ‘Well, I don’t know. It just does, I guess. I mean, that’s the way it is in life, isn’t it?’
God looked at Daniel, said nothing, and stood, putting down his plate. ‘Come on. Walk with me,’ he said.
Daniel put the pan off the flames, and checking on Rags, stood, walked over to God, who started leading the way up the gorge to the top of the mountain.
At the top he stopped and they gazed at the Sun of Heaven.
‘You’ve worked it out, haven’t you?’
‘What?’ Daniel asked his creator.
‘What you need to know. The things you need to get by in life.’
‘Well, yeh. I guess so.’
‘Good,’ said God, and said nothing more.
He turned to him and raised his hand towards the valley in front of them. ‘This is the Eternal Realm of Glory. You have probably heard it called that.’
‘Yep. Sounds familiar,’ said Daniel, looking over it.
God turned towards the valley. ‘There are people out there, son. Lots of them. People you haven’t met yet, but you will. People in your destiny. There are places – things you will still find fascinating when you first see them. And there is spirit – spirit of Glory – which will touch you, and shape you, and give you the consolation which you need from time to time to put all the pieces together.’
‘Your point?’ asked Daniel.
‘My point is this,’ said God, returning his gaze to his son. ‘What more do you expect of me? I mean, what more do you want out of life?’
Daniel nodded. It was something he had thought on, occasionally. In the wee hours. God’s purpose in it all.
‘Nothing, really,’ responded Daniel. ‘I have a thirst, still. For life. For new things, I guess. That is all it really is. But, no. I am satisfied with Melanie. But, oh, I don’t know. There is still someone to meet – another. Another lady, I think, while I hate to say it as simply as that. Its like I know her already, but we aren’t quite there yet. Like there is something which has to happen first.’
God looked at him. ‘You’ll work it out. I’m sure of that.’
Daniel puzzled on that, the way God had spoken to him, showing his infinite knowledge, and let the issue drop then. Whatever it was, perhaps it was true as Torah said. On throughout time lie the mysteries of the soul.
God came over, gave Daniel his hand, who shook it, and they returned to Rags Maloney and then, not noticing, just as suddenly as God had been there, he was gone. And when he would see him again, ironically, only God really knew for sure.
‘Well, Daniel. Good to see you again,’ said Daniel Daly, offering his hand to Mr Daniel Radcliffe who had arrived in a horse and buggy with Emma Watson, both dressed somewhat in Free America type clothing.
‘Daniel,’ said Daniel Radcliffe, shaking Daniel’s hands.
‘I guess first things first. How long do you plan on staying? I mean, sure, if you want to stay a few years – even a decade or so – it won’t be a problem. We don’t mind guests for an extended stay, and we get along.’
‘Oh, I don’t know,’ said Emma. ‘Why don’t we play it by ear.’
‘Sure,’ responded Melanie. ‘Do you have any luggage?’
‘Just what we are wearing,’ said Daniel. ‘No sort of real point, travelling for so long. Moving around. Start again when we get there, we both agreed.’
‘Right,’ said Daniel Daly. ‘Well. We had a debate, and in the end we had both guest rooms made up and ready. That is the case, isn’t it?’
Emma glanced at Daniel Radcliffe, looked at him a little nervously, and nodded. ‘Yes. Yes, we will have a room each. That is right isn’t it Daniel?’
Daniel Radcliffe looked at her and nodded. ‘I guess.’ He turned to Melanie. ‘Is there somewhere we can wash up? The trip yesterday took all day, and I need a shower. I am sure Em does as well.’
Melanie led the way through the large ranch house to there bedrooms, which both had ensuites. ‘I am sure you will both be comfortable. We have put Daniel in the blue room and Emma in the pink. Boys and girls.’
‘Sure. Thanks,’ said Daniel.
‘Great,’ responded Emma.
‘Oh. It may sound kind of dumb, but I dragged out a few Harry Potter books and put them on each of your bookcases, as well as some other books you might to look at. Familiarity, if nothing else,’ said Daniel D.
‘That’s fine,’ responded Daniel R. ‘Well, if you’ll excuse me.’
‘Right-e-o,’ responded Daniel D. ‘Well, dinner is at 7 or there abouts. We don’t have anything really planned for this afternoon, as we felt you each would probably want to rest. There is a stereo in each of your rooms and, while we don’t normally use the electricity, we thought with you guys here we would make an exception. There are some Mozart CDs in each of your rooms, and some of Melanie’s stuff as well. I am sure you can find something to relax with. Well, ok. We’ll leave you to it.’
Daniel and Melanie returned to the main living rooms, leaving Daniel and Emma alone in the hallway looking at there rooms.
‘Blue and Pink. Quaint,’ said Emma.
‘Do you want to swap?’ asked Daniel R with a slight grin on his face.
She looked into his room, which seemed about the same as hers, and shook her head. ‘No, mine will do. I guess traditional roles with Daniel, knowing him and his religious ways.’
‘Oh, he doesn’t bring it up once he gets to know you,’ responded Daniel R. ‘I think it is his way of letting people know his values – were he is coming from in life. He said that to me once. After a while he doesn’t even discuss it, unless you ask questions.’
‘Oh,’ said Emma. She didn’t know Daniel Daly that well, after all, but they had been acquaintances for some time over the years.
‘Well, I am going to shower and rest,’ said Daniel R. ‘I’ll be out for dinner.’
Emma nodded, turned and entered her room, closing and locking the door. She needed a shower, and would possibly look at the books and the CDs. But she, too, was tired, and as strange as it may sound in the long time getting here, she needed a good holiday from all the driving, and from the hectic London life as Hermione Granger, and escaping in Free America may just be the kind of thing she was looking for. And, besides, there were no paparazzi to even poke a stick at, and that always had to be a good thing.
The four of them sat around the dinner table, chatting about this and that, eating through the fried chicken and coleslaw, drinking orange juice, and catching up on old times.
‘Well, Free America is a strange beast,’ started Daniel D. ‘But you probably know that already.’
‘We have a fair idea,’ said Emma.
‘I don’t think, in truth, it is for everyone,’ said Daniel D. ‘It is, in many ways, more reserved, more backwards, as strange as that may sound, than your traditional America. Don’t get me wrong – they are American’s out here – but they were those kinds of Americans who didn’t fit into the mainstream land of liberty and freedom. Which is ironic, as the place is called Free America. But it is in Free America were socialism has a far greater voice, as you might have already guessed, or at least some of the true philosophies of socialism. It is very, very much a welfare sort of state, in as much as you will definitely be provided for if you are out of work or finding it difficult at any particular time. People here are motivated to care and help for each other. Not, as some might perhaps think, out of any divine response, because religion here is quite basic. It is mainly out of a left wing socialist philosophy of caring for members of the state and being socially minded. Being a responsible member of a society, rather than an individual looking to make a name for him or herself. Being part of a community and a family. Perhaps Communism at its ideal best. No, we don’t have communes or anything like that. At least not significant ones. And, yes, there is a lot of capitalist drive and it is, technically, a capitalist economy and state. But there is, as said, a strong focus on cooperation, working as a team, and caring about all members of the community and being there for each other. It is free in as much as it tolerates a lot of lifestyles which the mainstream don’t normally tolerate, but still has a sense of propriety about it. For example, there are certain cities with designated gay districts, prostitution is allowed in certain designated areas, which is really very rare for most of heaven, and doing drugs and getting drunk on your own property is quite legal in most parts. I probably shouldn’t say this, but bestiality is even legal in 3 of the states, which is not well known out there, as we don’t talk about it very much and it is discouraged but tolerated.’
‘Why so much freedom?’ Emma asked him, picking on her chicken.
‘Some people need it, I think,’ responded Daniel. ‘Just the way some of us are, perhaps by nature. We need to be around those kinds of people who are a lot more flexible on certain ways of life, and birds of a feather flock together as they say. For the most part, though, it is like a dominant left wing state of America. There IS a religious element, but it is minor, and I am something of an exception in many ways. I fit here, though, because in my own Karaite Noahide tradition there is a fair bit of leeway in the kind of lifestyle it permits, despite it being a religion of God.’
‘But why care about religion anyway?’ put in Emma. ‘I mean, God doesn’t care. He never seems to too me. I have been here, with all my family, for so long now, and never has it really been discussed or raised.’
‘You seem to fit into a certain social expectation,’ said Daniel. ‘Forgive me, Em, but Hermione Granger can’t afford to be particularly religious. She is a witch after all.’
Emma looked at him, thought on responding, but bit her lip. But she did finally respond. ‘I am sort of a Christian, Daniel. Oh, sort of. Well, I don’t know. Not really any more, I guess. Not in truth. Not any more. What am I saying.’ She looked at Daniel R. ‘We don’t really have one, do we? A religion?’
Daniel R shook his head. ‘The laws of heaven. It’s about all I worry about, when I do. Live your life otherwise. Do what you want.’
Melanie spoke up. ‘I am still a Christian. I have had different religious thoughts, over a long time, and been involved with different things. But I hold with Jesus as my teacher. It seems to be the only thing which lasts with me. I guess I don’t really care about religion apart from that. It never really grabbed me deep, deep down. Other religions, I mean. Daniel’s Noahide faith somewhat, because it is the Jewish Bible and Jesus was Jewish. For a long time I was with a group which I thought gave me what I needed in life. The focus on God. The routine. The disciplines. The virtue. Life doesn’t work like that for me, anymore, though. I don’t know, Em. Perhaps I am like you – perhaps I don’t really need religion. Perhaps it is just the Beatles. All you need is love..’
Daniel D looked at her and nodded. She didn’t speak about her beliefs to him terribly much anymore. She never really did that, apart from the phase she went through with the Peacekeepers of Jehovah.
Daniel R spoke up. ‘I have Jewish blood. That’s about it. God’s there. So what, now. He doesn’t seem to worry about us. Just wants us to be happy. It was only about rules, anyway – the religious stuff. The law of the land always did that for me, in the end. For most people.’
Daniel D picked up a piece of fried chicken. ‘It still causes too much contention. Deeply held beliefs. Beliefs of the heart. It takes an old soul, well reasoned, well thought out, to be able to seriously discuss and impart religious teaching. And then, so it seems, it takes an eternity to sink in.’
The group went silent for a while, perhaps thinking on Daniel’s thoughts, before Emma commented to Melanie on the meal, and a lighter mood ensued.
After Dinner Daniel D spoke to Emma and apologized for going on into religion, as he normally didn’t do that anymore, and knew how sensitive people could be on the issue. She assured him she didn’t mind, but he seemed very worried that he might have offended her.
That night, before she fell asleep, she thought on her own beliefs, and that it was mainly just about being who Emma Watson was, and finding her own meaning in living her life as she thought good and proper. Nobody seemed to stick with rules forever, anyway, and always ended up betraying their faith for a more convenient lifestyle. Like Melanie said – let love rule, and with a little grace everything would be alright in the end anyway.
‘The Devil wears Green Shoes.’
‘Huh?’ asked Melanie, sitting next to Daniel on the couch.
‘Uh, nothing. Sorry sweetie. Just a title idea I had for a book.’
‘Oh,’ she said, and returned to her crossword book which Emma had brought with her upon arriving.
Daniel stood, looked out the windows towards the south, and looked at Mel. ‘Do you think they will be back soon?’
‘Why do you ask?’ she asked him.
‘Oh. Well, I sort have something to do, farm related. I have been putting it on hold for the last few days while Dan and Em have been here, but I need to go out and check.’
‘Its not those cattle again, is it? There is probably a perfectly good explanation to were they have gotten to. You just need to be patient.’
‘And lose them all? What will we sell next market?’
‘If you must,’ she said, returning to her book. ‘I’ll let them know you’ll be a little late.’
‘Right,’ he said, and disappeared to change and head off on Freejack.
* * * * *
Rags Maloney, still atop the gorge in the 3 man tent, down to the last rasher of bacon and final 4 eggs, which were stored in a coolbox, knowing Daniel would be back soon enough as he promised, was cautious when he heard the voices. It was early in the morning, around 4, and he brought out his torch and then, thinking better, charted his way from the stars without turning it on to not give the game away.
He heard them, over the next rise, and crawled up to spy on them. 4 of them, by the looks of it, herding 3 cows into the back of a carriage. Yep, they were rustlers all right.
He stood, turned on his torch, and started yelling ‘We’ve got you surrounded.’ And then, not really knowing what else to do, he watched them but stayed put. What else could he do, really? There were four of them, and presumably they were not armed, and he didn’t have any weapon on him.
It didn’t seem to matter anyway because after a bit of commotion, a torch lit up and he was soon in the presence of 4 nasty looking critters.
‘Crack Jiminty. I should have known,’ said Rags.
‘He’ll squeal,’ said Roger. ‘What do we do?’
‘Tie him up,’ said Crack. And so they did.
* * * * *
Daniel found Rags that afternoon, tied up, left near the tent, gagged, but otherwise fine. When he pulled off the gag Rags said instantly. ‘That varmint Crack Jiminty. Him and his posse.’
Daniel nodded. They had their man.
He untied Rags and Rags rubbed his wrists and looked at him. ‘What next?’
‘Did they take any cattle?’
‘They had 3 of them. I guess they still probably took them.’
‘Right,’ said Daniel. ‘Well. Mmm. Nothing. Not for now. They know we are on to them. It may sound really stupid, but that may just about be the end of the matter. I mean, sure, we can go after them and press charges even, but I don’t like to make trouble for people less I can help it. This will probably be the end of it I reckon. Now that they know they’ve been found out my guess is that they will stop. They’ve probably just been having some fun.’
‘No good varmint,’ said Rags, rubbing his wrist. ‘Still, you gonna tell the Sheriff?’
‘I’ll think about it,’ said Daniel. ‘Right, well, let’s get the tent packed up, and get you back home. Leave Crack Jiminty to me. I will sleep on it and make a decision in the morning.’
‘No good varmint,’ said Rags once more, as they started packing away the tent.
Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson had returned from their picnic down by the river, and it was starting to get a little late, but Melanie assured them that Daniel shouldn’t be too much longer.
There was commotion, suddenly, out the front, and Melanie suggested that Daniel had probably returned.
Daniel Radcliffe went outside but it wasn’t Daniel Daly there to greet him – it was four rather hostile looking cowboys.
‘Tell Daly,’ one of them said, in a hoarse voice. ‘If he squeals, well. Well, he’ll know it. And it won’t be pretty.’
Daniel said nothing, but watched as the four of them spat on the ground, turned their horses, and rode off.
He came back inside, a little puzzled, and explained the episode to the girls. When Daniel Daly got home just a little later, they sat around discussing the matter. Melanie, really, was not impressed.
‘What are you going to do now, Dan?’ she asked her man.
‘Handle it,’ he responded. He looked at Daniel. ‘Well, cowboy? Are you ready for some real wild, wild west?’
Daniel Radcliffe broke out in a grin. ‘Sure, pardner.
‘Good grief,’ said Melanie, putting her hand to her head. ‘It’s gone to his bloody head.’
Emma was not amused either.
* * * * *
With Rags Maloney in tow, the three of them rode proud and strong, up to the Jiminty ranch the following day around lunch, ready for a meno e meno. They would resolve this – sort it out good and proper.
They weren’t armed. Despite the thrill of what they were into, that much seemed just a bit too much, even for Daniel’s cowboy fantasies. He was sure, anyway, that it could be resolved.
They arrived at the ranch, noting the cows skull head above the entrance to the property, and came to the main homestead, sitting on there horses, looking at the place. The men’s horses appeared to be still there, so they were likely inside, and Daniel spied his cattle over in a nearby yard.
Daniel yelled out. ‘Crack. Come out. It’s Daniel Daly. We need to talk.’
Suddenly a gunshot went off, and the three of them ducked there head.
‘For fucks sake, Dan,’ said Daniel R. ‘You said there wouldn’t be any of these problems.
‘I didn’t think there would be,’ he responded.
They waited for about 5 minutes, not speaking again, waiting for some other sign of life, but nothing else happened.
Eventually Daniel had had enough. He dismounted Freejack, came up, knocked on the homestead door, and yelled. ‘Don’t shoot. I’m coming in.’
He opened the door, came inside, and found 3 of them there, one with a shotgun. ‘Scared the begeezus out of you, din’t we,’ one of them said.
Daniel didn’t smile. ‘You guys are nuts. Where’s Crack?’
‘He saw you guys coming,’ one of them said. ‘He’ll be taking your womenfolk now. Seriously, though, don’t count us in on that shit. We have our limits an all. Crack, though, he’s still something of a bad boy. You know him.’
Daniel swore under his breath and looked at Daniel R who had entered the room. ‘We better get back. Crack’s not really that dangerous, but the situation might have just gone to his head a little bit. Gone a bit nuts.’
‘Ok,’ responded Daniel R, and looked at the men. ‘What do we do about them?’
‘I think they have had there fun. They won’t mess around again. I know em too well for that. Right Roger?’
‘Sure Danno. You know me. A bit of fun – not too much though. I know the limits.’
‘We better get going,’ said Daniel R.
As they returned to Rags, leaving the Jiminty gang be, as there was nothing really much more to discuss without Crack, Daniel was a little worried about Melanie and Emma, but was sure Crack wasn’t actually going to do anything too drastic. Hopefully.
When Daniel and Daniel left, Melanie and Emma amused themselves with photos of the group of them which Melanie had brought out. Not much time had passed, though, and suddenly a man with a kerchief over his face burst into the room, armed with a pistol.
‘Don’t make any sudden moves,’ he said to the girls. ‘Come on. Outside.’
Melanie motioned for Emma to do as he said, and they were taken outside, put on to a buggy and tied down.
The masked man, who Melanie instantly had recognized as Crack Jiminty, went inside briefly, and then returned and mounted and drove the buggy up towards the nearby hills were the old mineshafts were.
As they drove along Melanie thought about perhaps trying to escape, but was worried about the pistol. She really didn’t want to do anything stupid. She didn’t want to provoke Crack who seemed to have gone off the deep end just a little bit.
They arrived at one of the abandoned mine shafts and Crack untied them, indicated for them to start walking, and lighting a lamp, they made there way inside the mines.
He seemed to know were he was going and, after a trek, they came to a main room, with a number of items of old mining equipment, and beams going from the floor to the roof. Crack tied the girls too a beam, hid out of sight, and there they waited. ‘They’ll come, soon,’ said Mel to an Emma who had gone silent, but seemed to be sobbing a little. ‘Don’t worry, Em. The boys will rescue us.’
* * * * *
Daniel R found the note, and read it out loud.
‘Right,’ said Daniel D. ‘This could be more trouble than I’d hoped for. Perhaps, now, we take it a bit more seriously.’ He turned to Daniel R. ‘Do you really like to be a cowboy?’
Daniel smiled in response. Daniel D led him into a back room, came to a closet, and opened it. It was stocked with 3 rifles, some pistols and holsters, and some ammunition.
‘I know. Crazy to have this stuff, mainly for romantic reasons, but I figured it being the wild west and all.’
Daniel R Smiled and, as they armed up, looking in the mirror, Rags, who had sneaked in, said ‘Gosh tarn it. Now yers cowboys.’
* * * * *
They arrived at the mines, found the one which the note said they would be in, and entered in.
‘Rags. You go that way, down the other tunnel,’ said Daniel. ‘Now don’t bloody shoot unless you really have to. I am sure Crack still just wants a bit of fun.’
‘I’ll shoot allright,’ mumbled Rags to himself, as he went down the side tunnel
Daniel D turned on the torch and as they carefully came forward Daniel R asked ‘What were these mines for?’
‘Oil, I think’ said Daniel D. ‘And coal. There is a rich bed of both down below. They gave it away a long time ago, but the mines were never closed.’
As they slowly inched forward Daniel slipped, suddenly, and ended up in large sticky pile of black ooze. The torch had spilled out of his hand and Daniel R picked it up, pointed it towards Dan and smiled. ‘You look a mess,’ he said to Daniel D.
‘Oh, very funny genius,’ said Daniel D.
Daniel R grinned a little, stepped forward to help Daniel D out of the goo, and suddenly slipped himself, and was soon covered in oil as well.
‘Poetic justice, I should think,’ Said Daniel D, to a very miffed looking Daniel R.
They continued on, watching for oil puddles, and came into the main cavern.
‘There,’ said Daniel R, pointing to the girls.
‘You go and untie them,’ said Daniel D.
‘Why me?’ asked Daniel R.
‘Cos someone has to keep watch,’ said Daniel D.
Daniel R mumbled something under his breath, but never the less came forward carefully and smiled at Emma who looked instantly far happier than she had been, and began untying them.
Suddenly a shot rang out and Crack yelled. ‘Leave them ladies be. I’m a good shot, fella. I don’t think you want to risk it.’
Daniel R backed away, and looked at Daniel D. Daniel D waved his hand in a circular motion to indicate to keep Crack busy.
‘We just want the ladies,’ said Daniel R. ‘You have had your fun, Mr Jiminty.’
Another shot was blasted, and Daniel R didn’t move.
Daniel D, circling around carefully, soon spotted Crack up in the glass panelled office. He hated to do it, but aimed, prayed for good luck, and pulled the trigger.
A quick ‘fizzing’ noise flashed, and a dart sped through the air, hit Crack in the leg, and he yelled ‘Yipes.’ Shortly, though, the tranquilizer having its effect, he collapsed onto the floor, and that was that.
‘A Tranquilizer?’ Daniel R said, after he had untied the girls.
‘You didn’t think I would really use bullets,’ said Daniel D, a grin on his face. ‘They are in yours as well. Tranquilizer darts. They were already in the gun. I just wanted to impress you. I mean, seriously, nobody was meant to get hurt.’
They dragged Crack out to the front, and spent a while searching for Rags, who eventually emerged from a tunnel, having gotten half way to China in his own words.
* * * * *
Daniel didn’t end up pressing charges, but Crack was slung into jail by the judge anyway, and sentenced to 3 years for the rustling, and 12 years for the kidnapping and dangerous use of weapons. It was, apparently, a light sentence.
‘The other men in the posse got off with just a year each, and swore they were just having fun to all and sundry.
In the end, the mystery was resolved, and life started getting back to normal for Melanie and Daniel after something of an adventure. A real cowboy adventure.
‘So, you think you are a cowboy, do you?’ Emma asked Daniel R, as they sat by the river near the Rainbow Ranch, Daniel and Melanie a distance away, on a picnic the following day after the big adventure.
‘Oh, you know,’ said Daniel R, who did indeed feel every inch the cowboy, but was to humble to say so.
‘Rescued your maiden, got the bad guy. We only needed some treasure, and it would have been perfect.
‘You’re my treasure, Em,’ said Daniel, biting down on an apple. She smiled on that statement.
A little way off Melanie was putting some chicken on to a plate for Daniel, and handed it to him. ‘My hero,’ she said.
‘Hero?’ queried Daniel.
‘It’s not every day you do something so brave,’ she said, smiling at him.
‘Oh, it was nothing,’ he said, with false humility.
‘My hero,’ she said again, a big smile on her face.
* * * * *
A while later, things had settled down, after much bravado from both Daniel’s, and regular life was restored. Daniel and Emma agreed to stay for another few months, for now, but were thinking they might just buy a place in the district, and settle in for a while. Somewere new to live, to experience, to just be, in the words of both of them.
And, in fact, three months later, in the adjoining valley, they purchased a small homestead which had long been available, moved in, and were apparently together in an unofficial sort of way. But nothing more than that.
Daniel R philosophized from time to time that, in eternity, you had endless time to do endless things, and living in Free America and learning all about its ways was a good enough place to spend some of it. And, besides, the Daly’s were good enough company to be around for a while, and Daniel D did seem to have a way of focusing Daniel on certain issues, things which seemed to give his life direction in terms of what it was supposed to be about. And, perhaps for some of those reasons, it was a time to spend in Free America, a time of life to get away from being Harry Potter, and to just be himself.
And a time to get to know a certain Emma Watson just that little bit better.
* * * * *
Daniel sat with Melanie, her arm around him, on the couch, looking out at the night.
‘So. We have new neighbours,’ she said.
‘Yep,’ responded Daniel.
‘And they seem happy enough with the district. They could be around for some time.’
‘Yep,’ he said again.
‘But this isn’t forever, in the end, is it? I mean, we will leave eventually. I mean, eventually. That was always understood, wasn’t it?’
He turned to look at her, thought on saying something, but returned his gaze to the stars.
Eventually he spoke. ‘Whatever else, Melanie Jane Chisholm. Let us enjoy our time we have in the here and now, and thank God that, for now, life is working. It might not always be that way, you know – nobody really ever knows what the future holds – but for now, we have a simple, happy life, and I don’t think either of us would have it, really, any other way.’
She nodded, kissed him on the cheek, and as they returned their gaze to the stars, over in the corner of the room, for the briefest moment, an ancient spirit dropped in, smiled a little, and again disappeared, off to his next adventure.
Rest In Peace
So, in the fullness of time, all good things came to pass, and all good things came to be. Well, almost. The fullness of all good things, in the end, really is eternal – just ask God when he feels like sharing some of his secrets with you. But, for the most part, the Eternal Realm of Glory enjoyed joys and happinesses and peaces and loves and all, as they say, good things.
And then, in the summation, completion and the entirety of its days, the eternal realm of glory, like those gone before it, also found its final rest.
And in that sleep of the Realm, God opened up his memory books, and looked at Melanie and Daniel, and sighed. For Daniel was to move on, again, to a new lady, as he was wont to do, and the joy and unity of Melanie and Daniel was at rest – for now anyway.
So things worked out in the end, and Daniel and Melanie found their peace and consolation, and the rest – the third great rest – came – and all was well. For a while anyway.
The End of the Chronicles of the Eternal Realm of Glory